Underworld: Blood Wars Reviews

  • Apr 10, 2019

    This one was pretty bland

    This one was pretty bland

  • Apr 06, 2019

    This is bad. Original movie was an excellent action flick. Unfortunately it only went downhill from there. Slowly at first, but by fifth movie it is in free fall. Movie is horrible in almost every aspect, from writing to directing. There have been even several scenes that was obviously deemed to be "good enough" and reek of extremely low quality. Movie pacing and story is horrible. Selene power levels fluctuate enormously, from badass to complete whimp in matter of few minutes, only for her becoming badass again 10 minutes later. She can beat the living shit out of everyone at one point, just to be completely decimated few minutes later by fairly average character. And that is just one example. Whole movie is made in same manner, with many events having no logic or buildup to them. Final battle at the castle was particularly cringe. With lycans bringing in a cannon(?) to blow small, head-size, holes in what appears to be tinted glass. And it somehow completely destroys vampire resistance. WTF And all the crap about other world, or whatever was it name. Seriously, this was the weakest excuse to bring Selene back after being defeated. It is only rivaled by the fact how she managed to face Marius on almost equal terms and then somehow just get annihilated just a few minutes later, without taking much damage, all during same fight. Horrible. And they are actually making another one. Half a star for movie, another half for Kate.

    This is bad. Original movie was an excellent action flick. Unfortunately it only went downhill from there. Slowly at first, but by fifth movie it is in free fall. Movie is horrible in almost every aspect, from writing to directing. There have been even several scenes that was obviously deemed to be "good enough" and reek of extremely low quality. Movie pacing and story is horrible. Selene power levels fluctuate enormously, from badass to complete whimp in matter of few minutes, only for her becoming badass again 10 minutes later. She can beat the living shit out of everyone at one point, just to be completely decimated few minutes later by fairly average character. And that is just one example. Whole movie is made in same manner, with many events having no logic or buildup to them. Final battle at the castle was particularly cringe. With lycans bringing in a cannon(?) to blow small, head-size, holes in what appears to be tinted glass. And it somehow completely destroys vampire resistance. WTF And all the crap about other world, or whatever was it name. Seriously, this was the weakest excuse to bring Selene back after being defeated. It is only rivaled by the fact how she managed to face Marius on almost equal terms and then somehow just get annihilated just a few minutes later, without taking much damage, all during same fight. Horrible. And they are actually making another one. Half a star for movie, another half for Kate.

  • Mar 07, 2019

    Not quite as good as the others but still enjoyable definitely worth seeing

    Not quite as good as the others but still enjoyable definitely worth seeing

  • Jan 20, 2019

    The final chapter to this epic franchise certainly did not disappoint!

    The final chapter to this epic franchise certainly did not disappoint!

  • Jesse O Super Reviewer
    Jan 10, 2019

    So it looks like yesterday I was able to utilize a mobile hotspot to post the reviews on the sites that I post them on. If it holds up, this will be what I use for the next week or so as the appointment to have it fixed was made for next Friday. Funny thing about that is that we were informed by our provider that their people came to perform some improvements that, apparently, left us without service and a few other people as well. They didn't say this when they contacted us, I just mean that a neighbor's friend is going through the same thing. They don't say anything about coming to fix their mistake though, since it doesn't seem to be something on our end. Neither here nor there, I suppose. Just thought I should give you an update on the situation. So DVDs it is or borrowed DVDs at least. Hmmm, where do I start with the Underworld franchise??? I think it should be noted that Screen Gems, who distributed the franchise, also distributed the long-running Resident Evil franchise, another long-running female-lead action franchise. And, ultimately, I think both franchises suffer from the same problems. That major problem is and, in my opinion, I think Underworld suffers more from this, is the fact that every single one of the stories in these movies just start to blend together. As much as someone may love either of these franchises, you can't tell me that each installment is really all that different from one another deep down. The reason I say that Underworld is worse in this regard is because of the fact that the story, essentially, almost always involve some sort of battle between the lycans and the vampires. Every Underworld movie has the same visual style, you know the one, that bluish hue. You cannot tell any of these movies apart. Resident Evil, on the other hand, while still largely a terrible franchise, at least branched out and employed different visual styles while still, generally, dealing with the T-Virus and how it turns those who suffer from it into zombies. Underworld has looked and felt the same since its first installment came out in 2003. I was FIFTEEN fucking years old when the first movie came out, a movie that I saw in theaters with a couple of friends. It hasn't changed, in the slightest, since then. And, really, you could make the argument that it's gotten worse as it's moved along throughout a decade and a half. I think it should be obvious to most, if not all, of you that I did not like this movie in the slightest. The thing is, however, that there seems to be no end in sight for this interminable, yet strangely profitable, franchise. Underworld is a franchise that goes on because it keeps making money, yet it is one that very few people seem to care about. I know it's got passionate fans, but I don't know, they don't seem to be that obsessive and, at this point, you're making this movie for them. Sure, a more casual crowd may see an Underworld movie every 3-4 years, but they don't care. It's a movie they watch for the sake of it. Regardless, I just wish it would end. It's gone on long enough and they ran out of ideas after the first sequel. As far as this particular entry is concerned, it's another nonsensical, poorly acted, poorly choreographed sequel. The lycans and vampire are at war, STILL, and now they, they being both vampires and lycans, need Selene's daughter's blood (a daughter that Selene gave up at the end of the previous film) in order to stop the war. How the fuck does Selene's daughter's (who's the first pureblood hybrid or something) blood end the war between the lycans (led by a new, powerful lycan called Marius) and vampires, I do not know, but it supposedly will. Talking about Marius, he's supposedly someone Selene should really fear, he's bringing lycans together like never before. So he's Selene's toughest challenge to date until her next toughest challenge to date. And that's the problem with this franchise, every villain is so forgettable because you, inevitably, know that he or she is gonna be overcome at the end of the day. Even Marvel, who suffers from some of these same forgettable villains, has Thanos, who fucked shit up in Infinity War. Thanos actually WON in Infinity War. Neither here nor there, I suppose. So everyone is fighting for knowledge of where Selene's daughter is hiding. Selene's daughter, however, never once appears in the movie. So you could make the argument that this really is a whole big fucking waste of time, because the person that is driving this entry's narrative forward only appears seconds before the movie ends. This is there to fill in the blanks between Selene's daughter's disappearance and her return in the sequel. The movie, quite openly, admits that it is not worth your time. And you know how disheartening to know that a film you're watching, in a terrible franchise no less, isn't really that important. You know when I said the narrative moves forward, that was a big mistake on my part. The narrative moves laterally. It just moves a little to the left. And if it moved a little to the left yet still provided something that was entertaining but, of course, this being the Underworld franchise, you know there's nothing good. Not even if you look at it ironically or if you attempt to laugh at it. Everything is so self-serious, so gloomy, so dark that, really, it becomes a parody in and of itself. Even the Resident Evil movie had Mike Epps in one of the many entries in that franchise. This has no sense of humor whatsoever. This is even more noticeable given the fact that I was not able to finish this review prior to me watching yesterday night's movie. That movie was 2003's Zatoichi: The Blind Swordsman. Which, while having a relatively serious story of this blind swordsman (duh) fighting back against this gang that's forcing its weight on this village and the swordsman eventual showdown against the gang's lead bodyguard, still had a lot of really strong comedic elements to liven things up. This movie, on the other hand, doesn't have an inch of comedy in its blood, it seems that the vampires sucked all the sense of humor (that it never had) out of this franchise's carcass. The acting is boring. Well, really, Theo James' face bores the shit out of me and he seems to not care that much either. It's not like anyone here is good, the script is just too fucking bad for anyone to be truly good, but they're all better than Theo James who, honestly, looked like he was sleepwalking through 75% of it and the other 25% he was awake cause he was starting at Kate Beckinsale's ass. Like I mentioned, the action terrible and they try to make up for it by it being bloody and gory (but not TOO bloody and gory) and it just doesn't work. The action in this movie just feels so fucking weightless. Like a kid playing with toys and he smashes them together. And, even then, the toys make a loud noise if you smash them together too hard. This movie doesn't even have that. There's no impact to any of the action, no oomph necessary to make this R-rated action movie, it's all weak and poorly edited together. Logan succeeded in its gory action because it felt brutal and visceral, like they were actually doing damage to each other. This movie, someone could be shot seven times, it's like nothing happened. It's like they got shot with, instead of bullets, baby's farts. One positive, if it can even be called that, is that there's no unnecessarily pointless sex scene. It's only a flashback to a sex scene EARLIER in this franchise. This movie, quite frankly, is a disaster. Perhaps not a disaster of epic proportions, but it does literally nothing well. It's not the worst movie I've ever seen, but it fails monumentally at everything that it sets out to do. Sorry, Underworld fans, but this movie is kind of terrible. I really cannot think of any redeemable qualities about this. It's incredibly difficult. I hated this and I cannot fucking WAIT for this franchise to be over. The suffering has gone on long enough.

    So it looks like yesterday I was able to utilize a mobile hotspot to post the reviews on the sites that I post them on. If it holds up, this will be what I use for the next week or so as the appointment to have it fixed was made for next Friday. Funny thing about that is that we were informed by our provider that their people came to perform some improvements that, apparently, left us without service and a few other people as well. They didn't say this when they contacted us, I just mean that a neighbor's friend is going through the same thing. They don't say anything about coming to fix their mistake though, since it doesn't seem to be something on our end. Neither here nor there, I suppose. Just thought I should give you an update on the situation. So DVDs it is or borrowed DVDs at least. Hmmm, where do I start with the Underworld franchise??? I think it should be noted that Screen Gems, who distributed the franchise, also distributed the long-running Resident Evil franchise, another long-running female-lead action franchise. And, ultimately, I think both franchises suffer from the same problems. That major problem is and, in my opinion, I think Underworld suffers more from this, is the fact that every single one of the stories in these movies just start to blend together. As much as someone may love either of these franchises, you can't tell me that each installment is really all that different from one another deep down. The reason I say that Underworld is worse in this regard is because of the fact that the story, essentially, almost always involve some sort of battle between the lycans and the vampires. Every Underworld movie has the same visual style, you know the one, that bluish hue. You cannot tell any of these movies apart. Resident Evil, on the other hand, while still largely a terrible franchise, at least branched out and employed different visual styles while still, generally, dealing with the T-Virus and how it turns those who suffer from it into zombies. Underworld has looked and felt the same since its first installment came out in 2003. I was FIFTEEN fucking years old when the first movie came out, a movie that I saw in theaters with a couple of friends. It hasn't changed, in the slightest, since then. And, really, you could make the argument that it's gotten worse as it's moved along throughout a decade and a half. I think it should be obvious to most, if not all, of you that I did not like this movie in the slightest. The thing is, however, that there seems to be no end in sight for this interminable, yet strangely profitable, franchise. Underworld is a franchise that goes on because it keeps making money, yet it is one that very few people seem to care about. I know it's got passionate fans, but I don't know, they don't seem to be that obsessive and, at this point, you're making this movie for them. Sure, a more casual crowd may see an Underworld movie every 3-4 years, but they don't care. It's a movie they watch for the sake of it. Regardless, I just wish it would end. It's gone on long enough and they ran out of ideas after the first sequel. As far as this particular entry is concerned, it's another nonsensical, poorly acted, poorly choreographed sequel. The lycans and vampire are at war, STILL, and now they, they being both vampires and lycans, need Selene's daughter's blood (a daughter that Selene gave up at the end of the previous film) in order to stop the war. How the fuck does Selene's daughter's (who's the first pureblood hybrid or something) blood end the war between the lycans (led by a new, powerful lycan called Marius) and vampires, I do not know, but it supposedly will. Talking about Marius, he's supposedly someone Selene should really fear, he's bringing lycans together like never before. So he's Selene's toughest challenge to date until her next toughest challenge to date. And that's the problem with this franchise, every villain is so forgettable because you, inevitably, know that he or she is gonna be overcome at the end of the day. Even Marvel, who suffers from some of these same forgettable villains, has Thanos, who fucked shit up in Infinity War. Thanos actually WON in Infinity War. Neither here nor there, I suppose. So everyone is fighting for knowledge of where Selene's daughter is hiding. Selene's daughter, however, never once appears in the movie. So you could make the argument that this really is a whole big fucking waste of time, because the person that is driving this entry's narrative forward only appears seconds before the movie ends. This is there to fill in the blanks between Selene's daughter's disappearance and her return in the sequel. The movie, quite openly, admits that it is not worth your time. And you know how disheartening to know that a film you're watching, in a terrible franchise no less, isn't really that important. You know when I said the narrative moves forward, that was a big mistake on my part. The narrative moves laterally. It just moves a little to the left. And if it moved a little to the left yet still provided something that was entertaining but, of course, this being the Underworld franchise, you know there's nothing good. Not even if you look at it ironically or if you attempt to laugh at it. Everything is so self-serious, so gloomy, so dark that, really, it becomes a parody in and of itself. Even the Resident Evil movie had Mike Epps in one of the many entries in that franchise. This has no sense of humor whatsoever. This is even more noticeable given the fact that I was not able to finish this review prior to me watching yesterday night's movie. That movie was 2003's Zatoichi: The Blind Swordsman. Which, while having a relatively serious story of this blind swordsman (duh) fighting back against this gang that's forcing its weight on this village and the swordsman eventual showdown against the gang's lead bodyguard, still had a lot of really strong comedic elements to liven things up. This movie, on the other hand, doesn't have an inch of comedy in its blood, it seems that the vampires sucked all the sense of humor (that it never had) out of this franchise's carcass. The acting is boring. Well, really, Theo James' face bores the shit out of me and he seems to not care that much either. It's not like anyone here is good, the script is just too fucking bad for anyone to be truly good, but they're all better than Theo James who, honestly, looked like he was sleepwalking through 75% of it and the other 25% he was awake cause he was starting at Kate Beckinsale's ass. Like I mentioned, the action terrible and they try to make up for it by it being bloody and gory (but not TOO bloody and gory) and it just doesn't work. The action in this movie just feels so fucking weightless. Like a kid playing with toys and he smashes them together. And, even then, the toys make a loud noise if you smash them together too hard. This movie doesn't even have that. There's no impact to any of the action, no oomph necessary to make this R-rated action movie, it's all weak and poorly edited together. Logan succeeded in its gory action because it felt brutal and visceral, like they were actually doing damage to each other. This movie, someone could be shot seven times, it's like nothing happened. It's like they got shot with, instead of bullets, baby's farts. One positive, if it can even be called that, is that there's no unnecessarily pointless sex scene. It's only a flashback to a sex scene EARLIER in this franchise. This movie, quite frankly, is a disaster. Perhaps not a disaster of epic proportions, but it does literally nothing well. It's not the worst movie I've ever seen, but it fails monumentally at everything that it sets out to do. Sorry, Underworld fans, but this movie is kind of terrible. I really cannot think of any redeemable qualities about this. It's incredibly difficult. I hated this and I cannot fucking WAIT for this franchise to be over. The suffering has gone on long enough.

  • Dec 26, 2018

    I'm very disappointed compared to the previous one but both the scenarios and the impressive action scenes make up for it a little, although unfortunately what happened to the character of Michael, I would like to see the end of this story

    I'm very disappointed compared to the previous one but both the scenarios and the impressive action scenes make up for it a little, although unfortunately what happened to the character of Michael, I would like to see the end of this story

  • Dec 16, 2018

    Previously on Underworld, Kate Beckinsale is back once more as Selene and this time she's battling more lycans and it seems as though that her daughter, Eve is missing so Selene has to go find her daughter and kill the lycan leader. As far as the these films go, they're all mediocre and they're all the same thing in the same arse films. The violence whether it is stylistic is so goddamn nasty. Oooohh, nasty! It is as violent and bloody as each other that Underworld: Awakening for the most part. I got nothing more to say about this one and that's all I can say about these films, they're all the same and I'm getting really sick and tired about it and talking about them. They're all mediocre and they all coming to the world of s**t!

    Previously on Underworld, Kate Beckinsale is back once more as Selene and this time she's battling more lycans and it seems as though that her daughter, Eve is missing so Selene has to go find her daughter and kill the lycan leader. As far as the these films go, they're all mediocre and they're all the same thing in the same arse films. The violence whether it is stylistic is so goddamn nasty. Oooohh, nasty! It is as violent and bloody as each other that Underworld: Awakening for the most part. I got nothing more to say about this one and that's all I can say about these films, they're all the same and I'm getting really sick and tired about it and talking about them. They're all mediocre and they all coming to the world of s**t!

  • Nov 27, 2018

    Me alucina que se sigan gastando dinero en hacer películas de esta saga

    Me alucina que se sigan gastando dinero en hacer películas de esta saga

  • Sep 16, 2018

    Kate Beckinsale is compulsively watchable in this tale of Matrix-like vampires in their eternal war with luddite werewolves. Director Anna Foerster delivers slickly executed action sequences just as well as the original film's director (Beckinsdale's real-life ex-husband) Len Weisman. The fight sequences are quite good, even if they're not at the same level of Yuen Woo Ping's fight sequences in the Matrix films or as inventive as those in the John Wick films, but really, how many films at are those levels of awesomeness? Although I've never cared for the humorlessness and rather ponderous mythology of this franchise, which primarily seems to be an excuse to get to the next slow-motion gunfight and hand-to-hand fight sequence, I do really like the Underworld series. Most franchises by this time (this is the fifth in the series) can get bogged down by their own ever growing backstory, but series creator and producer Weisman manages to keep this story of high-tech vampires vs. low-tech werewolves interesting and never straying too far from it's original key story elements. Overall, if you enjoyed the previous films, you'll like this one too.

    Kate Beckinsale is compulsively watchable in this tale of Matrix-like vampires in their eternal war with luddite werewolves. Director Anna Foerster delivers slickly executed action sequences just as well as the original film's director (Beckinsdale's real-life ex-husband) Len Weisman. The fight sequences are quite good, even if they're not at the same level of Yuen Woo Ping's fight sequences in the Matrix films or as inventive as those in the John Wick films, but really, how many films at are those levels of awesomeness? Although I've never cared for the humorlessness and rather ponderous mythology of this franchise, which primarily seems to be an excuse to get to the next slow-motion gunfight and hand-to-hand fight sequence, I do really like the Underworld series. Most franchises by this time (this is the fifth in the series) can get bogged down by their own ever growing backstory, but series creator and producer Weisman manages to keep this story of high-tech vampires vs. low-tech werewolves interesting and never straying too far from it's original key story elements. Overall, if you enjoyed the previous films, you'll like this one too.

  • Aug 30, 2018

    Despite odd forced sjw nonsense("stupid blood purity", then she says"she is the strongest of us because her blood goes back to corvinus the first vampire"), it's an entertaining flick, with good action, despite a very simple story.

    Despite odd forced sjw nonsense("stupid blood purity", then she says"she is the strongest of us because her blood goes back to corvinus the first vampire"), it's an entertaining flick, with good action, despite a very simple story.