Hardbodies - Movie Reviews - Rotten Tomatoes

Hardbodies Reviews

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March 18, 2017
A few fiends are in it so maybe I'll check it out
September 28, 2016
3 middle aged men rent a beach house and hire a young stud to teach them how to "dialogue" local hardbodies. Enlightening and enriching film that taught me about the BBD - the bigger and better deal. Works where others in the genre fail in that the main character, Scotty, is often likable. Bonus is a cameo from all girl metal band Vixen.
½ July 24, 2016
This might be the trashiest movie ever. The plot is simply old dudes want to sleep with young girls and hire a surfer to help. Tonnes of nudity and zero conflict, but there's lots of partying and boobs so if you want sex comedy antics this is amazing!
June 13, 2016
Middle aged men go to the beach for surf and sex in this typical 80s sex romp.
½ September 22, 2015
( . )( . ) Trashy bikini cheesecake.
½ August 24, 2013
Pretty decent teen comedy film, but with a bit of a twist. Three of the lead cast are older guys looking for a way to get some on the beach, so the hire a young women magnet for help.

I won't lie for any guys reading this, nearly every women in the cast with lines shows skin. I don't think five minutes ever passed without truckloads of nudity on the screen. If you like boobs, this movie is for you!

As a horror genre fan mostly of this time, seeing a lot of alum show up here was a treat. The two lead guys are Killer Klowns' Grant Cramer and Children Of The Corn's Courtney Gains.
Darcy DeMoss, Kathleen Kinmont and Kane Hodder all show up in smaller roles too.

I actually thought the charm of Cramer is what made this film work. It was a good role as he never treated the women too badly, and his love story with the super gorgeous Teal Roberts worked nicely.

Music was nice 80's cheese too, but the theme song was a great as well as the final party song. Turns out 45 Grave's 'Partytime' was used in this film before it was made mostly famous for Return Of The Living Dead!
July 3, 2013
Hardbodies - Cinematic Masterpiece
This 1984 classic exceeds all expectations - the story never takes itself too seriously and holds up just as well today as the day it was made - this movie has a lot of good laughs and one liners - also, Steve Gold should have won an Academy Award for his portrayal of "Farnsey", a scene stealing, robe wearing, toupee loving womanizer who is introduced during the film's final act
½ January 23, 2013
Pointless fun 80's movie.
½ September 6, 2012
I have no idea how or why this came up on my Roku recommendations, although I thought it might provide some nostalgic, 1980s campy fun complete with gigantic boomboxes, roller skates, terrible fashions and even worse hairstyles. It wasn't fun. It's painful to watch three middle actors playing caricatures making complete asses of themselves. I was embarrassed for them just watching it. I gave it the extra half-star for all the shapely bare breasts, but this film proves that there is indeed "too much of a good thing." Just like gorging yourself on [insert food vice here], it just leaves you feeling indifferent at best, queasy at worst. I know movies like this are supposed to be fluff and aren't intended to provoke thought, but it didn't quite have to be so vapid and unsubstantial.
½ September 2, 2012
Its been many a year since I last saw this T & A romp and apparently I saw it alot more than I realized because not only could I quote the movie here and there I actually found myself singing the theme song.
Its the epitome of 80's sleeze in a purely fun way.
There were even a few surprises this time 'round:
Kane Hodder plays a small role called 'Older Geek' and he was a stunt coordinator.
Kathleen Kinmont plays a hot, hot skater.
And the song Party Time mostly known from Return of the Living Dead is in the film twice.
½ September 1, 2012
Great when your twelve and wanting to see boobs but terrible when you're forty one and have surfed the Internet
July 27, 2012
More of the classic 80's beach flicks. Oversexed teens with great bodies who will take it off under the flimsiest of pretenses fueled by surf, sun, and booze. Undersexed, left behind 'adults' seeking to recapture (or capture) their lost youth. All of this held together by an absurd premise and ridiculous coincidence that just has to be an afterthought to how many naked chicks can we pile in a single scene. I miss the 80's.
½ May 12, 2012
Stupidist film I ever wasted time on.
½ May 5, 2012
5/5/2012: Cheesy, sleazy 80's romp of a movie. Still pretty funny!
March 4, 2012
80's teen sex comdey with more naked women than plot..
½ February 8, 2012
Okay, it's T&A schlock, but at least its good schlock. It has a plot, some funny lines, great situations and is just all around fun. This was one of the first "naughty" movies I snuck a middle-of-the-night recording off HBO with the new family VCR (helps to be tech saavy, eh?) But hey, it was filmed locally... good excuse. But honestly this is one of the better movies in this genre, filled with hot women, likeable leads and acting you can actually watch and enjoy.
January 13, 2012
The quintessential 80's movie! It's been a long time since I've seen this one. So bad it's good. Lots of cheesy music, bad acting and of course, lots of boobs! Filmed in Hermosa Beach, CA. Looks great on Netflix HD.
January 10, 2012
Great 80's fun flick.
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