Order of the Black Eagle - Movie Reviews - Rotten Tomatoes

Order of the Black Eagle Reviews

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December 31, 2013
Hilariously awful James Bond wannabe that is so bad it's good. Ian Hunter is a super spy (with a receding hairline) for sets out to stop a group of Nazi's and a cryogenically preserved Adolph Hitler in South America. The head Nazi has a terrible dye job and an eye patch, at looks uncannily like someone form Austin Powers. I also liked that nearly every background Nazi appeared to be some overweight schlub (not exactly the master race). It's really a zero star film, but it get's one star for ironic entertainment value. Oh, and I forgot to mention the James Bond figure has a pet baboon who follows him around and provides comic relief and at one point driving military hardware. And it also tries to become a spaghetti western for a few minutes.
½ April 28, 2013
95%

-They said it couldn't happen again-

Midnight goodness.
November 11, 2012
80's Cheese at its very best. Gets one star cause it has a monkey in it.
September 16, 2012
Machinegun ninjas, motocross nazis, baboons, and a frozen hitler in a tube! Probably the best action movie ever.
½ August 16, 2012
This movie is so bad that it's good. If you're looking for the cheesiest, nonsensical, low quality action movie of the 80s, check this out.
½ August 13, 2011
Okay I'll give it another half-star, but only because it's so stupid that it's funny. First off the hero looks like a Michael Bolton impersonator with a delivery so wooden you could build a boat out of it. Second, it takes 1980's action cheese to new heights. Third, it doesn't even pretend to be credible. Even for a parody of 80's spy movies.
April 9, 2011
@ two * I have over rated this movie. Hacky & bad but it sure is amusing for the most part. A James Bond rip off where our hero has a baboon side kick who wears a tux & chips into the fighting where need be. He even drives a tank! Our secrete agent must stop some Nazis in South America who have a proton beam & have Hitler cryogenically frozen. It's terrible but it entertains for those who like em this way. They climax is bravo though w/ lots of explosions make for some short comings. As well I loved when the main villain has or hero @ his mercy & tells him how to disarm the proton beam because he figures there was no way he was going to stop him. Hilarious. Biggest down fall - no nudity. A film this cheesy should have some
½ March 22, 2011
Another film that pretty much had me scratching my head. It was crazy enough to keep me watching... but boy was it crazy. I'm a little confused as to what the writers were actually trying to GO for. It almost seems to me like the writers wanted to do a movie about a spy, but they knew that it would probably come across as a James Bond-ripoff. So, since they knew they couldn't escape that, they marketed the movie AS such (a James Bond parody) and threw in a couple 'pokes' at the Bond franchise, but other than that, created an original-ish storyline. This will make absolutely no sense but I'm going to say it anyway: The movie was too not-funny to be a spoof, but too silly to be a serious movie. They tried to make it funny, but the comedy they went for wasn't a traditional spoof type of humor, it was more of a regular movie humor (for the most part).

But.... But... But then you have a baboon driving a tank? And suddenly you're completely confused. To death. What the heck am I watching???

The film's premise is interesting enough in that it involves resurgent Nazis who have somehow preserved Hitler in cryogenic stasis and are preparing to revive him. This alone kept me interested because I was hoping this would mean he WOULD be revived and we'd get to see some kind of fight between him and Duncan Jax (the main character)...

Let's just say I was very disappointed.


Strange strange STRANGE movie. Ever.
½ July 29, 2010
It doesn't surprise me that I'm one of the first people to review "Order of the Black Eagle", considering that I discovered the movie when my On Demand saved programs list claimed that I had watched one minute of it. My friends and I, being huge fans of terrible movies, watched it alongside with the horrendous "Manos: The Hands of Fate". ("Manos" being far worse than "Order")

"Order" is your typical Bond rip-off, perhaps gaining inspiration from "Never Say Never Again" with their use of a lame, balding 40-something Super Spy named Duncan Jax as the main protagonist. We first meet Jax unsuccessfully attempting a diamond heist. (Before I watched this film, I was unaware that evil villains typically hid precious jewels in abandoned office space.) Naturally, Jax is foiled by the bad guys, and he kills several of them before escaping to the top of the heavily unguarded complex and escaping in an experimental aircraft with his pet Baboon. Yes, it's that kind of movie. It is worth noting that this sequence has nothing to do with any other aspect of the film.
Jax lands in the middle of some stuffy dinner party that is happening in front of the secret spy-mansion for no apparent reason and proceeds to meet with the old "M" clone, who introduces Jax to the "Q" clone (however, this Q is far younger and also Asian) who then shows off his uninspired gadgets, which are rarely used again throughout the rest of the film.

Apparently, the remnants of the Nazi army have been keeping Hitler alive for the past 5 decades. This army, named after the real life "Order of the Black Eagle", is lead by a bloated one-eyed Orson Welles lookalike, who is able to eat the same full turkey for what seems like hours while his army is being obliterated. Duncan Jax teams up with the painfully innocent blonde, who at first seems reluctant to be working with Jax before succumbing to his middle-aged swagger. She gets captured by the nazis, blah blah blah, exploding Nazi jungle motorcycle chase, blah blah blah.

Eventually Jax teams up with a rag-tag group of mercenaries. Given that the scene in which this team is introduced is one of the funniest moments of this film, I won't give away any of their skills or "specialties". I will admit that "Juice" was my personal favorite out of all of them, mostly because he reminded me of a cross between Arnold Schwarzenegger's character in "Predator" and John Reynold's Torgo from the aforementioned "Manos: The Hands of Fate".
The film ends with a huge battle (hundreds of neo-nazis vs. eight or so people) that entails a baboon driving a tank, an infinite number of inexplicable distant explosions, and an imploding Hitler face.

I assume this film's budget was very low. During jungle scenes, the actors are clearly in woodland and the Nobel Prize awards are held in the same building where my junior high regional science fair was.

I'm not going to lie, this is an enjoyable film at times. A Hitler death scene similar to the one in the [way better] "Inglourious Basterds" and laughable action scenes make this a fun viewing with friends, perhaps when paired with "Troll 2", "The Room", "Manos" and other so-bad-they're-goods. My rating is based mostly on quality, though it gets an extra 10% for campy, dumb fun.
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