Da 5 Bloods
On the Record
I May Destroy You
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Amy Schumer is hardly the first comedienne to talk about her vagina and day-to-day feminine issues on a major platform, but her no holds-barred, real approach is fresh. It's hilarious. And it's necessary. If anything, I hope this turns people on to her Comedy Central sketch comedy show, INSIDE AMY SCHUMER, whose recent season 3 premiere won me over with an absolutely sublime tsunami of merciless feminist comedy. TRAINWRECK is cute, it's sexy, hell, it really is a fantastic syrupy sweet date movie (with all the NBA cameos and pussy humor, you truly gotta love how hard this tries and, honestly, succeeds in catering/pandering to both genders), but it's ultimately Amy Schumer fitting her style into a mold, instead of trying to create an entirely new one.
The biggest source of conflict in MAGIC MIKE XXL is whether or not these guys will make a woman smile. Conceptually, it feels like it'd veer into exploitative and lascivious avenues, but it ends up being a determinedly and earnestly lustful picture about the ecstasy and compassion found in shared, consensual human pleasure. It's the most basely humanistic mainstream film I think I've ever seen.
Listen to what her fantasy is.
Give it to her.
Because you know you're gonna like it too.
Avant-garde in its joyous plotlessness, brimming with the sweetness and generosity in its huge heart, and voracious in its sexual appetite, the MAGIC MIKE franchise has become a beautiful one that serves as much, if not more, of a man's wish fulfillment fantasy as it is a woman's.
I challenge any dude to watch this film and not think "Hm... Yeah, it would be really cool to make a lady feel this way."
It also has Channing Tatum doing mid-air pushups using two girls' asses as grips, I mean, come the fuck on.
A brilliantly twisted whirlwind of plot, performance, and satire and surely a go-to film for men's rights activists.
Dangerous cinema: the most fascinating kind.
ALSO, BAHAHAHA, I DON'T KNOW WHICH IS SILLIER, BEN AFFLECK PLAYING A MEXICAN-AMERICAN OR BEN AFFLECK PLAYING A NEW YORKER
It feels like 9 films were leading up to this, 9 films to ease audiences into this crazy universe so Marvel could unleash this behemoth.
Better than THE AVENGERS.
While that film was far more of an event than a movie and had the far superior action, I'm only just now realizing that while it boasts a pretty cool as hell team, they're not a well-oiled machine. They don't rely on one another; when The Avengers met, it seemed to be mostly a matter of circumstance, not actual banding together as a unified group. They have a cool logo and a big skyscraper, but they're not a family.
The Guardians of the Galaxy, though? Now that is a fucking team.
And at the end of the day, when you're calling the game, the better team wins.
GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY is one of those great films that, in order to do it justice and accurately convey your enjoyment of it, can only be praised and reviewed by writing out a big ol' laundry list of your favorite moments.
p.s. that stinger hardcore trolled my audience