Mikey Przyszlak's Movie Ratings - Rotten Tomatoes

Movie Ratings and Reviews

Your Name. (Kimi No Na Wa.)
½

Every frame is a piece of art. I am so happy I didn't skip this one.

Live By Night
½

Great movie, severly underrated. A shame.

The Escort
The Escort(2015)

Yeah it's a Very romantic, slightly comedy. It is really well made though, that or I'm growing a vagina...

Silence
Silence(2017)
½

I'm an atheist, but I have to say there's something here. There is no way to really describe what this movie is about, but the experience is great. It is a great movie I wouldn't have watched if I cared about people's opinions.

Passengers
Passengers(2016)

Trailer is very deceiving. That is the only reason I didn't like it that much. It's really good. But it's a romance above all. It's an undercover chick flick

Rogue One: A Star Wars Story

THIS IS F-U-C-K-I-N-G IT. Saw it 3 times already.

Café Society
½

Extremely well done. You will love everything the producers wanted you to love and you will hate everything they designed for you to hate. Brilliant really.

The Magnificent Seven
½

Something was missing. But in no way am I saying? it is bad

Wong gok hak yau (One Night in Mongkok)

Wow... so different. So incredibly well made. So shocking. I love HK cinema.

Hell or High Water

Nice movie, but can't see why it is being described as something extraordinary. I mean it was great but didn't seem to do anything new.

Paterson
Paterson(2016)

It really sounds silly on paper, and it is really weird to watch but you can't help but feel good about this movie and it makes you think about many things you usually don't notice

Arrival
Arrival(2016)

Not your typical powerful blockbuster. It's pacing is perfect but I expected something stronger. As it is, this movie is just perfect.

Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them

Just a bad movie with really crappy special effects and low level CGI.
I didn't like the previous Harry Potter movies (even though they were all of high quality and enjoyable) all that much and I'am not invested in the universe. With this title I expected something better. Especially after these reviews.

Bad Moms
Bad Moms(2016)

Fun and funny enough.

Sausage Party

The depth of jokes will surely go unnoticed by many. The jokes I noticed were so subtle and well educated in both culture and history that I can only wonder how much of this great comedy have I missed for lack of knowledge on history and international politics

Our Kind of Traitor
½

Loved every second of it. Such a fresh movie after all that overdone bullshit lately...

Warcraft
Warcraft(2016)
½

Why is everyone hating it so much? I thought it was amazing. Was it a groundbraking storytelling masterpiece? NO. Was it an amazing ride from start to finish with special EFX that wowed me many times? Definitely YES. It is awesome. I gave 4,5 because it was impossible to pull it off (a Warcraft based movie? Not easy) and they did great. Can't wait for the sequel.

The Man in the White Suit

Only people who ever tried changing something will feel Sidney's pain. This movie depicts this experience incredibly well

American Sniper

If you read about it online, you'll find out that it's not very true to the real biography of Kyle, who seemed to hate "savages" and had no regard for their lives. This is cinema though, and it was a brilliant movie. Sure it's not all black and white like in it, but the enjoyment it brings to viewers is something worthy of praise

Hardflip
Hardflip(2012)

anyone involved in making of this... "movie" should think of doing something else, or nothing at all ever again.

Need For Speed
½

Yeah I liked it. Kill me. I don't care!

How to Train Your Dragon 2

It's insane how cool this movie is

The Man From Nowhere
½

Another great movie from Korea.

Enemy
Enemy(2014)
½

I must admit I was one of those, who during the last scene, were terrified at first and then screamed "What the fuck!?". This was the first time in my life when I had to watch a 30 minutes long youtube explanation of a movie's story. It is amazing once you get it... mind blowing even. It's also terrifying to see yourself in the main character, who comes to the same conclusions about himself as you have about yourself. Insanely good.

The Giver
The Giver(2014)

Loved it - don't know why everyone is so disappointed

Fruitvale Station

The saddest movie after Grave of the Fireflies

Jackass Presents: Bad Grandpa
½

It's made of hilarious moments held together by a borring plot. To a point that for me half way through, it was unbearable.

A Simple Life
½

Makes you want to rethink, well ...everything

Something from Nothing: The Art of Rap

Beautiful (honestly incredible) urban shots and nice stories. For me the only problem is not what's in the movie, but what isn't - names like Keith Edward, Kool Herc, etc. are way too important to skip. It is , however, a great documentary in it's own right.

Les Misérables

Should've seen it in the movie theater... damn. No seriously, what a shame...

Waiting For Lightning
½

I'm blown away.
No, I'm blown to pieces.
Danny Way makes every other guy that ever lived look like a silly little bitch.

Koto no ha no niwa (Garden of Words)

It reminded me of what's so special about anime. The surreal visuals accompanied by the beautiful piano soundtrack combine with a story that's sure to tear right through your defenses and get straight to your most profound memories. Once this movie is done with you, all that's left is a bitter taste of sincere nostalgia. The kind of feeling, I would call quite typical for any good anime drama.

Bullet to the Head
½

It's just stupid. Stallone doesn't even look human anymore (HINT: work on your lower body Sly). Nothing here makes sense and when it does for a second, the next minute it looses integrity. I'd rather get that bullet to the head than think about this hopeless shit any more. RATING: AVOID

The Last Stand
½

Nice B-class movie with Arnie.

White House Down
½

Great for what it is. Worth watching just for some oldschool fun.

World War Z
World War Z(2013)
½

'thiiiis iiiiiis fuuuuckin' aweeeeesooooome"

The Grandmaster
½

This is the Casablanca of Kung Fu movies. The narrative gets somewhat chaotic at times because it's switching between 3 main characters, but the overall impact of the story, it's beautiful setting and the Kung Fu fights, is delivered with deadly precision and full force.
Great piece of art.

Superman Unbound
½

Really nice. And damn that Superman's cousin is hot... But marriage? Come on...

I'm So Excited!
½

A few moments where you'll laugh is pretty much all you get here. If you a fan of Almodovar's slow style then you'll probably love it. I expect movies to be entertaining. This one is terribly borring.

Celeste and Jesse Forever

Never thought I'd say this but here goes:
I have truly enjoyed a romantic-comedy. I also thought it was smart and funny. Whats more surprising, however, is that not a single cliché was found during the process.

There you have it - my first and probably last time.

G.I. Joe: Retaliation

What a waste of time, potential and money...

The Host
The Host(2013)

Ever wondered what "Twilight" would be like if they made it 100% Sci-Fi?
Well look no more - this terrible, hopeless and often unintentionally funny crap of a movie is your answer.

John Dies at the End
½

It's just insane. But definitely worth watching.

Kon Tiki
Kon Tiki(2013)
½

Brilliant. True beauty of the ocean > overdone CG ocean (looking at you "Life of Pi")

This is 40
This is 40(2012)

It's OK, but can be terribly boring at times. It's also filled with clichés and stereotypes. Other than that it's decent.

The Odd Life of Timothy Green

It's pretty weird and doesn't make a whole lot of sense when you think about it, but what it lacks in credibility, it makes up for in pure enjoyment. It's a pleasure to watch. It is beautifully shot and scored, plus it will hook you from the very first moment and won't let go till the end credits roll. Definitely worth a watch. Another testament to what I like to point out very often - you can have great storytelling even with poor story (like in this movie) or you can have an exceptional story ruined by terrible storytelling (Life of Pi for instance).

It's Kind of a Funny Story

Watching a movie you've never heard of, with no expectations, not having a clue of what it is about or who made it? it's a great way to end up blown away or extremely disappointed. So imagine my surprise when this slowly developing movie got me hooked, then loaded me with pure optimism and during it's climax (probably the best part of this awesome movie) decided to play that one song I consider to be THE soundtrack to my life. Yep. I'm blown away/ knocked the fuck out. This baby's going straight to my personal hall of fame.

Goon
Goon(2012)

It's just awesome. Nothing groundbreaking or even above average but somehow it just rocks. It's like it wants to remind us why fun is fun. Why? "Because f*#k you that's why"

Lincoln
Lincoln(2012)
½

Powerful and inspiring as Spielberg's new movie is, it is the true story behind it that makes it remarkable. It's one of those rare moments in history, where reality was so much more epic than fiction. And even though decades have passed, we get to experience it first hand at the comfort of our theaters and homes. This is what people love about cinema.

How To Stop Being A Loser
½

There are a few moments where you'll roll your eyes or even want them to just stop, but other than that its really OK.

The Paperboy
The Paperboy(2012)

Great movie . One that will seriously fuck you up, and you'll love it for it.

Broken City
Broken City(2013)
½

Slow at times but definitely not bad. Mark Whalberg however is getting boring... I'd love to see him playing someone other than a cop, a guy that was betrayed or his favourite - a cop/soldier that was betrayed.

Mirror Mirror

It's OK. Has it's moments too. You will not, however, miss on anything great if you watch something else.

The Master
The Master(2012)

A disappointment. The story is almost nonexistent here. There's no progress of the narrative. At the end of the movie you'll be waiting for it to start. Some call it a brilliant psychological drama. I call it a beautifully shot and incredibly well acted waste of 2 hours and 18 minutes. Maybe it's charm simply eludes me, because frankly, all those critics can't be wrong.

The Flowers of War

Great production values, great performances and "no bullshit" attitude to violence. Personally I've truly enjoyed it, however, I'm not the type to overanalyse my entertainment. You might have issues with this one, if your inquisitive nature handicaps your ability to simply enjoy the unfolding story. Especially while it unfolds over it's often "not-entirely-realistic" script. As a side note, it sure is weird seeing C. Bale returning to the "Empire of the Sun" (1983) era as a grown man. Weird in a good way.

Rock of Ages
Rock of Ages(2012)

Not as cool as it's trailer would make you believe. It's fun though, fun, really enjoyable and let's face it, we do love rock'n'roll

The Words
The Words(2012)
½

Loved it. Every second of it.

Brave Hearts: Umizaru
½

Incredibly inspirational and well made. Might seem a bit goofy if you're not familiar with japanese culture.

21 And Over
21 And Over(2013)
½

Nice - but not good enough.

Playing for Keeps

Don't know where all the "hate" is coming from. It was a very pleasurable and enjoyable experience. A really good movie.

ParaNorman
ParaNorman(2012)

Remarkable visuals. Original too.

Searching for Sugar Man
½

Here, i's all about the story, and what a story this is.

Tim Burton's Corpse Bride
½

In a word - incredible. Thank God for the people who are still willing to finance that kind of originality.

Shanghai
Shanghai(2015)

Whether you like it or not is irrelevant. What this movie achieves in recreating the 1940's Shanghai is nothing short of amazing. Also the Blu-ray transfer is just mind-blowing. The movie itself seems like a modern take on Casablanca. It's a pleasure to watch but it's storyline is not it's strongest point. To say it's weak or mediocre, however, would be a major understatement. It's just not on par with the visual splendour. You owe it to yourself to watch this one - if good, but not great plot isn't enough for you, do it for the eye-candy.

From Up On Poppy Hill

Really sweet movie. The visuals are mindblowing.

Traitor
Traitor(2008)

What kind of fucked up idiot gives away crucial plot information in a short preview about the movie? Rotten tomatoes people do. Thank God I haven't read it before watching. Him being the undercover CIA agent is revealed late in the movie and all you have up till that point are doubts. Great movie BTW.

Life of Pi
Life of Pi(2012)
½

I'm truly disappointed. To put that much CG into that kind of movie is just lazy. In more than 50% of the movie they didn't even take normal shots to supplement them with CG. It's Pure CG. And it's been proven time and time again that people can tell the difference. The tiger, pretty much the main character of the movie, is unrealistic and artificial. The plot? Wasted potential. This movie should be a subject of every filmmaking school to show that the story and the storytelling are two different things. The story is amazing here, but the storytelling is terrible. The way it is told makes it weirdly fragmented and viewers get detached more than once. It's by no means a bad movie - I'm just really disappointed.

Casa de mi padre
½

"Nice touches" all over this thing. Has some great moments and occasionally makes fun of the movie industry in a spectacular way.

The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey

Better than the LOTR movies and more faithful to the original material - nice improvement.

The Sitter
The Sitter(2011)

"Make luuuuuv to the night mothafucka" ahahahha awesome movie

Catch .44
Catch .44(2011)
½

What a F#%$!N mess...

I Am Number Four

Sweeeeeet! DuĹ 1/4o lepszy niĹ 1/4 myĹ>laĹ,em no i +200 KUDOS za Ducati.

The Campaign
The Campaign(2012)
½

Really smart in it's dumbness

Chasing Mavericks

I loved every second of it. Another brilliant movie that noone will see. Truly inspiring. I'm really impressed. It's Butlers best movie since the 300.

Drive Angry
Drive Angry(2011)

Nie powiem ?ebym si? na nim nudzi? ale strasznie s?aby ogólnie

Life as We Know It
½

It's OK I guess.

For me it was quite bearable until "she" trashed his motorcycle and he just said "it's OK, don't worry". I mean... in what crazy-ass-insane-outta-this-world circumstances would a man say that to a bitch that's just massacred (yes massacred - the screenwriter went really far with this shit) his god damned bike?
And NO! That kind of love does not exist. C'mon his bike man. WTF?
That hurt my feelings. I'm going to cry now...

Argo
Argo(2012)

loved every second of it.

Anna Karenina
½

Brilliant at first, "OK" in the middle and boring through the last 1/3. That's what I think. Maybe it's because I'm a guy. But if they could keep that funky, fresh mix of gorgeous transitions for a bit longer, it would be way more entertaining. As it is, it's got some serious pacing issues. In the second half it's so slow, at times it seems like it will never end. But the potential here was enormous and the first half of the movie easily proves it. It's worth seeing just for that.

Looper
Looper(2012)
½

Brilliant, slightly flawed but brilliant. I can't stop thinking that this would've made a great trilogy. It seemed like there was this amazing story yet it was way too long for one movie. Or maybe it's the way they edited the movie - there were times when I was slightly bored. Anyhow, Looper is so original, fresh and entertaining that anyone who skips it, is a criminal. It's enough that you bastards killed John Carter.

Skyfall
Skyfall(2012)

Even though I did enjoy two previous Bond movies, they didn't really provide what I would call a "Bond experience". The good news is, Skyfall more than delivers on all fronts. You've probably heard that it's the best Bond movie ever ...Well it definitely is.
And when that kind of hype creates incredible expectations, you go to see it expecting at least the holy grail of entertainment. But it will still surprise you.

How so?

Well for starters It has that typical Bond feel that everyone believed to have forever been lost, a brilliant, complex villain that's pure evil (but has his rational reasons too) and it's edited and shot in a very unique way. It makes you feel like you're watching a 70' film shot with todays technology.
Oh, and don't even get me started on those gorgeous surreal locations...
Actually this entire movie is as surreal as you'd expect a true Bond movie to be, yet at the same time it's not even half as over the top as the two previous ones (not to mention the ones with Brosnan). And on top of all that they've somehow managed to squeeze in a ton of oldschool references and fan service.

I had never expected this movie to be this good. I don't remember the last time I was so surprised by a new entry in long standing series.

It's not just a great movie. It's a glorious tribute to all previous Bond movies. This right here is a masterpiece.

The Rocketeer
½

I love this movie :)

That's My Boy
½

Adam Sandler does his hopeless "voice-thing" here, but the plot and humor are so strong that it changes nothing.

The Guard
The Guard(2011)
½

Fuckin' brilliant!

The Dark Knight Rises
½

almost as disappointing as The Avengers

Cosmopolis
Cosmopolis(2012)

Left the theater 3 minutes before the ending (whatever it was) - just couldn't stand it anymore

Day of the Falcon
½

To say that I am crazy in love with this movie is a major understatement. I used to be the guy screaming "they don't make those any more!", and guess what? They just did :)

Fucking amazing, Thaaaank you!

The Dictator
The Dictator(2012)

Monkeys on the rollerskates, 911 2012 - instant classic :)
Aladeen Mothafuckaa

Marvel's The Avengers
½

A major dissappointment...

Battleship
Battleship(2012)
½

10/10 for the entertainment, but yes, it is a huge clichĂ (C). The glorious sound of AC/DC mixed with amazing destruction is what makes it worth watching.

Like Crazy
Like Crazy(2011)

LIKE CRAZY = TWO FOR THE ROAD 2

Ben-Hur
Ben-Hur(1959)

Image clarity and Technicolor-look in the Bluray Edition turn this incredible undertaking into a moving XV century painting. It's unbelievable how surreal this thing looks in motion. The scope and resources that have been put into this movie in '59 have not gone to waste.

Green Lantern
½

Actually way better than I expected.

Faster
Faster(2010)

Niski rating a przyjemny nieprzecietnie...

Love and Other Drugs
½

Jake saves this "overclichĂ (C)d" movie.

Guess Who's Coming to Dinner
½

It's 2011 and it's actually incredible. Must have been absolutely amazing in late'60

Carnage
Carnage(2011)

nothing so real should ever be so funny - incredible

The Adventures of Tintin
½

Amazing CG - incredible. Story is great , but the pacing and "storytelling" is slow and retarded. Makes you wonder what a great Indiana Jones movie it could be...

The Debt
The Debt(2011)
½

OutFUCKINstanding

The Tree of Life

Albo brakuje mi do?wiadcze? ?yciowych, albo Terrence'owi talentu. Przekombinowane i nawet kino w Máladze (w którym po raz pierwszy zobaczy?em projekcje w 4k) nie pomog?o.
Fajny klimat za to jest...

Conan the Barbarian

W trakcie ogladania jest zaaajebisty.

Senna
Senna(2011)

The Muhammad Ali of F1. 10/10

Summer Wars (Sama Wozu)
½

Jak co? tak bezsensownego mo?e by? tak niesamowicie wybitnym epickim dzie?em? Tylko Nippon'skie kino to potrafi. Kocham ten film :)

Larry Crowne
Larry Crowne(2011)

Julia w tym filmie to czyste z?o - zajebista jest :)

The Town
The Town(2010)

Dawno tak filmu nie prze?ywa?em - es de puta madre tios

The Hangover Part II
½

Tak, jest powtórzony schemat. Tak pojawiaj? si? te same postaci. Nie, to w?asnie zajebi?cie, bo zrobili to z klas? i pozamiatali bezlito?nie. Recenzenci s? niedojebani.

Hall Pass
Hall Pass(2011)
½

Hangoover to przy tym gowno - szok co oni powymyslali w tym filmie. Wzieli przyklad z najlepszych - family guy i hangover. Nie moge uwierzyc ze ten film jest tak zajebisty

The Fighter
The Fighter(2010)

Rozkr?ca si? wolno samymi lewymi, ale ko?cówka to ostra wymiana w póldystansie :)

The Green Hornet
½

To nie komedia ale film genialny I LUV IT

Scott Pilgrim vs. the World
½

Outstanding CG work and mindblowing music - some of the fighting sequences are among the very best hollywood has to offer.

Patlabor: The Movie (Kidô keisatsu patorebâ: The Movie)

[PL] Kolejny wymiatacz Mamoru oshii...

[ENG] If you loved Ghost in the Shell the Movie or TV Series, you'll at least enjoy this one. It's old, but at times it looks gorgeous - especially the 1080p BD version. Music is fantastic. The plot itself is really cool and hard to predict.