The Breakfast Club - Movie Quotes - Rotten Tomatoes

The Breakfast Club Quotes

  • Richard Vernon: What if your home, your family... What if your dope was on fire?
    John Bender: Impossible, sir. It's in Johnson's underwear.


  • Brian Johnson: You know, there's not supposed to be any monkey business.
    John Bender: Young man, have you finished your paper?


  • John Bender: Well, I don't know any lepers either, but I'm not gonna run out and join one of their fucking clubs.


  • Andrew Clark: You ask me one more question and I'm beating the shit out of you.


  • Claire Standish: Excuse me Sir, but why would anyone want to steal a screw?


  • Andrew Clark: If I lose my temper you're totalled man
    Andrew Clark: If I lose my temper, you're totaled man.
    John Bender: Totally?
    Andrew Clark: Totally.


  • Allison Reynolds: When you grow up... your heart dies.
    John Bender: Who cares?
    Allison Reynolds: I care.


  • Andrew Clark: Why do you need a fake ID?
    Brian Johnson: To vote.


  • Andrew Clark: We're all bizarre, some of us are just better at hiding it.


  • John Bender: I wanna be an airborne ranger!


  • Andrew Clark: We're all pretty bizarre. Some of us are just better at hiding it, that's all.


  • Andrew Clark: [John Bender is tearing up books] That's really intelligent.
    Andrew Clark: That's really intelligent.
    John Bender: You're right. It's wrong to literature. It's such fun to read. And [examines title] Moe-Lay really pumps my nads.
    John Bender: You're right. It's wrong to literature. It's such fun to read. And Moe-Lay really pumps my nads.
    Claire Standish: Moliere.


  • John Bender: [pointing to Claire's lunch] What's that?
    John Bender: What's that?
    Claire Standish: Sushi.
    John Bender: Sushi?
    Claire Standish: Rice, raw fish and seaweed.
    John Bender: You won't accept a guy's tongue in your mouth, and you're going to eat that?
    Claire Standish: Can i eat?
    John Bender: I don't know. Give it a try.


  • John Bender: [after putting his heads between Claire's legs under the table] It was an accident.
    John Bender: It was an accident.
    Claire Standish: You're an asshole.
    John Bender: Sue me.


  • John Bender: Screws fall out all the time, the world is an imperfect place.


  • John Bender: You know what I got for Christmas this year? It was a banner fuckin' year at the old Bender family. I got a carton of cigarettes. The old man grabbed me and said "Hey. Smoke up Johnny."


  • Allison Reynolds: [after Andrew says he would drive to school naked for one million dollars] I'd do that. I'll do anything sexual, and I don't need a million dollars to do it either. I'm a nymphomaniac
    Allison Reynolds: I'd do that. I'll do anything sexual, and I don't need a million dollars to do it either. I'm a nymphomaniac


  • Allison Reynolds: Well, if you say you haven't, you're a prude. If you say you have you're a slut. It's a trap. You want to but you can't, and when you do you wish you didn't, right?
    Allison Reynolds: Well, if you say you haven't, you're a prude. If you say you have you're a slut. It's a trap. You want to but you can't and when you do you wish you didn't, right?


  • Brian Johnson: I'm a fucking idiot because I can't make a lamp?
    John Bender: No. You're a genius because you can't make a lamp.


  • Allison Reynolds: I don't have to runaway and live in the street. I can runaway and I can go to the ocean, I can go to the country, I can go to the mountains. I could go to Israel, Africa, Afghanistan
    Allison Reynolds: I don't have to runaway and live in the street. I can runaway and I can go to the ocean, I can go to the country, I can go to the mountains. I could go to Israel, Africa, Afghanistan.


  • John Bender: Does Barry Manilow know that you raid his wardrobe?


  • Claire Standish: I hate it. I hate having to go along with everything my friends say.


  • Allison Reynolds: Your middle name is Ralph, as in puke, your birth date's March 12th, you're 5'9 and a half, you weigh 130 pounds and your social security number is 049380913.


  • John Bender: You know how you said before, how your parents use you to get back at each other? Wouldn't I be outstanding in that capacity?


  • Claire Standish: Do you know how popular I am? I am so popular. Everybody loves me so much at this school.
    John Bender: Poor baby.


  • Andrew Clark: Why do you have to insult everybody?
    John Bender: I'm being honest, asshole. I would expect you to know the difference.


  • John Bender: So you just stick to the things you know. Shopping, nail polish, your father's BMW & your poor, rich drunk mother in Caribbean!
    John Bender: So you just stick to the things you know. Shopping, nail polish, your father's BMW and your poor, rich, drunk mother in the Caribbean!
    Claire Standish: SHUT UP!
    Claire Standish: Shut up!


  • John Bender: Does Barry Manilow know that you raid his wardrobe?


  • John Bender: God! You're so pathetic. Don't you ever, *ever* compare yourself to me, okay. You got everything, and I got shit. Fuckin' Repunzel, right? School would probably, fuckin' shut down if you didn't show up. Queenie, isn't here. I like those earrings, Claire.


  • Andrew Clark: Just me. Just you and me. Two hits. Me hitting you. You hitting the floor. Anytime you're ready, pal.


  • John Bender: I mean even if he had a nice personality and a cool car... although you'd probably have to ride in the back seat because his nuts would ride shotgun
    John Bender: I mean even if he had a nice personality and a cool car... although you'd probably have to ride in the back seat because his nuts would ride shotgun.


  • John Bender: Claire, you wanna see a picture of a guy with elephantitis of the nuts? It's pretty tasty.


  • Carl: When I was a kid, I wanted to be John Lennon.


  • Claire Standish: Why didn't you want me to know that you are a virgin?
    Brian Johnson: Because it's my business - my personal business.
    John Bender: Well, Brian, it doesn't sound like you're doing any business.


  • Richard Vernon: The next time I have to come in here I'm crackin' skulls.


  • Andrew Clark: Yo wastoid, you're not gonna blaze up in here.


  • John Bender: I'll bet he bought those for you. I bet those were a Christmas gift. You know what I got for Christmas? Oh, it was a banner fucking year at the old Bender family. I got a carton of cigarettes. The old man grabbed me and said, "Hey, smoke up Johnny." Alright? So go home and cry to your Daddy. Don't cry here, okay?
    John Bender: I'll bet he bought those for you. I bet those were a Christmas gift. You know what I got for Christmas? Oh, it was a banner fucking year at the old Bender family. I got a carton of cigarettes. The old man grabbed me and said, 'Hey, smoke up Johnny.' Alright? So go home and cry to your Daddy. Don't cry here, okay?


  • Claire Standish: Claire. It's a family name.
    John Bender: Oh, it's a fat girl's name.


  • John Bender: Uh, Dick? Excuse me; Rich. Will milk be made available to us?


  • John Bender: I wanna be just like you. I figure all I need, is a lobotomy and some tights.


  • John Bender: Well, Brian, this is a very nutritious lunch. All the food groups are represented. Did your mom marry Mr. Rogers?
    Brian Johnson: Uh, no. Mr. Johnson.


  • Allison Reynolds: I'd do that. I'll do anything sexual, and I don't need a million dollars to do it either. I'm a nymphomaniac.


  • Allison Reynolds: I never did it either. I'm not a nymphomaniac. I'm a compulsive liar.


  • Allison Reynolds: I don't have to runaway and live in the street. I can runaway and I can go to the ocean, I can go to the country, I can go to the mountains. I could go to Israel, Africa, Afghanistan.


  • Richard Vernon: You think he's funny? You think this is cute? You think he's "bitchin," is that it? Let me tell you something. Look at him - he's a bum. You want to see something funny? You go visit John Bender in five years. You'll see how goddamned funny he is.
    Richard Vernon: You think he's funny? You think this is cute? You think he's 'bitchin,' is that it? Let me tell you something. Look at him - he's a bum. You want to see something funny? You go visit John Bender in five years. You'll see how goddamned funny he is.


  • Andrew Clark: If I lose my temper you're totalled, man.


  • Andrew Clark: You ask me one more question and I'm beating the shit out of you.


  • John Bender: Remember how you said your parents use you to get back at each other?
    Claire Standish: [nods]
    John Bender: Wouldn't I be OUTSTANDING in that capacity?


  • Brian Johnson: When you pull the trunk, the light was supposed to come on and mine...well...didn't turn on.
    John Bender: Fucking idiot
    John Bender: Fucking idiot.
    Brian Johnson: I'm a fucking idiot because I can't make a lamp?
    John Bender: No, you're a GENIUS because you can't make a lamp!


  • Richard Vernon: Why did that door close?
    Claire Standish: I think the screw fell out, sir.
    Richard Vernon: Who took the screw? Bender, where's the screw?
    John Bender: I don't have it, sir
    Richard Vernon: Don't lie to me!
    John Bender: I'm not lying! Screws fall out, the world is an imperfect place!


  • John Bender: Hey, Sporto! Do you get along with YOUR parents?
    Andrew Clark: If I say yes, then I'm an idiot, right?
    John Bender: You're an idiot anyway! But if you say that you get along with your parents, then you're a liar too.


  • Andrew Clark: Speak for yourself.
    John Bender: You really think I'd speak for you? I don't even know your language!


  • Richard Vernon: Any questions?
    John Bender: Yeah, I got a question. Does Barry Manilow know that you raid his wardrobe?


  • Brian Johnson: Dear Mr. Vernon, we accept the fact that we had to sacrifice a whole Saturday in detention for whatever it was we did wrong. What we did *was* wrong. But we think you're crazy to make an essay telling you who we think we are. You see us as you want to see us... In the simplest terms, in the most convenient definitions. But what we found out is that each one of us is a brain...
    Andrew Clark: ...and an athlete...
    Allison Reynolds: ...and a basket case...
    Claire Standish: ...a princess...
    John Bender: ...and a criminal...
    Brian Johnson: Does that answer your question?... Sincerely yours, the Breakfast Club.


  • Brian Johnson: Saturday, March 24,1984. Shermer High School, Shermer, Illinois, 60062. Dear Mr. Vernon, We accept the fact that we had to sacrifice a whole Saturday in detention for whatever it was we did wrong. What we did *was* wrong. But we think you're crazy to make us write an essay telling you who we think we are. What do you care? You see us as you want to see us - in the simplest terms, in the most convenient definitions. You see us as a brain, an athlete, a basket case, a princess and a criminal. Correct? That's the way we saw each other at 7:00 this morning. We were brainwashed.


  • Claire Standish: (To Alison) You.. are... such... a *bitch*.
    Claire Standish: [to Alison] You.. are... such... a *bitch*.
    Claire Standish: [to Alison] You.. are... such... a bitch.


  • Allison Reynolds: I stole your wallet.
    Brian Johnson: Well, give it back.


  • John Bender: You know, I don't think that I need to hang with you fuckin' dildos anymore.


  • Allison Reynolds: you wanna know what i did to get in here... nothing! i had nothing better to do
    Allison Reynolds: You wanna know what I did to get in here... nothing! I had nothing better to do.
    John Bender: (to principal) does Barry Manilow know that you raid his wardrobe?
    John Bender: [to principal] Does Barry Manilow know that you raid his wardrobe?


  • John Bender: Sushi? You won't accept a guy's tongue in your mouth but your going to eat that?


  • John Bender: EAT...MY...SHORTS!!!
    John Bender: EAT... MY... SHORTS!


  • Richard Vernon: Why is that door closed?. WHY IS THAT DOOR CLOSED?.
    Richard Vernon: Why is that door closed? WHY IS THAT DOOR CLOSED?


  • Brian Johnson: We accept the fact that we had to sacrifice a whole saturday for whatever we did wrong, but we think you're crazy to make us write an essay telling you who we think we are. You see us as you want to see us. In the simplest terms, the most convenient definitions but what we found out that each one of us is a brain...
    Brian Johnson: Dear Mr. Vernon, we accept the fact that we had to sacrifice a whole Saturday in detention for whatever it was that we did wrong. What we did was wrong. But we think you're crazy to make us write this essay telling you who we think we are. What do you care? You see us as you want to see us... in the simplest terms and the most convenient definitions. You see us as a brain..
    Andrew Clark: ...and an athlete...
    Andrew Clark: ...and an athlete.
    Allison Reynolds: ...and a basketcase...
    Allison Reynolds: ...and a basket case.
    Claire Standish: ...a princess...
    Claire Standish: ...a princess.
    John Bender: ...and a criminal.
    Brian Johnson: Does that answer your question? Sincerely yours, the Breakfast Club.


  • Allison Reynolds: "When you grow up, your heart dies"
    Allison Reynolds: When you grow up, your heart dies.


  • John Bender: I figure all I need is a lobotomy and some tights.
    Brian Johnson: You wear tights?
    Andrew Clark: No. I wear the required uniform.
    Brian Johnson: Tights.
    Andrew Clark: Shut up.


  • Claire Standish: Do you know how popular I am? I am so popular. Everybody loves me so much at this school.
    John Bender: Poor baby.


  • Richard Vernon: Don't mess with the bull, young man. You'll get the horns!


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