Mr.Bo Ziffer's Rating of Faster

Mr.'s Review of Faster

6 years ago via Rotten Tomatoes
Faster

Faster(2010)

Once you've seen The Rock play a movie star with amnesia, a football player with an adorable daughter, or a tooth fairy, it's hard to take him seriously. "Faster" was his attempt to break from the family films and comedies and try to re-establish the bad-assery he displayed in The Scorpion King or The Rundown. It ain't happening.

In this movie, a getaway driver named Driver (The Rock) is released from prison after doing ten years time. From the other side, he is able to get information on the thugs who ambushed his team of bank robbers and killed his brother. After the first murder, a drug-addled cop named Cop (Billy Bob Thornton) takes the case and tracks Driver down, always a step behind. In addition, a killer named Killer (some British twat) is assigned to kill Driver before he can finish the job.

It astounds me how boring and slow a movie with the title "Faster" can be. There aren't really any action scenes. Driver shoots some walls; Cop walks through a hall; Killer talks to his therapist over the phone; Driver shoots Malachai from Children of the Corn; etc.

Killer is completely pointless and irrelevant to the plot. He was clearly shoe-horned in by one of the writers to try and pad the running time out. Billy Bob Thornton tries his best as a cop driven by duty, but The Rock's character sucks the excitement out of any and all action scenes. His lines of dialogue are few, but very poorly written.

But we don't watch for the dialogue: we want the big car chase! There has to be one, right? I mean, the movie's called "Faster"! The car was in all the trailers. Well, most of the time, Driver uses his awesome muscle car to drive five miles under the speed limit to his next target. He gets in one . . . count 'em, ONE . . . car chase with Killer that lasts for about a minute and a half, but that's it.

And if you havn't noticed, our main characters are named after their roles in the films, which I feel is needlessly complicated and confusing. When pitching this script, it must have been like a bad Abbott and Costello routine:

Writers: "So we got this guy, Driver . . . "
Execs: "Who is he?"
Writers: "He's Driver."
Execs: "We know that, but who is he?"
Writers: "We just told you. He's Driver. And he's being chased by Killer."
Execs: "Who is the killer?"
Writers: "Exactly."
Execs: "Oh, fuck off!"

In not so many words, it's over-plotted, yet dull and lifeless. It fails to take advantage of it's 70's Revenge Thriller inspirations, or even it's own title! Avoid at all costs.