Spice World Reviews
So Spice World is about... oh screw it, THERE IS NO PLOT! Seriously, there's not even one shred of story in this awful excuse of a film. Every scene is just random and all the characters (especially The Spice Girls) are as flat as a freaking board. To put it simply, this movie is just an hour and 32 minute commercial for The Spice Girls. And when I say every scene is random, I mean it! There are Aliens, a Dance Boot Camp, A Pregnant friend, A Documentary subplot, a villainous Paparazzi guy, Roger Moore and lots of other elemnts that make no real sense and have no proper place in the film.
Of course, the acting is just awful. It doesn't matter if we're talking about the supporting characters or The Spice Girls themselves. No person in the cast even tries to give a decent performance let alone a good one. Still The Spice Girls take the cake on the whole "Can't Act" scale. Every time one or more of them opened their mouths I was in serious misery. They are just... IRRITATING!
I know what a lot of you are thinking, "Oh Brad, what were you expecting? It's a movie about The Spice Girls. This film was directed at Children and Pre-Teens". That is extreme Bull. I don't care what the aimed Demographic is, I don't care who stars in the movie or what the film's purpose is. You're still making a MOVIE! The whole Purpose of a movie is to ENTERTAIN PEOPLE! Spice Wrld has caused nothing but pain to me. Your movie doesn't have to be a reflective or deep movie but at the very least it should be given some kind of thought and it should have some kind of effort put into it. There is no passion or effort in Spice World.
And you know what? I don't have anything else to say about this movie. Yeah this might be the shortest review I've ever written, but I don't care to be honest. Spice World is just... STUPID. It has stupid writing, a stupid execution and a really stupid idea. I even hesitate to call Spice World a movie because it's just a really commercial and addition to a singing group that nobody remembers.
The film truly encompassed the decade of the 90's: the obsession of retro furniture (just take a look at the interior of that traveling, double-decker bus!), platform boots so high they could reach the stratosphere, healthy amounts of "girl power," and 'anything-goes' fashion ("could somebody please tell me exactly what the dress code is here?" one character remarks). The Spice Girls could have created a convoluted and overly-absorbing piece of cinematic self-promotion, (ie, the Monkees' film "Head,") but they have, instead, gone the more fun and carefree route by placing themselves in comic and embarrassing story-lite situations filled with fun, flair, and secret agents bottle-feeding baby piglets. My favorite sequence in when the girls are put through military training; each of the Spices don a green, unflattering camouflaged army outfit, except for Posh, who still retains her fashionable flash in a short, tight, army-patterned dress. It is silly to watch, sure, but I appreciate how the girls stay true to their public on-stage personas.
The upside and downside of Spice World is that its humor succeeds only half the time. While I believe taking the "campiness" out of the film would have been a major mistake, I also believe the film would have been much stronger as a whole if many jokes had been taken farther, instead of being cut halfway before reaching their humorous pinnacles. One such example is towards the end of the film when the British police stop the girls from reaching their concert at Albert Hall; Baby Spice approaches the officers with a pouty-puff display of innocence. Then... the scene cuts, and the girls (somehow) arrive unscathed to their concert a couple minutes later. If Baby Spice had gone farther in her pleas, (or if Ginger Spice had interfered by whacking the cops across their kissers,) I would have been more satisfied.
But despite the half-hearted attempt at many jokes, the far-fetched nature of the story disguised everything that did not work. I am annoyed by critics (both professional and amateur,) who give Spice World one star out of five. One star? Really? My personal rule-of-thumb is that one shouldn't call a film "cheesy and all-over-the-place" in a condescending manner if the film's intent was to present the world as being, well, cheesy and all-over-the-place. (Extra points to the alien encounter scene.) In all honest, I enjoyed the groovy and rockin' Spice World; while it did not ascend to the heights of A Hard Day's Night or Help, it is on-par with Herman's Hermits' musical comedies of the 60's.