Hell Ride - Movie Reviews - Rotten Tomatoes

Hell Ride Reviews

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December 7, 2015
Well it wasn't good. You can certainly skip this one.
November 29, 2015
This piece of junk may go close to worst movie ever made. Have such a bunch of miscast hacks ever trotted out such ridiculous dialogue or been so unbelievable as "bikers"? I can't recall ever seeing such embarrassing garbage. Bishop comes off about as intimidating as a gay bar social director. Utter horseplop - do not waste your time. Not even to stream for free.
April 18, 2015
Incredibly difficult to follow. Filled with completely unlikable characters. Style over substance, and it doesn't have that much style.
½ April 10, 2015
A mediocre attempt to imitate Quentin Tarantino. Larry Bishop, the writer/director/lead actor, tries to copy the QT formula of tight intriguing scripts, snappy and funny dialogue and lead characters with "swagger".

Plot is OK, though has some unfathomable tangents and sub-plots. The dialogue misses the mark: rather than being "snappy and funny" it is cheesy and lame.

Bishop went so far as to cast two actors who would be instant reminders of QT films: Michael Madsen (Reservoir Dogs & Kill Bill) and David Carradine (Kill Bill). Dennis Hopper is thrown in to give the film some biker-cred (he did star in the ultimate biker movie, Easy Rider, remember). Hopper also appeared in True Romance, a movie QT wrote, so another QT reference.

The swagger is there and Michael Madsen gets it down pat. Larry Bishop himself, however, overdoes it and comes across as unconvincing.

Not the worst QT homage I've seen, but could have been better. Best thing about this is that, if you don't like it, at only 83 minutes, you won't have wasted too much of your life on it.
Super Reviewer
March 12, 2015
I'd like to open up with the fact, that I'm going to rate this film in a terribly biased manner, based on one simple fact. A simple fact of just two words. Gothic. Strippers. Yeah, there's a strip club somewhere out in the desert full of rather attractive punk and goth girls wearing little to no clothing. But without any further ado, here's my actual review of Hell Ride.

There's a couple of Tarantino greats in this film, plus a lot of his flair in the cinematography, but you could tell from the script he had very little to do with the film itself. I was counting on Vinnie Jones to hold it all together, and though he was pretty good, it was a bad role for him. So much of his power and charisma comes from the fact that he's a bad ass Brit and the character of Billy Wings was all American Male, which just didn't work. It was actually Michael Madsen playing The Gent (in the photo above) who stole the show.

The fact that every character was a 1%er, meant that none of them were particularly likeable. But it's the sort of movie were it doesn't matter quite so much. The "Sugar" or emotion of the piece was somewhat... lacking. They have this whole mother/son-revenge-betrayal-tearjerker thing going on, but honestly it was hardly worth it. They didn't put enough effort in, they just took up their quite short amount of footage by bothering to include it. I don't know, maybe I missed something but it really seemed a bit of a cop out to me.

Take all the senseless violence, bikes and copious nudity, it's very obvious that this movie's target audience is male. Which I have the good fortune of being. Still though, they're often the movies that you sort of watch once and then leave, but I'll see how it goes. Having the main character also be the person who directed the film can be awkward, so maybe this is part of the reason for some of its short-comings. But you still have to respect the guy for doing both in a full budget film.

If you're looking for a short action film that can't pick its pace, filled with liquor, tits, petrol, testosterone and Western music, then it's pretty perfect, but if you're looking for anything else in a movie, maybe go elsewhere. I didn't really feel it was a waste of time though, and I did enjoy it, just not special.

51%

-Gimly
March 11, 2015
very simplistic story, but I liked the score when and watched it over and over in high school. so sue me
February 10, 2015
I love old exploitation biker movies and this one tries to be one. It had great potential and I was excited to see it. Then I was so let down. This movie can really be summed up by those who rated it lower than me.
Robbanflix
Super Reviewer
January 2, 2015
A biker movie with a few famous actors like Dennis Hopper , Michael Madson and Vinnie Jones. Q.Tarantino have actually produced this one and there are a bit Tarantino feeling throughout the movie like the characters , music and how the story are being told etc. But the movie are still a B flick and not to good in some areas and way to short aswell. Its watchable for sure and overall decent if you dont have to much expectations.
½ June 5, 2014
I really like the throwback to the 1960s style bikersploitation films- which stars and is directed by Larry Bishop who's been around since the genre was birthed, as well as Dennis Hopper. The film was co-produced by Tarantino but it is not a Tarantini film.

Bishop relied too heavily on odd And unrealistic script and the story plays out very predictable. Still, a fun movie for a throwback to a classic genre.
January 12, 2014
Wat da Hell did it try to say exactly??!!!
December 7, 2013
Bloody slaughter of Americans always comes across well with Tarantino. Superb cinematography shows another side to bloodlust that one does not normally see in lesser made movies. If a motorcycle fan, this film has lots to offer and gives great accounts of there feel and sound. Lots of debauchery, swearing and sex, alas no men on men sex which is the films only shortcoming. Nibbles: Fruits in alcohol.
August 15, 2013
I love the 1960s biker setting but this is just trash
August 7, 2013
Me costo al principio saber quienes unos y quienes eran los otros, muchas tetas y la sangre que se ve realmente no es buena, pero al final resulta entretenida de una manera extraña
June 23, 2013
Bomb, no story, poor acting,, need I say more.
May 21, 2013
Movies like Hell Ride exist because some people, like writer, director, and star Larry Bishop, can't give up the past. Here, he plays the president of a motorcycle gang, Pistolero, although which one was lost on me. I have up caring pretty early on, to be honest. He's around the age of 60, and so are most of his colleagues. Bishop has been in biker movies before, all the way back to the late '60s, and seems to want to recapture the fun he had during that time.

The basic gist of the plot goes something like this: There is another gang that is not led by Pistolero, and therefore it's bad. Oh, there's been conflict between them for over 30 years -- the constant, annoying, pointless, and confusing flashbacks ensure this -- but now is the time to finally end things. I'm sure there are reasons behind that decision, but ignoring the inane dialogue in a movie like this is generally for the best. Essentially, Larry Bishop gets to live out a fantasy for not even 90 minutes, while also pretending to give us an insightful parody and an homage to the biker films of the '70s.

I say "pretending" because that seems to be more a ruse than anything else. Nobody here seems to want to do anything that's genuinely insightful; they're making a junky movie and that's that. The claim can be made that the people behind it are more clever than they're portrayed by their final product, but I'm not seeing it. You don't make a film this bad and then claim that it was intentionally this way. The Room creator Tommy Wiseau claims that his film was supposed to be that funny. Do you believe him?

It might not be completely fair to compare Hell Ride to The Room, especially because the former at least has enough nudity and violence to keep a male audience member's attention, but both films are beyond awful and on a second viewing, I'd pick The Room simply because it's funnier. Hell Ride tries to be funnier, and tries to be more interesting, but it fails at almost every conceivable point.

I think one of the problems is that it's clear that Bishop was trying to copy Quentin Tarantino -- the person who served as an executive producer and "presenter" of the film. A non-linear plot, dialogue that doesn't go anywhere, a kind of creepy focus on a certain female body part (in this case it's not feet) -- all of it screams "Tarantino wannabe." The problem is that Tarantino knows how to make it work, while Larry Bishop doesn't have that sort of vision or talent. His dialogue is interesting, not just overlong for the sake of taking up time.

Hell Ride doesn't even have enough content to fill the 80 minutes for which it plays. If removed of its unnecessary flashbacks and if the dialogue was kept to a minimum -- and when the writing is this poor, that would have been a blessing -- we might have a 40 minutes film here. Most of that would consist of these 50-60-year-old dudes being desired by 20-year-old, topless ladies, because that's exactly what this director wanted him and his friends to experience while on this set.

Is there anything enjoyable here? Sure. Dennis Hopper and David Carradine show up in cameo roles, two biker legends in their own rights, and that's almost always a pleasant sight to see. They, unlike the rest of the actors, actually seem to be having fun, probably because they get a paycheck and don't have to be completely embarrassed by their appearance here. Vinnie Jones plays the main villain, although despite this, he only gets a few minutes on-screen. It would've been fun to see more of him, I think, as he's often a fun presence.

Everyone else is awful. One might think that Bishop would be able to get a good performance out of himself, but he's probably the worst actor in the film. It's not just that he doesn't seem like he could actually be the president of the gang -- he doesn't look or talk the part -- but he is so unemotional that you wonder if he was half-asleep during most of the takes. Speaking of being asleep or drunk during production, Michael Madsen shows up as another one of the bikers, and while he's at least got a couple of fun moments, it doesn't add up to much.

I can get behind a terrible Z-grade movie if it's fun. That's about all that this type of film has to do in order for me to at least give it a tentative recommendation. There's nothing enjoyable, nothing worthwhile, and nothing that's even remotely interesting about this film. I just wanted to smile or laugh for most of it, and all I felt was sad; I was disappointed that anybody would finance this and that this many actors would agree to be a part of it.

There are movies that are so bad, they're good, and others that are so bad that they're a complete waste of time and there's no reason to even consider giving them the time of day. Hell Ride is so awful that not even the sight of naked ladies -- of which there plenty, especially in its first half -- could bring cheer to it. Everyone, save for cameos from Dennis Hopper and David Carradine, is so drab and down, despite all these actors in or past middle age getting to live out a director's misogynistic fantasy. What an awful movie.
½ April 19, 2013
Was looking forward to this for ages,what a pile of shite it turned out to be,Waste of a great cast,Best bit was Vinnie Jones getting Killed at the end
April 2, 2013
Cheap B-imitation of a Tarantino film where even normally good actors deliver bad performances. Also this has some of the worst, most irritating, awkward dialogue I've ever heard. Complete waste of time.
½ March 31, 2013
Hmmm, sort of tries to be a Tarantino film, without having a strong enough story or lead. Lots of violence, lots of flesh, and some truly stunningly bad accents, especially Vinnie Jones'! In some places it feels like a parody, without being funny, so I'd ignore this if I were you and watch Comic Strip's A Fistful of Travellers Cheques instead!
March 19, 2013
I love old exploitation biker movies and this one tries to be one. It had great potetial and I was excited to see it. Then I was so let down. This movie can really be summed up by those who rated it lower than me.
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