Rotten Tomatoes has a foundation built on silly putty. If the collective voice can give Alien: Covenant 70%, but Valerian only 51%, then thereâ(TM)s something wrong with the whole circus. As William Goldman says, Nobody Knows Anything, and is especially correct with the opinionated know-alls who litter RT with their wildly off-target verdicts. Split 74%!!!!! 7% of professional critics gave Dunkirk the thumbs-down. Itâ(TM)s like watching Pointless with questions like, What is the capital of England, (âIâ(TM)ll give you a clue. You live there.â?) and a percentage of the hundred people donâ(TM)t know the answer. I ask myself, Who are these dumboes? It beggars belief.
I thoroughly enjoyed Valerian. It gets 78% in my evaluation. The dialogue is fine, the actors carry the film well and the imaginative visuals overspill in a magical sense. Great to watch in 3D. It does have a problem in the latter half of Act Two when the story digresses to a pointless capture/escape mini-adventure, and Rihanna makes a very rude appearance which makes the film unsuitable for children. But this chapter could easily be cut from the two hour plus running time. It would lower the classification, open the film to a wider audience, and make for a neater, shorter (and cheaper) movie. I have a feeling this was the directorâ(TM)s favourite scene, which is a shame. A little more self-discipline and the RT ratings would be higher. But that, as far Iâ(TM)m concerned, is its only flaw. I loved the laser fights and recalled my awe watching Disneyâ(TM)s The Black Hole in my young days. There was no rudeness then, and no want for it either. Itâ(TM)s sad how weâ(TM)ve â~moved onâ(TM) in some ways. There are Avatar nips, but theyâ(TM)re harmless. BBC documentaries on Zulus have shown more (and bigger) and theyâ(TM)ve never caused offence.
Overall, it was a thrilling ride. From the get-go it was enthralling and I hope it does well at the box office. If only the REVIEWERS held themselves with the same restraint as Luc Besson sometimes lacks. Take my advice, say, Bollocks to Rotten Tomatoes and go see a fantastic 78% Sci-Fi wonderfest.