Another grandiose, hyperactive crock, full of lame jokes and gorgeous, stupefying images.
| Original Score: 2/4
All the necessary exposition prevents the picture from rising above your generic sand 'n' sandal adventure.
Russell lacks the visual panache, the comic touch, and perhaps the budget of Sommers's title-bout features.
Wimps out by going for that PG-13 rating, so the more graphic violence is mostly off-screen and the sexuality is muted.
The Scorpion King may look like a movie, but it feels like a food fight.
| Original Score: 1/5
A fairly by-the-books blend of action and romance with sprinklings of intentional and unintentional comedy.
| Original Score: 1.5/5
It feels very much like barbarian lite, which is to say, it's nothing special at all.
It's for moviegoers who like their pizzas with extra cheese.
Contains not a single good line or memorable action sequence.
It's fast-paced, filled with entertaining action set pieces from start to finish, and is genuinely funny in spots.
| Original Score: 2.5/4
Like every other action movie, it's designed for a 14-year-old boy's mentality, but it's enjoyable enough to turn most people into 14-year-old boys.
| Original Score: 3/4
One of those movies that catches you up in something bigger than yourself, namely, an archetypal desire to enjoy good trash every now and then.
Rock's got the kind of sly charm and non- self-conscious sincerity that could fit into any action hero archetype imaginable, even the old-school ones.
In its ragged, cheap and unassuming way, the movie works.
| Original Score: B
It's not hateful. It's simply stupid, irrelevant and deeply, truly, bottomlessly cynical.
| Original Score: 1/4
As an actor, The Rock is aptly named.
For a movie with such a misplaced sense of history, The Scorpion King seems afraid to have more fun with its own stupidity.
Mindless yet impressively lean spinoff of last summer's bloated effects fest The Mummy Returns.
Tries too hard to be hyper and not hard enough to be clever.
Russell ... stitches together a series of stunt sequences, giving as little time as possible to dialogue and character development.
Feels like a joyless piece of exploitation, punctuated with embarrassing, witless dialogue.
| Original Score: 1/4
A live-action cartoon, a fast-moving and cheerfully simplistic 88 minutes of exaggerated action put together with the preteen boy in mind.
| Original Score: 2/5
A fast-paced Ali Baba and the 40 Thieves adventure with enough cliffhanger escapes and peek-a-boo nudity to sate adolescent boys of all ages.
More entertaining than it has any right to be.
It's big, clever-dumb fun.
When it comes to muscle-bound action heroes, the Age of Arnie is definitely over. Give us another piece of The Rock.
| Original Score: 3/5
It's a fairly pedestrian adventure.
Big men with big muscles aren't what they used to be.
For all the money spent on The Scorpion King (roughly $60 million), mostly for CGI effects ... the movie lacks bite.
| Original Score: C+
The Rock's version of Conan the Barbarian -- a clunky, primitive platform for a star who has yet to get in full touch with his inner Terminator.