The Guard - Movie Quotes - Rotten Tomatoes

The Guard Quotes

  • FBI agent Wendell Everett: You went to Disney World by yourself?
    Sergeant Gerry Boyle: Yeah, great gas it was! Had me picture taken with Goofy and everything. He's my favourite, Goofy!
    FBI agent Wendell Everett: You know I can't tell if you're really motherfuckin' dumb or really motherfuckin' smart.


  • Francis Sheehy: Let's get the fook outta here Clive!
    Clive Cornell: Kidding me? This is better than fucking Christmas!!
    Clive Cornell: Kidding me? This is better than fucking Christmas!


  • Sergeant Gerry Boyle: now I know what you w'er tinkin'... yer tinkin' those men are armed and dangerous... an' you, bein' an FBI Agent are more used to shooting unarmed women n' children-
    Sergeant Gerry Boyle: Now I know what you w'er tinkin'... yer tinkin' those men are armed and dangerous... an' you, bein' an FBI Agent are more used to shooting unarmed women n' children.
    FBI agent Wendell Everett: -The Fuck-?!
    FBI agent Wendell Everett: The fuck?!


  • Clive Cornell: Where the fuck did you find those men?
    Francis Sheehy: Uuuh... I put n' ad. in the paper sayin' 'Henchmen Wanted"
    Francis Sheehy: Uuuh... I put n' ad. in the paper sayin' 'Henchmen Wanted'.


  • Sergeant Gerry Boyle: What a beautiful fuckin' day!!
    Sergeant Gerry Boyle: What a beautiful fuckin' day!


  • Sergeant Gerry Boyle: I'm Irish, sir. Racism is part of my culture.


  • Sergeant Gerry Boyle: You lads always announce seizure of drugs worth a street value at $10 million or $20 million or half a billion dollars. I wonder what street it is you're buying your cocaine on, because it's not the same street as I'm buying my cocaine on.


  • Sergeant Gerry Boyle: Ever been shot?
    FBI agent Wendell Everett: Yeah
    FBI agent Wendell Everett: Yeah.
    Sergeant Gerry Boyle: Does it hurt?


  • Sergeant Gerry Boyle: Any kids?
    FBI agent Wendell Everett: Two boys. Stokely's five years old. Huey just turned three months old. I got a picture of him.
    Sergeant Gerry Boyle: I don't want to see it.
    FBI agent Wendell Everett: Excuse me?
    Sergeant Gerry Boyle: I don't want to see it. Babies all look the same. The only time a baby doesn't look like every other baby is when it's a really ugly baby. So, unless it's a photo of a really ugly baby, I don't want to see it.
    FBI agent Wendell Everett: Well, that's pretty fuckin' rude.
    Sergeant Gerry Boyle: Maybe it is, maybe it isn't.
    FBI agent Wendell Everett: Oh, it is!


  • FBI agent Wendell Everett: I don't know if you're really mutha-fuckin' smart... or really mutha-fuckin' dumb.


  • Sergeant Gerry Boyle: A fucking latte's my drink!!
    Sergeant Gerry Boyle: A fucking latte's my drink!


  • Sergeant Gerry Boyle: Hot whiskey, John-Joe, please. And a cold one while I'm waiting. Yourself?
    FBI agent Wendell Everett: Er, Guinness.
    Sergeant Gerry Boyle: Two Guinnesses as well, John-Joe. Like the fat man said, if you have to be careful not to drink too much, it's because you're not to be trusted when you do.


  • Sergeant Gerry Boyle: What a beautiful fuckin' day.


  • Sergeant Gerry Boyle: Chilly out, ha?


  • Sergeant Gerry Boyle: I'm Irish. Racism is part of me culture.
    Sergeant Gerry Boyle: I'm Irish, sir, racism is a part of me culture.
    Sergeant Gerry Boyle: I'm Irish, sure, racism is a part of me culture.


  • Sergeant Gerry Boyle: â??He probably hasn't had this much fun since they burnt all those kids at Waco.â??
    Sergeant Gerry Boyle: He probably hasn't had this much fun since they burned down those kids at Waco.
    Sergeant Gerry Boyle: He probably hasn't had this much fun since they burned all those kids at Waco.


  • Sergeant Gerry Boyle: I'll go slip into something a little less comfortable.


  • Sergeant Gerry Boyle: You lost me at 'we'.
    FBI agent Wendell Everett: We. You and I.
    Sergeant Gerry Boyle: It's my day off.


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