Reviews

  • Nov 07, 2019

    I just couldn't with the dark haired chick, her character drove me nuts and her dumb ass boyfriend who locked them in there. He should've killed himself of guilt at the end and I would've given this 3 stars. Scout Taylor Compton is impressive as always.

    I just couldn't with the dark haired chick, her character drove me nuts and her dumb ass boyfriend who locked them in there. He should've killed himself of guilt at the end and I would've given this 3 stars. Scout Taylor Compton is impressive as always.

  • Jun 19, 2018

    Spoiler Warning 247 Degrees F was based on a true story... in the sense that some people got stuck in a cooling sauna for 10 hours. That's sort of where the excitement ends for the true story. The movie blows it up to an extremely dramatic level as movies do; having someone die, the heat never stops climbing, and the people inside are kind of ridiculous. Whoever wrote this story doesn't seem to like women, as the two girls trapped in the sauna are irrational, annoying, and 1000% useless. The one guy is the only person trying to get them out of there, sacrificing himself in many ways to get them free, while the girls complain, whine, and do nothing but hurt them all. I think it could have been an interesting concept if the characters weren't so unbearable.

    Spoiler Warning 247 Degrees F was based on a true story... in the sense that some people got stuck in a cooling sauna for 10 hours. That's sort of where the excitement ends for the true story. The movie blows it up to an extremely dramatic level as movies do; having someone die, the heat never stops climbing, and the people inside are kind of ridiculous. Whoever wrote this story doesn't seem to like women, as the two girls trapped in the sauna are irrational, annoying, and 1000% useless. The one guy is the only person trying to get them out of there, sacrificing himself in many ways to get them free, while the girls complain, whine, and do nothing but hurt them all. I think it could have been an interesting concept if the characters weren't so unbearable.

  • Sep 12, 2016

    Within a confine space, this movie acted well and it was quite exciting and gripping the fight to survival.

    Within a confine space, this movie acted well and it was quite exciting and gripping the fight to survival.

  • Apr 25, 2016

    A concept that might actually be interesting, or at least campy fun, in the right hands instead results in a completely laughable excuse for thrills due to the pure lack of competence of the filmmakers involved with this film's production. The production value feels like made-for-TV quality: one scene has camera angles that wouldn't feel out of place in a hidden camera prank show. The characters are inexcusably unlikeable and unsympathetic, even the ones that are clearly supposed to be likeable. The actors (all five of them) are horrible. The writing is all over the place, with characters knowing every working detail of how a sauna works, but having no idea what heat stroke is and thinking sticking a wet rag in a light socket is a good idea: all of this, of course, only comes into play once the characters are done screaming at the top of their lungs over and over. There's not much more to say about this one except that it's one of the worst films ever made. Everyone involved should be ashamed of themselves.

    A concept that might actually be interesting, or at least campy fun, in the right hands instead results in a completely laughable excuse for thrills due to the pure lack of competence of the filmmakers involved with this film's production. The production value feels like made-for-TV quality: one scene has camera angles that wouldn't feel out of place in a hidden camera prank show. The characters are inexcusably unlikeable and unsympathetic, even the ones that are clearly supposed to be likeable. The actors (all five of them) are horrible. The writing is all over the place, with characters knowing every working detail of how a sauna works, but having no idea what heat stroke is and thinking sticking a wet rag in a light socket is a good idea: all of this, of course, only comes into play once the characters are done screaming at the top of their lungs over and over. There's not much more to say about this one except that it's one of the worst films ever made. Everyone involved should be ashamed of themselves.

  • Jan 28, 2016

    reviewed on facebook.com/throatpunchhorror TITLE: 247° Fahrenheit WATCHED ON: Screambox CAST: Scout Taylor-Compton, Travis Van Winkle and Tyler Mane WRITER: Lloyd S. Wagner, Levan Bakhia DIRECTOR: Levan Bakhia, Beqa Jguburia REVIEW BASED ON 4 FACTORS 1: ACTING 2: PLOT 3: GORE 4: FEAR/SURPRISE BREAKDOWN: When four friends travel to a lakeside cabin for a carefree weekend, the fun turns into a nightmare when three of them end up locked in a hot sauna. MY TAKE: supposedly based on true events, this always gives me pause ever since the blair witch (failure). The acting left a lot to be desired, so for that I give ½ a skull The plot to me was great I give it 2 skulls The gore consisted of a guy cutting his hand and a girl getting cracked in the head. I believe their fake blood budget was about 4 dollars therefore gaining zero skulls for gore Fear/Surprise another zero there was no fear inducing scenes (unless you're claustrophobic then there may have been some fear, but I doubt it) also there were no surprises gaining another zero skulls The music was ungodly loud throughout the whole show, you could not hear the spoken lines when the music was playing, which made it hard to follow along with any spoken parts. I'm going with a 2½ skull performance on this one. If you are extremely bored and have exhausted all other possibilities then watch this one, otherwise save your 90 minutes for something else

    reviewed on facebook.com/throatpunchhorror TITLE: 247° Fahrenheit WATCHED ON: Screambox CAST: Scout Taylor-Compton, Travis Van Winkle and Tyler Mane WRITER: Lloyd S. Wagner, Levan Bakhia DIRECTOR: Levan Bakhia, Beqa Jguburia REVIEW BASED ON 4 FACTORS 1: ACTING 2: PLOT 3: GORE 4: FEAR/SURPRISE BREAKDOWN: When four friends travel to a lakeside cabin for a carefree weekend, the fun turns into a nightmare when three of them end up locked in a hot sauna. MY TAKE: supposedly based on true events, this always gives me pause ever since the blair witch (failure). The acting left a lot to be desired, so for that I give ½ a skull The plot to me was great I give it 2 skulls The gore consisted of a guy cutting his hand and a girl getting cracked in the head. I believe their fake blood budget was about 4 dollars therefore gaining zero skulls for gore Fear/Surprise another zero there was no fear inducing scenes (unless you're claustrophobic then there may have been some fear, but I doubt it) also there were no surprises gaining another zero skulls The music was ungodly loud throughout the whole show, you could not hear the spoken lines when the music was playing, which made it hard to follow along with any spoken parts. I'm going with a 2½ skull performance on this one. If you are extremely bored and have exhausted all other possibilities then watch this one, otherwise save your 90 minutes for something else

  • Mar 26, 2015

    this shouldnt be classed as a horror or isnt scary or gory. the idea is good as fuck everyone would be frightened nuts eyc if thought they were trapped in a sauna. major problem the actors all pish and annoying.

    this shouldnt be classed as a horror or isnt scary or gory. the idea is good as fuck everyone would be frightened nuts eyc if thought they were trapped in a sauna. major problem the actors all pish and annoying.

  • Feb 06, 2015

    A horror film about a sauna? Get real.

    A horror film about a sauna? Get real.

  • Dec 04, 2014

    This is one of the shittiest among shittiest horror films that I have ever seen. The plot is stupid. The acting is annoying. The music is generally unfitting. The movie is too long for what it's about. There's so much filler. Two chics in lingerie almost the whole film is the only redeeming quality of this film, but not enough to raise it from the lowest rating that I can give to any film. Nothing is logical in the film. How does nobody have a cell phone? Or carries it on them and then the way they get locked in was so ridiculous and how they escape too...the worst part about the film. Let's try the sauna...okay too hot, jump in the lake...too wet, back in the sauna...one of the characters says he needs to piss...but is so drunk he trips over stuff allowing a random ass ladder to lodge between the door and some shelf or something causing the other three to be tortured in the sauna until the end of the movie. Dumbest plot ever? It is. Creativity doesn't exist anymore in horror. The genre's is as dead to white people as hip-hop is to black folks. What's even weirder about this film is the reunion of the adult Michael Myers as the savior of the film along with the girl who played his childhood babysitter, Laurie Strode. Why they are both again in another "shitty" horror film is beyond me. Besides the beginning of the reboot, I liked films.

    This is one of the shittiest among shittiest horror films that I have ever seen. The plot is stupid. The acting is annoying. The music is generally unfitting. The movie is too long for what it's about. There's so much filler. Two chics in lingerie almost the whole film is the only redeeming quality of this film, but not enough to raise it from the lowest rating that I can give to any film. Nothing is logical in the film. How does nobody have a cell phone? Or carries it on them and then the way they get locked in was so ridiculous and how they escape too...the worst part about the film. Let's try the sauna...okay too hot, jump in the lake...too wet, back in the sauna...one of the characters says he needs to piss...but is so drunk he trips over stuff allowing a random ass ladder to lodge between the door and some shelf or something causing the other three to be tortured in the sauna until the end of the movie. Dumbest plot ever? It is. Creativity doesn't exist anymore in horror. The genre's is as dead to white people as hip-hop is to black folks. What's even weirder about this film is the reunion of the adult Michael Myers as the savior of the film along with the girl who played his childhood babysitter, Laurie Strode. Why they are both again in another "shitty" horror film is beyond me. Besides the beginning of the reboot, I liked films.

  • Jun 10, 2014

    I felt this film's cast delivered and the storyline is great. The idea of this happening as a movie plot is something I've never seen in any movie. It's well executed for a low budget movie, but the pacing and reason the got stuck could have been better than what they provided.

    I felt this film's cast delivered and the storyline is great. The idea of this happening as a movie plot is something I've never seen in any movie. It's well executed for a low budget movie, but the pacing and reason the got stuck could have been better than what they provided.

  • Feb 05, 2014

    This sizzling spa has just inspired me not to ever go to a sauna! EVER!

    This sizzling spa has just inspired me not to ever go to a sauna! EVER!