Baby's Day Out Reviews
This is a slapstick comedy aimed at really little kids and I'm sure they will enjoy it, but as an adult it gets tedious and frustrating. The problem is that the criminals who are chasing Baby Bink are so stupid you kind of lose interest in the plot. I get that without the baby escaping there would be no movie but these guys are so dumb they would be dead within minutes in the real world. They're getting hit in the head with hammers, getting run over, getting set on fire, getting attacked by animals, receive numerous crotch shots, get beaten up by random strangers and even fall down hundreds of feet when they chase Baby Bink around a construction site. The only reason these guys don't get caught within thirty minutes of the plot is that everyone else in this world is either equally stupid or has absolutely no peripheral vision whatsoever. There is a scene where Baby Bink is crawling through New York Traffic and not only does nobody notice except for the bad guys chasing him, but the baby never gets scared of the loud noise and he crosses the street just fine. It's not that I wanted the baby to get run over, but when a camera man points his camera at the baby on live television and the only three people who notice in the city are our bumbling criminals the movie loses all believability. Yes I realize the movie is not supposed to be realistic, but "Baby's Day Out" wants to be a live action cartoon and it just doesn't work. So it's pretty much established that the baby is so low to the ground that no one notices him. Fine. In that case then, shouldn't he get stepped on while inside huge crowds at the mall? I'm not asking for the baby to get hurt, I'm asking for some kind of rules to this universe. "Harry Potter" has rules, and that was all about magic!
While watching the movie I was wondering to myself why it wasn't working when it is so similar to another John Hughes piece, "Home Alone". My theory is that with the Macaulay Culkin movie the criminals were dumb but there really wasn't any reason for them to give up trying to catch Kevin. He had seen their face and would report them to the police so it's an "in for a penny, in for a pound" sort of thing. Because the film is mostly set inside a single house filled with booby traps, the villains figured there was only so much punishment that could be thrown at them before they triggered every single one and also, they were dumb enough to keep falling for the traps but intelligent enough to realize that they were grown men and could probably, eventually outsmart or out muscle the kid they were after. Here, the villains have the baby and they've given their ransom demands. Who cares if they don't have the baby? Just collect the money, give the police a bogus lie about where he is and then you're home free! Yeah that sounds cruel but come on, these guys aren't good guys stuck in a rut, they're bank robbers and kidnappers! The fact that every single thing that could go wrong with them goes wrong should maybe clue them in to the fact that this just isn't their day. They should just give up, particularly after getting set on fire while police officers are standing there oblivious (the dumbest police officers I've ever seen in a movie by the way). No matter how hard the movie tries you just can't get over that little voice in your head that tells you that falling dozens of feet onto a metal girder would hurt you so badly you would just throw in the towel.
For positive points, I will admit that the gorilla they use in the film is actually really good (far better than the one on the Dvd cover) and that it's hard not to get emotionally attached to the baby crawling around. Nevertheless I found the movie to be a chore to get through because it's so repetitive and so predictable. I can't really recommend it to anyone except for the littlest kids who haven't seen "Home Alone" or any "Looney Tunes" Cartoons. (Widescreen version on Dvd, June 22, 2014)
Fuck the pain away,