Big Fish - Movie Quotes - Rotten Tomatoes

Big Fish Quotes

  • William Bloom: You know about icebergs, Dad?
    Edward Bloom (senior): Do I? I saw an iceberg once. They were haulin' down it down to Texas for drinkin' water. They didn't count on there bein' a elephant frozen inside. The wooly kind. A mammoth.
    William Bloom: Dad!
    Edward Bloom (senior): What?
    William Bloom: I'm tryin' to make a metaphor here.
    Edward Bloom (senior): Well, you shouldn't have started with a question, because most people wanna answer questions. You should've started with "the thing about iceberg is"


  • Ed Bloom (Young): (first lines) There are some fish that cannot be caught. It's not that they are faster or stronger than the other fish, they're just touched by somethin' extra.
    Ed Bloom (Young): There are some fish that cannot be caught. It's not that they are faster or stronger than the other fish, they're just touched by somethin' extra.


  • Dr. Bennett (Senior): Not very excitin', is it? And I suppose if I had to choose between the true version and an elaborate one involvin' a fish and a wedding ring, I might choose the fancy version. But that's just me.
    William Bloom: I kinda like your version.


  • Dr. Bennett (Senior): Did your father ever tell you about the day you were born?
    William Bloom: A thousand times. He caught an uncatchable fish.
    Dr. Bennett (Senior): Not that one. The real story. Did he ever tell you that.
    William Bloom: No.
    Dr. Bennett (Senior): Your mother came in about three in the afternoon. Her neighbor drove her, on account of your father was on business in Wichita. You were born a week early, but there were no complication. It was a perfect delivery. Now, your father was sorry to miss it, but it wasn't the custom for the men to be in the room for deliveries then, so I can't see as it would have been much different had he been there. And that's the real story of how you were born.


  • Sandra Bloom (Senior): I don't know if you're aware of this, Josephine, but African parrots, in their native homes of the Congo, they only speak French?
    Josephine: Really?
    Edward Bloom (senior): You're lucky to get four words out of them in English, but if you were to walk through the jungle, you'd hear them speakin' the most elaborate French. Those parrots talk about everything. Politics, movies, fashion. Everything but religion.
    William Bloom: Why not religion, Dad?
    Edward Bloom (senior): It's rude to talk about religion. You never know who you're gonna offend.
    William Bloom: Josephine actually went to Congo last year.
    Edward Bloom (senior): Oh, so you know.


  • Ed Bloom (Young): And now what are you doin'?
    Norther Winslow: I'm robbin' this place!


  • Amos Calloway: Sure I do! You were hot shit in Hickville, but here in the real world, you got squat! You don't have a plan, you don't have a job, you don't have anything except the clothes on your back.


  • Ed Bloom (Young): I just saw the woman I'm gonna marry. I know it. But I lost her.
    Amos Calloway: Oh, tough break. Well, most men have to get married *before* they lose their wives.
    Ed Bloom (Young): I'm gonna spend every day for the rest of my life lookin' for her. That, or die alone!
    Amos Calloway: Damn, kid. Lemme guess. Real pretty? Reddish-blondish hair? Blue dress?
    Ed Bloom (Young): Yeah!
    Amos Calloway: I know her uncle. Friends of the family.
    Ed Bloom (Young): Who is she? Where does she live?
    Amos Calloway: Forget it, kid, don't waste your time. She's out of your league.
    Ed Bloom (Young): What do you mean? You don't even know me.


  • Ping: (In Cantonese) Who are you?
    Ping: Who are you?
    Ed Bloom (Young): (In Cantonese) Please, I'm not gonna hurt you.
    Ed Bloom (Young): Please, I'm not gonna hurt you.
    Ping: (In Cantonese) Damn right you're not! GUARD!
    Ping: Damn right you're not! Guard!


  • Edward Bloom (senior): I was dryin' out.


  • Ed Bloom (Young): It was that night I discovered that most things you consider evil or wicked are simply lonely, and lackin' in the social niceties.


  • Amos Calloway: You were a big fish in a small pond, but this here is the ocean and you're drownin'. Take my advice, go back to Puddleville; you'll be happy there.


  • Edward Bloom (senior): You are in for a surprise.
    William Bloom: Am I?.
    Edward Bloom (senior): Havin' a kid changes everything. There's burpin', the midnight feedin', and the changin'.
    William Bloom: You do any of that?
    Edward Bloom (senior): No. But I hear it's terrible. Then you spent years tryin' to corrupt and mislead this child, fill his head with nonsense, and still it turns out perfectly fine.
    William Bloom: You think I'm up for it?
    Edward Bloom (senior): You learned from the best.


  • Ed Bloom (Age 10): I was thinkin' about death and all. And about seein' how you're gonna die. I mean, on one hand, if dyin' was all you thought about, it could kinda screw you up. But it could kinda help you, couldn't it? Because you'd you know that everything else you can survive.


  • William Bloom: In tellin' the story of my father's life, it's impossible to separate fact from fiction, the man from the myth. The best I can do is tell it the way he told me. It doesn't always make sense and most of it never happened... but that's what kinda story this is.


  • Edward Bloom (senior): I've been nothin' but myself since the day I was born, and if you can't see that it's your fallin', not mine.


  • Ed Bloom (Young): And what I recall of Sunday school was that the more difficult somethin' became, the more rewardin' it in the end.


  • Ed Bloom (Young): The biggest fish in the river gets that way by never bein' caught.


  • Edward Bloom (senior): Most men, they'll tell you a story straight through. It won't be complicated, but it won't be interestin' either.


  • William Bloom: (talking to his father) You're like Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny combined - just as charmin', and just as fake.
    William Bloom: You're like Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny combined - just as charmin', and just as fake.


  • William Bloom: (last lines) That was my father's final joke, I guess. A man tells his stories so many times that he becomes the stories. They live on after him. And in that way he becomes immortal.
    William Bloom: That was my father's final joke, I guess. A man tells his stories so many times that he becomes the stories. They live on after him. And in that way he becomes immortal.


  • Jenny: I loved a man who could never love me back. I was livin' in a fairytale.


  • William Bloom: we're like strangers who knew each other very well
    William Bloom: We're like strangers who knew each other very well.


  • Edward Bloom (senior): It's rude to talk about religion. You never know who you're gonna offend.


  • Josephine: Can I take you a picture?
    Edward Bloom (senior): Oh, you don't need a picture. Just look up the word "handsome" in the dictionary.
    Edward Bloom (senior): Oh, you don't need a picture. Just look up the word 'handsome' in the dictionary.


  • Ed Bloom (Young): (in line at the robbery bank) Norther, what are you doin' in here.
    Ed Bloom (Young): [in line at the robbery bank] Norther, what are you doin' in here.
    Norther Winslow: I'm robbin' this place.


  • William Bloom: A man tells his stories so many times that he becomes the stories. They live on after him, and in that way he becomes immortal.


  • Karl the Giant: I don't want to eat you. I just get so hungry. I'm just too big.
    Ed Bloom (Young): Has it ever occurred to you that maybe you're not too big? That maybe this place is just too small?


  • Ed Bloom (Young): They say when you meet the love of your life, time stops, and that's true. What they don't tell you is that when it starts again, it moves extra fast to catch up.


  • Edward Bloom (senior): Fate has a cruel way to play with us, there is a time when a man must fight. And a moment when you must accept that he lost his destiny, which sailed the boat and that only a fool would ... Actually I've always been a fool
    Edward Bloom (senior): Fate has a cruel way to play with us, there is a time when a man must fight. And a moment when you must accept that he lost his destiny, which sailed the boat and that only a fool would ... Actually I've always been a fool.


  • Edward Bloom (senior): (quoting his mother) 'The milkman dropped dead on our front porch'. See, if my momma was bangin' the milkman.
    Edward Bloom (senior): [quoting his mother] The milkman dropped dead on our front porch. See, if my momma was bangin' the milkman.


  • Little Girl: He ate mah dawg!.
    Little Girl: He ate mah dawg.


  • Ping: (in chinese) Who are you.
    Ping: Who are you?
    Ed Bloom (Young): (in chinese) Please!, I'm not gonna hurt you.
    Ed Bloom (Young): [In Cantonese] Please, I'm not going to hurt you.
    Ping: (in chinese) Damn!, right. You're not GUARD.
    Ping: [In Cantonese] Damn right you're not! GUARD!


  • Sandra Bloom (Senior): I don't think I'll ever dry out.


  • Edward Bloom (senior): I was dryin' out.
    Edward Bloom (senior): I was drying out.


  • Sandra Bloom (Young): He's almost a stranger and I prefer him to you.
    Sandra Bloom (Young): [of Edward to her fiance] He's almost a stranger, and I prefer him to you!


  • Ed Bloom (Young): Sandra Templeton, I love you and I *will* marry you.
    Ed Bloom (Young): Sandra Templeton, I love you and I WILL marry you.


  • Edward Bloom (senior): There comes a point when any reasonable man will swallow his pride and admit he made a mistake. The truth is... I was never a reasonable man.


  • Edward Bloom (senior): They say when you meet the love of your life, time stops, and that's true. What they don't tell you is that when it starts again, it moves extra fast to catch up.
    Edward Bloom (senior): They say when you meet the love of your life, time stops, and that's true. What they don't tell you is that when it starts again, it moves extra fast to catch up.


  • Ping: Bob Hope?
    Ed Bloom (Young): Bigger.


  • Josephine: Is this a tall tale?
    Edward Bloom (senior): It's not a short one!


  • Ed Bloom (Young): Now I may not have much, but I have more determination then any man you're ever likely to meet.


  • Amos Calloway: Tell me, Karl, have you ever heard the term "involuntary servitude"?


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