Liar Liar - Movie Quotes - Rotten Tomatoes

Liar Liar Quotes

  • Fletcher Reede: The pen is blue!


  • Fletcher Reede: Great! I'll catch you around dikhead!


  • Fletcher Reede: (being angrily asked what his problem is by angry driver) I'm an inconsidered prick!
    Fletcher Reede: I'm an inconsiderate prick!


  • Fletcher Reede: I'm kicking my ass! DO YA MIND?!
    Fletcher Reede: I'm kicking my ass! Do ya mind?


  • Fletcher Reede: Here it goes, I sped, I followed too closely, I ran a stop sign, I almost hit a chevy, I sped some more, I failed to yield at a crosswalk, I sped some more, I changed lanes in the intersection, I changed lanes without signaling while running a red light, and speeding!!!
    Fletcher Reede: Here it goes, I sped, I followed too closely, I ran a stop sign, I almost hit a chevy, I sped some more, I failed to yield at a crosswalk, I sped some more, I changed lanes in the intersection, I changed lanes without signaling while running a red light, and speeding!


  • Fletcher Reede: I'm glad my gift could bring those two closer together. My plan to phase myself out is almost complete.


  • Jerry: Hey! Great gift dad!
    Fletcher Reede: Thanks son!


  • Fletcher Reede: You brought your kids to your divorce?
    Samantha Cole: Sympathy.
    Fletcher Reede: Well, it's working. I feel sorry for them already.


  • Jerry: I'm so crooked that I have to screw my pants on when I get dressed in the morning.


  • Fletcher Reede: Your Honor, I Object!
    Fletcher Reede: Your honor, I object!


  • Fletcher Reede: STOP BREAKIN' THE LAW, ***HOLE!


  • Miranda: That was incredible! Was it good for you?
    Fletcher Reede: I've had better.
    Miranda: (angrily throws him out of office)
    Miranda: [angrily throws him out of office]
    Fletcher Reede: I've had BETTER????
    Fletcher Reede: I've had BETTER?


  • Fletcher Reede: Hi. New in the building?
    Woman in the Elevator: Oh yeah, I just moved in Monday.
    Fletcher Reede: Oh! You like it so far?
    Woman in the Elevator: Mmmhmm. Everybody's been real nice.
    Fletcher Reede: Well, It's cause you have big jugs. I mean your boobs are huge! I mean, I wanna squeeze em'! OH! Mama! (smoochie noises)
    Fletcher Reede: Well, It's cause you have big jugs. I mean your boobs are huge! I mean, I wanna squeeze em'! OH! Mama! [smoochie noises]
    Woman in the Elevator: (smacks his head hard)
    Woman in the Elevator: [smacks his head hard]


  • Jerry: I hold myself in contempt!
    Fletcher Reede: I hold myself in contempt!


  • Jerry: The pen is blue! The God damn pen is blue!
    Jerry: The pen is blue, the pen is blue, the goddamn pen is blue!
    Fletcher Reede: The pen is blue, the pen is blue, the goddamn pen is blue!


Find More Movie Quotes