Paul - Movie Quotes - Rotten Tomatoes

Paul Quotes

  • Graeme Willy: How can I understand you; are you using some sort of neuro-language router?
    Paul: Or, maybe I'm speaking ENGLISH, you fucking idiot!
    Paul: Or, maybe I'm speaking English, you fucking idiot!

  • Graeme Willy: Why would Jesus want to shoot Charles Darwin?

  • Moses Buggs: Moses Buggs: The Good Lord is the only doctor she'll ever need. Agent Zoil: Copy that!
    Moses Buggs: The Good Lord is the only doctor she'll ever need.
    Agent Zoil: Copy that!

  • Graeme Willy: No, no he's not evil, he's just a bit rude.

  • Gus: You guys should of givin her four tits
    Graeme Willy: That's just sick!

  • Adam Shadowchild Fan: Can you sign my book?
    Adam Shadowchild: Did you write it?
    Adam Shadowchild Fan: No.
    Adam Shadowchild: Than fuck off.
    Adam Shadowchild: Then fuck off.

  • Paul: You'll know it when you see it.

  • Paul: Clive likes boning space bears!

  • Graeme Willy: Are you an alien?
    Paul: To you I am, yes.
    Graeme Willy: Are you gonna probe us
    Paul: Why does everyone always assume that, what am I doing? Am a harvesting farts?

  • Paul: yo fuck nuts,its probing time
    Paul: Yo fuck nuts, its probing time.

  • Agent Zoil: Three tits, that's awesome!

  • Paul: What's new, fatty?
    Clive Gollings: It's not fat, Paul, it's power. So rude!

  • Agent Zoil: Call me Lorenzo.
    Clive Gollings: Lorenzo Zoil?

  • Clive Gollings: There's a Alien in the back making bagels and coffee!
    Graeme Willy: Why you want tea?

  • Paul: It’s pretty strong shit, I got it from the military, actually. This is the stuff that killed Dylan.
    Paul: It?s pretty strong shit, I got it from the military, actually. This is the stuff that killed Dylan.
    Paul: It's pretty strong shit, I got it from the military, actually. This is the stuff that killed Dylan.
    Graeme Willy: Bob Dylan’s not dead.
    Graeme Willy: Bob Dylan?s not dead.
    Graeme Willy: Bob Dylan's not dead.
    Paul: Isn’t he?
    Paul: Isn't he?

  • Paul: I'm not gonna eat a DEAD bird, am I?

  • Clive Gollings: What if we wake up and find him inserting a probe into our ANUS?
    Graeme Willy: Apparently they don't do that.

  • Paul: Oh yeah! Then how do you explain me? (Coming out of the bathroom and making Ruth faint)
    Paul: Oh yeah! Then how do you explain me? [coming out of the bathroom and making Ruth faint]

  • Paul: Hello, I'm Paul. (Clive faints)
    Paul: Hello, I'm Paul. [Clive faints]

  • Paul: This is America; kidnapping a Christian? That's worse than harboring a fugitive!

  • Paul: I think we can all learn a lesson from this. Be yourself, speak from the heart, some shit like that.
    Paul: Well it's safe to say we've all learned something from this, be yourself, speak from your heart, some shit like that...

  • Paul: This ship takes off very fast, its a little awkward!!
    Paul: This spaceship takes off really slowly. It's a little awkward.

  • Agent Zoil: Nerds, huh?
    O'Reilly: Yes, they wen to Comic-Con. They met Adam Shadowchild.
    Agent Zoil: Who the hell's Adam Shadowchild?

  • Agent Zoil: Who the hell's Adam Shadowchild?
    Agent Zoil: Who the hell is Adam Shadowchild?

  • Clive Gollings: I'm starving...
    Clive Gollings: I'm starving.
    Paul: What's new, fatty?
    Clive Gollings: It's not fat, Paul, it's power. You're so rude...
    Clive Gollings: It's not fat, Paul. It's power. You're so rude.

  • Paul: Stoke the fire!

  • Clive Gollings: They are going to rape us and break our arms!
    Graeme Willy: I don't want my arms broke!

  • Clive Gollings: Get your own alien
    Clive Gollings: Get your own alien.

  • Paul: Clive likes boning space bears.
    Paul: [sings] Clive likes boning space bears!

  • Paul: Get your goddamn hands off my motherfuckin junk!!!
    Paul: [after getting frisked inappropriately by O'Reilly] Get your goddamn hands off my motherfuckin' junk!

  • Paul: I'm not gonna eat a dead bird, am I?

  • Graeme Willy: Are you gonna probe us?!
    Graeme Willy: Are you gonna probe us?
    Paul: Why does everyone always assume that?! What am I doing? harvesting farts?! How much can I learn from an ass?!

  • Paul: Why are we holding hands?
    Graeme Willy: So we look like a family. Just a couple of regular guys walking down the street...with a small cowboy.
    Graeme Willy: So we look like a family. We're just a couple of regular guys, walking down the street, with a small cowboy.
    Graeme Willy: So we look like a family. Just a couple of regular guys, walking down the street, with a small cowboy.

  • Robbed Woman: My Weed!!!!!!!
    Robbed Woman: My weed!

  • Paul: Yo Fuck nuts! It's Probing time!

  • Paul: It’s not like I set my phaser to faint!
    Paul: It's not like I set my phaser to faint!

  • Paul: "get your hand of my space junk"
    Paul: Get your hand of my space junk.

  • Graeme Willy: But your talking to us! Are you using some alien power to translate our languages so we can understand each other!?
    Paul: NO! IM SPEAKING FUCKING ENGLISH!!

  • Adam Shadowchild: Three tits? Awesome!

  • Ruth Buggs: Thank's Dick Milk

  • Graeme Willy: You are an alien!
    Paul: To you I am, yes.
    Graeme Willy: Are you gonna probe us?
    Paul: Why does everyone always assume that? What am I doing? Harvesting farts? How much can I learn from an ass?

  • Paul: [to two rednecks] Hey fucknuts! Probing time.

  • Paul: [Paul is posing on the couch as Graeme prepares to draw him] Are you gonna draw me like your French girls, Jack? [blows a kiss]

  • Paul: "Its probing time, fucknuts."
    Paul: It's probing time, fucknuts.

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