The Chosen One (1998)
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Tough Girls With Big Tits In Tight Clothes. This is a Troma movie. Troma specializes in low budget movies with cheap monster makeup, badly done violence, and bad acting. When they have special effects they are cheap or not used at all. For a Troma movie this movie is tame. There was very little gore and overdone violence. There is no real story. They use a disembodied narrator who explains nothing. Good movies don't need a narrator. It's supposed to be an origin story of a superhero. But the heroine has no superpowers. The old Superman TV show did a better job of depicting superpowers. All they showed in this movie was female cat fights in superhero costumes. There is a little nudity and some simulated sex. This was Carmen Electra's first movie. She had enough sexy scenes to get Hollywood's attention and made her a star. There is not enough talking for a good quote. There is hardly any talking at all. Just a lot of running around and fighting.
Any film that has Shauna Sands running has my vote. This is not a great piece of film, but it is better than some of Troma's previous work. If you like Carmen or Shauna then see it.
What happens when you take one part "The Crow", one part alcohol induced haze and two parts of Carmen Electra and mix them in a bowl? Showtime Beyond provided the answer in the form of this slapped together piece of crap called "The Chosen One: Legend of the Raven". I tried to follow this movie as best I could, but it was hard. I think it went something like this; McKenna is branded as the new Raven, she denies it, develops a fetish for milk and sex and then puts on a costume made of silver spandex, spiked wristbands and some wacky metal headgear. Then she fights the bad guy, who in the case, is a chick named Nora. Then it ends. I think. As the movie ends, McKenna says to Nora, "Come into the light or your soul will be damned for ever" to which she replies, "I'd rather live in the darkness". I wish I had lived in darkness for the hour and a half that this crap was on my TV.
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