Lyle Bandoquillo's Movie Ratings - Rotten Tomatoes

Movie Ratings and Reviews

Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice

Awkward dialogue and stunted melodrama aside, Zack Snyder delivers a darkly tense and visually exhilarating (if not over-long) testosterone fest that ends with every well-meaning actor drudged through the mud that is this mess of a film.

10 Cloverfield Lane

Misery meets Room meets War of the Worlds... with a dash of Cabin in the Woods

Zootopia
Zootopia(2016)
½

A gimmicky story but fun and fast-paced throughout, with genuine surprises and even more genuine references--both hysterical and culturally apt

Deadpool
Deadpool(2016)

Rapid-fire jokes and delicious cynicism aside, this is one of the most loyal and effective translations of a comic to the big screen, boasting a gorily brisk but predictable narrative with mostly fleshed-out characters that leave you excited and wanting for more (blood)

Kung Fu Panda 3

Still zany and fast-paced as the first two, while continuing to push the vivid art direction, but the surreal spiritual story feels a bit incoherent and the villain weak.

Hail, Caesar!

Overblown and incoherent, with too much inside humour and alienating references, save for its handsome production pieces that are all too out of place

Brooklyn
Brooklyn(2015)
½

Engaging in its atmospheric realism and wry innocence despite the forced dramatic twists and a little too on-the-nose rapier wit

Spotlight
Spotlight(2015)

Dry, heavy but brisk, with a solid if not too-understated performances leading to a rather clinical execution

Carol
Carol(2015)

Simple and raw, yet underwhelming in scope, spearheaded by the two lead's nuanced and deafeningly subtle roller coaster of emotions

The Danish Girl
½

A little too melodramatic, turning this historically groundbreaking story into nothing more than a made-for-TV-movie with a big budget

Ex Machina
Ex Machina(2015)
½

Hit or miss pseudo-psychological thriller that tries something unique but can't really follow through.

Joy
Joy(2015)

A wholly depressing exercise in acting 101. Ironically, there's no character arch despite the talented ensemble and the blames fall flat on David O Russell's scatterbrained direction.

The Peanuts Movie

Less of an homage but more of a rehash of the best-of-Peanuts running gags and tried storyline. Barely maintains the charm and melancholy of the original, which saves this otherwise unimaginative modern take.

Star Wars: Episode VII - The Force Awakens
½

More of a retread than anything, and only a couple of the new characters stand out mainly due to the fact that there are too many to focus on. However, the spectacle is definitely there and the film moves along briskly if not a little too fast despite its heavy and hectic story

The Good Dinosaur
½

Disjointed but charming and uniquely designed enough to stand out, especially the characters, even though this is basically Land Before Time meets The Croods.

Room
Room(2015)

Viscerally realistic and nuanced in it's intensity, Room easily captures the bleakness of confinement and the muted chaos of freedom

The Hunger Games: Mockingjay - Part 2

Talk about losing steam! This forced finale is full of hollow spectacle, unabashed exposition, and unconvincing conclusions that the only way to enjoy it is through the poor cast's stellar but ultimately wasted portrayals. And not enough Elizabeth Banks!

Hoshi o ou kodomo (Journey to Agartha) (Children Who Chase Lost Voices)

It's brisk pace and beautiful animation can't compensate for it's gratingly pedestrian dialogue and the story's convoluted mythology. A pale Studio Ghibil copy if there ever was one.

The Martian
The Martian(2015)
½

Evocative in a very subtle way, led by a robust cast but hampered by over-dialogue and an underwhelming climax.

Straight Outta Compton
½

Clearly aimed at a specific target, but the drama and breadth crashes all borders and engages from start to finish.

Mission: Impossible Rogue Nation
½

Thrilling and well-choriographed fight scenes, but the superb cast can't maintain the hyperactive momentum by the final quarter of the film.

Fantastic Four
½

One-third post modern action thriller, three-fourths Saturday morning children's show.

Tomorrowland
Tomorrowland(2015)

Imaginative ideas executed astonishingly, but doesn't really know what to make of it in the end.

Trainwreck
Trainwreck(2015)
½

Feels like an overlong comedy sketch with some quality laughs among several dead air and awkward moments.

Inside Out
Inside Out(2015)

So ingenious it borders on random, but the winning humour and stellar voice acting manages to coherently connect the wayward plot.

Jurassic World
½

While it feels highly manufactured (product placements, obvious CGI effects, and especially the forced human villains), it definitely manages to replicate most of the spirit and tension of the original, helped by a winning lead cast despite some few stunted dialogues.

Spy
Spy(2015)

Transcendent humour with entertaining action and a bevy of stellar performances gives Spy a healthy shot at being a classic comedy. Ironically, it induces too much laughter that you end up missing some of the jokes.

Pitch Perfect 2

A slight improvement from the original, but still tonally uneven with the humour and the musical choices.

Mad Max: Fury Road
½

Barely any brains but a whole lot of beauty, this narratively handicapped eye-and-ear-candy also falters on characterization and dialogue heft.

Big Eyes
Big Eyes(2014)

Quite predictable for a disjointedly directed and edited film. The acting is passable and the story, while originally fascinating, is rendered mediocre.

Avengers: Age of Ultron

Forced Hawkeye storyline nearly ruins this fun, poorly-choreographed-fighting movie.

Insurgent
Insurgent(2015)
½

A visually stunning but empty treat, lacking in both originality and character while boasting plenty of noise and wasted potential.

Cinderella
Cinderella(2015)
½

More beauty than brains, this serviceable umpteenth incarnation of Cinderella provides limited insight and dimension to the backstory of the central figures, tantalizing the viewer with the sumptuous potential of what could have been as opposed to the childish and indulgent end product.

Seventh Son
Seventh Son(2015)

Marginally watchable, though it's clear that the story is underdeveloped translating also to it's characters. Decent enough visual effects and an engaging if poorly executed third act.

The Tale of the Princess Kaguya

An inherently Japanese experience, from the stunning music to the delicate design. A near-magical and transcendent experience.

Exodus: Gods and Kings
½

Far from ground-breaking, but not at all unwatchable, with an engaging first half that show cases the politics and daily military life of ancient Egypt, before diluting itself with pretty visuals and a crumbling storyline.

The Imitation Game
½

Rather conventional biopic championed by simply the best acting lead role in a 2014 film, and an equally accomplished supporting cast. Predictable and generic at times, yet it never leaves you bored.

The Theory of Everything
½

Contrived, tedious, and utterly pedestrian.

Into the Woods
½

An enchantingly effective if not forgettable musical adaptation that bursts with colour and humour as well as well-placed cynicism, accompanied by mostly pleasant songs that move the story along and vigorous portrayals.

The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies
½

A lot more digestible length-wise compared to the last two entries, with the elaborate fight sequences more coordinated and the bridging to the Lord of the Rings subtly apparent. But the padded storyline still bogs down the flow and causes a disjointed feel midway and dissatisfying ending.

The Interview

Funny enough for the most part, with a couple of laugh-out-loud cameos and some surprisingly insightful observations the media, but eventually piles upon cliche after cliche as it attempts to conclude the somewhat predictable storyline.

The Hunger Games: Mockingjay - Part 1

Reshuffles the structure and fun from the previous installments--especially highlighted in Catching Fire--and offers a new look at warfare focusing on propaganda and politics as opposed to violence.

Birdman
Birdman(2014)

Highly introspective and poignantly emotional, punctuated by committed acting and an ever more committed (art) direction

Interstellar
Interstellar(2014)

Almost reaches interstellar heights with its grounded cinematography and psychedelic visual effects, but loses a bit of trajectory once it shoehorns 'love' as a quantifiable equation--and plot point--in an already dense sci-fi extravaganza.

Big Hero 6
Big Hero 6(2014)
½

A perfectly adequate marriage between mushy Disney storytelling and lightning-fast animé pacing. Despite the lack of originality, the terrific soundtrack and memorable visuals more than makes up for it, delivering a constantly hilarious spectacle.

Gone Girl
Gone Girl(2014)
½

The worst part of this consistently intriguing, acerbically executed, aptly humorous, zeitgesity film is the title -- it should be called How to Get Away with Murder: Solidifying a Broken Marriage. It's far from intellectual, but it sure knows how to properly pull the strings.

This Is Where I Leave You
½

The best hit-or-miss movie in decades; full of cliches, stock characters, and nuggets of genuine warmth.

The Maze Runner
½

Divergent meets Lord of the Flies meets the Wizard of Oz -- a highly unoriginal, random, but occasionally thrilling piece of forgettable entertainment.

Guardians of the Galaxy
½

So post-modernly funny and convolutedly action-packed that you'll forget about its lacklustre script and irregular acting!

Dawn Of The Planet Of The Apes
½

Atmospheric, but a tad predictable and a little too Shakesperean for a talking-apes-with-guns kinda film...

22 Jump Street

A vast improvement from the original, with plenty of worthwhile in-jokes and fourth wall pokes--as well as the best post-credit scenes in cinematic history--make this sequel an instant classic

A Million Ways to Die in the West

Barely funny and highly unoriginal, this comedy quickly turns into a sad tale about great actors struggling in a poorly executed film.

How to Train Your Dragon 2
½

Bogged down by incessant monologues, flashbacks, and a poorly paced plot, this sequel is a very slight step back from the original, compensating with stellar visual effects and a memorable score

Pompeii
Pompeii(2014)
½

Horrendous screenplay, shoddy acting, contradictory plot, but so-so visual effects

Maleficent
Maleficent(2014)
½

A children's movie with a capital 'C,' this revisionist fantasy oozes with one-dimensional spectacle and a potentially attainable epic story that's ultimately abandoned for mediocrity.

Godzilla
Godzilla(2014)

An amateur director delivers a high-contrast action film that excels in bombastic visuals and biting tension but seriously (and sometimes hilariously) devoid of heart and soul, and compounded by the fact that he rehashed the storyline of his previous film, Monster.

X-Men: Days of Future Past

Stunning action directing and a solid enough commitment from the cast, but the screen play sometimes lacks conviction that certain character arches are downright unconvincing and take you away from the otherwise fast-paced drama

August: Osage County

A very episodic melodrama bloated for the big screen, with spoonfuls of Grecian tragedy and a dash of Mexican soap opera -- an intoxicating if not hollow film to digest.

Noah
Noah(2014)

This is what happens when you let an uber left-wing liberal adapt and direct a biblical tale: you get an ecological epic with shades of bitter dark scenes here and there and avant guard artistic license. Stellar performance from the entire cast, with Emma Watson maturing immaculately and Jennifer Connelly proving again why she once won an Oscar. Unfortunately, some of the hokum from the source material presents itself quite saccharinely.

300: Rise of an Empire
½

Beautifully art-directed and amateurishly executed. Feels longer due to the excessive slow-motion style that's quite frankly gimmicky and out-dated.

Divergent
Divergent(2014)

Definitely a poor man's Hunger Games, lacking in scope and plot cohesion, but with enough twists and sassy characterizations for throughly enjoyable and sometimes mundane movie experience.

The Grand Budapest Hotel
½

Funny, poetic and ultimately melancholy, but succinctly embossed with the finest eye-popping production and deliciously quirky.

Her
Her(2013)

Affectively postmodern but hinges too much on the melancholy. Impressively written and beautifully executed, otherwise completely underwhelming.

The LEGO Movie
½

Wreck-it-Ralph meets the Matrix. A meta good time with a solid amount of awesome jokes, but the conclusion is too out-there that it takes you away from the fun ride the first two acts offered up.

Dallas Buyers Club
½

Has a nice documentary feel to it, along with the quality acting, but the pace is a but stunted and the ending is not as exhilarating as one would hope.

Philomena
Philomena(2013)
½

Bitterly sweet and bitingly reverent, Philomena delivers a powerful story in the most subtle way, eschewing from Hollywood standards to produce memorable experience. Phenomenal performances and surprisingly funny.

American Hustle
½

A stellar screenplay but an only above average script. Bale, Adams and Lawrence mainly carries the movie, with many oscar-bait scenes that should satiate the audience, not to mention the stylish production value.

The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug

A stark improvement from the first one, while spiritedly maintaining the humour and grand adventure. Unfortunately, it still feels a tad long and padded with unnecessary characterization.

Super 8
Super 8(2011)

A very involving and satisfying send-up to Spielberg classics.

A Single Man
A Single Man(2009)
½

Overly stylized directing detracts from the storyline, but the superb acting and high production culminate for a solid if not forgettable film experience.

Jack the Giant Slayer
½

Repetitive, exhausting, amateurish and sadly dated graphics.

Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues

Haphazard comedy with some tender moments of originality. Just feels a little forced and tedious at times.

Frozen
Frozen(2013)
½

Starts off joyously mocking the Disney cliches but eventually becomes a manufactured piece of so-so art. The witty songs and varied humour save the film, thankfully, as well as some dark and unpredictable moments.

Ender's Game
Ender's Game(2013)

Cold and devoid of character, but creatively designed with some exciting action sequences and satisfying plot twists. Lasts a bit too long and some of the child actors border on annoying.

The Hunger Games: Catching Fire
½

Half a point OFF for taking out the Katniss/Joanna cat fight! ARGH! Otherwise a serviceable sequel that slightly improves on the source matter by tying some loose ends, but inexplicably downplays two key 'shock' moments that could have been milked for more satisfying dramatic effect.

Thor: The Dark World

Very pretty to look at, but the only thing worth the price of admission is Loki's Tom Hiddlestone. Move over, Thor...

Pacific Rim
Pacific Rim(2013)
½

It piles on cliche after cliche, but it's a fun ride in the end if you can stomach some cheesy or clumsy dialogue. Great design and soundtrack.

Gravity
Gravity(2013)

Nice to see a movie take it's time, compensating with a lot of ambient intensity complimented by the best 3D yet in film. The screenplay is a tad on the amateurish side, but that's a tertiary issue that does not bog down the film too much.

The Wolverine
½

Some decent cinematography and fighting scenes, otherwise generic comic book fare.

The Conjuring
½

Does what it's supposed to do but is ultimately predictable, if not commendable for its efforts to breathe new life to the genre.

Monsters University

Starts off with a bunch of cliches and predictable storyline, but gets into gear in the middle with some nice plot twists and humour (the challenge of scaring teenagers). If you're not a fan of the first Monsters, you won't be swayed over...

World War Z
World War Z(2013)

With a serviceable amount of tense moments and a nice take on the cure, the light ending lets everything before it down and doesn't really answer the main question originally posed.

But at the end of the day, Arabs and Israelis joining together will end in disaster and you're always, ALWAYS safe in Canada.

Man of Steel
Man of Steel(2013)
½

Ignoring the cheesy beginning, once the testosterone uploads, it does not relent (although a little repetitive fighting, though very cool and far surpassing Avenger). Excellent casting, especially with Cavill, Costner and the bad-ass Kryptonian chick. Could have used a bit more estrogen...

This Is the End

This year's Pineapple Express -- only better! Killer humour and sweet 90's references. Jonah Hill's best performance since Money Ball! And to top it all off, this movie is religious!?!?

Mama
Mama(2013)

Great scares and genuinely chilling atmosphere, but eventually falters due to the weak physics/logic of its ghost mythology (why no ghost mom vs ghost mom???)

Star Trek Into Darkness
½

A very slight improvement from the already stellar previous installment, with the same amount of humour and admirably unpredictable plot (though overly done so). A more fleshed-out villain this time around, and commendably acted. There are a couple of cringy cliches and muddled plotting, but so far the best summer film.

Iron Man 3
Iron Man 3(2013)

A fun and convoluted sequel to the Avengers (despite the title). Still funny and an improvement to Iron Man 2, but too many cliched characters (Gwyneth too much of a damsel in distress) and a very contrived and ultimately confusing 'second' villain agenda that the script just can't handle to explain. Nothing ground-breaking but lots of cool scenes with the suite.

Side Effects
Side Effects(2013)
½

A step down compared to Contagion, but a riveting 3rd act

Monsters
Monsters(2010)
½

Bad acting, aimless writing, lazy design, and an unresolved story...

The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey
½

What's with all the singing and the flashback!? Seriously, Jackson could have easily cut 30 min of this otherwise gorgeous and involving film.

Life of Pi
Life of Pi(2012)

Visually arresting and randomly coherent.

Skyfall
Skyfall(2012)
½

More sex scenes, less cool gadgets. A notch superior to Casino Royale (and leaps and bounds beyond Quantum) thanks to a more fleshed-out Bond and a riveting third act.

Cloud Atlas
Cloud Atlas(2012)

Ambitious in scope, and in make-up and prosthetics, Cloud Atlas melds multiple story lines from multiple eras succeeding mostly due to the steadfast commitment of its hefty battalion of actors. But it buckles by the third act as the transcendental story continues to bite more than it can chew whilst still giving the audience an intermittently meandering rollercoaster ride.

Wreck-it Ralph
½

Forget the retro feel--which it executes perfectly--the storyline and screenplay manages to be fresh, witty and deliciously acerbic all at once. Very unpredictable and highly enjoyable no matter the age.

Argo
Argo(2012)

Reviting and inciteful, but Mr. Afflec ops for the Hollywood ending of exagerated tension and forced patriotism. And, yes, the denouement praises the Canadian effort but the presented storyline imbalances the yoke of the 'caper' favoring the CIA's efforts.

Looper
Looper(2012)
½

As enjoyable as the set-up and execution was, JGL's Bruce Willis makeup was too distracting bordering on annoying! There are also some obvious holes with the story and even paradoxes, don't over think the plot. Overall, great Terminator-esque feel and solid supporting cast (Emily never looked better).

John Carter
John Carter(2012)
½

Dense and convoluted, like how a novel-turned-film should be! And it doesn't skimp on the action, humour and twists.

The Dark Knight Rises

Very slightly inferior to its predecessor due to some clunky dialogue and Bane's butchered backstory. The pacing is still pretty fast despite the running time and a lot of twists to satisfy comic book lovers (and irritate nerds).

Total Recall
Total Recall(2012)
½

Outside of the coolest elevator ride in film history, this remake is too tedious and unnecessary. An extra star for Beckinsale and the gardener expressway, minus .5 for 3 boob hooker.

21 Jump Street
½

Not the best duo flick, but still pretty enjoyable. Korean Jesus is classic, though :-)

Snow White and the Huntsman

More of a collection of bad acting, this movie had so much potential (despite the fact that it borrows a lot from the 80's live action version). Still, Kristin is not the worst of perpetrators and Charlize-who loves to over pronounce her vowels-is a close second to the ultra melodramatic archer prince. Could be fun if you were high or drunk...

Magic Mike
Magic Mike(2012)

Pretty tame for its genre, and the side story of drugs and casual sex is nothing we haven't seen before. Still, some surprisingly solid acting and generally upbeat spirit (and choreography).

Brave
Brave(2012)

Funny and visually stunning but predictable and highly unoriginal. More of a Dreamworks effort than Pixar.

Easy A
Easy A(2010)

Wow -- talk about the trailer LYING to you. This is not at all how I thought the movie was. Scarlet Letter meets Mean Girls instead of CW high school crap.

Prometheus
Prometheus(2012)

While the screenplay deviates between annoyingly expositional to Cameron-esque banality, the sci-fi story soldiers on to deliver some of the best extraterrestrial spectacle and futuristic pseudo-technology. Still, why do the supreme overlord 'engineers' have to be an Aryan race...

Moonrise Kingdom

Definitely the best of the year so far, mainly for its offbeat execution (and timeless characterizations that utilizes the entire casts potential limited though some may be). This film notches a category on its own, bordering on iconic, and will be talked about for years.

50/50
50/50(2011)

An atypical and sugary buddy movie than would be expected, but still delivering the loveable crass humour thanks to Seth Rogen. Anna does her best with her meagre role and Angelica should have had more scenes.

Marvel's The Avengers

After a generic first act, lazy character development and some cheesy dialogue, the league of over-powered white guys pump enough testosterone and obvious in-jokes (appeasing the fanboys) to make for a fun 2.5 hours while not breaking any new ground in the genre.

The Dark Knight
½

Supprisingly well-rounded, unpredictable and exhilirating. Despite the 2.5 hour length it's still worth watching twice. And Heath's death was not in vain -- probobly one fo the best ways an actor could 'exit'.

Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban
½

Brilliant! Perfectly captures the wit and brevity of the book, not to mention the amazing chrono-bending adventure.

The Hunger Games

One of the very rare times where the film is a marked improvement from the novel. Still have no clue why Suzanne Collins' unadorned, one-dimensional writings is attracting a wide fan base (maybe cuz its os accessible); and the story is post-modern but nothing groundbreaking. Kudos to Ross for injecting some much needed humour, as sporadic as it may be, which will definitely be required for the dragging and tension-less part 3.

Cars 2
Cars 2(2011)
½

This is not as bad as critics make it out to be. Sure, stacked against the past Pixar greats it comes off as immature (and note that the original Cars is doldrums compared to this sequel), but Cars 2 has more humour, energy and a great sense of style making for a fun movie experience.

WALL-E
WALL-E(2008)
½

A PC falls in love with a Mac and the world is a better place. 90% Cute and 10% Preachy... not Pixar's best, but a solid film overall.

Sunshine
Sunshine(2007)
½

Interesting plot and good first and second act. The dialogue is a bit forced but all the actors were great (and some were HOT ;-). The anatgonist is kinda trippy though. Great effects and music too!

Melancholia
Melancholia(2011)
½

Agonizingly artsy, but Kristin almost makes up for it. The plodding plot is remarkably book-ended by sumptuous (if not overindulgent) opening and a gripping (Michael Bay-ish) ending.

The Descendants

Laughingly self-deprecating and poignantly unpredictable, but we've seen George play this character before.

Silent House
Silent House(2012)

Gives you the thrills or chills you might be looking for, but the forced psychological storyline is anything but groundbreaking. If you think you've been desensitized by violence and 'disturbing' plots, you will be bored.

We Need to Talk About Kevin

Despite shoddy editing and an unpredictable soundtrack, 'Kevin' presents a new perspective on the psychotic killer genre by focusing on the guilt-ridden parent who also suffers from survivor's guilt. Grippingly subtle performance from Tilda and appropriately chilling from Ezra, and an arrestingly cathartic third act.

The Muppets
The Muppets(2011)
½

Great 4th wall jokes and witty song and dance numbers, but ran a bit long.

Kung Fu Panda 2

Funny and full of adrenaline, like the Incredibles with MSG ;-)

Hugo
Hugo(2011)

A lovely but rather tedious collection of coincidences.

The Artist
The Artist(2011)

Impossibly loveable, witty and surprisingly hilarious, but after two hours the classical music becomes near-torturous.

The Iron Lady
½

All prosthetics and not enough vim; about as conservative as she was.

The Lovely Bones

Peter Jackson tries his best to create a gripping, domestic drama but ends up overcompensating with too many distracting psychedelic visual effects (that represent the main character's purgatory). The film ultimately feels disjointed and boring at times, with a few moments of tension and comedy. Mark Wahlberg was seriously miscast whilst Tucci's performance was nuanced enough, but nothing too extraordinary.

The Secret World of Arrietty
½

Definitely NOT their best, with a plodding story and under-developed characters. But very nice to look at...

Contagion
Contagion(2011)
½

If you want to see Gwyneth Paltrow's forehead cut open, this is your film. If you want to see Marion Cotillard struggle speaking English, ditto. In the end, it was Batman after all!

All About Eve
½

I guess this movie was epic in its days, so to speak, but the overwrought dialogue and the (now-ridiculous) plot doesn't stand the test of time...

Black Swan
Black Swan(2010)
½

Aronofsky pushes this psychological thriller to it's darkest potential, which may polarize most viewers making this a tough pill to swallow for mainstream popcorn-munchers. But for its genre, Black Swan excels thanks to its exceptional casting (and the use of non-actors as tertiary players is quite effective). Natalie Portman is seamless in her role as a stoic ballerina holding back from the brink of insanity. That plot may be confusing and jarring at times, but this is the artistic license Aronofsky has applied for and it effectively ties lose ends by the third act. And, as always, Mansel's scoring elevates the mood subtly by borrowing cues from Tchaikovsky.

Drive
Drive(2011)
½

A little too stylish for its own good and a rather dry conclusion. Great chops from Mr Brooks and Ms Mulligan and Ryan is just, well, cute.

Eternal Sunshine Of The Spotless Mind
½

A post modern romantic classic! From its unparalleled realism in the dialogue to the stunning art direction analogizing the complex relationship of the main cast. My only gripe is the disjointed Dunst/Wilkinson subplot.

There Will Be Blood
½

A gritty and reductionist look at the early days of workplace safety in the oil mines (among other dramas related to a single parent oil tycoon). The stylized score only enhances the somewhat eerie ambience. Superb acting throughout.

The Fighter
The Fighter(2010)
½

As sensationalized oscar-bait goes, this one is slightly a cut above. The capable ensemble can only do so much with a linear storyline, though Amy Adams and Christian Bale tend to chew the script a bit too much and Mark Mark is way too restrained for someone who's supposed to be the lead. Melissa Leo's melodramatic acting relies too much on extremes and is generally serviceable, but it does not deserve all the accolades its receiving. In the end, the film feels undercook and truncated (it's no classic yet def. better than Will Smith's Ali) but well worth the price of admission.

The Social Network
½

Good Will Hunting with a younger unsympathetic cast ('cept Garfield), and whiter -- if that's possible. But the cast, by and large, are credible and the dialogue is one of the few things the film's got going for it. Still, the elitism is just laid on too thick and drags on.

Tron Legacy
Tron Legacy(2010)

How can something so visually arresting and aurally intoxicating leave you intermittently bored to tears? And speaking of 'bore,' the plot hole's are as epic as the virtual landscape. But TRON is not going for cerebral ground-breaking. And, taken for what it is, it's a casual ride with two or three moments of sci-fi bliss.

The Chronicles of Narnia: The Voyage of the Dawn Treader

The de-evolution of the Narnia franchise continues. Helmed by Apted, known for the 007 series, Dawn Treader has action and nothing more. The plot is forced, the effects inferior, and the screenplay pedestrian. Despite a couple of genuinely 'magical' moments (and a Vlad Tepes cameo - in a children's movie!) the overall film just sails through mediocrity.

Tangled
Tangled(2010)

A more literal attempt at Disney to recapture its early 90's golden age, literally ripping scenes, characters, lines and even melody from its confirmed classics. Still, the hodgepoge works well mainly for the nostalgia and partly for the humour. And, man, that Flynn is one memorable character.

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows - Part 1
½

In what could arguably be the longest and most elaborate TRAILER for a movie, HP 7.1 feels disjointed and oddly paced culminating in a disappointing 'hanging' third act. It may have worked with Lord of the Rings 1 and 2, but David Yates doesn't know what to include or exclude giving the audience the perception that the impending 'sequal' is going to be rushed and equally jagged. But working with such a great source material, what's left is truly entertaining.

Never Let Me Go
½

See it only for Keira Knightley's villainous role and Andrew Garfield's appropriately erratic and Oscar worthy performance. And haunting score. Otherwise, this is nothing more than a girly melodrama of the Matrix... with a predictably bitter ending.

Devil
Devil(2010)
½

Nothing more than a parable about the Devil with similarities to Saw and Phone Booth, but far more inferior. The few tense moments and predictable 'twists' makes this more suitable as a rental, unless the negative influence of M Night Shyamalan's name plastered before and after the film has already changed your mind... Guilty by association.

Scott Pilgrim vs. the World

Here's a polarizing masterpiece! If you're too old you wont get it. If you're too young most of it will go over your head... And while the movie tends to get too self indulgent the nerd-esque references are simply golden to its target that you really don't care what other people thick by the time the lacto-ovo-vegan Superman comes into the screen. Mmm... vegan superman (drool)

The Last Exorcism
½

It gets the job done as a mix between Rosemary's Baby and the Exorcist. But the whole 'church-is-actually-a-satanist-cult' was too obvious. Not enough depth in terms of originality. But an 'A' for freight!

Inception
Inception(2010)
½

Shutter Island of the Spotless Mind. That said, another win for Mr. Nolan! Only a true filmmaker can pump this much testosterone into a film without alienating the nerds (the Wachowsky brothers tried with the Matrix). Let's just hope there's a sequal... based on the fact that the last scene with Leo clearly denotes he is still in someone's level as his children are wearing the same clothes and posing in the same manner as his imagination and dream projections.

Toy Story 3
Toy Story 3(2010)
½

Yea, yea, its the best 'threequal' in film history. Agreed.

Seriously, the ways Pixar comes up with fresh, transcendent humor and subtle yet gripping emotion is unbelievable. While at times it does seem like the studio is pushing for something darker, it nevertheless accomplishes what a true feel-good movie does. And who could hate on a one-eyed, herculean baby doll...

The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus
½

So much potential... The overly philosophical 'Faust' story line combined with overly art directed visuals wastes the entire casts wonderful talents who try their best to salvage the work of a once-great director from being to corny and ultimately unsatisfying.

Clash of the Titans
½

While the original verged on camp, this incarnation takes itself too seriously and lacks any sort of magic or mythology almost becoming too technical and 'action-packed'. The graphics, however, are quite impressive as well as the score. But the main character's Australian accent is annoyingly distracting (and his demigod girlfriend who sports an EMO voice).

How to Train Your Dragon

The unbelievable depth of the character development makes this slightly formulaic and predictable coming-of-age comedy a near classic. Pixar better watch out as DreamWorks has finally evolved beyond the bathroom humour of Shrek and pop culture overload of Sharktale.

And besides the great voice work, the visual direction is quite stellar for something 'for the kids' and easily makes use of 3D more so than Avatar.

Hot Tub Time Machine
½

The idiocy of its scientific logic makes this buddy-romp-com less realistic and, therefore, effective when compared to Hangover. Otherwise, the unique comedy angle of the setup is wonderfully contrasted by an unusually domestic third act that still ends in a comedic high note. And definitely aimed for those who reached puberty in the mid-eighties...

Capitalism: A Love Story

Somewhat slapdash and polemic, but insightful enough to make you think. But Moore's fake drama to materialize metaphors gets cheesy too fast and, at this point, predictable. And so is his manipulation of the victims.

The Blind Side

Sandra Bullock plays a spunky, rich white woman with a heart of gold and rescues a down-trodden over-weight black kid named Clarice 'Precious' Jones who is 16 and has two babies and -- wait, wrong movie.

In any event, Blind Side stands out of the multitude of sappy sport dramas by being unpredictable but straight to the point. And never EVER becomes corny or cliched. Oscar well deserved.

Percy Jackson & the Olympians: The Lightning Thief
½

Forced, cliched and predictable with a couple of fun and ingenious scenes (Medusa can turn fire to stone; Persephone is latina). But the 'driving miss daisy' angle of the subjugated black friend to his enlightened white friend is too much to bare. Where's Ares? Percy was supposed to nearly die by scorpion sting in the end? Where's the rest of the plot to fill the holes? Thank Chris Columbus for that as he thought he could do better making the film pop-friendly. And the dialogue is more pedestrian than childish until Lady Gaga's Poker Face fills the soundtrack halfway through...

Fantastic Mr. Fox

Filled with dry humour and witty, zoological reference but, unfortunately, loses it's childish whimsy as Wes Anderson desperately tries to modernize the Dahl classic. Adults will appreciate and roll over laughing, but children will be bored to tears. And great voice work from Clooney and Streep.

Up in the Air
½

A post-modern love story executed with such style and charm and enough edge to satisfy the popcorn munchers and double-digit IQ'ers. The accolades for Reitman's writing and directing is much deserved as his craft is more evident here than the sophomoric Juno a couple of years ago.

"I want that dance partner; I want that 'plus one.' And if you can stomach that... I want that to be you." - best line of the decade.

Inglourious Basterds
½

Tarantino reinvents the magic that made Pulp Fiction and Reservoir Dogs so bloody fun. And possibly the most lovable Nazi (Waltz) in film history! Despite its near-three hour length this film straps you into the front seat and never slows down. Almost all film directors go into a downward spiral in terms of their film quality (as evidenced by Spielberg, Shayamalan and, even, Cameron) which Tarantino, himself, agrees.

Quarantine
Quarantine(2008)

Starts off suspenseful, then predictable, then CREEPY! Unfortunately, it does not have the resonant replay value of the true horror classics and eventually becomes forgettable (except the last 15 minutes)! If only it stuck to the same Exorcist storyline of the original...

The Fountain
The Fountain(2006)

One of the very few films that ages very will with time. Aronofsky's daring, chrono-crossing storyline is elevated by the great acting of it's perfectly chosen cast and the ambience is further enhanced by Mansel's haunting music. And one of the few that at first you hate but slowly begin to admire.

Pineapple Express

Best buddy movie EVER! Even when sobre this film will still get you... and James Franco should get a freakin' Oscar. Just don't expect too much!

The Hangover
The Hangover(2009)
½

For its genre, this movie is a masterpiece. Unpredictable story, fun cast and genuine humor. For everyone else, it's just a joyride worth two or three viewings on DVD with friends.

...Heather Graham, FTW???

Paranormal Activity

Not exactly ground breaking, but the genuine acting of the unknown actors and the unpredictable storyline creates a great atmosphere of fright. And it's always commendable when horror films don't rely solely on gore to make the audience scream (save the ending).

Up
Up(2009)
½

Has its few moments of pure genius and nostalgia but, overall, does not have the grandeur heart and humor of Toy Story, Finding Nemo and The Incredibles. A solid, but sub-par, Pixar effort elevated by great, melancholy music and childish comedy.

The Princess and the Frog
½

It tries so hard to be the next Little Mermaid, but fails admirably. While the music fits perfectly with the bayou setting, Randy Newman just does not have the bravado of Alan Menken's stirring songs and scores that elevated the previous Disney princess films. The voice acting and art direction (and great humor) are the only laurels this movie can comfortably rest on which the entire experience worthwhile.

Nine
Nine(2009)

Marion Cottillard and Penelope Cruz save the day! Without them this self-indulgent Rob Marshall film feels more like a big budget college art film. Daniel Day-Lewis feels very generic and his character is so dislikable that it's hard to root for him when he's down. And Nicole Kidman's (limited) talent is wasted. But the music and the choreography almost makes up for this music video pastiche.

Precious: Based on the Novel Push by Sapphire

I'm glad Precious did not go the way of a Clint Eastwood movie (as it could easily have -- brooding and depressing). Then ending is endearing despite the dark and, at times, jarring depiction of the lower-lower class. And the storyline is interspersed with humor. Topnotch casting and editing.

Avatar
Avatar(2009)

Despite its semblance to other movies (Dances with Wolves, Pocahontas, etc.) and predictable story this film can mostly be enjoyed for it's technological merits. It has definitely raised the bar in terms of special effects. At times you can feel the strains of it's almost three hour length. But the great cast and interesting art direction make all worthwhile... almost.

Burn After Reading
½

The best ensamble cast of the year, and the worst soundtrack, editing and plot! Basically the ending of No Country for Old Men, only funnier (but very, very funny).

Tropic Thunder
½

Mostly interesting than funny. But the scenes with Robert Downey and Tom Cruise are worth the price of admission!

Hancock
Hancock(2008)

This movie doesn't know if it should be a psycho-analytical drama or an action-comedy and ends up being too unorthadox for its own good. And one full star off for Nancy Grace's cameo!

Volver
Volver(2006)
½

Provincial melodrama done right. The controversial storyline is carefully handled, delivering the juicy scenes humour and conviction. And a lot of personality.

The Happening

Some intriguing scenes and shocks and nothing else. NOTHING! Not even a third act... and the worst eco-whatever ending. I suggest Shayamalan goes back to ghosts and aliens.

The Strangers

A collection of B-movie horror cliches with a very random plot. And if the 'supernatural' badguys are indeed supernatural, how come the can't find their victim hiding in the pantry staring at them through the crack???

Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull

A pederastic journey into Nazca Peru while fighting the Russians. Before it was ther Germans. And Hindus. Only this one litterally has a deus-ex-machina in the end. Seriouisly!

The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian

A second rate movie by a third rate director based on a second rate source. But the battles are almost as good as Lord of the Rings and the characters have more emotional complexity than the Harry Potter crew. Still a hit and miss... and Jesus makes a cameo in the end as a somber but powerful river god. Seriously.

Iron Man
Iron Man(2008)

Stan Lee must be rolling in dough on his posturepedic bed. Iron Man is yet another formuleic reimagining of a subpar comic book, glossed to the max for the masses to consume. But despite its dents and scratches (cheesy dialogue and pseudophysics) Robert Downey Jr manages to litteraly elevate the entire movie with his suave, sarcastic take on the character. And Gwyneth lives!

Baby Mama
Baby Mama(2008)

Should have been called The Liz Lemon Movie, as Tina Fey channels her 30 Rock character in the big screen. Suprisingly funny, however the wittyness is a bit too obvious (kinda like Juno). Still, the unpredictable storyline makes the whole movie enjoyable.

The Other Boleyn Girl

Despite the obvious hystorical inaccuracies, mediocre script and Scarlet Johansson's devolving acting the movie works well as a soap operatic guilty pleasure. Top-notch costume design, score and art direction.

La Vie en Rose (La Mome)

A movie so emotionally raw and moving that they forgot to hire an editor. Marion Cotillard is just as remarkable as this movie is long.

Nowhere in Africa (Nirgendwo in Afrika)

Juliane Koehler has done a lot of excellent German films, and this is her best since Aimee and Jaguar. A stunning and unique angle on the displacement of Jews during the Holocaust. Stunning cinematography.

Michael Clayton

Despite the clumsy editing this is one of the best 'talkies' to come around since The Insider. A rich man's Grisham ;-)

Jumper
Jumper(2008)

An actioneer teetering into mediocrity. Only holds your interest for a short while with its visual effects before you realize there's nothing going on.

Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street

Artsy, neo-goth, and ultimately passable fare. If you don't like musicals, avoid this one primarily as it has one of the least memorable collection of songs. Could have been better.

Atonement
Atonement(2007)
½

Superd acting, juicy script, stylistic direction and steller cinematography make for a highly enthralling and carefully reigned melodrama. The stunning score also elevates the entire film to an even higher level. If only the editing wasn a bit more tight.

Malena
Malena(2000)
½

An unabashed coming of age story that strictly adheres to it's Italian roots creating a highly evocative and touching tale. Those Italian women are really worth watching out!

Cloverfield
Cloverfield(2008)

*FOR THOSE WHO HAVENT SEEN: Keep a close watch on the last Coney Island flashback scenes*
One of those few movies that seem awsome the first time you see it but when you think about it, it doesnt feel as spectacular. It's simply a Blair Witch meets The Host... and some exciting scares.

Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story
½

Classic nonsensical comedy! Absolutely one-dimensional plot but highly entertaining. The acting and the music are it's high points. And, yes, the title song will reaffrim your faith in Judaism ;-)

Elizabeth: The Golden Age
½

The horny queen of England. The Golden Age is reduced to a predictable soap opera. And quite facinating how the movie portrays the villains as hideous and mentally unstable. But the high production quality is distracting enough to make the film fairly entertaining.

Juno
Juno(2007)

It's defnitely a well written movie... but Ellen Page's wittiness and one-liners feel to mature for someone her age to be despensing. However, the supporting cast and a fairly predictable but satsifying ending makes the movie quite enjoyable.

Jesus Camp
Jesus Camp(2006)
½

Jesus Christ! Great and unbiased view of Christian Fundamentalists (or extremists, rather) and a How-To on raising children wrong. Christians, don't throw rocks if you live in glass houses ;-)

Message in a Bottle

One of the best girly-sapfest movie. Great soundtrack and great acting from W Penn. Watch it with someone you're attracted to for some after screening rewards... or watch it with a friend and whine.

National Treasure: Book of Secrets
½

Pretty fun for something so far fetched and slightly better than the original. Even if you're not interested in American history (like I am) it's still decent entertainment, if not simplistic.

I Am Legend
I Am Legend(2007)

Two thirds of the movie is a top notch psycholgical thriller delving into isolation and agoraphobia. The final act is pretty much Deus Ex Machina. If they only stuck with the distopian and philosphical view of the source material they would have had a unique masterpiece.

Enchanted
Enchanted(2007)

Considering it's core target, Enchanted is a solid hit. For the rest of us Enchanted has enough mature wit and satyrical humour despite the overly cute delivery. However, the song and dance numbers forcibly rekindle the Menken/Ashman zeitgeist and marginally succed.

The Golden Compass

LOL - the BCE Place is the Magesterium (evil church organization)'s headquarters! Seriously, though, the storyline structure is clunky making some scenes either perfect or awkward. I dont know why the dirctor chose this path, as the plot in the book was perfectly coherent. But Nicole Kidman is worth the price of admition.

The Mist
The Mist(2007)
½

Defnitely the best B movie of the year in terms of cinematography and even acting -- still a big B though (for, um, bugs?). Big suprise (except the somewhat predictable and forcibly pragmatic ending).

Beowulf
Beowulf(2007)

Despite the cheesy (and flawed) CGI, Beowulf is suprisingly dark, thrilling, homoerotic and even epic. Great soundtrack and art direction. Angelina seems to be channeling her Olympias character from Alexander -- right down to the accent and Oedipus undertone.

Saw IV
Saw IV(2007)
½

Ugh. The most unconvincing ending ever! And only two of the 'traps' a greusome enough to be memorable. The series should end here...

The Passion of the Christ

Imagine the movies Saw or Hostel set in Biblical times and you'll get PotC. The two stars are for the spot on Arameic and Latin and the other for the acting prowess of Maia Morgenstern. Oh, and baby Satan was priceless!

Sharkwater
Sharkwater(2007)

A great eye-opener for those who persistantly allude to Jaws when it comes to sharks: their just like dogs! And the narrator kinda reminds me of Ross Hull...

Evening
Evening(2007)
½

Damn, what's happening with Cunningham's movies. The cast sorta makes up for it -- but Collette, Streep and Close cant do shit with a dead script.

Downfall (Der Untergang)

Stunning depiction of the last days of Hitler and his regime. Stellar performances from Koehler and Ganz. Feels very epic and claustrophobic at the same time...

The Invasion
The Invasion(2007)
½

Has its moments of fright and intrigue and is better than the original on certain parts. But, boy, are these aliens preachy!

Zeitgeist: The Movie

Not sure if this is a movie or a documentary -- but it states SOME clear facts. Very suspicious on how to react, exactly. The entire movie seems to be one-sided yet their audacity feels justifiable.

The Bourne Ultimatum

Definitely the best of the three, with the most fun fight scenes. The gran revelantions aint so grand, though. And the ending is suspicious and lacking. But still worth it!

Stardust
Stardust(2007)
½

A fantasy film if there ever was one. And De Niro's gay pirate adds a bit of color and the ending is quite enthralling.

Becoming Jane
½

You've seen one Jane Austin movie, you've seen them all! Thankfully, the ending is pure poetry and salvages the emotional agenda the director was intending at the begining.

Heung joh chow heung yau chow (Turn Left, Turn Right)
½

One of the most original romantic comedies (built around coincidences and irony). The cheese factor isn't as high considering it's an Asian import.

Topsy-Turvy
Topsy-Turvy(1999)

The mediocre story diminishes when compared to Leigh's masterful script that captures the essence of late 17th century Old English society. Spot-on acting and mesmerizing art direction. A bit highbrow for most.

Paradise Now
Paradise Now(2005)

Moving and insightful with excellent actors. The ending is very callenging.

Dixie Chicks - Shut Up and Sing
½

Forget Hillary Clinton, Natalie Maines should be the next US president! She's got more balls than any guy out there... I wish we were friends ;-) Oh, and the ending seems abrupt (as if they forcibly ended the documentary to coencide with the release if their album)

Who Killed the Electric Car?

A corney and ultimately sad revelation on the shady existnce and death of the electric car.

Dolores Claiborne
½

An underated classic. A forced ending dampens things a bit, but the performances are the best.

Misery
Misery(1990)

King at his wicked best. Bates really nails (and hammers) the role of an atypical psycho.

Hard Candy
Hard Candy(2006)

Good setup but the ending feels contrived. Page's acting is sometimes unconvincing but Wilson nails it as a pedophile.

No Reservations

This is a perfectly bland and mundane romantic dramedy that has a few emotional lows but absolutey no exhilirating highs. And makes you hungry after!

The Simpsons Movie
½

This is exactly what you would expect from the Simpsons: crass humour and socio-political satire. The movie slightly drags too long (one can only take so much comedy).

Hairspray
Hairspray(2007)

If you dont like black people now, you will love them after watching. The morales enofrced are obvious but commendable. The acting is the best part followed by the music.

Little Children
½

A disturbingly sweet, funny and generally facinating film. Great characterization and evolved well away from the novel. And Wilson is... ;-)

For Your Consideration

While not the best Chris Guest outing, it does have its memorable moments. So watch it but don't expect too much. As always, excellent work primarily from the female cast (especially O'Hara)

The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe

As a fan of the book I wasn't all too thrilled with the live action incarnation. Tilda Swinton gives a memorable performance and the battle sequence ranks among film history's best.

Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix
½

As an illiterate of the franchise this is by far the best of the movie series. So much fun with a hint of darkness and maturity. Rowling should be commended for not dumbing down the story for the sake of the target. And Imelda Staunton should recieve accolades for her spicy role.

Transformers
Transformers(2007)

Despite the awful dialogue, ridiculous story and nauseating product placements Transformers delivers the goods! Awesome action sequences oozing with testosterone -- even if you have ovaries you'll still be pumping!

Sicko
Sicko(2007)

Suspiciously gratifying! Moore does a lot of showboating still, but he drives a very good point. Its amazing how people act in front of a rolling camera though ;-)

To Wong Foo, Thanks for Everything! Julie Newmar

Obviously conservative and antiseptic to avoid making the massess feel uncomfrtoable. Kudos to the fine actors who were really commited. A few redeeming qualities: acting and humour suprisingly balances things out. Still, this could have been a classic!.

Somewhere in Time

The greatest lovestory based on quantum physics! Seriously, it hits the mark in terms of mushiness and overacting. However, the great music and set design saves this piece from contrived melodrama hell.

While You Were Sleeping

Predictably sweet and innocent. Great ensamble cast and perfectly cheesy for a romantic night.

Notes on a Scandal
½

Riveting performances and a very juicy script makes this a very memorable experience. Really showcases the actress' honed craft.

Walk on Water
½

A very moving experience (Jewish hitman befriends the garndson of a Nazi). The complexity of the story lends itself to the source material quite well. This is why European films rock!

Aimée & Jaguar

Riveting WWII love story of sorts. Captures the essence of the era perfectly.

Year of the Dog

Starts off really well -- perfectly spot on humour! But slowly trundles down and becomes a melodrama in the end. Molly Shannon is still the saving grace!

Angela's Ashes

A good send up of the book; really captures the depression on the source material. Awsome acting as well.

The Crying Game
½

The last great Film Noir -- as dark and twisted as you can get! Great script and acting.

Ninja Scroll
Ninja Scroll(1995)

The most effectively gratuitous anime out there. Excellent character design and fight scenes. The third act is somewhat of a let down.

Altered States

The most effective psychological horror along with Silence of the Lambs. Unfortunately, it gets too complex and psychological for its own good in the end...

Nausicaä of the Valley of the Wind (Kaze no tani no Naushika)

A stunning masterpiece: prophetic story, complex characters, engrossing music and gorgrous animation. One of the most perfect movie exeperiences out there!

Ratatouille
Ratatouille(2007)

Starts off slow, then accelerates fast and finishes with a big bang! Also suffers from Aesop syndrome -- painfully obvious storyline morals that get distracting.

Stargate
Stargate(1994)
½

The epitome of guilty pleasures! Excellent art direction, score and set design. Awsome casting too (Jaye Davidson?!)

Toy Story 2
Toy Story 2(1999)

Suprisingly better than the original. The complex storyline and witty script elevates this sequal.

The Little Mermaid

The simplicity of the story, music and characterization makes this a true classic.

The Sixth Sense
½

A post-modern execution on a placid storyline. Aided by excellent acting and script.

All the Little Animals

A rarity in the industry: the movie amazingly captures the innocence of the story and handles the tragic ending commendably.

The Exorcist
The Exorcist(1973)

A true Hollywood classic: script, score, direction, performance -- all high calibre. Some issues with the editing though...

Pollock
Pollock(2000)

Riviting! Excellent performances and spot-on direction

Knocked Up
Knocked Up(2007)
½

I'm glad I was dragged to watch this movie -- amazing writing and acting!

1408
1408(2007)

Stephen King is the king of uniquly structured horror storylines (and freightfully ironic endings).

Evan Almighty

Dull script; flat jokes; predictable and forced storyline.

Hostel Part II
½

Not as good as the first. Obviously trying to fix the mistakes of the original, ends up being somewhat funny and stupid...

Shortbus
Shortbus(2006)

Ironically, certain aspects of the story is more gratuitous than the sex scenes. Bottomline, the evolution of a story-driven porn flick.

Ocean's Thirteen

Definitely better than the second. Killer fun!!

The Hours
The Hours(2002)
½

Gripping and unabashedly pretentious. Juicy script and exquisite performances.

Spider-Man 3
Spider-Man 3(2007)

Some exciting scenes, but the story feels forced and some of the acting is stiff

Pirates of the Caribbean: At Worlds End

Fun and exciting but too long and convoluted