Battleship - Movie Reviews - Rotten Tomatoes

Battleship Reviews

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½ May 18, 2016
Battleship. Somebody thought that it would be a good idea to make a movie based on Battleship. A board game with no semblance of story whatsoever. Whoever greenlit this film deserves to be fired and blacklisted from Hollywood.

It would be one thing if Battleship was self-aware of how stupid it is, and played upon the absurdity of this idea. But no, the filmmakers behind this film go full speed ahead with a story that takes itself pretty seriously, and adds in some cringeworthy military circlejerking to boot. Director Peter Berg does little more with this material than show off how many explosions he can cram into a 130 minute blockbuster. Aside from the aforementioned pro-military themes, a concept that Berg has shown much passion for, you can tell the man just doesn't care. The cast sure doesn't care either: of course, it doesn't help that each character in this movie is just a standard archetype drawn from the pool of typical character traits. Taylor Kitsch is bland, and does little to nothing to try to stand out as anything more than an attractive bro-type hero. Rihanna is just dreadfully bad, even though her dialogue is never any more complex than confused questions and stern responses to commands. Even Liam Neeson seems bored, and phones in his performance (which amounts to all of 15 minutes or so).

It's loud, it's dumb, it's nonsensical, and, despite some decent visual effects, it's just ugly. You can put a white peg through this one, because Battleship is a miss.
May 6, 2016
It takes FOREVER to get going. The build-up is about 20 minutes too long. Too much time is spent trying to make us care about these characters. It was marketed very poorly. So I get why it failed.

However, when the action starts, when the aliens show up, I'm not ashamed to admit I was entertained as hell. The movie didn't try to be more than what it was, just a little entertaining action movie with a little cat/mouse chess match like drama. It was cheesy as hell when they brought in the grid system like the board game, but this was an occasion where I ate up the cheese.
April 30, 2016
Two words: peg missiles. Hilarious.
April 21, 2016
terrible awful movie
April 16, 2016
Not entirely godawful, though definitely not entirely...not godawful. Peter Berg has somewhat more intelligence as a director than Michael Bay, but this is still a very overblown, Bay-ish effort. I found it a bit odd that the two all-American brothers are played by an obvious-accented Canadian and an even-more-obvious-accented Swede, but less odd than the fact that Rihanna didn't annoy me at all. The very idea that this movie is 'based on' the game (and that Hasbro is now apparently a film production company) annoys and infuriates me, but, while this is not grade-A cinema by any stretch of the imagination, it's not a total bust, either. So, in Battleship terms, I suppose it's a miss, but a surprisingly near one.
April 10, 2016
Pretty good. Big action blockbuster. Entertaining.
jamrcla
Super Reviewer
½ March 26, 2016
Now days I expect too much from films like these, Im not saying it's not a bad film because it's not I just wanted more action scenes on and off shore but what action there was they did it well.
The special effects were very well done, A little slow to get in the swing of things and in my opinion focuses too much on characters which isn't always a bad thing but in these movies there's no need, It's not as good as I hoped but worth watching for the battle scenes, Nothing more.
March 24, 2016
It takes FOREVER to get going. The build-up is about 20 minutes too long. Too much time is spent trying to make us care about these characters. It was marketed very poorly. So I get why it failed. However, when the action starts, when the aliens show up, I'm not ashamed to admit I was entertained as hell. It didn't try to be more than what it was, just a little entertaining action movie with a little cat/mouse chess match like drama. It was cheesy as hell when they brought in the grid system like the board game, but this was an occasion where I ate up the cheese.
March 8, 2016
One of my top ten movies: action with comedy AND sci fi...once again SciFi on RT is just not appreciated. Come on voters represent.
½ February 21, 2016
A Waste of Time!

Originally written December 1, 2012--
I read all of the rotten reviews this movie received last summer, and because I saw the fantastic 'Marvel's The Avengers' so many times in the theater, I figured I would just watch this one once it came out on DVD and Blu Ray. Well, I finally found the time to watch this stinker of a film during Thanksgiving break. I was Very disappointed. Don't waste your time on this mashup between Transformers, Independence Day, and the original board game. Seriously. It's just not worth it.
½ February 11, 2016
The vets kinda saved this one. The only good part is the action. The rest I fast forwarded through.
February 10, 2016
Loads of fun with tons of explosive action and special effects but cliched at moments along with some iffy acting. Its not the best action movie in the world, but certainly not the worst. It's a silly and over the top action movie that doesn't have the best acting or dialogue, but that doesn't mean there isn't fun to be had with it.
February 9, 2016
you know it's not bad for ehat it is but it's unforgivably bad for what it's trying too be i thoughts taking a good board game like battleship and making it into a movie would be fun to watch in a Olympus has fallen or war games kind of way but being a Michael bay ripoff it's does not work AT ALL!!!!! >:(
½ February 3, 2016
120913: Someone told me "Battleship" was a terrible movie. Well, it's a terribly, terribly, bad movie. So terribly bad that it was entertaining. Couldn't help thinking how much my father would've loved this film. Wish I could've seen the smile on his face, his hearty laugh. He would've loved it. Stacked with heroes, action, violence, cool aliens and destruction; It's down right bad, bad in a good way. Bad acting to boot. I'm so conflicted but smiling as I write this. Battleship made me laugh it was so bad, but laughing is a good thing. Don't start this film looking for any depth. It's not deep, just stupidly entertaining for some reason. Well worth a one watch, preferably on a big screen and surround sound. Don't forget to crank the subwoofer up! You're about to get a weeks worth of action...and movie indigestion.
jjnxn
Super Reviewer
February 3, 2016
What the hell are aliens doing in a movie called Battleship? Really quite stupid.
½ January 24, 2016
Too much boom and too little sensible storyline.
½ January 24, 2016
More strategic way of combat.
January 23, 2016
I give it two stars (and not just one) only because it's so laughably stupid.
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