Clash of the Titans Reviews
After 6 years I say if the movie was a trailer it would be amazing
The two hours for this movie was too long, and too boring at times
They even shoehorned in a joke which fell completely flat by showing the golden owl Bubo, companion of the goddess Athena! Seriously!? What the hell!?
This has gone down as one of my worst movies of the decade, and not even so bad it's good! Am glad that I didn't waste my hard earned money on the 3D version!
Tweaked from animations stop-motion legend Ray Harryhausen's 1981 original, Louis Leterrier's self-consciously kitsch retread of Clash of the Titans is a historically frustrating, distractingly murky 3D, hammed up story of determination and courage.
In this simplified version, the world of the gods has three main rulers each with its realm. Zeus (Liam Neeson) controls the heavens, Poseidon (Danny Huston) the sea and Hades (Ralph Fiennes) the underworld. Creating mankind in their image, the immortals of Olympus feed of the preys and devotion of their mortal subjects'.
As mankind develop however, they become disillusioned with the gods and reject their divine linage. Enraged by this betrayal, Zeus decides to teach his petulant children a lesson by inviting his twisted brother Hades to exact revenge and instil fear.
Rescued as a baby from a coffin at sea, Perseus (Sam Worthington) is lovingly raised by his adoptive fisherman father, Sypros (Pete Postlethwaite). Caught in one of the gods' fits of wrath, Perseus family is killed. Retrieved by soldiers, Perseus is brought to the city of Argos; the home of the human revolt against the gods.
The royals of Argos host a party for their returning soldiers to revealing in their distension. Ceasing the opportunity, Hades materialises and informs the humans of Zeus plans to eradicate them.
Feeding his underlying plot to overthrow his brother, Hades posing as mankind's unlikely saviour, offers a bargain. All may be spared a ghastly death by the fearsome sea-dwelling mega-monster The Kraken if they give him chosen sacrifice, Princess Andromeda (Alexa Davalos).
Offering 10 days for consideration Hades departs, but not before laying waste to the soldiers. However, when confronted by inadvertent resistance by Perseus, both Zeus and the humans realise Perseus is in-fact a demi-god.
The bastard child of Zeus, Perseus is informed that he lone is the saviour of mankind.
With a small band of Argos Warriors (Mads Mikkelsen, Liam Cunningham, Hans Matheson and Nicholas Hoult), and the assistance of ethereal spirit guide Io (Gemma Andromeda), Perseus sets out on a quest to find three cannibalistic crones, the Stygain Witches, who hold the answer to defeating The Kraken.
Their treacherous journey sees them confronted by giant scorpions, magical desert inhabitants Djinns, the venomous writhing beauty Medusa (Natalia Vodianova) and their reluctant leader's fear of immortal assistance.
Shot normally then twiddled as an afterthought, the muted popup book 3D adaptation offers little to enhance histories rich story. Cobbled from numerous sources, the anaemic material, stilted dialogue, confusing pacing and brutal editing gives way to glam rock costumes, misused lens flares and a decidedly PS3/XBOX vibe.
Jumping straight from the back of Avatar's flying dragon to Pegasus the winged black stallion, Sam's sexy scowl, generationally challenged Grecian buzz cut and overtly Australian everyman appeal brings something to this character.
From the charismatic dreadlock-clad Danish Mads Mikkelsen, to the menacingly raspy-voiced hunched-backed Ralph Fiennes, the army of serious acting talent simply doesn't get enough screen time. Often relegated to the background as fleeting extras, viewers are left wishing, if only they had the time would it have been better with fully fleshed out characters?
The Verdict: Although some shots look like a camp rip off of the 90's TV series Hercules, this well-warn behemoth tale is being brought to life and out of the screen for yet another generation; Lets just hope they pick up a book to get the full gist.
Published: The Queanbeyan Age
Date of Publication: 09/04/2010