Grown Ups - Movie Quotes - Rotten Tomatoes

Grown Ups Quotes

  • Gloria: Like when Rob snapped at me the other day, that was scary. And you all thought I was so calm, but inside I was saying "Gloria Nunen, do not call him a bug-eyed sociopath with a little man complex. Do not say that his hair makes him look like a dirty q-tip. Or that he resembles an older, gay Jonas Brother. Or a midget, Filipino Fonzi.
    Gloria: Like when Rob snapped at me the other day, that was scary. And you all thought I was so calm, but inside I was saying Gloria Nunen, do not call him a bug-eyed sociopath with a little man complex. Do not say that his hair makes him look like a dirty q-tip. Or that he resembles an older, gay Jonas Brother. Or a midget, Filipino Fonzi.


  • Gloria: I have a confession to make too. I'm really a man.


  • Kurt McKenzie: I see that ass is still growing. Got a little Kardashian in there.


  • Lenny Feder: Are you peeing or is a diesel truck turning off? What the hell is that?


  • Kurt McKenzie: You got toe.


  • Kurt McKenzie: How in the world's anybody supposed to get some sleep knowing they're under the same roof as Toe-be Bryant over here?


  • Marcus Higgins: Can you have sex with them when they're pregnant?
    Lenny Feder: Well, McKenzie can because the baby thinks it's getting a Tootsie roll.


  • Marcus Higgins: Can you have sex with them when they're pregnant?


  • Deanne McKenzie: Everything was on steroids except for his voice.


  • Water Park Stud: Hoseteasers.


  • Deanne McKenzie: That's not my belly, that's my boob.


  • Mama Ronzoni: Deanne, you should have married that Italian guy like I told you.
    Deanne McKenzie: Yeah and if I did, you'd be the one who's pregnant right now.
    Mama Ronzoni: You're probably right. I'll butt out now.


  • Roxanne Chase-Feder: That's what men do. They take and take, and then give you up for some cow.


  • Donna Lamonsoff: Are you making a sissy? You know they make a chemical that turns urine blue.


  • Deanne McKenzie: How about I take you out for a date night every Thursday?
    Kurt McKenzie: Well, Thursday night is Grey's Anatomy, but any other night would be great.


  • Lenny Feder: Where is Sascatchatoon?


  • Marcus Higgins: Hey, what's up, Lenny? Buddy, I thought you were gonna start working out.
    Lenny Feder: What does that mean?
    Marcus Higgins: Um... you're fat.


  • Eric Lamonsoff: Witch I would do is hide the candy inside my pants... Luckily the smell of my BO matched the smell of the candy
    Eric Lamonsoff: Witch I would do is hide the candy inside my pants... Luckily the smell of my BO matched the smell of the candy.
    Lenny Feder: Ya, and the poo stains matched the colour of the chocolate
    Lenny Feder: Ya, and the poo stains matched the color of the chocolate.


  • Becky Feder: I wanna get chocolate wasted!


  • Keithie Feder: What's this big box on the back of the tv?


  • Robideaux: (Dog Barking) What the hell is that? Sounds like owls having sex.
    Robideaux: [dog Barking] What the hell is that? Sounds like owls having sex.


  • Rob Hilliard: Hey. Come Here, Come Here.
    Rob Hilliard: Don't fall for that crap. You stay away from him.
    Jasmine Hilliard: What are you talking about? He's gay isn't he?
    Rob Hilliard: No. He just seems gay. He's a genius.


  • Milk Kid: Mommy I want some of her milk
    Milk Kid: Mommy, I want some milk.


  • Andre McKenzie: I wanna get wasted!
    Charlotte McKenzie: I wanna get totally wasted!
    Becky Feder: I wanna get chocolate wasted!


  • Marcus Higgins: Listen to hamper bottom. I think he's sending a message in Morse code. Getting old. Stop. Can't pee. Stop. Reek like an asparagus. Stop. Even though I didn't have any. Stop.
    Marcus Higgins: Listen to hamper bottom. I think he's sending a message in Morse code. Getting old. Stop. Can't pee. Stop. Reek like an asparagus. Stop. Even though I didn't have any. Stop.


  • Becky Feder: [about the bug zapper] Daddy! Where is it taking them?
    Marcus Higgins: ...Hell.
    Marcus Higgins: Hell.
    Lenny Feder: Higgins. Don't say that.
    Marcus Higgins: Oh I'm sorry not Hell... Mexico.


  • Roxanne Chase-Feder: That was a man's ass?


  • Roxanne Chase-Feder: and that must be your mother
    Roxanne Chase-Feder: [an old woman approaches them] And this must be your mother.
    Rob Hilliard: it's my wife
    Rob Hilliard: My wife.
    Roxanne Chase-Feder: oh i love ur scarf (awkward!)
    Roxanne Chase-Feder: I'm sorry!


  • Marcus Higgins: Kurt: He calls it maize because it sounds mystical Rob: It's great Marcus: It's a-maize-ing
    Kurt McKenzie: He calls it maize because it sounds mystical.
    Rob Hilliard: It's great.
    Lenny Feder: It's a-maize-ing.


  • Lenny Feder: Good to see you drove your piggy bank herem
    Lenny Feder: It's nice you drove your piggy bank here!


  • Gloria: Life can be difficult sometimes, it gets bumpy. What with family and kids and things not going exactly like you planed. But that's what makes it interesting. In life the first act is always exciting. The second act... that is where the depth comes in.


  • Lenny Feder: We needed to be here. Our kids were turning into snotty, spoiled, little. This is what we needed.


Find More Movie Quotes