In YourDreams' Rating of The Island

In Your's Review of The Island

4 years ago via Rotten Tomatoes
The Island

The Island(2005)

This movie gave me a splitting headache. Starts out great but quickly degenerates into typical brainless action shit. I liked the heroes dropping dumbbells on pursuing cars but only in a superficial kind of way. I dunno, Scarlett Johansson is quite pretty. What else. There is a scene in an elevator where one of the mercenaries says, "Tough day," and that is pretty much the extent of the character growth you can expect here. Poor Djimon Hounsou is grossly underutilized, as usual.

Maybe if you're twelve and you've never seen a Science Fiction movie before you will enjoy this. It is a story worth telling, but Michael Bay is not the man to tell it. Generally well made and acted, like all of Bay's work, but just too boringly predictable and obnoxiously spastic, like all of Bay's work. Why was Lincoln Six Echo remembering stuff that his host had lived out? The coolest premise in the movie and they never bother to explain it. Lazy!

Next to The Rock this is the best narrative Bay has had the opportunity to work with and unfortunately he chose to play it safe. Superimposing a dozen CGI hover trains into every shot will not convince me that I am observing a futuristic society. Other movies have done it since and done it better; the Total Recall reboot for example. You'd be better off watching the superior Fifth Element or Equilibrium if you're desperate for this kind of thing, with Logan's Run being the biggest "inspiration". Or just go watch Moon for the hundredth time, one of the better sci-fi's of the last decade, and the film that this movie is really ripping off.

Yes, I am aware The Island was made before Moon. It's still ripping it off. That's how bad of a movie this is. It's the Fisher-Price version of a neo-humanist tale, padded with endless chase scenes and explosions. Your brain deserves better.