Alone in the Dark - Movie Reviews - Rotten Tomatoes

Alone in the Dark Reviews

Page 1 of 6
February 7, 2017
Don't watch Alone in the Dark. Not even as a joke. It's eighty minutes that absolutely no one can give you back. [Full review in Spanish]
January 28, 2005
Too stupid to watch, too loud to nap through, Alone in the Dark shows just how tenuous Plan Nine From Outer Space's hold on that 'worst movie ever' title really is.
Read More | Original Score: 1/5
February 8, 2005
You start hoping that Ashton Kutcher is going to come out and tell them they're punk'd, because you just can't believe this is for real. You feel sorry for these actors...
Full Review | Original Score: 2/10
January 27, 2005
Reid delivers her lines as though she is calling for another round of Mai Tais for the house.
Read More | Original Score: D
January 29, 2005
One of the worst movies ever made.
Full Review | Original Score: .5/4
February 5, 2005
There's plenty to snicker at.
Full Review | Original Score: 1/4
May 29, 2008
The late Gene Siskel once devised a simple method of measuring a film's worth: 'Is this film more interesting than a documentary of the same actors having lunch?' 'Alone in the Dark' doesn't come close to matching that standard.
Full Review | Original Score: .5/4
February 1, 2005
Somewhere, Ed Wood is resting pretty comfortably right now.
Full Review | Original Score: 1/5
February 5, 2005
In this chintzy video-game blow-up, Christian Slater battles zombies and transmogrified beasties, revealing the horror of a once-promising career turned miserable.
Full Review | Original Score: 1/4
January 27, 2005
Laughably bad.
Read More | Original Score: 0/4
January 28, 2005
Tara Reid responds to the camera like she's just caught a paparazzo; every line of dialogue begins with, 'Hey guys,' be it ordering lunch or reacting to mortal danger.
February 7, 2005
It's never good when the audience starts laughing as soon as the movie begins -- and nothing has happened.
Full Review | Original Score: 1/5
January 28, 2005
Never trust a movie that opens with a written introduction scrolling by that's longer than the collected works of Tom Clancy.
Read More | Original Score: 1/4
January 29, 2005
Alone in the Dark doesn't even deserve the indignity of going straight-to-video
Full Review | Original Score: .5/4
January 27, 2005
Saying Uwe Boll's Alone in the Dark is better than his 2003 American debut House of the Dead is akin to praising syphilis for not being HIV.
Full Review | Original Score: .5/4
February 7, 2005
For as busy as this movie is, you'd think it would have more going on. Instead, it's just a big, chewy wad of badness.
Full Review | Original Score: F
January 27, 2005
The three stars have seen better days, but I'd like to think they could still do something classier and more dignified than this. Like gay porn.
Full Review | Original Score: F
January 26, 2005
If anyone were pondering what Ed Wood would be like today if he were armed with foreign financing and computer effects, look no further than Uwe Boll.
Full Review | Original Score: F
January 27, 2005
...films like 'Battlefield Earth' and 'The Adventures of Pluto Nash' await a film of this magnitude because it gets awfully lonely on the island of misfit movies.
Full Review | Original Score: 1/10
January 27, 2005
Obvious dry humping to inappropriate music doesn't cut it in a horror flick - at least give us some skin.
Full Review | Original Score: 1/5
Page 1 of 6