The Curse of the Jade Scorpion - Movie Reviews - Rotten Tomatoes

The Curse of the Jade Scorpion Reviews

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September 8, 2016
I know a lot of people will this one is corny . It was actually a pretty fun movie to watch
May 19, 2016
Grows on you. Script takes a few clever turns that keeps the story rolling. Had a good time and quite a few laughs with non stop witty dialog.
February 3, 2016
Ceaseless jabbering was in fact so very annoying.
½ January 21, 2016
Hilarious and pretty old school, writing wise, for Woody.
½ November 8, 2015
She seems a little demented; but hey, in a hotel room that could be fun.

An insurance detective has a love/hate relationship with an office employee that is having an affair with the owner of the company. A sultry super hottie at the office is sleeping with the detective. The company goes to a hypnotist and the love/hate couple is called to the stage. They are given the Jade Scorpion Curse and the hypnotist uses them to execute jewelry heists through hypnosis. A strange love story unfolds.

"My fiancé wouldn't appreciate that."
"Which one?"

Woody Allen, director of Midnight in Paris, Annie Hall, Scoop, Match Point, Mighty Aphrodite, Alice, Shadow and Fog, Radio Days, and September, delivers Curse of the Jade Scorpion. The storyline for this movie is entertaining with some unique characters, but a bit cheesy and bland. The acting is solid and the cast includes Woody Allen, Helen Hunt, Elizabeth Berkley, John Schuck, and John Tormey.

"You're going to take your word over mine?"

I came across this on cable and had to DVR it. This was interesting and fun to watch unfold, but far from one of the better Allen movies. I recommend seeing this if you're a fan of Allen films.

"Never bet on a horse that has Parkinson's."

Grade: C
½ September 9, 2015
By no means is it Woody Allen's funniest or most memorable comedy, but it's enjoyable enough that it doesn't wear out its welcome.
August 26, 2015
With a strong start & hopeful plot it's a shame this film tanked in its second half. The story of Insurance Investigator (Woody Allen) cooping with a new female boss & a tough new case.

Unknowingly he is actually hypnotized by a master criminal & it is fact that he that is the jewel thief.

There is some great dialogue here & there but the mid way gets really uneven & looses momentum. It's overall an enjoyable film but lacks something.
January 20, 2015
No pensè que fuese tan hilarante, Woody Allen en su mejor forma, està a la altura de sus mejores comedias Manhatthan Murder Mistery y Bullets over Broadway.
December 31, 2014
I like the wisecracks but that's all
½ October 3, 2014
Review:
This is another average movie from Woody Allen, about a man and woman who get hypnotised to steal jewellery. The man works for a insurance company, who investigates claims, and the lady has been hired to save money for the company. The jokes weren't that funny and the storyline seemed far fetched. The whole movie was set around the 1940's and the director done well to portray the period well, but I couldn't take Woody Allen's annoying one liners which are typical from some of his earlier work. The chemistry between Helen Hunt and Allen was watchable and it was good to see Dan Akroyd as the head of the company, but the whole movie seemed to drag after a while and I must admit, I did struggle to stay awake. On the plus side, I liked the whole Woody Allen as a 1940's detective concept, but it was the storyline that let the movie down. Average!

Round-Up:
I'm still struggling to find Woody Allen's movies that funny, but I'm determined to find out why everyone wants to work with him. He does have a unique style of writing and his love for New York and troubled relationships, do work in some of his earlier projects, but I personally find his movies more entertaining when he isn't rambling on. I must admit, he always gets a brilliant cast and he does bring the best out of actors/actresses and his latest projects like the Blue Jasmine and Whatever Works were a great watch. It just seems like he lost his touch during the 90's. Anyway, I've still got quite a few Woody Allen movies on my rental list, so fingers crossed.

Budget: $33million
Worldwide Gross: $19million (Flop!)

I recommend this movie to people who are into there Woody Allen movies about a man and woman who get hypnotised to rob expensive jewellery. 3\10 
June 3, 2014
one allen's better later efforts
½ March 19, 2014
Woody Allen admits this is not his best work. The problem stems from the performances really. It is a decent idea, a somewhat funny script...but Allen miscast himself as the lead, and his chemistry with Helen Hunt is terrible. She is no Keaton or Farrow. The style is there in this neo-norish comedy about insurance adjusters, hypnosis, and jewel thievery...but the misplaced lead in Allen, his miscast love interest in Hunt, and the hit and miss performance from Aykroyd make this one a hard one to recommend.
March 10, 2014
The Curse of the Jade Scorpion sounded good on the surface because it had Woody Allen combining elements of noir and comedy into one film, and as usual it was lined up with a talented cast.

The Curse of the Jade Scorpion fails to feature one of Woody Allen's better screenplays. The dialogue doesn't seem intelligent or believable, but rather simply full of a lot of generic Woody Allen language elements without any of his good ones. It's a basic one and isn't that bad, but it doesn't match up to the quality expected of the man who has been nominated 16 times for the Academy Award for Best Original Screenplay, more times than any other person in existence. That includes 4 wins.
And second of all, the story lacks originality or creativity. It loosely follows a single plotline while also being jam packed with too many characters for its own good, so the focus of the viewer is likely to be lesser than the actual focus of the film which itself is pretty poor. The story constantly finds itself getting distracted by too many characters and subplots. Since The Curse of the Jade Scorpion is Woody Allen's biggest budgeted film, it seems like he had a lot he intended to do with $26 million which he failed to turn into a good story or intelligent script in lieu of colourful visual elements thanks to his style of filmmaking. Honestly, The Curse of the Jade Scorpion is quite a vain project and cannot be looked upon as one of The Curse of the Jade Scorpion but instead as an example of his early to mid 2000's career slump.
The Curse of the Jade Scorpion is essentially a routine comedy from Woody Allen, and so it isn't clever or funny. But also for one that intended to be a homage to film noir, it barely touches upon it. The costumes are the only elements that really do it, as well as the musical score bringing a light touch to it. But ever other element of it feels way too modern such as cinematography, language and production design. No matter what Woody Allen intended, guessing the noir element of The Curse of the Jade Scorpion is too difficult to identify and so why Woody Allen even bothered is just senseless. Woody Allen is really not able to construct a good film out of The Curse of the Jade Scorpion regardless of his good intentions, and he doesn't really succeed in any area which is a shame as he is the writer, director and actor in the film all at once.
Woody Allen's performance is a routine one unfortunately. Although it seems as if his protagonist character is inspired by the sophisticated Humphrey Bogart, instead of combining his charm with the usual Woody Allen neuroticism he instead just plays Woody Allen in a suit and hat. It succeeds as much as Woody Allen's bare minimum effort really can, and while his performance is confident and dedicated, it is nothing new and not one to be enthusiastic about. His performance fails to reach up to the quality of his performance in the 1972 romantic comedy-drama Play it Again, Sam where similar elements were touched upon but felt more original than they do when falling back into The Curse of the Jade Scorpion. At least he is able to acknowledge that casting himself in the lead role was a seriously bad flaw for the film.
But thankfully, the rest of the cast prove to give more refreshing performances.
Helen Hunt's lead performance in The Curse of the Jade Scorpion manages to keep things together. As female protagonists in Woody Allen films always tend to be interesting, it is always required that the actress be up to par in holding a lot of talent. Helen Hunt shows off that exact talent which a few years prior had won her the Academy Award for Best Actress. Her performance combines an energetic physicality with a passionate line delivery, and her chemistry with Woody Allen manages to brighten the dull mood of the film a bit at times. Helen Hunt's talent for playing a lead actress manages to make The Curse of the Jade Scorpion better than it could have been without her, and so there is flaw in casting her.
Charlize Theron's seductive performance is both ripe with visual sex appeal and the line delivery of a sexy Hollywood legend like Rita Hayworth. While her career had yet to take off at the time she made The Curse of the Jade Scorpion, it is undeniable that her talented effort is a memorable one.
Dan Akroyd's performance is somewhat routine, but his charm is plenty sophisticated so it brings energy to The Curse of the Jade Scorpion and gives him a platform to remind us of the talents he has as an actor which made him a hit in the 1980's and scored him an Academy Award nomination for Driving Miss Daisy in 1989. His presence is a genial one.
I was also happy to see Elizabeth Berkley's name on the credits in The Curse of the Jade Scorpion because although she is considered less of an actress and more of a joke for her performance in the 1995 failed blockbuster Showgirls, Woody Allen tends to be able to bring out the best in everybody. And so for Elizabeth Berkley to be presented with such an opportunity in a supporting role she finds herself showing her true acting talent in a restrained performance where she looks too different from Nomi Malone in Showgirls for many people to make notable comparisons, and her brief screentime manages to prove effective.
So The Curse of the Jade Scorpion is not a good film. It is a routine comedy which does too little with a budget that is too big for Woody Allen to know what to do with, so it ends up as a vain and unoriginal project which is unfunny and just plain scattered.
February 10, 2014
A easily overlooked Woody Allen comedy. A nostalgic detective story mixed with Woody's philosophy of life, love and sex. May not be his best work of course but still pretty enjoyable.
November 20, 2013
not as sharp as usual,but enjoyed and laughed at the second part of it.
September 28, 2013
This film got some really bad reviews when it came out, but to be honest I really enjoyed it! being the second film from Woody Allen I ever watched, I thought it was a funny comedy set in a great era, with beautiful costumes, funny situations as always & an awesome cast. Maybe not his greatest film but still a nice entertainment....
May 1, 2013
Kind of a lil fun, but nothing special... At least it was not long...
½ April 28, 2013
Not one of Woody Allen's best. He's so prolific though that these misses are bound to happen relatively frequently.
April 17, 2013
Armed with a deal at DreamWorks Pictures, Woody Allen creates an enjoyable homage to the old detective films of the 1940's, as well as the fast-talking screwball comedies of that era as well. Woody claims this one is his worst film because he cast himself in the lead when no-one else was available, but he couldn't be more wrong, it's a very enjoyable film with some good laughs along the way. Insurance investigator CW Briggs (Woody) is non-plussed at having the office where he works at being re-arranged by efficiancy expert Betty Ann Fitzgerald (Helen Hunt), despite his boss Chris Magruder (Dan Aykroyd) calling for peace and harmony. However, at a party, they're both hypnotized by a criminal hypnotist The Great Voltan (David Ogden Stiers), who after the show is finished, telephones Briggs and has him carry out jewel heists on estates for which he designed the security systems for, but after each crime, Briggs has no memory of having carried out the crimes, and can't figure out what's happened, until he's caught in the act. It's a light and breezy film, not Woody's best film but far from his worst. He does good with recreating the look of New York in 1940, and one saving grace is the brilliant soundtrack of jazz songs and has a good supporting cast, including Wallace Shawn, Elizabeth Berkley and Charlize Theron.

Woody Allen creates an enjoyable homage to the old detective films of the 1940's, as well as the fast-talking screwball comedies of that era as well. Woody plays insurance investigator CW Briggs, who is non-plussed at having the office where he works at being re-arranged by efficiancy expert Betty Ann Fitzgerald (Helen Hunt), however, at a party, they're both hypnotized by a criminal hypnotist The Great Voltan (David Ogden Stiers), who after the show is finished, telephones Briggs and has him carry out jewel heists on estates for which he designed the security systems for. It's a light and breezy film, not Woody's best film but far from his worst. He does good with recreating the look of New York in 1940, and has a good supporting cast, including Dan Aykroyd, Elizabeth Berkley and Charlize Theron.
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