Conan the Barbarian - Movie Reviews - Rotten Tomatoes

Conan the Barbarian Reviews

Page 2 of 8
Tim Brayton
Antagony & Ecstasy
August 26, 2011
Comes across as though it has a vendetta against its own target audience.... watching the film is, albeit in a small way, kind of like being punished for enjoying barbarian films.
Full Review | Original Score: 3/10
Matt Brunson
Creative Loafing
August 26, 2011
A humorless endurance test from the director who previously desecrated horror staples both good (The Texas Chain Saw Massacre) and bad (Friday the 13th) with so-what? remakes, this Conan fails in practically every respect.
Full Review | Original Score: 1/4
Marc Savlov
Austin Chronicle
August 26, 2011
Marcus Nispel takes on John Milius' epic testosterone orgy and provides gallons upon gallons of CGI gore and Frank Frazetta-esque backgrounds but precious little of the humanity (yes, I said humanity) of the 1982 Schwarzenegger original.
Full Review | Original Score: 1.5/5
August 26, 2011
While not lacking for lamentations from women or anybody else, primarily concentrates on the "crush your enemies" part. The movie fails because it can't make that gore interesting
Full Review | Original Score: 1.5/5
Jason Best
Movie Talk
August 26, 2011
A mix of limb-lopping mayhem and mystical mumbo-jumbo.
Alex Zane
The Sun (UK)
August 26, 2011
Disappointing.
Full Review | Original Score: 2/5
Graham Young
Birmingham Mail
August 26, 2011
I had to advise projection it was showing the film in the wrong ratio. Not that I missed much.
Full Review | Original Score: 2/5
Henry Fitzherbert
Daily Express (UK)
August 26, 2011
There's little satisfaction for the audience in this uninspired sword-and-sorcery adventure...
Full Review | Original Score: 2/5
Derek Malcolm
London Evening Standard
August 26, 2011
It's like an expensive B-movie that makes a lot of noise but signifies absolutely nothing.
| Original Score: 2/5
James Wright
Little White Lies
August 26, 2011
A missed chance. There's a good foundation to build on, but the immediate film is let down by a lacklustre story and god-awful script.
Full Review | Original Score: 2/5
Jonathan W. Hickman
Paste Magazine
August 26, 2011
Fourteen-year-old boys will wriggle with glee as Conan cuts down his opponents with his Cimmerian steel blade and manhandles bare-breasted women by the gaggle.
Full Review | Original Score: 5/10
Christopher Tookey
Daily Mail (UK)
August 25, 2011
This is the first film about medieval barbarians that appears actually to have been made by them.
Full Review | Original Score: 0/5
Ed Gibbs
Sydney Morning Herald
August 25, 2011
A respectable (if unnecessary) reboot that's brutal, well acted and not overly serious.
Full Review | Original Score: 6/10
MaryAnn Johanson
Flick Filosopher
August 25, 2011
Born on a battlefield! Blood blood blood! Bone crunching! Burn burn burn! In 3D!
Tim Robey
Daily Telegraph (UK)
August 25, 2011
The fault lies mainly with Marcus Nispel, German music-video director turned specialist in useless genre remakes, and not a man to whom any sane producer would entrust 3D.
Full Review | Original Score: 1/5
Tim Evans
Sky Movies
August 25, 2011
A perfectly enjoyable - if bloody - sword'n'sandals set-to.
Full Review | Original Score: 3/5
Karen Krizanovich
Radio Times
August 25, 2011
Low-quality entertainment with only surface polish.
Full Review | Original Score: 2/5
Chris Bumbray
JoBlo's Movie Emporium
August 24, 2011
Gory but pedestrian reboot.
Full Review | Original Score: 5/10
Matthew Turner
ViewLondon
August 24, 2011
Watchable sword and sorcery saga, enlivened by superb special effects sequences and some solid performances, though it's also a good twenty minutes too long and hampered by both a lack of humour and some dodgy dialogue.
Full Review | Original Score: 3/5
Xan Brooks
Guardian
August 24, 2011
Here is a tale in which battle sequence spawns battle sequence and where the dialogue is rendered all-but unintelligible under the din of clashing steel and the screams of the mutilated.
Full Review | Original Score: 2/5
Page 2 of 8