whosinthenews's Profile - Rotten Tomatoes

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Rating History

The Castle of Fu Manchu
2 years ago via Flixster

I've seen a lot of terrible films, and so I don't say this lightly... Castle of Fu Manchu is the worst movie ever created. It has no redeeming value whatsoever. It's not silly enough to laugh at. The plot is incomprehensible garble. The camera zooms in and out inexplicably while stuffy British wankers mumble stuff about things happening to people in places. Deeeeeeep Hurting.

For Your Eyes Only
3 years ago via Flixster

I think people think this is better than it actually is because it's sandwiched between two of the most ridiculous Bond films; Moonraker and Octopussy, making this relatively normal outing seem brilliant by comparison. Lest we forget...

1. FIGURE SKATING.
2. Evil hockey players.
3. Blofeldt falling from a helicopter into a chimney (while in a wheelchair).
4. The super awesome "attack of the dune buggies" scene.
5. Comic relief parrot.
6. Comic relief Margaret Thatcher.
7. A non-existent plot that goes nowhere
8. Weird figure skating nymph who tries to get into Bond's pants.

Star Trek
Star Trek (2009)
3 years ago via Flixster
½

Feels fresh while still maintaining certain Star Trek traditions...like including the ever convenient time travel plot device; which actually works for once since they didn't base the entire plot around it. That, and the fact that it's necessary in restarting the original series while not taking a poo poo on decades worth of material (thus resulting in a fanboy apocalypse).
The only major con to this film (besides the overall sense of it being an uber condensed, steroid-addled, joyride version of the original TV show for the attention deficient masses; one that barely resembles Trek in any form) is Eric Bana's lackluster and unmotivated performance as the Romulan villain. This is always a challenge to avoid in the Star Trek universe anyway and usually remedied through endless exposition to give characters their depth, but was clearly one of the sacrifices in bringing audiences a faster paced Trek experience. But I mean really, how many times can a Star Trek film get away with the recycled plot of: doomsday device being wielded by crazed villain in mad attempt at revenge, which is then foiled by the Enterprise crew. It's beyond played out at this point. The crew of the Enterprise are not the Fantastic 4. They are NOT X-Men in space.
Nu-Trek is refreshing, however, as long as you're not induced into a fanboy rage over how little it keeps with the original spirit of Star Trek. I believe the changes, though often hollow and vacuous for the internet age, do give new life to a DOA series: one that had overstayed its welcome and was in desperate need of revamping. But, to quote Lucas "we may have gone too far in a few places".

The Last Stand
3 years ago via Flixster

Movie A: Forest Whitaker and his team of Federal agents track down a most wanted fugitive in a serious action thriller. Movie B: Arnold and his hodgepodge team of small town yokel law enforcement engage in hi-jinks. Movie C: An extended Chevy Camaro commercial (you will notice it conspicuously located next to Arnold's left foot on the poster. Seriously, if companies are going to try and sell me s*** while I'm watching a movie then they should at least cut the ticket prices in half) At about forty minutes in; movies A, B and C collide, resulting in one of the laziest, most poorly directed, worst sounding, incomprehensible sack of assorted rubbish that ever tried to pass itself off as a movie. The good news is that this will sit on the shelf nicely next to Steven Seagal's recent direct-to-video crap-fests.

And really? This was seriously directed by the guy who did 'Tale of Two Sisters'? Inconceivable.