Mary Poppins Returns
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No consensus yet.
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All Critics (9)
| Fresh (7)
| Rotten (2)
| DVD (4)
It will offend those who are offended by the very title; it will probably thrill those who take one look at the title and immediately want to see the film.
The results are uneven and occasionally mind-bogglingly bad (which is partly the point), but they're never what you'd call dull.
[B]izarre and funny and full of the good Jesus stuff that no one could argue with...
And what, pray tell, is the Big JC doing wasting his time helping Canadians?
The basic premise alone is worth the price of admission for this one.
Set in Ottawa, Canada, the title says it all really, and so the dance number interestingly comes as no surprise. Everything here is half baked, on purpose, and it loses steam in the second half. You will wonder how your mom and dad feel about what you are actually doing with the life provided you. Its that bad.
The Son of God brings retired Mexican wrestler El Santo out of retirement to fight vampires who prey exclusively on lesbians. Delivers a few chuckles and nicely absurd moments, but not that many more than you get from the title and a one line plot synopsis. Not terrible, surprisingly, but needed one more musical number to put it over the top.
From my "So Bad It's GOOD" list. This film is hilarious.
A musical dance number about the second coming, god talks to his son through a bowl of ice cream... uh, and Jesus teams up with the Mexican God of Wrestling to take out a a gang of lesbian vampires who walk around during the day with a second coating of grafted skin.
Bad. Terrible. Obscene. Low-Budget. There are so many hyperboles for this movie... and watching it amounts to yelling "What!?" at the TV every few minutes.
A batman style spinning screen transition with an image of Jesus on a cross, and the sound effect of "Jee-ssuuuuus!" A never ending clown-car filled van of Agnostic martial artists? All wrapped around a plot that so desperately wants to be a porn movie. Apparently, when all the actors are pretty much the directors closest friends, its hard to say "take your top off.", so basically its like a cheesy porn film without the porn... which, in some ways, is pretty refreshing.
Yeah. Jesus Christ Vampire Hunter. Wow, never seeing that again. But I'd never for a moment think that that would dissuade anyone from seeing a film like this... the premise is too absurd to pass up, nomatter how poorly done. Yet another fine example of cinematic rubbernecking.
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