Authors

BrianOrndorf.com

Rating Title | Year Quote Author
1 75%

Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues (2013)

"Brevity is a friend to McKay, but as experimentations go, reworking known elements to manufacture a new perspective on all the monkey business, and the "Super-Sized R-Rated Version" remains a mirthful and mischievous vision."

Posted Feb 28, 2014

Brian Orndorf

2 93%

Zero Dark Thirty (2013)

"It's first-rate work from Bigelow and Boal, who treat the tale with conviction and knowledge, yet never lose sight of its inherent alarm, packaging a combustible narrative into one of the best pictures of 2012."

Posted Jan 3, 2013

Brian Orndorf

3 61%

Twin Peaks - Fire Walk with Me (1992)

"Promoted as a prequel to Twin Peaks, but it was actually Excalibur pushed through the heart of a phenomenon, leaving the faithful to grieve, while newcomers were left baffled, or in my case, ravenous for more."

Posted Aug 27, 2012

Brian Orndorf

4 62%

Honeymoon in Vegas (1992)

"With his wild, thinning hair and general look of disease, Cage's interpretation of Jack's desperation is a total hoot, bravely unglamorous and consistently agitated. "

Posted Aug 27, 2012

Brian Orndorf

5 26%

Pet Sematary Two (1992)

"Pet Sematary II looks like a feature that quickly slipped out of Lambert's control, and she decided to drive the production into the ground out of spite."

Posted Aug 27, 2012

Brian Orndorf

6 64%

Cosmopolis (2012)

"Cronenberg seems like he has something specific, possibly devilishly satiric in mind, but his screen instincts are numb, constructing a feature that lurches from scene to scene."

Posted Aug 23, 2012

Brian Orndorf

7 8%

The Gun in Betty Lou's Handbag (1992)

"A terrible picture, absent rhythm and purpose, straining hard to remain charismatic and mysterious while it engages in pure nonsense, crudely arranged by Moyle in a career-killing feature."

Posted Aug 20, 2012

Brian Orndorf

8 10%

Christopher Columbus: The Discovery (1992)

"The drama never catches fire, cycling through the same beats of uncertainty and blame to a point of screen stasis. The opening driving montage of Manos: The Hands of Fate has more of a filmmaking zip."

Posted Aug 20, 2012

Brian Orndorf

9 31%

Rapid Fire (1992)

"It's not a great picture by any means, yet there are highlights in Rapid Fire worth savoring, most centered on Lee's martial art choreography."

Posted Aug 20, 2012

Brian Orndorf

10 46%

Stay Tuned (1992)

"Simply crashes upon takeoff, going nowhere in a hurry, sniffing around for pop culture overkill and domestic depression insight it never makes a genuine play to explore. "

Posted Aug 16, 2012

Brian Orndorf

11 56%

Single White Female (1992)

"Turns out both of these women are mentally damaged, adding a nice little purple-nurple to the script, giving the actresses something with a little more bite to play with."

Posted Aug 16, 2012

Brian Orndorf

12 52%

Raising Cain (1992)

"In a world where Redacted exists, Raising Cain isn't De Palma's least effective picture, but it's damn near close, purposely unreasonable and shockingly leaden all the way."

Posted Aug 6, 2012

Brian Orndorf

13 96%

Unforgiven (1992)

"It's a somber feature, but one of extraordinary character development, bundled into a compelling story of men facing their sins in a most brutal, pitiless manner."

Posted Aug 6, 2012

Brian Orndorf

14 25%

Bebe's Kids (1992)

"Rough around the edges and careless with plot, but Bebe's Kids maintains personality throughout, doing justice to the memory of Harris and his most unusual stand-up creation."

Posted Jul 30, 2012

Brian Orndorf

15 33%

Buffy the Vampire Slayer (1992)

"Buffy isn't funny or scary, it's just mediocre, slowly losing interest in itself as Kuzui runs out of imagination."

Posted Jul 30, 2012

Brian Orndorf

16 43%

Death Becomes Her (1992)

"Highly amusing, but there's nothing to the feature beyond cheap thrills and a few laughs."

Posted Jul 30, 2012

Brian Orndorf

17 10%

Mom and Dad Save the World (1992)

"Director Greg Beeman fashions a toothless feature, though one with an undeniable pace and, well, Kathy Ireland in tiny outfits."

Posted Jul 26, 2012

Brian Orndorf

18 13%

Mo' Money (1992)

"It's a shame. A low down dirty shame. Or maybe I'm thinking of another Wayans family member."

Posted Jul 26, 2012

Brian Orndorf

19 94%

The Queen of Versailles (2012)

"It makes sense to find the director unwilling to walk away from such as a fascinating couple, resulting in a superb documentary and a powerful statement on the ugliness and delusion of greed."

Posted Jul 19, 2012

Brian Orndorf

20 65%

Trishna (2012)

"Trishna rewards with its observational qualities, while promoting Pinto as an actress worth paying attention to."

Posted Jul 19, 2012

Brian Orndorf

21 21%

360 (2012)

"Meirelles keeps the film humming along, braiding these strangers into a single display of yearning, albeit a craving that takes the occasional unsavory turn."

Posted Jul 19, 2012

Brian Orndorf

22 79%

Juan of the Dead (2012)

"A little too slight to fill out a feature-length run time, yet it's spunky enough to entertain and occasionally horrify, though it's not always the zombies that induce the most revulsion. "

Posted Jul 19, 2012

Brian Orndorf

23 68%

Extraterrestrial (2012)

"Never quite the feature most will expect it to be, Extraterrestrial is a charming submission of low-fi scripting, using a colossal development in universal happenings to reinforce the quirks and hazards of love. "

Posted Jul 19, 2012

Brian Orndorf

24 5%

30 Beats (2012)

"Unfortunately, the filmmaker mistakes inertia for sensuality, keeping the material in a frustrating state of paralysis. "

Posted Jul 19, 2012

Brian Orndorf

25 41%

Honey, I Blew Up the Kid (1992)

"Boots away a warm familial dynamic to chase tedious villain shenanigans, forgetting what made the first picture so successful."

Posted Jul 16, 2012

Brian Orndorf

26 23%

A Stranger Among Us (1992)

"Stuck with a permanently detached lead actress who juggles snappy cop jargon and sex appeal with all the concentration of pothead."

Posted Jul 16, 2012

Brian Orndorf

27 24%

Why Stop Now? (2012)

"Isn't very funny or poignant, drifting somewhere in between while the actors make the best out of a lackluster storytelling situation. "

Posted Jul 13, 2012

Brian Orndorf

28 86%

Beasts of the Southern Wild (2012)

"To appreciate Beasts one must relax their expectations, allowing the feature's sputtery sense of momentum to generate a feeling of detachment and parental love."

Posted Jul 13, 2012

Brian Orndorf

29 37%

Ice Age: Continental Drift (2012)

"Feels like more of a pause than a true sequel, leaving hope that the producers will be able to steer the franchise back to more fertile creative ground before extinction finally arrives."

Posted Jul 13, 2012

Brian Orndorf

30 29%

The Magic of Belle Isle (2012)

"Sometimes it's difficult to remember that Reiner once directed This is Spinal Tap. "

Posted Jul 12, 2012

Brian Orndorf

31 5%

Cool World (1992)

"Cool World isn't difficult to watch (there's too much insanity floating around to be bored), it's just impossible to digest, absent any grounded activities that could elevate the viewing experience past weirdo cartoon diarrhea."

Posted Jul 9, 2012

Brian Orndorf

32 19%

Universal Soldier (1992)

"There's a decent bit of escapism in here somewhere, but Emmerich doesn't possess the finesse to make the material rampage as it should."

Posted Jul 9, 2012

Brian Orndorf

33 67%

The Pact (2012)

"A satisfying ghost story without leaning too hard into trends. It's not a deliciously overwhelming feature, but The Pact has modest vision worth a look."

Posted Jul 6, 2012

Brian Orndorf

34 51%

Savages (2012)

"Coarse and half-asleep, Savages is a waste of Stone's time and energy, falling back on tired habits of provocation best left buried with his 1994 sensorial blast, Natural Born Killers. "

Posted Jul 5, 2012

Brian Orndorf

35 43%

To Rome with Love (2012)

"That's the miracle of this filmmaker. Woody Allen will make the occasional stinker, but he's always a year away from his next masterpiece."

Posted Jul 5, 2012

Brian Orndorf

36 90%

Born on the Fourth of July (1989)

"An exceptional feature on every level of execution, also displaying a rare sensitivity to Stone that he would spend the rest of his career trying to bury in violence and experimentation. "

Posted Jul 4, 2012

Brian Orndorf

37 38%

Boomerang (1992)

"The cop-out conclusion doesn't dilute the playfulness the Hudlins are always interested in providing. I only wish they had the opportunity to work with Murphy again."

Posted Jul 3, 2012

Brian Orndorf

38 76%

A League of Their Own (1992)

"Marshall's finest hour as a filmmaker, capturing audience-pleasing moments with assurance, while also paying careful attention to the vulnerabilities of the characters."

Posted Jul 3, 2012

Brian Orndorf

39 73%

The Amazing Spider-Man (2012)

"Much of The Amazing Spider-Man has been seen before, in a better film with a more delirious director, making this unofficial remake puzzling."

Posted Jul 3, 2012

Brian Orndorf

40 78%

Katy Perry: Part of Me (2012)

"A flashy, enlightening time capsule of Perry's career. It's no concert film, but more of a backstage laminate, permitting fans access to the singer and her turbulent year of mega-stardom. "

Posted Jul 3, 2012

Brian Orndorf

41 21%

Madea's Witness Protection (2012)

"A picture that finds Perry channeling the comedies of Jerry Lewis. At least Lewis in his later years of performing. Like The Day the Clown Cried. "

Posted Jun 29, 2012

Brian Orndorf

42 80%

Magic Mike (2012)

"Soderbergh pulls out every trick in the book to make Magic mean something beyond its parade of shaved backs and tanned buttocks, but it's a lost cause, endeavoring to bring meaning to material best appreciated for its surface appeal."

Posted Jun 29, 2012

Brian Orndorf

43 55%

People Like Us (2012)

"The trick of Us is making the audience not mind the unnatural delay, supplying characters dimensional enough to ignore their odd lack of common sense. The picture has that power. "

Posted Jun 29, 2012

Brian Orndorf

44 68%

Ted (2012)

"Avoids pitch-black comedy, selecting a more rascally tone that toys with Boston brute behaviors (served with wicked good accents) and the undeniable magic of a bong-sucking teddy bear that has sex with women. "

Posted Jun 28, 2012

Brian Orndorf

45 83%

Your Sister's Sister (2012)

"Perfectly fine somewhere between the humor of discomfort and that brutality of the truth, sustaining its feel for family and the bond between loved ones with sure feel for splattery screen communication."

Posted Jun 28, 2012

Brian Orndorf

46 93%

Last Ride (2012)

"The performances are marvelous, expressing an enormous reservoir of suspicion and grief without bleeding into melodrama, preferring to expose naked emotion through looks instead of fidgety gestures."

Posted Jun 28, 2012

Brian Orndorf

47 75%

Unlawful Entry (1992)

"Unlawful Entry does a tremendous job provoking the viewer with crude elements of bullying."

Posted Jun 25, 2012

Brian Orndorf

48 35%

Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter (2012)

"The feature doesn't have the twinkle in its eye to accurately blend SuperLincoln with TrueLincoln into a loving, ax-swinging whole."

Posted Jun 21, 2012

Brian Orndorf

49 78%

Brave (2012)

"It still entertains and there's enough animated detail here to stay invested in the screen antics, but it's far from the sorely needed fairy tale reimagining the opening promises."

Posted Jun 21, 2012

Brian Orndorf

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