Idiocracy - Movie Quotes - Rotten Tomatoes

Idiocracy Quotes

The top Idiocracy quotes selected by the Rotten Tomatoes community. Login to submit a quote!

  • Woman at Carl's Jr.: Your kids are starving. Carl's Jr. believes no child should go hungry. You are an unfit mother. Your children will be placed in the custody of Carl's Jr. Carl's Jr., fuck you, I'm eating.
    ‐ Submitted by Jason H (3 years ago)

  • Secretary of Education: IQ Test: If you have 1 bucket with 2 gallons and 1 bucket with 4 gallons, how many buckets you got?
    ‐ Submitted by Andreas R (3 years ago)

  • Rita: You think Einstein walked around thinkin' everyone was a bunch of dumb shits?
    Pvt. Joe Bauers: Yeah... Hadn't thought of that.
    Rita: Now you know why he built that bomb.
    ‐ Submitted by Tomas K (3 years ago)

  • Pvt. Joe Bauers: You know, there was a time in this country when smart people were considered cool... well maybe not cool, but they did things like build ships and pyramids and they even went to the moon.
    ‐ Submitted by Jason H (4 years ago)

  • Secretary of Defense: Because Brawndo's got electrolytes.
    ‐ Submitted by Joseph B (4 years ago)

  • Pvt. Joe Bauers: Why me? Every time Metsler says, 'Lead, follow, or get out of the way,' I get out of the way.
    ‐ Submitted by Joseph B (4 years ago)

  • Doctor: Why come you got no tattoo?
    ‐ Submitted by Joseph B (4 years ago)

  • Guy at Costco: Welcome to Costco, I love you.
    ‐ Submitted by Carl M (4 years ago)

  • Frito: For the smartest guy in the world you're pretty dumb sometimes.
    ‐ Submitted by Dan P (4 years ago)

  • Narrator: The number one movie was called: Ass. And that's all it was for 90 mins. It won eight oscars that year including best screenplay.
    ‐ Submitted by Dan P (4 years ago)

  • Pvt. Joe Bauers: Man, I could really go for a Starbucks, y'know?
    Frito: I don't really think we have time for a handjob, Joe.
    ‐ Submitted by Brianna E (4 years ago)

  • Narrator: As the 21st century began, human evolution was at a turning point. Natural selection, the process by which the strongest, the smartest, the fastest, reproduced in greater numbers than the rest, a process which had once favored the noblest traits of man, now began to favor different traits. Most science fiction of the day predicted a future that was more civilized and more intelligent. But as time went on, things seemed to be heading in the opposite direction. A dumbing down. How did this happen? Evolution does not necessarily reward intelligence. With no natural predators to thin the herd, it began to simply reward those who reproduced the most, and left the intelligent to become an endangered species.
    ‐ Submitted by Brianna E (4 years ago)

  • Narrator: The years passed, mankind became stupider at a frightening rate. Some had high hopes the genetic engineering would correct this trend in evolution, but sadly the greatest minds and resources where focused on conquering hair loss and prolonging erections.
    ‐ Submitted by Brianna E (4 years ago)

  • President Camacho: Shit. I know shit's bad right now, with all that starving bullshit, and the dust storms, and we are running out of french fries and burrito coverings. But I got a solution.
    Congressman #1: That's what you said last time, dipshit!
    Congressman #2: Yeah, I got a solution, you're a dick! South Carolina, what's up!
    ‐ Submitted by Brianna E (4 years ago)

  • Doctor With Trashy Guy: Clevon is lucky to be alive. He attempted to jump a jet ski from a lake into a swimming pool and impaled his crotch on an iron gate. But thanks to advances in stem cell research and the fine work of Doctors Krinsky and Altschuler, he should regain full reproductive function again.
    Trashy Guy: [in the background] Get your hands off my junk!
    ‐ Submitted by Brianna E (4 years ago)

  • Frito: I can't believe you like money too. We should hang out.
    ‐ Submitted by Brianna E (4 years ago)

  • Frito: I like money.
    ‐ Submitted by Brianna E (4 years ago)

  • Doctor: Don't worry, scrote. There are plenty of 'tards out there living really kick-ass lives. My first wife was 'tarded. She's a pilot now.
    ‐ Submitted by Brianna E (4 years ago)

  • Guy at Costco: Welcome to Costco, I love you. Welcome to Costco, I love you. Welcome to Costco, I love you. Welcome to Costco, I love you.
    ‐ Submitted by Brianna E (4 years ago)

  • Officer Collins: [addressing military brass] You see, a pimp's love is very different from that of a square.
    ‐ Submitted by Brianna E (4 years ago)

  • Doctor: [laughs] Right, kick ass. Well, don't want to sound like a dick or nothin', but, ah... it says on your chart that you're fucked up. Ah, you talk like a fag, and your shit's all retarded. What I'd do, is just like... like... you know, like, you know what I mean, like..
    ‐ Submitted by Brianna E (4 years ago)

  • Narrator: Modern speech had degrated down to a mixture of slang, hillbilly, and grunts.
    ‐ Submitted by Peter M (4 years ago)

  • Pvt. Joe Bauers: ... And there was a time in this country, a long time ago, when reading wasn't just for fags and neither was writing. People wrote books and movies, movies that had stories so you cared whose ass it was and why it was farting, and I believe that time can come again!
    ‐ Submitted by Chris P (5 years ago)

  • Frito: Go away! 'Batin'!
    ‐ Submitted by Chris P (5 years ago)

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