David Underwood's Movie Ratings - Rotten Tomatoes

Movie Ratings and Reviews

Under the Skin

I think I may kinda get it, if there is anything to get, sorta? Or maybe not. Either way, Under the Skin is captivating and visually stunning.

The Monuments Men

The story behind The Monuments Men is interesting. The movie, although it has amusing moments, mostly alternates between corny and drippy.

Gravity
Gravity(2013)
½

A very cool-looking movie, but not a good movie. I would especially not recommend it to those who: A. sat through the first few days of high school physics B. appreciate good writing.

Blue Jasmine
Blue Jasmine(2013)

A well-deserved Oscar win for Cate Blanchett.

Runner Runner

"Haphazardly assembled" is an understatement. What's worse, there are so many products I'm supposed to buy now that I can't keep track of them all.

Cloverfield
Cloverfield(2008)

Hey look, another found-footage movie. This one is more skillfully produced and more fun than most however.

Point Blank
Point Blank(2011)
½

A very solid thriller.

The Devil's Double

The plot isn't terribly exciting, but Dominic Cooper's performances are fantastic.

Color Me Kubrick

An interesting story and an okay film.

Maniac
Maniac(2013)

Interestingly shot, it very nearly makes one feel as if they were in the mind of a serial killer. And Elijah Wood is creepy to begin with.

The Ninth Gate
½

The story of The Ninth Gate lies somewhere between Indiana Jones and National Treasure. Not brilliant, but thoroughly entertaining.

Airborne
Airborne(2012)

Airborne is a kind of hospice for less successful Star Wars actors. Also it's really stupid. But that didn't stop me from watching it.

Parker
Parker(2013)

Jason Statham is cast as his usual type with a completely generic script, which makes for acceptable mindless entertainment. Could do without J.Lo however. She's just terrible.

Evangelion: 2.0 You Can (Not) Advance

As good as its predecessor, though the overtness Christian symbolism is a bit much.

Evangerion shin gekijôban: Jo (Evangelion: 1.0 You Are (Not) Alone) (Neon Gensis: Evangelion 1.01 You Are (Not) Alone)

Just as good as the series, but with much cooler CGI.

Swordfish
Swordfish(2001)
½

A big implausible exploding Hollywood movie, but mindlessly entertaining enough.

Carnage
Carnage(2011)

A ton of talent thrown in a pot and simmered along.

Elysium
Elysium(2013)

Elysium feels like an updated mix of early Schwarzenegger movies, complete with goofy Australian villain. Added in is a strong dose of heavy-handed political commentary. The visuals and action at least make it entertaining.

An Inconvenient Truth

I could do with less of Al Gore's reminiscing, but his presentation is interesting and informative. He should have better explained the units of measure in his graphs however. In fact some of them are missing y-axis labels entirely.

Quadrophenia
Quadrophenia(1979)

An engaging human story as well as a fascinating look at the Mods vs. Rockers subculture rivalry.

Being John Malkovich
½

Both silly funny and intelligently funny with a healthy dose of surreality. Fantastic.

Yi ngoi (Accident)

There's some pretty far-fetched Rube Goldberg action, but the story, performances, and cinematography make up for it.

The Lookout
The Lookout(2007)
½

Solidly tense, with interesting characters.

J. Edgar
J. Edgar(2011)

Interesting story, but not told very well.

Jack Frost
Jack Frost(1996)
½

Beyond words. A must-see for any comedy-horror fan.

We Were Soldiers
½

The melodrama detracts from the important story here, and the brutal violence is often cartoonish. There's just the right amount of Elliott, but the Gibson really needs to be dialed down.

Death at a Funeral
½

A lot of the gags are inanely silly, but as a whole it's a very funny movie.

The Collection
½

For what it is, the franchise is turning out to be pretty decent.

Oblivion
Oblivion(2013)

The visuals more than make up for any shortcoming in the story. Of course, I had no expectation of a story to begin with.

Little Miss Sunshine
½

There's an awful lot of stupid, but enough amusing-to-hilarious to balance it out. Bonus points for putting Bryan Cranston and Dean Norris in the same production.

Crossing Over
½

Heavy-handed is a mild descriptor. Crossing Over tries to be the Traffic of immigration, but it falls well short of the mark. Still, it has some entertainment value.

Only God Forgives

It's no Drive. However, it's still a morbidly fascinating trip, and Kristin Scott Thomas is brilliant. My appreciation increased when I noticed Gaspar Noe is thanked in the credits.

Phantom
Phantom(2013)

Ed Harris deserves better.

Europa Report

Enough with the found footage. That having been said, Europa Report really makes the most of a low budget. Still, it's not particularly remarkable, the script being mostly a cross between Alien and Abyss, and the science is terrible.

World War Z
World War Z(2013)

The plot isn't exactly great, but the ride is terrific. It's nice to see some fast-moving zombies that actually appear to be immediately threatening.

The Conjuring
½

Though it's pretty much a collage of previous horror movies, it's scary as hell, and well worth watching. It helps that the bulk of the scares come from what you don't see rather than what you do.

Deadfall
Deadfall(2012)

Wow, look at all that great acting talent wasted on a horrible script.

Up in the Air

Though it falls into plenty of cliches, Up in the Air is still largely clever and amusing, and it never hurts to have the Clooney charm.

The Texas Chainsaw Massacre
½

Intelligently done, especially for its time. Very deserving of its classic status.

The East
The East(2013)

Interesting subject matter but, though it has its moments, poorly executed. It's possible however that I just got sick of being preached to.

Puncture
Puncture(2011)
½

Think Erin Brockovich with a lot of hard drugs.

Four Brothers

Exceedingly stupid with no redeeming qualities.

Olympus Has Fallen
½

Very challenging to suspension of disbelief, but there are a lot of good action sequences. President Eckhart is such a moronic pussy that one wishes him harm, and he unfortunately survives.

Trance
Trance(2013)

Not Boyle's best work, but certainly worthwhile.

Side Effects
Side Effects(2013)

It's an engaging, twisty ride, but there's a sense of deja vu in that I've seen this plot somewhere before.

Collateral
Collateral(2004)

Collateral is entertaining enough, but it keeps you continuously and acutely aware that you are watching a Hollywood movie.

Caligula
Caligula(1979)

I admire the ambition to create a movie that has no censorship boundaries, but it didn't work. There's acting talent, but the end result is a haphazard patchwork of melodrama and pornography.

Napoleon Dynamite
½

It's not the world's greatest comedy, but it has its quirky charm.

Movie 43
Movie 43(2013)

I'm very slightly torn. There is a huge range of talent, and a decent number of genuinely funny moments. However, these are vastly overshadowed by fart, poop, and various other bodily function jokes.

Dark Skies
Dark Skies(2013)
½

It's riddled with cliches and generally lacks intelligence, but it's full of nice scares, and one gets to look at Keri Russell. Overall worth watching if approached with managed expectations.

Cloud Atlas
Cloud Atlas(2012)

It's not really a great movie, but Cloud Atlas is an amazing cinematic experience.

Boyz n the Hood

Solidly compelling, though often heavy-handed, and Fishburne's performance is excellent.

John Carpenter's Escape from L.A.

Haven't seen the first, wish I hadn't seen this one.

House at the End of the Street

Not coherent, not scary, and devoid of intelligent dialogue. One would think that having Jennifer Lawrence on the screen would soften the blow, but it only serves to intensify the anger. It's like watching a classic Ferrari in a demolition derby.

Star Trek Into Darkness

Into Darkness is an amazing cinematic experience, in which the style and action are equal to the first. Benedict Cumberbatch is fantastic, and it's really great to see the original meeting of Kirk and Khan. But, it goes too far. A nod to the original films is one thing, but there is so much rehashing of old scenes that it's off-putting.

Hunger
Hunger(2009)
½

Not for the faint of heart. I have to imagine this film is as close a portrayal of the story as is humanly possible. Fassbender is brilliant, and his dialogue with Cunningham is one of the best exchanges I've seen on film.

John Dies at the End

A very bizarre, very clever brand of gory sci-fi humor.

Gangster Squad

I can see why Gangster Squad has been generally panned by critics, but if you approach it knowing it's a piece of film pulp, it is a ton of fun.

Smashed
Smashed(2012)

A very real-feeling story with some great performances.

Interview with a Hitman

It's nothing too special, but stylish enough, and the main character has a lot of cool factor.

The Bourne Ultimatum

A solid final installment in the trilogy.

Mission: Impossible 2

Why are there motorcycles there in the first place?! Terrible movie. Well, not so much movie as series of ridiculous yet tired action sequences. The small amount of Ving Rhames comic relief is the only reason to watch.

Giorgio Moroder's Metropolis
½

It's certainly interesting, but Moroder's Metropolis is more notable as eye candy than a fresh take on the classic.

Arbitrage
Arbitrage(2012)
½

There are a lot of good elements here, but they're not woven together particularly well. Not to mention Laetitia Casta only survives for half an hour. You do have to admire the fact that the bad guy wins though.

Whores' Glory

Unblinking and fascinating.

The Awakening

The awakening is more British early 20th century period piece than anything else, and McNulty wasn't enough to elevate it, so the tiny bit of Rebecca Hall breast that we see is also totally inadequate to make the movie memorable.

Howl
Howl(2010)

Fascinatingly different. Howl does a great job of adapting a poem and the story of the poem for the big screen.

Jack Reacher
Jack Reacher(2012)

Jack Reacher is 100% Hollywood thriller, and it does it extremely well.

The Oranges
The Oranges(2012)

First off, I admire this movie for finally realizing the onscreen romance between Hugh Laurie and Leighton Meester that I've been yearning for since season 3 of House. That having been said, Mr. Laurie's talent goes completely unused in this uninspired, often painfully dull and formulaic pile of crap.

Silver Linings Playbook

Possibly tied or edging out Django Unchained for Best Picture. Silver Linings oozes with talent, all of whose characters are amazingly well-developed, all the while tugging firmly at heartstrings and confronting the elephant in the room of mental illness intelligently head-on.

A Life Less Ordinary
½

It's mostly a standard romantic comedy with all the usual cliches, but it's done with Danny Boyle flair, which makes it something better.

Lincoln
Lincoln(2012)
½

Very solid. Appropriately nominated for, but not winning, Best Picture.

The Dead Zone
½

I'm generally not a Stephen King fan, but The Dead Zone is a good movie. Having Christopher Walken in the lead certainly doesn't hurt.

Snatch
Snatch(2001)
½

Ritchie's gift for making absolutely every character - even the most despicable - likeable is second only to his ability to pack an absurd amount of fun into a couple of hours. It also doesn't hurt that there is an abundance of acting talent.

Django Unchained

Should have won Best Picture. The maturity of Tarantino's directing clearly shows in his ability to tackle extremely serious subject matter, yet put it into a stylish and ridiculously entertaining package.

Heat
Heat(1995)
½

Some of the action is a bit over-the-top, but Heat is a skilfully directed, engrossing story with Pacino and De Niro as icing.

Hitchcock
Hitchcock(2012)
½

Solidly entertaining, and Sir Anthony does a fantastic Hitchcock.

Donnie Darko
Donnie Darko(2001)
½

Absolutely captivating. Reading a complete explanation of the plot takes away a good deal of the magic, but the theatrical cut leaves exactly the right amount to the imagination.

Along Came a Spider
½

Not even Morgan Freeman can temper the banality.

Hesher
Hesher(2011)
½

Hesher is an extremely uneven film - one teeming with talented acting, amazing scenes, and fascinating themes. There's plenty of space in between those things, yet there is a reasonable intelligence in their interconnection.

The Passion of the Christ

It is pretty much just 2 hours of a Jew getting the s**t beat out of him. No wonder Mel Gibson wanted to make this movie.

Argo
Argo(2012)
½

Again, a really good film, but not necessarily deserving of Best Picture (though it is is the best of the nominees I've seen so far). One expects a certain amount of dramatic license - that is, after all, what makes true stories fit the big screen. But seriously, a runway chase? Argo is in large part about Hollywood, but that's too much Hollywood.

Brick
Brick(2006)

Brick is a dark and fascinating crime/revenge drama, to which the high school social setting adds an interesting layer.

The Fall
The Fall(2006)

Visually impressive if nothing else.

The Bourne Supremacy

Of equal caliber to the first installment. It's unfortunate that Franka dies in the first few minutes, but her death scene is one of the more beautiful out there.

Seven Psychopaths
½

Wonderfully convoluted, with both clever and violent humor, and some heart.

The Factory
The Factory(2011)
½

The bulk of the movie is positively dreadful. Absolutely everyone is an infuriating idiot, and Jennifer Carpenter's cop character isn't nearly foul-mouthed enough to make up for it. However, it gets points for the twist and not-so-happy ending, which makes the last 10 minutes bearable, if not downright watchable.

Zero Dark Thirty

Another Best Picture nominee that is really good, but not quite Oscar good. It's intense and interesting, and very well-done, though there's a nagging question of how much the truth is embellished at any given moment.

Red Dawn
Red Dawn(2012)

It's exactly as terrible as one would expect, but good for a few laughs.

The Last Airbender

Confusing, stupid, and generally terrible, but fantastic Rifftrax fodder.

Chronos
Chronos(1985)

Definitely more IMAX-y than Fricke's later work, which often makes it more bland, but also results it a few over-the-top visually intense scenes.

Skyfall
Skyfall(2012)

The opening sequence is reminiscent of the cringe-inducing Brosnan era, but once the opening credits hit, things really start looking up. True to the early films in an intelligent and tongue-in-cheek way, Skyfall is a very fun ride.

Beasts of the Southern Wild

It's definitely very good, but not Oscar good. Besides, that girl is sort of a...

Fail Safe
Fail Safe(2000)

Fail Safe is an apt marriage of two odd concepts - a remake of the original and a live television drama.

Samsara
Samsara(2012)

It's basically Baraka 2, and that's not a bad thing.

Paranormal Activity 4

At first I thought, "Paranormal Activity 4: All the same gags, but now with fart jokes!" However, as the move marched on, I began to hate it less. Children are inherently scary, and the one here is a shining example. Speaking of The Shining, I like the nod to Kubrick with the kid riding around the house on his tricycle thing. Anyway, the scary kid is so scary he wears socks with sandals, there are more kitchen mishaps as the wife should have been using the santoku to cut vegetables in the first place, the inconsistent inclusion of timestamps sometimes makes you wonder whether sudden movements are supposed to be scary or are just normal edits, teenagers are annoying, and the quick CGI demon face morph is incredibly passe at this point. Yes, the fourth captures some of the same tension and fright as the first, but enough already.

Chasing Sleep
½

Really weird, but good weird. I'm not sure what all the imagery means, but it's an interesting trip.

Grave Encounters 2
½

It's another found-footage sequel that makes direct reference to the original. It delivers some scares, but there's nothing original here.

By Dawn's Early Light

It definitely feels like a TV movie, but it's engaging and has some good performances. It's nice to see that James Earl Jones received a promotion after Dr. Strangelove.

The Possession

I haven't seen a box this scary since that photo of Paris Hilton... Just kidding. This one's not that scary.

The Gift
The Gift(2000)

If you sit through this movie you get to see Katie Holmes topless. But I suppose that's what fast forward is for.

Looper
Looper(2012)
½

At first I thought I would have a problem with the handling of time travel, namely present decisions affecting future people in real time, a la the picture fading in Back to the Future. However, the universe is so well-constructed that there aren't any paradoxes according to their concept of time. Also, Gordon-Levitt does an amazing young Bruce Willis. Oh, then they throw in some telekinesis. And a couple of love stories. And some drug addiction. Bottom line, Looper gathers up a bundle of disparate stuff and weaves it into a meticulously coherent and engaging package.

The Fog
The Fog(1979)
½

Standard 1970s-80s horror.

Compliance
Compliance(2012)

Dowd gives a really good performance, and Walker is really good at being attractive, but I think Law and Order: SVU did a more interesting adaptation of the story with their crazy Robin Williams. Criminally crazy Robin Williams that is, not regular crazy Robin Williams.

Existenz
Existenz(1999)

If you can get past the gratuitous innuendo, it's actually pretty good - a sort of cross between Inception and Dead Alive.

Killer Joe
Killer Joe(2012)
½

McConaughey gives a great performance as usual, and the film itself is mostly engaging, but it pushes far enough as to lose its edge.

Shame
Shame(2011)
½

For having so many exposed bodies that are easy on the eyes, Shame is not particularly easy to watch, but is quite riveting. Fassbender and Mulligan deliver fantastic performances.

Flight
Flight(2012)
½

The plot isn't necessarily anything special, but the performances are outstanding.

Rocky
Rocky(1976)

Rocky is a product of 1976 and Sylvester Stallone. It's not perfect, but it is good.

Chariots of the Gods

I can get on board with the hypothesis that if the Pacific islanders built model aircraft to try to lure the planes back, then ancient humans could have done the same for extraterrestrial visitors. There is no evidence to support this whatsoever, but Daniken and this documentary don't stop there. No, they show pictures of monuments and things, tell us they're space men or whatever, then cut away to more monuments, whereas in a real documentary about plausible theories they would have offered, you know, an explanation. Repeat ad nauseam.

Warrior
Warrior(2011)
½

For as stale as the plot is, Warrior really is a fantastic film. The performances are great (Nick Nolte in particular), and the fight sequences are progressively more nail-biting, until you eventually find yourself at the edge of your seat, aware of the fact that it's just a movie, but as emotionally invested as you would be if your son were quarterbacking the Super Bowl.

I Love You Phillip Morris

I'd previously discovered that Jim Carrey could act (Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind), but here we discover that he can also be funny. It's a cute and clever film, but seeing Carrey and McGregor as a couple takes some getting used to.

Spider-Man
Spider-Man(2002)
½

Standard superhero stuff.

50/50
50/50(2011)

A skillful blend of serious topics and serious laughter.

Fail-Safe
Fail-Safe(1964)

Tense, scary, and filled with great performances.

Punching the Clown
½

It's witty and funny, but the songs grow tiresome.

Winter's Bone
½

I think "raw" and "unflinching" are good descriptors here. Winter's Bone is a gripping journey through the backwoods, lead by a stunning performance from Jennifer Lawrence and supported by many others.

The Lives of Others
½

The Lives of Others is a fascinating glimpse into the East German social climate, but above all it's a great human story.

Blitz
Blitz(2011)

Pretty much exactly what you'd expect. There's some good Statham action, and the entire package ends up being pretty standard stuff. Mayor Carcetti from The Wire as the serial killer is a bit offputting.

Mission: Impossible Ghost Protocol
½

Once one manages to wrestle one's disbelief into suspension, this 2-hour BMW and Apple advertisement provides some seriously cool action sequences. Could have used a little bit of Nick Frost to compliment Pegg though.

Red Lights
Red Lights(2012)
½

The premise is good, and the actors are good, but the rest is predictable formulaic Hollywood. What makes me almost hate the movie though is how upset Sigourney Weaver gets that Robert De Niro cast doubt into her. If you are not willing to doubt your beliefs, you are not a scientist.

Electroma
Electroma(2006)

It's weird, and it's slow, but it's also very visually interesting.

Lars and the Real Girl
½

It's cute and heartwarming, but could stand to be funnier. Also, I like the Gos better when he's crushing skulls.

Lost In Translation

I'm not a huge fan of romances, but this one is really good. It's funny and serious in all the right places, and Murray and Johansson are excellent.

The Apparition

Yep, it's as bad as all the reviews say it is.

The Dark Knight Rises

There are a number of things that bother me about the plot, but it's still really cool to look at.

Ted
Ted(2012)

When it's funny, Ted is really funny - enough to make up for the time it spends not being funny.

Ali G Indahouse
½

It's not as good as the TV show, but Ali G deserves an appearance on the big screen.

The Tripper
The Tripper(2007)
½

It has some fantastic moments, but unfortunately there's a lot of other stuff in between.

I Am Legend
I Am Legend(2007)
½

The premise is interesting, and the vacant New York cityscape provides a very cool visual backdrop, but the zombie things would feel much more at home in the Lord of the Rings universe.

I, Robot
I, Robot(2004)

It has some serious logical issues, but I, Robot is still fun and cool to look at.

WarGames (War Games)

WarGames is good for what it is - a cheesy 1980s teen movie that carries a message about mutually assured destruction. It also apparently served as a test platform for some of the gags used in Ferris Bueller's Day Off.

Casino Jack
Casino Jack(2010)
½

I'm not familiar enough with the actual story to be able to discern between what's real and what's fictional, but as a film it's quite entertaining, and Kevin Spacey gives a solid performance as usual.

Cashback
Cashback(2007)

Kinda interesting, kinda amusing, and kinda sexy.

V/H/S
V/H/S(2012)
½

I'm very torn on this one. Within the first two minutes I doubted I'd be able to sit through the whole thing, and the bulk of the film is indeed shaky garbage. However, each of the segments ends up doing its own really interesting and artistic thing. Does that make up for having to endure the even-worse-than-usual found-footage crap along the way? I'm still not sure.

FDR: American Badass!
½

Truly special. The humor often dips to excessively crude levels, but there's plenty enough hilarity to compensate. The FDR character is a fantastic tribute to a great man, and Bostwick plays the role perfectly.

Premium Rush
Premium Rush(2012)
½

It's like The Fast and the Furious, but with fewer engines and half the wheels. It's fun, and the action sequences are good, but there's more exciting footage of real fixie riders on Youtube.

The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey
½

It seems more like a children's story than I guess I hoped a screen adaptation of a children's story would be. After a good long while it does provide the expected stunning visuals, and is a worthwhile cinematic experience. A nagging question however: Why, when Gandalf can do all sorts of crazy wizardy stuff, do they spend so much time using swords? And for that matter, why didn't he just hitch a ride with the giant parrots to begin with, and skip all the perilous bits?

The Fighter
The Fighter(2010)
½

I'm not a huge fan of sports movies, but this one is fantastic. The story seems pretty standard, but given the fact that it's true, it's pretty amazing. Add to that a cast that just oozes talent.

Revolver
Revolver(2005)

Uneven and incredibly confusing, Revolver requires so much mental effort to follow the story that it's impossible to enjoy. But damn, André 3000 has a silky voice.

Bronson
Bronson(2009)

An interesting and wide-ranging trip from appalling to absurdly humorous.

Fahrenheit 451
½

They did a reasonable job of getting the point across, but didn't necessarily do the book justice.

1984
1984(1984)

A commendable adaptation, particularly in its bleak atmosphere.

The Lincoln Lawyer

My favorite Ryan Phillippe-as-a-devious-rich-guy movie to date. What really holds it together though is the rest of the cast. Thoroughly tense and enjoyable.

Cruel Intentions

At its core it's a standard 1990s teen movie, but it's slightly more entertaining than most.

The Next Three Days

Despite the constant battle between the viewer's suspension of disbelief and the characters' dimwittedness, The Next Three Days remains a fun watch.

Dial M for Murder

A testimony to the fact that tension can be created on screen without action.

Stargate: Continuum

I'm not sure if it's actually a bad movie, or I just loathe it for making me want to punch Richard Dean Anderson in the face. Seriously, you got MacGyver back for this one, give him better lines! I mean, there was always some good-hearted corniness in the show, but here it's nauseating.

Radio Bikini
Radio Bikini(1987)
½

You can't go too far wrong when you have really great source material, but here the archival footage and radio broadcasts are woven together very cohesively into a fascinating film.

The Man of the Year (O Homem do Ano)
½

The story starts off very compelling, then becomes less interesting at time goes on. The direction remains skillful throughout.

Glengarry Glen Ross
½

It's entertaining and the performances are good, but the dialogue starts to turn the corner from amusing to tedious.

Total Recall
Total Recall(2012)

The plot isn't exactly airtight, and a lot of its elements are laughable, but the visuals are enough to make Total Recall very watchable.

The Terminator

Unlike more recent films, it's believable that the machines were unaware of the predestination paradox, and thereby the futility of their mission. Apart from that, it's easy to see why The Terminator was a new paradigm in action movies.

Safety Not Guaranteed

Pretty much your standard romantic comedy. It has enough funny moments, but is built on a faulty premise, as the predestination paradox would preclude them from changing the past.

Bad Santa
Bad Santa(2003)
½

I've got this nagging feeling that the other cuts are better than the unrated one. Still, the dark humor generally outweighs the sentimental drip.

Star Wars: Holiday Special

It's as bad as everyone says it is. I made it 30 minutes before having to add the Rifftrax, which succeeded in tempering the nightmarishly awkward surreality.

Trinity and Beyond (The Atomic Bomb Movie)

Fascinating footage, though the sound effects and fake voiceovers are annoying.

Dr. Strangelove Or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb
½

Peter Sellers is icing on the cake of brilliant writing, excellent direction, and a talented cast. The film makes its point strongly while remaining hilariously drenched in wit.

Meet the Feebles

One watches this and wonders, "Why on earth did anyone want to put up the capital for this guy to do Tolkien? Oh yeah, because he's a freakin' genius!" Darker and more vulgar than any description could possibly capture, Meet the Feebles is line-crossingly fantastic.

Bad Taste
Bad Taste(1989)
½

Twisted and highly amusing, often delightfully gross, but sometimes just gross. Jackson certainly has his own brand of creativity.

Heavenly Creatures

A perfect story to be told by Peter Jackson - serious, but with a strong element of fantasy. The beautiful composition is aided by excellent performances from the leads.

The Krays
The Krays(1990)

Sometimes interesting, sometimes boring, often melodramatic.

Klovn: The Movie (Klown)
½

Words... cannot... Gut-splittingly hilarious in so many very wrong ways, as could only be done in Scandinavia.

The Parking Lot Movie
½

Somewhat anthropologically and philosophically interesting.

Ong Bak 2
Ong Bak 2(2009)

The action sequences are fantastic, as in the first. However, they are packaged in much more "I don't care, just start kicking people again" this time around.

The Hills Have Eyes

The setting is cool and there are moments of fun gore, but those only serve as contrast to illustrate just how wretchedly horrible the rest of the movie is. The protagonists are so insufferably stupid I actually found myself yelling out loud at them. To make matters worse, they don't all die. My god do I hate this movie.

Miller's Crossing
½

An excellent Coen brothers film. The tone is generally serious so the punctuation by dark comedic moments makes them even more incredibly funny.

Wild Target
Wild Target(2010)

There are some moments, but overall Wild Target is a witless and haphazard waste of talent.

A Simple Plan

A Simple Plan certainly has its moments, and Billy Bob Thornton's performance is fantastic, but the characters (particularly Paxton's) are stupid enough that it becomes tiresome.

Chernobyl Diaries
½

The premise and setting are interesting, but the execution is poor. "Oh no! Someone died! Let's keep running toward the danger!" Repeat ad nauseam.

Bernie
Bernie(2012)
½

Bernie, and Jack Black, far exceed expectations. Very amusing.

This Film Is Not Yet Rated
½

A fascinating look at a subject to which I hadn't previously given much thought. It makes one appreciate independent filmmakers that much more.

The Bourne Identity

Full of exciting and what were at the time truly unique action sequences, The Bourne Identity is an excellent adaptation of the original story with a very talented cast.

Word Wars
Word Wars(2004)
½

Wow. You can't make stuff like this up.

O Brother, Where Art Thou?
½

Tons of goofy fun. It almost makes me want to read The Odyssey again. Almost.

Sexy Beast
Sexy Beast(2000)

It's a bit over-the-top in the yelling department, but excellent performances from a talented cast make Sexy Beast very worthwhile.

John Carter
John Carter(2012)
½

It's a Disney movie that does not diverge from the Disney formula. Very cool visually though.

The Whistleblower

Interesting subject, pretty standard movie.

The Amazing Spider-Man
½

The only thing amazing about this movie is how hot Emma Stone is. It's well-done, but it's just another superhero move, nothing special. Except for Stan Lee's cameo. Those are always special.

The Hoax
The Hoax(2007)

Pretty good, but takes too much dramatic liberty. A fascinating true story becomes just another Hollywood product.

The Big Lebowski
½

A beautifully crafted comedy that gets better with each subsequent viewing.

Michael Clayton

Excellent acting fits perfectly with an excellent script, tackling some serious issues in a skillful way. Swinton deserved her Oscar.

Blood Simple
Blood Simple(1984)
½

Similar in many ways to Fargo, but a bit rougher, it's clear to see that the Coen Brothers had a special gift from the beginning.

Animal Kingdom

Well-acted and unrelentingly gritty with a very satisfying end.

Kinsey
Kinsey(2004)
½

As a film it's okay. As a biography it's quite good.

Brake
Brake(2012)
½

Unsurprisingly (or perhaps surprisingly?) there are better trapped-in-a-box movies out there.

Jacob's Ladder

Utterly predictable, but a pretty nice job of pulling the audience into the character's mind.

Carne
Carne(1991)
½

This is exactly the sort of film that comes to mind when I think "French art house." It's not really engrossing, but certainly is interesting.

Alexandra's Project

Interesting concept but poor execution. The wife is simply tedious and elicits no sympathy.

Irréversible

More disturbing than... disturbing, but extremely well-done. Irreversible succeeds in making the audience feel the extreme violence onscreen, not just feel uncomfortable about it. Very nearly as good as Enter the Void.

A History of Violence

The Road was easier to watch. This is a nauseating movie of the week with tiny bits of slasher violence spliced in. Another fine example of great actors making terrible movies.

Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer
½

A little rough around the edges, but plenty disturbing enough to make up for it. Michael Rooker's excellent performance leaves little wonder that he went on to play important roles like Mr. Svenning.

Small Town Murder Songs
½

A great concept, but the execution somehow ends up unfulfilling.

Kiss Kiss, Bang Bang
½

An extremely enjoyable intricately woven story. There are moments that beg for re-watching as the wit is so rapid-fire that the viewer will almost assuredly miss lines due to their own fits of laughter. Val Kilmer's dry-humored gay private detective is arguably the highlight of the characters.

Leave
Leave(2011)

Heavy-handed but reasonably engaging. The ending only becomes apparent halfway through. Bryan Cranston plays an excellent gay Brit in a far too small role.

Emergo (Apartment 143)
½

A wannabe Paranormal Activity. It gets slightly less annoying as it progresses, then falls back again. On the bright side, there are some worthwhile scares, and it's only 80 minutes long.

There Will Be Blood
½

Absolutely gripping. Daniel Day-Lewis gives a magnificent performance.

Daft Punk & Leiji Matsumoto's Interstella 5555: The 5tory of the 5ecret 5tar 5ystem

Great eye candy on top of a fantastic soundtrack. Oh, right, there's actually a plot too.

Stargate: The Ark of Truth

Exactly what you'd expect: a direct-to-disc continuation of the television series for its already established fan base.

The People vs. George Lucas
½

Surprisingly intelligent and balanced. It's a geek overload, but there's enough interesting ideas to keep a merely casual Star Wars fan engaged.

Sinister
Sinister(2012)
½

It's a typical horror movie construction, but a good one if you have a well-developed suspension of disbelief. Could have done without the scary guy who didn't seem to do anything though. Children are scary enough.

Lucky Number Slevin

Contrived and convoluted perhaps, but the incredible coolness of Hartnett and Willis make it well worthwhile.

Bakjwi (Thirst)

Stylish, bloody, disturbing, and incredibly fascinating, Park Chan-Wook weaves together another amazing film.

Shallow Grave
½

Shallow Grave is less refined than Boyle's later work, and the characters often cross the line from amusing to annoying, but it's still an interesting exploration of human psychology and an entertaining film overall.

The Siege
The Siege(1998)

It's interesting to watch how they addressed some of the terrorism-related issues in a pre-post-9/11 world, but apart from that it's just a standard Hollywood action flick.

Clue
Clue(1985)
½

Amusing. Certainly not the worst movie based on a board game.

Taken
Taken(2009)
½

Taken is nothing more than Liam Neeson kicking a bunch of ass. He excels at it. (Unrated version)

The Tall Man
The Tall Man(2012)

There is a spark of possibility toward the middle, but it is quickly snuffed out. A terrible movie of the week, William B. Davis or no.

The Ugly
The Ugly(1997)

Stylistically surreal, generally bizarre, yet strangely compelling.

Bringing Out the Dead

Not without some merit, but mostly a crazy jumbled mess.

The Omen
The Omen(1976)

The kid doesn't really do anything apart from stare at things wide-eyed, and he's scary as hell. The Omen would be a lot less engaging if there weren't a Gregory Peck-caliber lead.

The Snowtown Murders
½

It's slow and challenging to watch, but tells the story well.

Lord Save Us From Your Followers

It's gimmicky, idealistic, and winds up pretty preachy in the end (albeit with a good message), but there are a lot of interesting and though-provoking interviews.

The Human Centipede (First Sequence)
½

It's... interesting. There's a serious amount of annoying and/or disgusting, but Dieter Laser does a phenomenal job with his character and is a lot of fun to watch. To add more value to the experience, follow the film with Daniel Tosh's "Spoiler Alert" thereof.

The Ides of March

A talented cast, a good script, and skillful direction combine to form an exciting and engaging film.

Good Neighbors

There are a number of boring moments, and quite a few annoying moments thanks to Jay Baruchel's insufferable character, but the fantastic moments mostly balance those out. Twisted and subtly darkly humorous, Good Neighbors is a uniquely entertaining film.

The Samaritan
½

Not spectacular, but reasonably entertaining. I was hoping that there would be more time devoted to the actual con, but there's still some solid badassedry from Jackson. The ending however is way too over-the-top schmalzy.

The Grey
The Grey(2012)

Two things prevented me from rating The Grey lower: 1. Liam Neeson. 2. Everyone dies. It's not a terrible watch if you're looking for popcorn excitement, but if a ridiculous yet humorless lack of realism bothers you at all, you should avoid this movie.

Kill List
Kill List(2012)
½

Most of the film is well-shot and genuinely interesting, then it makes a swift turn to just plain weird. The predictable twist ending is straight out of A Serbian Film.

The House of the Devil

The whole 1980s throwback thing is very well-done, and it works. Although the bulk of the movie is just a girl or two just doing ordinary things, with a slight bit of creepiness thrown in, the payoff makes it worthwhile.

Absentia
Absentia(2012)

I really appreciate what they were going for, and what they did with a tiny budget. Still, Absentia is incredibly slow, and struggles to hold one's attention.

Human Nature
Human Nature(2002)

It's no Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, but it is a very quirky, entertaining, and intriguing commentary on human motivations.

Friday the 13th
½

More important as a piece of filmmaking history than it is good as a film.

Double Jeopardy
½

Wait, wait, is something exciting going to happen?! Oh. Nope, still just your basic Lifetime movie that happens to have Tommy Lee Jones in it.

Jarhead
Jarhead(2005)
½

A rather typical story, but interesting enough, with enough good acting.

Very Bad Things

The overall plot is actually pretty good - ordinary guys doing a bunch of blow and killing a hooker, a bridezilla gets her just deserts, etc. But the movie is mostly a bunch of people yelling at each other, and it's annoying as hell.

Headhunters
Headhunters(2012)
½

I don't think I've ever seen so many genuinely surprising twists lined up in a row before. If that's not enough to impress, Headhunters also stylish, well-acted, and darkly humorous.

Cedar Rapids
Cedar Rapids(2011)
½

It's a typical cutesy feelgood comedy, but Cedar Rapids has a very talented cast and is chock-full of great moments.

Red Riding: 1980
½

A continuation of the first. Nothing less, nothing more.

Red Riding: 1974
½

Stylish and relatively interesting, but nothing particularly special.

Ticked-off Trannies With Knives

Not nearly enough comedy to offset the poor production quality.

The Last House on the Left
½

There are moments of particularly entertaining surrealism, but other than that it's just amateur garbage.

Drive
Drive(2011)
½

Drive is definitely something special. The style is great, Gosling is great, and the soundtrack is great. I really like the stark contrast between the quiet and the brutal violence. We discover nothing about the protagonist in the way of backstory, but the element of mystery makes him all the more fascinating.

The Cabin in the Woods
½

The premise is interesting, and there are a number of good bloody and/or funny moments, but the story degenerates into a boring epic battle to save earth from evil. The characters are also generally annoying, and the ending just stupid.

Antichrist
Antichrist(2009)

Yeah. I know better than to go into a Lars von Trier film expecting a comfortable experience, but this one really pushes the envelope. (If you are bothered by the sight of Willem Dafoe's penis in the opening minutes, rest assured, you haven't seen anything yet.) Still, Antichrist is unsurprisingly visually stunning, and a truly fascinating piece of art.

The Killer Inside Me
½

Fairly captivating but somehow doesn't quite gel.

Rampart
Rampart(2012)

Rampart has some great acting and some really interesting sequences, but the whole thing seems tired and disjointed.

Human Traffic
½

Another feelgood clubber film, and as such it's pretty good. There's certainly plenty of wit to go around.

Edmond
Edmond(2005)
½

William H. Macy is definitely the right person for this role, and he's great in it. Unfortunately the bulk of the movie is just inane ranting.

The Hunger Games

I haven't read the book, and my main interest in the film was to see what all the hype was about, and I'm glad I did. The story is captivating and purposeful, the visuals impressive, and the acting pretty amazing. I admit I may be biased however, as I'm generally a fan of all things post-apocalyptic and/or dystopian, and Jennifer Lawrence is, quite simply, smokin' hot.

The Toxic Avenger

Possibly the most flat-out bizarre movie I've ever seen. It's crappy, but makes no attempt to be anything else, and thus has its own charm. However you try to wrap your head around it, it's entertaining.

Marvel's The Avengers
½

Stunning action sequences, and though there's the requisite corniness, the writing is surprisingly intelligent.

The Boys & Girls Guide to Getting Down

Brilliant. I think a great number of people can relate to the hilarious and hauntingly spot-on depictions.

Captain America: The First Avenger

Better than Thor but not as good as Iron Man.

Traffic
Traffic(2000)

Lacking in subtlety, but full of engrossing stories and great performances. It's missing a key element of the source material, but this was necessary for a North American adaptation, and indeed it's a very good adaptation.

A Nightmare on Elm Street
½

For being a cheesy horror flick, A Nightmare on Elm Street is extremely well-done, and deserving of its status as a classic.

Donnie Brasco

The story is interesting, but Depp and Pacino make it a film worth watching.

Iron Man 2
Iron Man 2(2010)
½

Very much a sequel and a lead-in to The Avengers.

Down Terrace
Down Terrace(2010)
½

Down Terrace has an interesting plot, but is rather dull most of the time, punctuated by bits of dark humor and unexpected violence.

Primal Fear
Primal Fear(1996)
½

Predictable, but entertaining.

God Bless America

The social commentary is a bit heavy-handed, but a thoroughly funny and very satisfying film.

Best in Show
Best in Show(2000)

Very funny, like Spinal Tap for dogs.

Airplane 2 - The Sequel
½

There's definitely too much rehashed material from the first, but the second is still thoroughly laugh-filled. And there's Shatner.

Superfly
Superfly(1972)

Mostly just a vehicle for a very cool Curtis Mayfield soundtrack. Scratch that, exclusively a vehicle for the Curtis Mayfield soundtrack.

The Dictator
The Dictator(2012)

Like all of Cohen's work, The Dictator often crosses the lowbrow line, but is by and large witty and hilarious.

The Escapist
The Escapist(2008)
½

The Escapist is without a doubt a good movie, but I'm pretty sure I've seen all of the story elements before somewhere or other.

Traffik
Traffik(1989)
½

Ahead of its time for a 1980s miniseries. Well-written, engrossing plot, and visually beautiful.

Grave Encounters
½

Grave Encounters falls into the same "so annoying you want harm to befall the protagonists" trap as most found footage films, but manages to be incredibly creepy.

Mesrine: Public Enemy #1

Not quite as good as the first, but the story was already written, so not much could be done about that.

Mesrine: Killer Instinct (L'instinct de mort)
½

Tense, brutal, and mesmerizing, with an amazing performance from Vincent Cassel.

21 Jump Street

It crosses the border into crass several times, but it's really, really funny. Johnny Depp's cameo may be his best role ever.

Thor
Thor(2011)

Some pretty nice eye candy and decent fun.

Rounders
Rounders(1998)
½

Not epic, but entertaining.

GoodFellas
GoodFellas(1990)
½

Deserving of its classic status. De Niro is fantastic, and Pesci is as annoying as ever, but that works itself out nicely.

Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows

Likely a cinematic equal to the first, but its sequelality makes it slightly less gripping.

Alien3
Alien3(1992)

The plot and dialogue aren't the greatest, but the atmosphere and direction are pretty amazing. Certainly an improvement on the second.

The Bourne Legacy
½

It's fine. The originals had some truly unique and amazing action, the likes of which hadn't been seen before. This one does not.

Series 7: The Contenders
½

Series 7: The Contenders really hovers on the edge of something great. The characters fall just short of believable, and the reality-show-type production is spot-on.

Charlie and the Chocolate Factory
½

Quite impressive overall. I'm not a huge Burton fan, but his style seems well-suited to the source material here. There are a few minor issues I have, the largest of which is that the tunnel scene wasn't dark and scary enough.

Everything is Illuminated

Enough quirky charm that it almost balances out the schmalz.

Letters from Iwo Jima
½

A solid war movie. It's nice to see a human face on the story from the other side.

Awake
Awake(2007)
½

Interesting premise, but otherwise somewhere between mundane and stupid. I'm pretty sure he's Darth Vader at the end, but they don't make it very clear.

The Evil Dead
½

You can't get campier than Campbell. Groundbreaking, yes, but I appreciate it more than I enjoy it.

Dog Day Afternoon
½

Dog Day Afternoon explores some interesting and important issues. There are a lot of elements that are either taken a little too far or are a little too silly, making for a good, but not great film.

Noise
Noise(2007)

Relatively amusing.

Death Race 2000
½

It's great. I mean, it's terrible. But it's great.

The Prestige
The Prestige(2006)

Exceeded my expectations. An exciting, twisty story with a little bit of history and a little bit of sci-fi, glued together by an amazing cast. David Bowie as Nikola Tesla? It doesn't get much better than that.

Déjà Vu
Déjà Vu(2006)
½

Good things could have been done with the premise, but this movie is simply ridiculous.

1408
1408(2007)

There are some genuinely spine-tingling scares, but as you'd expect from Stephen King the story degenerates into heaven and hell and personal demons crap.

The Godfather, Part III
½

It's not bad, but two was sufficient.

London Boulevard

I caught glimpses of what appeared to be action, but I couldn't really tell you what happened. That could either be because the plot is confusing or just failed to hold my attention.

Aliens
Aliens(1986)
½

A typical 1980's shoot-em-up full of annoying one-dimensional characters spouting one-liners, redeemed only by the fact that they all die gruesome deaths. Sure, compared to similar movies of its day it's not bad, but Aliens absolutely pales in comparison to the original.

The Double
The Double(2011)

Wholly uninspired and cliched, but not entirely without entertainment value.

Thursday
Thursday(1998)

A mediocre example of the post-Pulp fiction crime film style which manages to be reasonably entertaining.

The Omega Man
½

Classic Heston ham with a bizarrely out-of-place muzak soundtrack.

The Godfather, Part II
½

Quite possibly as good as the original, but not the original. De Niro does a fantastic young Brando/Vito.

Mýrin (Jar City)
½

A worthwhile exotic thriller.

Battle Royale

The story is interesting and thought-provoking, and the film is on the whole well-done. The characters and their actions are usually annoying, but are actually quite realistic if you imagine how a group of high-schoolers would behave in such a situation. The action gets rather corny toward the end, but not enough so to ruin the experience.

Martha Marcy May Marlene

A compelling story and a brilliant performance from the little Olsen.

Iron Man
Iron Man(2008)

Too corny at times, but thoroughly enjoyable, and Robert Downy Jr. is great.

The Andromeda Strain
½

Much worse than I remember. The plot, particularly where science is concerned, is ludicrous, but then so was the book. The dialogue is poor and the acting wooden. The set design is pretty nice though.

Airplane!
Airplane!(1980)
½

Still the best slapstick ever made.

A Clockwork Orange

A masterful mix of stylish, intriguing, disturbing, provocative, and flat-out bizarre, centered around a marvelous performance by McDowell.

One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest
½

Story is fantastic, Jack Nicholson is fantastic.

Memento
Memento(2000)
½

Memento is plenty suspenseful and engaging, but what I like most is that the storyline is almost completely linear, but backward.

Krull
Krull(1983)
½

It's pretty bad, but in a thoroughly amusing and enjoyable way.

The Air I Breathe
½

Interesting for a while, but takes a complete nosedive toward the end. It is notable however that Brendan Fraser can actually act.

River's Edge
River's Edge(1987)

River's Edge is unquestionably odd, but in a good way. I'm not sure it does a great job of telling a story or making a point, but the misguided-when-not-ineffectual teens make for an interesting watch, and Dennis Hopper is more than aptly suited to his role.

The Edge
The Edge(1997)

There are some unintentionally funny moments, but it's mostly just bad, not as bad as Bad Company, but bad.

Serpico
Serpico(1973)

An excellent vehicle for Al Pacino and his beard.

Before the Devil Knows You're Dead
½

An intense blend of tension and drama that works really well. Philip Seymour Hoffman's performance is excellent.

Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels
½

Absolutely hilarious. A fantastic debut for Ritchie.

Unknown
Unknown(2011)
½

The Bourne Identity it ain't, though it wishes it were.

44 Inch Chest
½

The cast is great, the movie isn't.

The Godfather

In the words of Lois Griffin: "It's so good. It's like the perfect movie."

Deceiver
Deceiver(1998)
½

Would be really good if the plot and acting were reigned in a bit.

Street Thief
Street Thief(2006)

More promising than most mocumentaries, but with the same delivery. If one were to remove the blathering and the big idiotic turn that was supposed to make it exciting, what remained would be a pretty good movie.

All Good Things
½

A bland movie of the week that happens to have talented and expensive actors.

Brothers
Brothers(2009)

PTSD is a serious matter, but this story isn't much to write home about. It does however showcase the fact that Spider-Man is a good actor, especially when flying off the handle.

The Square
The Square(2010)
½

Thoroughly tense and enjoyable, though at times it seems as if I've seen this film somewhere before.

Prometheus
Prometheus(2012)

Engrossing and visually stunning, with excellent performances, Prometheus is truly a remarkable viewing experience. Still, it's not the end-all of films, with its veins of pure Hollywood and heavy-handed philosophical musings.

Senna
Senna(2011)
½

Excellent work telling a fascinating story.

Chronicle
Chronicle(2012)

I'm torn with this one. The found-footage thing is old-hat, and the inane teenage banter is nearly intolerable. Still, the effects and performances, and to a lesser extent the story, make this a remarkable and worthwhile film. For a style that's been done to death, I have to say they did the very best that could possibly be done with it.

The Big Brass Ring
½

William Hurt is good and the story is okay, but the film often feels as if it would be more at home on Lifetime.

Der Krieger und die Kaiserin (The Princess and the Warrior)

It's a very interesting and engaging film, but it feels as if it should be something more and doesn't quite get there. Perhaps it's the pace or the fact I can't really identify with the characters. It's certainly not the cinematography or acting, which are both exceptional.

The Midnight Meat Train

Vinnie Jones is awesome, but not enough to make up for the anticlimactic flesh-eating creatures.

Phase 7
Phase 7(2011)

The concept is decent, but the protagonist is incredibly unlikeable and the pace glacial.

Breach
Breach(2007)
½

Enjoyable but far from perfect, to get the tense moments requires wading through more cliche than a true story should have.

Three...Extremes 2

"Going Home" is pretty good, but on the whole this collection isn't as strong as the last.

Enter the Void (Soudain le vide)
½

Enter the Void is something special to be certain. The beautiful cinematic artistry pulls the viewer along a multifaceted and challenging psychological voyage. To call the film daring is a severe understatement.

Extract
Extract(2009)
½

Often annoying, not terribly funny.

16 Blocks
16 Blocks(2006)

Pretty much an endless string of cliches punctuated by Bruce Willis in a mustache and Mos Def doing a funny voice. Mos Def is in fact a really good actor in real life, but here he's astoundingly annoying.

Attack On Darfur

It seems as if Boll's heart was in the right place, but he's just a terrible filmmaker. What should be a portrait of real-world atrocities ends up just more Hollywood action nonsense. And seriously, Steadicams are not that expensive.

Primer
Primer(2004)

Primer is incredibly confusing if you give it any less than your full attention, and overall it's not spectacular, but it's very well-done for a very small budget.

One Hour Photo

Robin Williams does creepy very well, which saves this movie-of-the-week from being complete garbage.

Confidence
Confidence(2003)
½

The plot is predictably convoluted, but the cast makes for good Ocean's Eleven-style entertainment.

Raising Arizona

A bit too slapstick for my taste, but solidly entertaining, and with enough dark Coen humor.

Running Scared
½

It has some tense moments. That's about the only thing positive that can be said. It's mostly just a convoluted, confusing, cliched seizure-fest.

Cube 2 - Hypercube

Stunningly terrible. I hate myself for watching it.

Broken Vessels
½

The story may not be the most inspired, but it is engaging. The one thing that really bugs me though is the "original music" which is a series of blatant rip-offs of other, legitimately good music from the era.

Cube
Cube(1998)

Terrible. I'm a fan of movies that do crafty things with low budgets, but this is certainly not one of them. Still, for some inexplicable reason I'm tempted to watch the sequels.

Iron Sky
Iron Sky(2012)
½

Iron Sky is a bit rough around the edges, but the premise, political commentary, and visual design make it something pretty special.

Ong-Bak (Ong Bak: Muay Thai Warrior)
½

The plot is negligible, and the action scenes are mostly overdone, but they have a certain sort of really appealing charm about them. Perhaps it's because the naivete of the hero never presents itself as buffoonish, unlike the leads in some similar films.

25th Hour
25th Hour(2003)
½

An excellent film sprinkled with Spike Lee's inability to be subtle about social commentary. The rants would have entirely ruined a lesser film.

Dazed and Confused

It's not great, but it's easy to see why it's a classic.

The Messenger

The drama is a bit thick, but the story is compelling and the performances excellent.

Dogville
Dogville(2003)

The set and cinematography are fantastic. The story is rather drawn out, but the payoff at the end is well worth it.

28 Weeks Later...

Rubbish. One just spends the whole film angry at the characters' stupidity. Definitely a stark contrast to the first.

28 Days Later

Interesting social commentary fills a very good zombie movie, and the zombies are fast-moving.

Contraband
Contraband(2012)
½

Enjoyable, but uneven and convoluted.

RiP: A Remix Manifesto
½

Fairly interesting, fairly seizure-inducing, and fairly amateurish.

Night of the Comet
½

Stupid, but generally weighted toward amusingly stupid rather than just plain stupid.

THX 1138
THX 1138(1971)

I'm giving this four stars based on what I assume the movie would be like before Lucas went back and fucked it all up with idiotic-looking CGI. The story is standard sci-fi fare, but the film is artistically remarkable, or rather was. I think.

The Girl Who Kicked the Hornet's Nest

Not quite as good as the first two, but still a great film.

Babel
Babel(2006)
½

The stories are not so much interesting as captivating, and coupled with impressive cinematography make for an exceptional film.

Killer Elite
Killer Elite(2011)
½

Entertaining, but nothing special. The Statham/Owen combo is pretty cool. There's De Niro too.

The Devil Inside

There's been a great exorcism movie in existence for 40 years now, so if you want to make another in the genre you have to at least try.

The Darkest Hour

A terrible excuse to shoot a movie in Moscow.

Gosford Park
Gosford Park(2001)

I'm generally not a fan of the old-timey English manor setting, but Gosford Park sucked me in fairly quickly with its amusing story and all-star cast.

Things to Do in Denver...When You're Dead
½

A little disjointed, and fairly sentimental, but nonetheless enjoyable.

Metropolis
Metropolis(1927)

I am stunned at how amazing Metropolis is. The story is interesting in its historical context, but the film is a technical marvel. The set design, cinematography, special effects, and editing make for a mind-boggling visual experience.

Inside Man
Inside Man(2006)
½

Enjoyable, but a bit typical, and things wrap up a little too perfectly.

Burn After Reading
½

Great cast, great characters, and a great Coen brothers story.

Legacy: Black Ops
½

Idris Elba is a good actor. That's the entire takeaway here.

Quarantine 2: Terminal

They were on the red-eye, get it? Because the virus turns their eyes red. Seriously though, terrible. At least Debra Morgan wasn't around to make things even more annoying.

The Last Exorcism

It has its moments, but becomes a bit tedious, and the ending is terrible. It doesn't help that the found-footage mockumentary thing has been done to death, and several scenes in this film seem spliced directly from others.

My Name Is Bruce
½

Great idea, stupid execution.

Tucker and Dale vs. Evil

The mushy bits are pushed just a little too far, but the fantastic hilarity easily makes up for it.

Slacker
Slacker(1991)

A film about nothing in particular, Slacker is as interesting as it is strange.

Fracture
Fracture(2007)
½

Enjoyable overall, and it's hard to go wrong with Sir Anthony, but two things bothered me: The diabolical cleverness of Hopkins' character was a little too Hannibal Lecter-like. Far worse than that, the crucial piece of the mystery is blatantly obvious throughout the entire movie, yet nobody can figure it out, hint after hint.

Bubba Ho-Tep
Bubba Ho-Tep(2003)
½

Well-intentioned but slow, punctuated with a few fantastic moments.

Sleeping Beauty

Fascinating if not downright bizarre. It's possible my opinion of Sleeping Beauty would be lower if not for Emily Browning being so attractive and often naked.

The Thirteenth Floor

The premise is decent, but the plot is exceedingly convoluted and the dialogue pretty cheesy.

Haywire
Haywire(2012)

Solid entertainment. The action sequences are remarkable.

Lebanon (Levanon)
½

It's good, but the gunsight gimmick gets old quickly, detracting from the power and gravity of the film.

Misery
Misery(1990)

The story is decent, but Kathy Bates absolutely makes the movie.

Special
Special(2006)

Special has a very interesting premise, which is quite well-explored. It would truly be something special however, if it weren't so sappy and uneven.

High Tension (Switchblade Romance)
½

Slightly worse than run-of-the-mill. It has moments, but they float in a sea of boring.

X-Men: First Class

Plenty of preaching and general inanity, but enough cool effects and Fassbender to mostly make up for it. Bonus points for James Remar and Michael Ironside.

Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy

A solid Cold War thriller, in which Gary Oldman is fantastic.

Dawn of the Dead
½

I appreciate Dawn of the Dead more than I actually like it. It has fantastic elements, and it was truly revolutionary, but it's often just silly. Of course it's impossible not to make subconscious comparisons to more recent zombie films, on which Romero's earlier work had enormous influence.

The Human Centipede II (Full Sequence)

There are initial glimmers of possible artistic and amusement value, but it ends up being nothing more than extremely vile.

Winnebago Man

It's a mediocre production, but Jack Rebney is far more fascinating than one could possibly imagine.

Capote
Capote(2005)

Philip Seymour Hoffman's performance is amazing. Apart from that it's a good film, but not terribly riveting.

JCVD (Van Dammage)

Interesting, but much more drama than comedy or action. Van Damme's performance is impressive. I think I would find JCVD much more engaging if I spoke French.

Fargo
Fargo(1996)

Absolutely brilliant. Great performances and dark humor perfectly capture Midwest stereotypes. Marge becomes more admirable and Fargo gets better with every viewing.

127 Hours
127 Hours(2010)
½

Amazing cinematography and editing. Boyle does a staggeringly brilliant job of capturing Ralston's mental journey. Great stuff.

The Perfect Host

You have to give David Hyde Pierce credit for doing a fantastic job with what he had to work with, which was complete rubbish. Weak and incredibly disjointed, the glimmers of possibility in this movie go wholly unrealized.

A Serious Man

Not my favorite Coen brothers film, but certainly reflective of their talent.

Ocean's Thirteen

It's another sequel. Nothing special, but better than the previous one, and still entertaining.

Transsiberian
½

Ben Kingsley is awesome. Other than that, okay I guess, but with a pervasive movie of the week vibe.

Ocean's Twelve
½

The first half is just a desperate grasp at a sequel, but the end result is a fairly entertaining movie. The Bruce Willis scene significantly adds to the overall enjoyability.

Ocean's Eleven

There are plenty of criticisms that could be made, but they wouldn't change the fact that Ocean's Eleven is very cool and very entertaining.

Drive Angry
Drive Angry(2011)
½

Mostly terrible, but not without entertainment value. William Fichtner's character in particular is very amusing.

Dead Man
Dead Man(1995)

I'm at a bit of a loss as to how to describe Dead Man. I'll settle with "very good," and "out there."

The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo
½

Phenomenal - near perfect acting and direction. I'm reluctant to make comparisons to the Swedish version because the differences are generally neither for better or worse, just different. However, I was slightly disappointed by Martin's final scene.

The Baker
The Baker(2007)

It has Damian Lewis so it should be good, right? Nope. It does have its moments, but they are generally overshadowed by the sickening cutesiness.

JFK
JFK(1991)

Dripping in Stone's agenda, but an entertaining thriller.

Horrible Bosses
½

Crass and banal, but quite funny.

Death of a President

Much better than expected. It is melodramatic and preachy, but not annoyingly so, and it does raise some interesting points.

Melancholia
Melancholia(2011)

Incredible visually, and with fantastic direction. The story is good, but not extraordinary.

Exorcist II: The Heretic

Wow. I respect wanting to capitalize on a successful film, but I can't imagine a worse job of it. Not an even remotely scary moment is contained within the 2 tedious hours.

Lunopolis
Lunopolis(2009)

A perfect example of the downside of HD camera equipment being inexpensive. Amateur to the core. I've seen what can be done with low budgets, but here it's as if they didn't even try. I suppose if this were a high school freshman project it would get a high grade.

Rubber
Rubber(2011)

It doesn't quite deliver what the first several minutes promise, but its sheer bizarreness makes up for it.

Trust
Trust(2011)

Not necessarily extraordinary, but certainly very well-done, with moods ranging from uncomfortable to creepy.

Swingers
Swingers(1996)

Not laugh-out-loud funny, but amusing.

Vantage Point
½

It has its share of problems, but Vantage Point is an exciting watch overall.

Unstoppable
Unstoppable(2010)

Extremely inane, which would be perfectly acceptable if the action sequences were cool, which they aren't.

Hostel: Part III

A terrible B-movie with none of the entertainment value of its predecessors.

Eastern Promises
½

Eastern Promises is gripping, and Viggo Mortensen is fantastic (though we see a bit more of him than strictly necessary). However, there are several issues with the plot which are too serious to be overlooked.

Syriana
Syriana(2005)

Very captivating, but I'm not sure whether the story is actually compelling, or I was just straining to grasp its complexity.

In Time
In Time(2011)

The universe is shoddily constructed. They kill off the two best actors right away. The story doesn't have a point, at least not an apparent one. The dialogue is bland, punctuated by puns about time. Still, In Time is stylish, and entertaining enough in a mindless sort of way.

Losing Ground

The intention is in the right place, but the execution leaves something to be desired.

Hot Tub Time Machine

There are great moments, but they are too few to compensate for the stupidity.

The Departed
The Departed(2006)
½

Any issues I have with The Departed just seem like nitpicking. It's a really good movie.

The Virgin Suicides
½

Dark and darkly humorous with a fantastic soundtrack.

Go
Go(1999)

Good solid 1990s fun.

The Italian Job
½

Sometimes a bit too goofy for my taste, but a jolly bit of fun, and the chase sequence is classic.

The Descent 2
½

Unspeakably terrible, except for the number of tongue-in-cheek-over-the-top moments, which make it all worthwhile.

Lake Mungo
Lake Mungo(2009)

Three reasons I really like this movie: 1. It's worlds better than the prologue suggests it is. 2. It keeps you guessing. 3. Unlike other found footage/mocumentaries, it's EDITED - in a documentary fashion.

Night of the Living Dead
½

It's easy to see why Night of the Living Dead is regarded as a masterpiece. A fantastic production for its time, and parts are still genuinely scary to this day.

Staten Island (Little New York)
½

Very uneven, and boring out of the gate, but it steadily improves through the end. Far from perfect, but enjoyable.

Dear Mr. Gacy
½

Weird and creepy. The true story is pretty fascinating, and though it's quite apparent that significant dramatic (often melodramatic) license was taken, the resulting film is watchable.

Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call New Orleans

Not bad, but one is constantly reminded that Nicolas Cage isn't as good as Harvey Keitel.

The Disappearance of Alice Creed
½

The characters' stupidity is frequently aggravating, and the plot is more than a little contrived, but it's still a well-shot, enjoyable watch.

Kill the Irishman

Cleverly violent and full of charming performances.

Shadow Conspiracy

So bad it's almost good, but not quite.

Last Train Home
½

As the poster suggests, it is fascinating and beautifully shot, but a significant portion is also boring.

21
21(2008)
½

The subject matter is interesting, and Kevin Spacey is always good, but the plot is tiresome, and one can feel nothing but apathy toward the protagonist.

The Core
The Core(2003)

Ridiculously stupid, but pretty fun.

Star Trek Generations

A difficult movie to watch, even with the Rifftrax. A waste of two good actors and a waste of Shatner.

Wall Street
Wall Street(1987)
½

Wall Street may be lacking in depth, but damn is it incredibly captivating.

Air Force One

If you enter with low expectations, it's a bit of mindless fun. Very difficult to watch without the theme from Raiders of the Lost Ark going through your head though.

Rampage
Rampage(2009)

I'm left with this question: Why did I think it was a good idea to watch an Uwe Boll movie? Even if the dialogue hadn't been ad libbed by schizophrenics and the cameraman hadn't had Parkinson's, Rampage would still have no redeeming qualities.

7 Days (Les 7 jours du talion)
½

A little rough around the edges, but definitely on the right track, 7 Days is an interesting exploration of revenge and grief.

The Woman
The Woman(2011)
½

Extremely weird, sometimes in a good way. There are many fantastic moments with lots of various sorts of filler in between.

Nightwatch
Nightwatch(1998)

An egregious waste of talent.

Hotel Rwanda
Hotel Rwanda(2004)
½

A good job of telling a compelling story, but as a film not particularly standout.

The Horseman
The Horseman(2008)

Brutally violent and not comfortable to watch, but well worth watching.

The Ledge
The Ledge(2011)

Contrived, yes, but ultimately a pretty moving and thought-provoking mix of suspense, drama, and romance.

From The Sky Down
½

Extremely fascinating, but I think you need to be a serious U2 fan to really get into it.

Easy A
Easy A(2010)
½

I like Emma Stone, I like the nod to 1980s movies, and it has plenty of moments, but Easy A is steeped in mediocrity.

Three...Extremes (Saam gaang yi)

Each director brings something different to the table, and each story is artfully disturbing, making this a fantastic collection.

The Debt
The Debt(2011)
½

An intense, engaging spy thriller with fantastic acting.

100 Feet
100 Feet(2008)

At first it seems as if it'll at least be worth watching for a few scares, but the stupidity builds and builds until it's completely intolerable. Then it becomes so stupid that it couldn't possibly get any worse. Then it gets stupider.

Platoon
Platoon(1986)
½

Platoon is certainly very good, and filled with fantastic actors, but it's not quite as epic as it would like to be, and not the best of the Vietnam War films.

Alive
Alive(1993)
½

It's plenty drippy, and the realism leaves something to be desired, but pretty good. Certainly much better than I would have expected.

Hanna
Hanna(2011)

I like what they were going for, and Ronan and Bana's performances were solid, but overall unevenness and inconsistency prevents Hanna from achieving greatness.

Contagion
Contagion(2011)
½

I takes a bit of a nose dive at the end, but it still the best disease pandemic movie I've seen, and for the most part it's highly plausible - a rare trait in the genre. I was bothered by a couple things however, namely Demetri Martin not being funny and that thing on Laurence Fishburne's upper lip.

Los Cronocrímenes (Timecrimes)

The protagonist is annoying at first, but the thrilling and well-constructed convolution more than makes up for it.

Rollerball
Rollerball(1975)

The story isn't particularly compelling, but the 1970s vision of the future and the action sequences are fun.

Bad Lieutenant

Incredibly disturbing and captivating. I was never made to care about the fate of Keitel's character, but he's quite something to watch.

Bad Teacher
Bad Teacher(2011)

Formulaic and lowbrow, but entertaining, with a number of talented cast members. There are cringe-inducing and laugh-out-loud moments, often at the same time.

G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra

Terrible, which is not unexpected for an action movie based on a doll. Still, it could be worse. It could've been directed by Michael Bay.

The Dark Knight
½

Very definitely something special. The Dark Knight has plenty of flaws, but they are far overshadowed by magnificence. Ledger and his character are particular remarkable, but the film is full of great performances.

Creep
Creep(2005)
½

There are good moments, but they all seem to have come from different films. The bulk of Creep is mediocre and disjointed, but watching Franka running around ineptly for an hour and a half is truly and severely irksome.

Rise of the Planet of the Apes
½

Thoroughly enjoyable. There are oodles of places where the plot simply defies logic, even within the film's universe, and plenty of schmalz, but neither of these things are unbearable next to the excellent effects. One thing that is bothersome however: Tom Felton's character is not worthy of speaking Heston's iconic line. I mean, it had to be thrown in there somewhere, and he was the most fitting character to do so, but it still feels like blasphemy.

Cowboys & Aliens
½

I didn't have particularly high expectations, but it should be more fun than it is. Daniel Craig remains awesome.

[Rec] 2
[Rec] 2(2010)

Initially the any-excuse-to-have-a-camera-present premise is annoying, but [Rec] 2 grows on you. It often feels like a first-person shooter, but is still full of great scares punctuated by over-the-top hilarity.

Zenith
Zenith(2011)
½

Bland and pointless. It tries too hard to be cool, thereby ensuring its failure therein.

Dancer in the Dark
½

Incredibly depressing, but a compelling story with a stunning performance from Björk. The fantastic musical numbers are a highlight as well.

The Bleeding House

Daaaaark. It's not perfect, but the engaging creepiness makes The Bleeding House a worthwhile watch.

Buried
Buried(2010)

Intriguing concept, tense, thrilling, nicely shot and acted. However, Buried far exceeds my capacity for suspension of disbelief.

From Paris with Love
½

Not good, but Travolta's character kinda grows on you, and there are amusing moments.

Marathon Man
Marathon Man(1976)

Not bad, but I'm guessing it was much better 35 years ago. There are a number of plot points that don't make sense, and it's frequently over-dramatic, which is perhaps a product of its era.

Monsters
Monsters(2010)

Monsters teeters on the edge of greatness. The compelling story and excellent direction are pretty much ruined by the commentary on U.S. immigration policy and E.T.-type element.

Rain Fall
Rain Fall(2009)
½

The casting is great, and that's about the only positive thing to say about Rain Fall. Apart from the general lackluster, it really does not do the book justice, in story, characters, or mood. For as fantastic as the source material is, this movie is a bitter disappointment.

[Rec]
[Rec](2007)
½

Good. In stark contrast to the American remake. The cinematography will significantly increase your intracranial pressure however.

Put the Needle on the Record
½

Interesting and informative, but not particularly accessible to those who aren't fairly serious electronic music fans.

The Captains
The Captains(2011)
½

To enjoy this you really have to love Shatner. And you have to love that Shatner loves Shatner. This does for documentaries a bit what The Transformed Man did for cover albums.

Bridesmaids
Bridesmaids(2011)

It's a fairly tired old story which is somehow woven into a gut-wrenchingly hilarious laugh-until-you-choke-on-your-own-lungs-fest.

Quarantine
Quarantine(2008)

Not without its moments, but the bulk is so annoying and/or idiotic as to render it nearly unwatchable, which is particularly disappointing because the premise is rather interesting. I mean, the camerawork makes The Blair Witch Project look like Lawrence of Arabia. It has a happy ending though - everyone dies.

Brazil
Brazil(1985)
½

In essence a live-action Terry Gilliam animation of 1984. And absolutely brilliant.

Blade Runner
Blade Runner(1982)

I feel as if I should like Blade Runner more than I do. I understand its significance, and it really is a great film, but enough of it seems 1980s overdone that I'm not in love with it.

Food, Inc.
Food, Inc.(2009)

Full of interesting information, but so biased and preachy as to make it often difficult to stomach. Particularly distasteful is the playing up of a couple of sob stories which would have had simpler solutions than villainizing the agriculture and fast-food industries. A. Your kid wouldn't have died of E. coli if you'd cooked his burger well. B. If you're worried about your diabetes, don't order the goddamn soda.

Frailty
Frailty(2002)

Delightfully creepy-as-hell, but definitely better the first time around, when you don't know how it ends.

Spin (You Are Here)
½

It succeeds at entertaining, but fails miserably when trying to be serious.

Terribly Happy (Frygtelig lykkelig)

I've seen elements of this film before, but nothing quite like the whole. The ending is a bit predictable, but the dark journey is full of unforeseen turns.

Mulholland Drive

I like it a lot, but I don't get it.

The Guard
The Guard(2011)
½

Perhaps the most bipolar film I've ever seen - alternately side-splittingly hilarious and completely serious. Truly brilliant.

Empire Records

Substantially entertaining in a 1990s way.

The Green Mile
½

Pretty amazing - a typical Stephen King story formed into an exceptional film.

Crazy, Stupid, Love.
½

It falls into a lot of the typical romantic comedy pits, but is consistently funny.

The Other Woman
½

If you're looking for hot Ambrose-on-Portman action you'll be disappointed, but for a melodrama it's not too bad.

POM Wonderful Presents: The Greatest Movie Ever Sold

Very entertaining, and lacking the annoying agenda of Super Size Me.

The Uninvited

I spent the first half hour confused as to how this could be a remake of A Tale of Two Sisters as the U-verse guide said it was. After I realized it wasn't, I decided to watch the rest anyway. I wish I hadn't.

Casino Royale
½

Casino Royale is an enjoyable movie in itself, but the treatment of the Bond character and franchise is simply perfect. The book of the same name is the first of the series, and is mainly character development, with little action that would translate well to screen. The film keeps the key element - Bond, Ian Fleming's Bond, at the card table - and adds some Broccoli-esque yet tasteful high-action.

Poltergeist III

Poltergeist meets Ferris Bueller's Day Off. Truly terrible. And who decided to give the girl more lines? No wonder she died shortly after filming. Probably of embarrassment.

Mallrats
Mallrats(1995)
½

Pretty brilliant for its day, but doesn't stand the test of time particularly well. Still, this continues to be the movie that defines my perception of Ben Affleck.

Insidious
Insidious(2011)
½

Insidious could be described as either a modernized Poltergeist or a motion-sickness-free Paranormal Activity with real cameras and actual acting. For the most part it's quite good and very scary. For a while it almost seems as if it could be the scariest movie since The Exorcist, but then it's silly for a long while.

Poltergeist II: The Other Side

Slightly-worse-than-typically bad formulaic sequel. There's a few decent scary moments, but nothing like the first installment. Still, like a curious chump, I'll probably watch the third.

The Silence of the Lambs

It would probably be a great film anyway, but Hopkins takes it to the next level.

Poltergeist
Poltergeist(1982)

A little too Spielbergy for my tastes. There are some great, really scary moments, but the movie is saturated with family feel-good, with plenty of special effects merely for their own sake.

Autopsy
Autopsy(2009)
½

Autopsy makes you want to like it more than you actually do. Perhaps it's the low-budget TV feel or the presence of the T-1000. It's certainly not without its moments though.

An American Haunting

There are some genuinely spine-tingling bits with boring crap in between.

La Mort en direct (Death Watch) (Death in Full View)
½

It's not exactly bad, but the sci-fi didn't fit well into this drama.

Sherlock Holmes
½

Holmes plus Ritchie - how could that not be amazing?

Battle: Los Angeles

The makers of Battle: Los Angeles do not think highly of the moviegoing public. I will not analyze it in detail, as to do so would require profuse cursing. Suffice to say it's not as bad as Armageddon, but pretty close.

Star Trek: The Motion Picture
½

The script leaves something to be desired, but post-2001: A Space Odyssey, and in the wake of Star Wars, it's a pretty sharp production.

Limitless
Limitless(2011)

Not perfect, but a very fun little ride.

Natural Born Killers
½

Bizarre. Sometimes artfully bizarre, but often annoyingly so. I have a feeling this is a movie best experienced under the influence of drugs.

Insomnia
Insomnia(2002)

There's cop cliche, but not a ton. The performances are excellent, making for an engaging and suspenseful movie overall.

Batman Begins

It suffers from the plot restrictions of superhero movies, but it's really good. It definitely washes away the horrible taste of that Tim Burton nonsense.

The Exorcist
The Exorcist(1973)
½

Masterfully done. Quite likely still the scariest movie ever made.

Scanners
Scanners(1981)
½

Not the greatest overall, but worth watching for the iconic head explosion scene if nothing else.

Mission to Mars

Not quite as appalling as Armageddon, but still moronically terrible.

Carrie
Carrie(1976)
½

The story isn't bad, and the filmmaking is superb. One bothersome issue though: There is no way someone as attractive as Carrie would ever be unpopular.

Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan

It has its share of cheese, but it's solid.

The Blues Brothers

The best movie spun from Saturday Night Live. It's goofy, but skillfully so, and the musical guests and performances are just fantastic.

Magnolia
Magnolia(1999)

It promises more than it delivers, but Magnolia is still very good. The stories aren't nearly as interconnected as we're led to believe, but they are interesting.

Trick 'r Treat

Sometimes creepy, sometimes disgusting, often funny, but always demented. A highly entertaining collection of stories.

Apollo 13
Apollo 13(1995)

It definitely takes significant dramatic license, but Apollo 13 is very well-done. This comes however from the viewpoint of someone fascinated by the Apollo program.

Shaun of the Dead
½

On par with other Pegg/Frost movies, it's really funny a lot, but not all, of the time.

The Mechanic
The Mechanic(2011)
½

It's a pile of cliche, but Statham and the action sequences are quite good, making for an entertaining and enjoyable movie overall.

Mimic
Mimic(1997)

Nowadays it's easy to forget that Josh Brolin can be in terrible movies. This is a powerfully stupid reminder.

The Italian Job
½

Hokey, but entertaining. Good cast and great driving scenes.

Hot Fuzz
Hot Fuzz(2007)
½

It has its moments in the first half, but becomes more continuously funny later on.

Sling Blade
Sling Blade(1996)

The simplicity of the story and general lack of action make Sling Blade feel as if it should be boring, but it's absolutely engrossing. Thornton's performance is nothing short of phenomenal.

Star Trek
Star Trek(2009)
½

Amazing on many fronts. If you've never seen anything in the canon, it's still a solidly entertaining movie in and of itself. The casting is perfect for the young versions of the characters, who are in turn quite well written and acted. Stylistically the film is brilliant - everything looks super futuristic and cool, but believably several decades behind what we see in the original series. There are a multitude of references to other canon events, but all intelligently done.

Paul
Paul(2011)
½

There's plenty of lowbrow material, but more than enough genuinely witty humor to make up for it. The greater one's sci-fi nerdiness, the more one will enjoy this film.

The Sixth Sense

It's definitely far more drama than horror, but well-done.

The Constant Gardener
½

The Constant Gardener takes a good while to get going, and it's thrilling when it does, but it's heavy on sap and preaching.

Hulk
Hulk(2003)
½

It's okay. The cast is talented, and the effects are neat, but the story is less than compelling and the Hulk is cartoony. The edits seem cool at first, but quickly grow tiresome.

Star Wars: Episode IV - A New Hope
½

An important piece of film history.

Room 205 (Kollegiet)

A few amusing moments, but generally boring and stupid.

Pearl Harbor
Pearl Harbor(2001)

In deciding to watch Pearl Harbor, I thought: A. It can't be as bad as its reputation, and B. There have to at least be some good action sequences. I was wrong on both counts. Throw in a bunch of pulpy romance, a heap of melodrama, and a boatload of historical inaccuracy, and what you end up with is a steaming pile of crap. A pile that steams for 3 solid hours.

Full Metal Jacket

Brilliant, no matter how much time transpires or how many times I watch.

Children of Men

The story is pretty good (how much you like it will depend on how magical you think babies are), but what Children of Men excels at is pulling the viewer into the action. Though the cinematography can often be motion-sickness-inducing, it skilfully bends the barrier of the screen. The Owen/Caine combo doesn't hurt matters either.

Beavis and Butt-head Do America
½

You obviously have to be a Beavis and Butt-head fan to enjoy this movie. That being said, it's hilarious. I mean, with Robert Stack, how could it be bad?

The Bone Collector

A good movie could have been built around the fairly interesting crimes, but one wasn't.

Event Horizon

It's Sphere meets Hellraiser - in space.

Planet Terror (Grindhouse Presents: Robert Rodriguez's Planet Terror)

Planet Terror has a lot of great acting and great moments, but they don't really mesh. Yeah, that's kinda the point, but the gimmick grows old.

Red State
Red State(2011)

I don't love every bit of it, but it's got some great elements, not the lest of which is John Goodman.

Cleaner
Cleaner(2008)
½

There's a glimmer of promise in the beginning, but then it quickly turns bland, cliched, and stupid.

Super 8
Super 8(2011)
½

Corny, but entertaining. I assume it's basically a new E.T., but I've never seen E.T.

Hannibal Rising
½

I liked the book, and the movie follows is closely, so I'm biased as a result. Production-wise it's decent, but not spectacular.

The Butterfly Effect

A pleasant surprise. Actually very watchable, though the best acting comes from a poster of Brad Pitt and Morgan Freeman.

Gran Torino
Gran Torino(2009)

There's a significant amount of cliche, but Eastwood's character makes it worthwhile.

Art School Confidential
½

It certainly has its moments, but they don't come together, and the result is bland and dissatisfying.

A Very Harold & Kumar Christmas

It's the same Harold and Kumar - fantastic pants-wetting moments mixed with as-sophisticated-and-funny-as-Jeff-Duhnam moments. I particularly like what they did with some of the 3D scenes.

Ginger Snaps
Ginger Snaps(2001)
½

It's pretty good for what it is, and definitely not short on amusement, but the longer it runs, the more tedious it gets.

8 Mile
8 Mile(2002)
½

There's nothing original here, and I'm not much of an Eminem fan, but it's a solid movie. The soundtrack helps.

From Hell
From Hell(2001)
½

Nothing special, but entertaining enough.

Inglourious Basterds
½

A perfect blend of just about everything - violence, humor, Nazis, and Brad Pitt.

The Wrestler
The Wrestler(2008)
½

The Wrestler more than proves that Aronofsky can make a fantastic film without crazy edits or special effects. It doesn't hurt that Rourke's performance is stellar.

Sophie's Choice
½

Mostly tedious, though the flashback scenes are okay, and the scene in which she sends her daughter off to her death is powerful despite the melodrama. I have a hard time taking MacNichol and Kline seriously, not only because their characters are poor, but also because of some of their subsequent roles.

Faster
Faster(2010)
½

Faster can't decide whether it wants to be serious or shoot-'em-up. Still, with all its flaws, it's a decent movie. I like both Johnson's and Thornton's characters, and there are some great scenes.

The Number 23
½

Jim Carrey is a very good actor. That's the only thing this movie has going for it.

Super Size Me
½

Incredibly biased, but interesting and entertaining. I was alternately hungry and nauseous while watching. For best results, this movie should be accompanied by the "Fast Food" episode of Penn & Teller: Bullshit!

Attack the Block
½

I find this film highly amusing, primarily due to the Ali G-esque portrayal of British urban youth. Apart from that, it does have stereotypical horror and save-the-neighborhood elements, but is still unique in a lot of ways.

Scarface
Scarface(1983)

Make no mistake, Scarface is a really good movie, but it's not quite as good as its reputation. The story is great, and there are absolutely magnificent moments, but there's also a significant amount of melodrama, and some of the sequences are downright cheesy.

See This Movie

For some reason this movie doesn't feel as tedious as it should, and for that you have to give it credit. There's definitely enough amusement to make it worth watching.

Freeze Frame
Freeze Frame(2004)
½

There's a lot of potential here - the premise is interesting, and the atmosphere is perfect for what I suspect they were trying to do. However, the film ends up missing the mark, perhaps because of the unbelievable characters or just poor acting.

The Work of Director Michel Gondry

My first exposure to Michel Gondry was the brilliant video for Daft Punk's "Around the World," which is included here. The rest of the material is of equal caliber, and turned me into a fan. A big enough fan that I didn't lose respect for Gondry after watching The Green Hornet.

Harold & Kumar Escape from Guantanamo Bay
½

Not as good as the first, but still has plenty of great moments.

Blue Velvet
Blue Velvet(1986)

It's definitely interesting, with great thematic depth, but Blue Velvet leaves me with a certain sense of uncomfortable confusion. Then again, perhaps that's part of the point.

American Beauty
½

American Beauty pretty much runs the gamut from hilarious to dead serious, and does it all extremely well.

Midnight Express

Joey, have you ever been in a Turkish prison? Midnight Express suffers from melodrama in places, but is still a gripping film.

Harold & Kumar Go to White Castle

The characters are likeable, and there are a lot of great moments, but there are also plenty of idiotically unfunny moments.

Let Me In
Let Me In(2010)

The Swedish version is slightly better, but this is still a fantastic film.

Mystery Science Theater 3000: The Movie
½

It's not my favorite installment of MST3K, but the standard TV-to-movie style works well for the show.

Eraserhead
Eraserhead(1977)

I can't really say I enjoy Eraserhead as a film, but I do find it to be an intriguing piece of cinematic art.

Trollhunter
Trollhunter(2011)

Easily the best "amateur" mockumentary I've seen. It's a bit like the Blair Witch meets Cloverfield - but good. And Norwegian.

The Manchurian Candidate
½

They did a pretty good job of maintaining the essence of the original film in the update, while still changing the plot significantly enough to keep it more interesting than a straight remake would be.

Caché
Caché(2005)
½

It definitely builds a goodly amount of tension, but doesn't particularly climax.

Disneynature Oceans

There is some cool footage, but nothing terribly unique. The narration is just a bunch of breathy gushing, or so I assume it continues. I stopped listening after the first 5 minutes in favor of some ambient techno. I also assume the movie is preachy.

Leviathan
Leviathan(1989)

The horror version of The Abyss. Pretty standard 80s fare.

Freejack
Freejack(1992)

Worth watching for the weirdness of it all.

The Manchurian Candidate

After watching this film, I became terrified of violent hurricanes sweeping the Midwest. Seriously though, it's quite good for the cinema of its day.

El Pacto Holcroft
½

Mediocre 1980's cloak-and-dagger stuff. With the combination of Caine, Ludlum, and Frankenheimer, it should have been much more.

TRON
TRON(1982)

Aside from the plot and the acting, Tron is something pretty special. Simply dazzling visually - impressive even 30 years later.

Ghosts of Abu Ghraib

Fascinating. Tying the incidents at Abu Ghraib to the Milgram experiment puts the situation into context.

Run Lola Run
Run Lola Run(1999)

Lola rennt is one of those films from which you can't pull your eyes away. Great camerawork, amazing soundtrack, and it plays with chaos theory more interestingly than anything else I've seen. Having Franka around doesn't hurt either.

The Social Network
½

Writing, acting, directing, soundtrack - truly a great film. And I'm completely indifferent toward Facebook.

Join Us
Join Us(2007)

Quite possibly the scariest movie I've ever seen.

Outbreak
Outbreak(1995)

I personally love the subject matter, and the movie isn't terrible, but Outbreak is just too full of standard bland Hollywood plot devices and dialogue.

Lies & Alibis

It has its moments, but there's plenty of nonsense between them.

Catch Me If You Can

Interesting and entertaining.

The Blob
The Blob(1988)
½

At first it seems as if it's going to be a nice homage to the original, then it starts going downhill and never stops.

The Road
The Road(2009)
½

A great movie, and a fantastic performance by Mortensen, but man is it bleak.

Death Proof
Death Proof(2007)
½

If you can sit through the rest, there's 15 great minutes of film in there. I mean, I like the nod to past cinema, but this is in itself mostly boring.

Paranormal Activity 3
½

On par with the others. Never mind the plot, the simple fact is these films are worth watching for the scary bits, and the third installment delivers again.

Dead Alive
Dead Alive(1993)

Ludicrously over-the-top, generally to hilarious effect. The makeup effects are fantastic, though I wasn't fond of the parts that crossed the line from gory to just gross.

The Expendables

This movie should be fun, but it isn't. You can tell they blew the entire budget on the cast.

The Freshest Kids
½

Interesting and well-researched. I wish it had been edited for longer attention spans.

The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari
½

I really admire what this film is attempting to do, but it misses the mark. Still, it's an interesting watch.

The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari (Das Cabinet des Dr. Caligari)

I'm not well-versed in silent films, so I'll have to take the critics' word that this is a masterpiece. Still, I think it's great.

Some Folks Call It a Sling Blade

Powerful in its minimalism. Thornton's character became iconic for good reason.

Book of Shadows - Blair Witch 2

Terrible. I mean, you expect it to be bad, but it's much worse than that.

The Blair Witch Project

Yes, it's frequently annoying and motion sickness-inducing, but you have to admire it for what it is. They took absolutely nothing, and made it kinda creepy, creating the paradigm mockumentary in the process.

Dark City
Dark City(1998)

I didn't love everything about it, but it's a visually amazing, enjoyable film.

Enigma
Enigma(1983)

Pedestrian, but not the worst for its era.

The Girl Who Played with Fire (Flickan som lekte med elden)
½

As good as the first. Not as shocking, but there is more character development.

The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo
½

A thoroughly engrossing film. Definitely story-driven.

Captivity
Captivity(2007)

There were a couple decent moments, but it's stupid overall, and the chick doesn't even emerge disfigured, much less dead.

24: Redemption

It's 24 - neither the best nor worst thereof.

Fatherland
Fatherland(1994)

Fatherland is a good book, but this adaptation is not only completely lackluster, it butchers the story quite a bit. The fact that not a word of German is spoken is bothersome, and the adult dubbing over the little kid is downright creepy.

The Wonder of It All
½

I didn't like the fact that some of the Apollo astronauts seem to have gone a bit bonkers in their later years, but it is actually quite a fascinating documentary.

Harry Brown
Harry Brown(2010)

Vigilante justice and Michael Cane - like tea and biscuits. He wasn't quite as bad-ass here as I perhaps would have liked, but I think that actually added to the power of the film.

8MM
8MM(1999)

Disturbing? Yes. Gripping? Yes.

The Final Destination

This one was definitely focused on making 3D - not making a movie.

The Long Kiss Goodnight
½

Interesting premise, poor execution. The action scenes are way over-the-top, the dialogue is terrible, and there's every action movie cliche imaginable.

No Country for Old Men
½

Fantastic. An amazing cast and the Coen brothers doing what they do best.

Sympathy for Lady Vengeance

Initially, Lady Vengeance is uneven, but definitely holds one's attention. The last third or so is amazingly powerful and thought-provoking.

Bug
Bug(2006)
½

Very weird, tedious, and not particularly interesting.

The War of the Roses
½

Danny DeVito and 80s zaniness each tend to get old very quickly, but The War of the Roses stays consistently entertaining.

Let the Right One In
½

There are some scenes that I suppose one would call horrifying, but Let the Right One In is mostly captivating, touching, and really well-done. And I have pretty much zero interest in vampire movies.

The Thaw
The Thaw(2009)

Not only completely stupid, but completely stupid and preachy. There are a couple amusing moments, and Val Kilmer's role is small, but these are hardly redeeming points.

The Hanoi Hilton
½

Too poorly written and acted for such important subject matter.

Fifty Dead Men Walking

Some of the characters can be irksome at times, but an interesting and captivating film overall.

Flawless
Flawless(2008)

There's a decent amount of sap, but 1960s Britain and Michael Caine are generally a winning combination.

The Thing
The Thing(1982)
½

Really pretty silly, but the effects are quite something.

True Grit
True Grit(2010)
½

I'm not a big fan of westerns, but this one is good, despite how annoying the little girl is.

Memory
Memory(2006)

I can't remember my intelligence ever being insulted by a movie to quite this extent. Given the premise, I was expecting something at least slightly akin to Altered States, but instead I got a phoned-in TV movie which worsened with each passing minute.

Exam
Exam(2008)
½

Somewhat interesting premise, but as time goes on it becomes increasingly uneven, predictable, stupid, and annoying.

Blood Diamond
½

It's not terribly well-written, but Blood Diamond immerses the viewer in a fascinating world.

Jason X
Jason X(2002)

I don't know what's more remarkable - that this movie was made, or that I sat through it. I wish I had known about Jason X when it was in theaters so I could offer aid to those who had seen it by bashing them in the head with a baseball bat as they exited, thereby removing any memory of this atrocity for the good of mankind.

Red
Red(2010)
½

Largely due to its cast, Red is a whole lot of fun.

Saw 3D
Saw 3D(2010)

Definitely the weakest Saw. May be better in 3D, I saw it in 2D.

Saw VI
Saw VI(2009)

The main trap-gauntlet in this one may be my favorite of the series.

Saw V
Saw V(2008)

Even though it had been only a few weeks since I watched the previous Saw installment, I had mostly forgotten the details of the plot arc by the time I saw this one. I appreciate the fact that all the films are tied together, but let's face it, nobody cares at this point. I can't say the previous films are actually better, but this one seems tired.

Conan O'Brien Can't Stop
½

A typical behind-the-scenes documentary, but fairly interesting.

Sympathy for Mr. Vengeance

Extremely captivating, slightly uneven.

Léon: The Professional

It's interesting and unique, but the elements somehow don't quite gel.

Oldboy
Oldboy(2005)
½

Interesting story, great cinematography, and doesn't let your mind get comfortable - the best non-English-language film I've seen.

A Tale of Two Sisters

Very well-done, but didn't quite hold my attention.

2010
2010(1984)
½

As an 80s sci-fi movie it's really not too bad, but as a sequel to an amazing piece of cinema, it leaves much to be desired.

Star Trek - Nemesis

A long, overproduced episode of The Next Generation.

Snakes on a Plane

Little known fact: all snakes wear blurry night-vision goggles. If I'm honest, this movie is substantially more amusing than I ever would have suspected. I laughed out loud several times.

In the Mouth of Madness
½

Not the greatest-written film ever - the main premise seemed like something out of a children's book, but In the Mouth of Madness scores very highly on sheer bizarreness.

Ronin
Ronin(1998)

Interesting but not overcomplicated plot, solid cast, and the action sequences are intense but not too over-the-top.

The Brothers Bloom

The Brothers Bloom is one of those all-too-common seemingly endless strings of plot twists, but as far as romantic comedies go, it's not bad.

Ransom
Ransom(1996)

Rife with plot holes and Hollywood fatuousness, but otherwise pretty good. With the exception of Mel Gibson, Ransom also boasts an excellent cast.

Quantum of Solace

True to both Fleming's character and Broccoli's films, Quantum of Solace cements the fact that Daniel Craig is the best Bond, and his are the best Bond films.

2001: A Space Odyssey

A cinematic masterpiece to be sure, but the floating fetus still weirds me out.

Red Corner
Red Corner(1997)

Mostly entertaining enough, but gets more melodramatic and more dumb as time goes on.

The Project
The Project(2002)
½

An interesting idea with its heart in the right place, but the style is inappropriate for the gravity of the subject matter. The Project ultimately comes across looking stupid.

Moog
Moog(2004)
½

Fascinating with a great soundtrack. Of course, I'm quite interested in the subject matter.

Ringu (Ring)
Ringu (Ring)(1998)
½

Very different from The Ring - psychologically creepy rather than visually, and a better film for it.

Virus
Virus(1999)

It's unoriginally predictably bad, but not totally horrible to watch. There are a great many issues with the film, but what bugged me the most is Donald Sutherland speaking British English with an American accent.

Moontrap
Moontrap(1989)

I ordinarily reserve the half-star rating for movies I actively hate, but I don't actively hate this one, it's just that bad - to the point it's almost not funny. The absurdity of the plot and cheesy effects would be much more enjoyable were it not for the hideous dialogue. The actors seem to feel the need to constantly talk when there is nothing to say. Seriously, shut your goddamn face for a second. To be absolutely fair though, I did laugh out loud toward the end.

The Hitcher
The Hitcher(1986)

Pretty bizarre, but dark and somehow enthralling.

Proximity
Proximity(2001)

Reasonably entertaining.

Apollo 18
Apollo 18(2011)
½

It's space Paranormal Activity. While a great idea, the execution is quite poor.

The Green Hornet

There are cool cars and some cool editing. Kato is likable, but not likable enough to compensate for Seth Rogen. Gondry, what have you done?

The Woodsman
The Woodsman(2004)
½

Not enjoyable, nor even comfortable to watch, but a great film. It's really creepy, really powerful, and really thought-provoking.

Zombieland
Zombieland(2009)

Fantastically hilarious, and the first time Bill Murray has been funny in 20 years.

The Machinist

An interesting ride, and really quite a good film, but I had a nagging feeling that this had been done before. Bale does an excellent job, and one cannot possibly imagine how creepy he looks emaciated until one sees with their own eyes.

Logorama
Logorama(2010)

Utterly fascinating, with some hilarious moments.

The Game
The Game(1997)

A fantastically convoluted thrill ride. Knowing the ending significantly detracts from the experience though, so it's really only good for one viewing.

Mad Max 2: The Road Warrior
½

It's an enjoyable film to be sure, but its potential greatness is offset by downright goofiness. If one were to remove the Disney and Benny Hill, The Road Warrior would be magnificent.

Mad Max
Mad Max(1979)
½

Better than I expected.

The Flock
The Flock(2008)

Not horrible, but not exactly riveting either.

Saw IV
Saw IV(2007)
½

I'm glad the Saw films use flashbacks, because even though I've seen the first three in the last few months, the storyline isn't very memorable. I liked this one marginally less than the others, though I can't put my finger on exactly why.

Hellraiser
Hellraiser(1987)
½

It's not the end-all of horror movies, but Hellraiser is well-done for its day.

The Informant!
½

The protagonist becomes slightly tiring, but quite an amusing film.

Pacific Heights
½

Perfectly watchable but nothing special.

Trespass
Trespass(1992)
½

Just an action movie, but intense and pretty entertaining if you can overlook all the action movie cliches.

The Fifth Element

Pretty fun, and visually interesting in a Terry Gilliam sort of way. Chris Tucker however is so unspeakably irritating that I was tempted to stop watching every time he was on screen.

Nothing But the Truth

Pretty Lifetimey in a lot of places, and you can smell the big twist a mile away, but really good overall.

Following
Following(1999)

Creepily captivating, with a storyline that demands active attention.

This Is Spinal Tap

Maintains a perfect level of absurdity.

A Nightmare on Elm Street

Twelve years old? You'll love it! Otherwise, you can use it to cure your insomnia.

Superbad
Superbad(2007)

It has its moments, but they are too few.

Sex, Lies, and Videotape

This sort of thing is not really my cup of tea, but I found it rather captivating at times.

Final Destination 3

Same formula, different death, obviously. I did like that they fit Love Rollercoaster into the soundtrack, but was annoyed by the guy talking about pitchers, when in fact a camera captures pictures.

Kick-Ass
Kick-Ass(2010)
½

Thoroughly amusing.

Maria Full of Grace

Captivating, but never over-dramatic.

The Unborn
The Unborn(2009)

There are some scares, but they are on the whole lame and stolen from The Exorcist. Even Vince Masuka, Harry Morgan, and Stringer Bell could not save this movie.

The Tournament

One thing bugs me above all else: Why, if you could remove your tracker and still remain in the game, did no one else remove theirs, especially after they found out it would kill them? Other than a few cool action sequences (which are negated by the sniveling little rat that is Robert Carlyle's character) a terrible movie.

Final Destination 2

It's not much of a movie, but it is another enjoyable collection of gruesome Rube Goldbergian death scenes.

Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil

Wouldn't be bad, but really long, and the drag queen is like nails on a chalkboard.

Orphan
Orphan(2009)
½

Dull, then promising, then ordinary. Nonetheless, it's enjoyable for what it is.

Surveillance
Surveillance(2009)
½

Not terrible, but definitely not good enough to have Bill Pullman in it.

The Jackal
The Jackal(1997)

I didn't have great expectations to be sure, but as Bruce Willis started work on his assassination it seemed as if this were going to be a reasonably entertaining film. However, it just got stupider and stupider until I wished the entire cast were blown to smithereens by a 20mm cannon.

The Man Who Wasn't There

Very noir. Tres noir? Whatever, it's moodily gravitational, and possibly Billy Bob Thornton's best role.

Dead Snow (Død snø)

A standard remote cabin horror story, but with unique humor and gore assembled perfectly.

Bottle Shock
Bottle Shock(2008)
½

A decent, if formulaic, feel-good flick. I don't think I would have liked it as much if I didn't appreciate wine however.

In the Loop
In the Loop(2009)

Quick non-stop hilarious brilliance. It's as if the the UK and US versions of The Office collided with The West Wing. Capaldi's character in particular is a gushing fountain of raw wit.

City of Industry

Harvey Keitel + diamond heist - Tarantino = bo-ring! And dumb.

Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps
½

There are bundles of little things I didn't like, especially compared to the original, but overall a solidly engaging and entertaining film.

Get Shorty
Get Shorty(1995)
½

It took me a while to warm up to it, and there are a couple characters I really didn't like, but it turned out to be pretty good.

The Maiden Heist

Three great actors definitely have their moments in this film, but the overdone cutesiness really becomes grating after a while. There is also far too much William H. Macy butt.

American Psycho

There is just something beautifully demented and captivating about this film.

Machete
Machete(2010)

Machete strikes a near-perfect chord of silly bloody and actual movie with a plot. By the end it grows slightly tiresome, but still a fantastic watch.

Playing God
Playing God(1997)
½

Promising gives way to boring gives way to stupid.

War of the Worlds

Overall a terrible movie. There are a lot of great effects, but you have to sift through Cruise's ham and two children so annoying you end up constantly wishing they would be the next humans to suffer a horrible end. Humanity as a whole seems to have a very Victorian reaction to the whole invasion, the level of panic nowhere near what one would actually expect. And then there is the face-to-face encounter with the aliens, which seems straight out of a Pixar film.

Layer Cake
Layer Cake(2005)

Not my absolute favorite British crime film, but pretty brilliant. Daniel Craig's character is very human, and Colm Meany has come a long way since the transporter room.

Triangle
Triangle(2009)
½

It takes some time, but Triangle eventually sucks you in. There's a glaring fault in the storyline, but nonetheless it's a thrilling watch.

Mars Attacks!

There are some truly hilarious moments, some amusing ones, and a whole lot of yawns.

Chaos
Chaos(2005)

Formulaic, clichéd, and insulting to the viewer's intelligence. As long as Jason Statham is around being badass, this can be overlooked, but he's only in half the movie.

From Dusk Till Dawn
½

There are great bits in this film, coarsely mixed together with some mediocre ones. Overall though, a very entertaining watch.

Exorcist: The Beginning

There are a few moments, but in between those moments is incredibly fetid rubbish. The use of CGI and green screen sometimes make you wonder if this is a Pixar film. Does not deserve to have "Exorcist" in the title.

Saw III
Saw III(2006)

More of the same, which is not a bad thing.

To Live and Die in L.A.
½

This film has a lot of merits, but the corniness and cliché are so intense as to significantly detract from them.

Dead Again
Dead Again(1991)

Pretty good, but feels a little made-for-TV.

Coffee and Cigarettes
½

Boring and pointless, occasionally punctuated with absurdity.

Return to Oz
Return to Oz(1985)

A typical '80s children's movie that is incidentally set in Oz. Moderately worth watching due to its sheer bizarreness.

Night on Earth

A lot more intriguing than it seems it should be.

Sunshine
Sunshine(2007)
½

Visually stunning and generally enthralling, Sunshine is on the edge of something exceptional, but doesn't quite reach it.

How to Kill Your Neighbor's Dog
½

Hilarious, extremely clever, Kenneth Branagh is awesome, and the film's got heart.

The Signal
The Signal(2008)

Incredibly inconsistent, often annoying, but it has some fantastic moments.

Jackie Brown
Jackie Brown(1997)

Wonderfully acted Tarantino characters and his best soundtrack yet.

Cast Away
Cast Away(2000)

A captivating film from the moment he washes ashore to his rescue.

Defence of the Realm (Defense of the Realm)

Pretty slow-moving, but the payoff is worth it. I imagine this film would be more captivating in 1980s Britain.

Empire
Empire(2002)

The story is ho-hum and it's hard to relate to the stupidity of Leguizamo's character. I do like how abruptly people get shot though.

Hannibal
Hannibal(2001)

I think Nancy Donovan did a fine job replacing the chick from Contact, but who cares about other actors when Anthony Hopkins is playing Hannibal Lecter? I wasn't entirely pleased with the book's ending, but the one they replaced it with here isn't anything to write home about either.

Chinatown
Chinatown(1974)

You can't help but love Nicholson's character.

Red Dragon
Red Dragon(2002)
½

I stated previously that Manhunter is better than Red Dragon. Upon further review I'm not sure this is the case. They are two entirely different films, both very worthwhile.

Armageddon
Armageddon(1998)

Complete shit. I have a laundry list of complaints about this film, but I'll keep it short. It attempts to be an action-sci-fi-comedy-drama, and fails universally. The plot is beyond profoundly ludicrous. A sad waste of a number of talented actors (no, not Ben Affleck).

The Vanishing
½

A Lifetime movie of the week that somehow has 2 good actors in the cast.

Basic Instinct
½

It's very sexy time, yes. Really though, remove the gratuitous sex and the story would still be exciting.

Black Sunday
Black Sunday(1977)
½

Enjoyable now, must have been pretty remarkable in its day.

Deep Impact
Deep Impact(1998)
½

I love disaster movies, and this one is reasonably entertaining. I can mostly deal with the sap, but Jesus H. Tapdancing Christ is the science ridiculously bad. Also, president Freeman is the only remotely likeable character.

Titanic
Titanic(1997)

Cameron: nice effort on the effects. Leo: don't worry, you'll actually be in good movies someday.

The Science of Sleep
½

Gondry's visuals, not the protagonist, are definitely the centerpiece of this film.

Severance
Severance(2006)
½

Not spectacular, but the balance between gore and British-edged humor is near perfect.

Johnny Mnemonic

I started off thinking it wasn't as bad as I expected, but then it got worse, then it got much worse. Still, you can't go totally wrong when you have Henry Rollins and Ice-T. Nice soundtrack as well.

Murder in the First
½

Murder in the First is too melodramatic to have the impact it should for the story being told. It's also very difficult to be sympathetic toward Bacon's character because he's incredibly annoying.

Hostel Part II

More of the same. I like that they caught up with the survivor from the first movie, but there were a lot of little things I didn't understand, like why Iceland was in the middle of Slovakia.

Hostel
Hostel(2006)

I like the premise, the gore is good, and it's fantastic to watch the unlikeable characters suffer, but you have to sit through a lot of annoying crap before you get there.

Saw (short film)
½

It's easy to see how this led to a successful franchise.

Saw II
Saw II(2005)

Not quite as good as the first, but enjoyable.

Passenger 57
Passenger 57(1992)
½

Stupid, but not unexpectedly so.

Sneakers
Sneakers(1992)
½

Sneakers has no shortage of corniness, but it's entertaining.

The Limits of Control

The cinematography is nice. Beyond that, completely pointless. Bill Murray appears near the end and is as annoying as ever, leaving a bad taste.

Equilibrium
Equilibrium(2002)

Visually pretty cool, but that's about it. There are many, many things that don't make sense about this film, but the worst is the level of emotion exhibited by the supposedly emotionless characters.

Midnight Run
Midnight Run(1988)

Pure '80s silliness, but not bad.

Vanilla Sky
Vanilla Sky(2001)

Bad, but not that bad. Cruise's fantastic hair makes his character and acting more tolerable.

Ghost Dog - The Way of the Samurai

Forest Whitaker's character is interesting, there's a nice balance between violence and humor, and the soundtrack is great.

Fast & Furious

Terrible. Obviously the plot is as idiotic as one would expect, but even the driving scenes are easily upstaged by modern video games.

Stargate
Stargate(1994)
½

Stargate could have been great, but they threw in a little too much nonsense and Disney. Okay, a lot too much Disney. But hey, at least it paved the way for another successful television series with Richard Dean Anderson.

Shutter Island
½

Another film in which the major twist was apparent almost immediately. Still, a thrilling and enjoyable watch.

Casino
Casino(1995)

For as long as it is, I was never bored. Good story and well-acted.

Blessed
Blessed(2004)

In the beginning there's a promising creepiness, but then the whole thing just turns stupid.

Ninja Assassin

The story isn't so fresh, and the acting leaves much to be desired, but the good ninja is super cool, and the fight scenes are a lot of fun.

Zodiac
Zodiac(2007)

Definitely not action-packed, but very enthralling, with well-acted, interesting characters.

Planet of the Apes
½

I liked it, and that surprises me. There are of course the iconic lines, overdone like only Heston could, but the commentary is good, and the action not quite as cheesy as I expected.

Final Destination

I liked the premise, and at first the film showed real promise, but failed to deliver. The best adjective I can use is scatterbrained - from scene to scene Final Destination doesn't know whether it's supposed to be funny or not, and the plot devices are inconsistent as well. That having been said, I still find myself inclined to watch at least one of the sequels.

The Alphabet Killer

Pretty decent for a movie of the week, but had no business being in theaters.

Starship Troopers 3: Marauder

I cannot believe I watched this after seeing Starship Troopers 2, but I'm glad I did. Mind you, it's not great by any means, but quite watchable. The effects are rubbish, but I like that they introduced a couple new elements from the book, particularly the powered armor.

Stone
Stone(2010)

It seems as if this movie is supposed to be all deep and everything, but it's mostly just gibberish.

The Day After Tomorrow

Do not watch this movie if you know anything about science.

The Tourist
The Tourist(2010)

I don't know whether it was the fact that I predicted the twist ending in the first 5 minutes, the outrageously idiotic plot, or the worst green screen effects I've seen in a decade, but I hated this movie.

The Town
The Town(2010)

The Town tries to be more than it is, but what it is is a very well-done crime film.

The Kingdom
The Kingdom(2007)
½

Entertaining, plot notwithstanding.

Candyman: Farewell to the Flesh
½

Pretty much the same as the first, but lacking a certain charm the original had.

Buffalo Soldiers

Pretty amusing, great soundtrack, but feels a little too Police Academy.

The American
The American(2010)

Not bad, just slow - pretty much as slow as a film can be and still hold my attention. Clooney's character is cool, so the 85% of the film spent watching him walk, drive, or sit isn't as boring as it should be.

Source Code
Source Code(2011)

An okay film, but it often seemed as if it were a loosely-pasted collage of elements from other films and movie cliches.

Identity
Identity(2003)
½

Fairly predictable and cliched, but entertaining.

Sputnik Fever (Sputnik Mania)
½

Interesting subject matter and nice archive footage, but nothing really groundbreaking.

Tokyo!
Tokyo!(2008)

Interesting but not astounding. The first and third segments are good, but the second is just weird.

Runaway Jury
Runaway Jury(2003)
½

A good thrill, yes, but also part sappy and part ridiculous.

Eternal Sunshine Of The Spotless Mind

It's amazing enough to find out that Jim Carrey can act, not as a buffoon, but as an actor. However, this film is remarkable far beyond that. Gondry's direction is the perfect style in which to explore the complexities of human memory.

Slow Burn
Slow Burn(2007)

Reasonably okay for a direct-to-video film, but unfortunately isn't one. Oozes melodrama, and even after an insane number of plot twists still ends how one would predict in the first 10 minutes.

Teeth
Teeth(2007)
½

Bizarre, absolutely hilarious, and a stunningly realistic portrayal of the purity movement.

Office Space
Office Space(1999)
½

A brilliant modern classic for anyone who has ever had a job anywhere.

Crank
Crank(2006)
½

Silly, sometimes a bit too silly, but all-around good fun.

Slumdog Millionaire
½

Stunning. Boyle's best since Trainspotting.

Surrogates
Surrogates(2009)
½

I really like what they were going for here, but the film didn't quite make it. Still, my expectations were immensely exceeded.

Munich
Munich(2005)

Good, but not good enough to warrant 3 hours.

Crash
Crash(2004)
½

I don't think I've ever liked a movie that's made me so uncomfortable so much.

11:14
11:14(2003)

Dark, funny, and convoluted - some of my favorite qualities in a film.

Candyman
Candyman(1992)
½

I like the slow build and the creepy atmosphere. The Candyman himself is a pretty cheesy character however.

Gattaca
Gattaca(1997)

There are a number of issues with the Gattaca universe, but the film is stylish and captivating.

Control
Control(2005)
½

Quite possibly the most mediocre film I have ever seen. Didn't like it, didn't dislike it.

Inception
Inception(2010)

Inception has some plot holes, but is fascinating overall. The visuals are fantastic, and it raises interesting philosophical issues.

Powder Blue
Powder Blue(2009)
½

The story is woven together nicely, the cinematography is great, and the acting is solid. However, there's a high schmalz factor, particularly toward the end, leaving a poor final impression of the film.

Dahmer
Dahmer(2002)
½

It's an alright film. Very slow-moving, it never bored me, nor did it grip me.

Zero Effect
Zero Effect(1997)

Pullman is great, Stiller isn't annoying. Clever and enjoyable overall, but drags in places.

The Usual Suspects
½

Classic amazing. Spacey's performance is still his best to date.

Kalifornia
Kalifornia(1993)
½

Starts off rather mediocre, but gets better. Great performances from Pitt and Lewis.

Frozen
Frozen(2010)

The film goes from implausible to laughably silly, but it's very satisfying to watch the agony of the unlikable protagonists.

Open Water
Open Water(2004)
½

At first I kept thinking, there's no way that the dive outfitters would be so incompetent as to leave someone behind, but that part actually did happen. Beyond that it's a dramatization and a bit overly, well, dramatic. The film definitely has its moments though.

Face/Off
Face/Off(1997)
½

Your standard off-the-shelf action movie, and not a particularly fine example.

The Descent
The Descent(2006)
½

If you have even a hint of claustrophobia, this will freak you the f*** out. I really disliked the protagonists, so I immensely enjoyed watching their ill, bloody fate.

Tron Legacy
Tron Legacy(2010)

Amazing to look at, story is about as strong as last time, Olivia Wilde, Daft Punk.

The Adjustment Bureau

First off, I did not realize this was a chick flick, which it is. I mean, I figured there would be some balance between action and romance, but no, merely having Matt Damon on the run is not an indication that a film will be Bourne-like at all. Worse than than, the muddled collision of determinism and free will is not only confusing, but logically inconsistent. I was generous with an extra half-star because Terence Stamp is awesome no matter what.

You Kill Me
You Kill Me(2007)
½

I liked it. It has a great cast, and rides a clever line between sombre and amusing.

Dinner for Schmucks

Not fantastic, but much better than I thought it would be. There are numerous laugh-out-loud moments.

Drugstore Cowboy

Overly dramatic at times, but solid overall.

Strange Days
Strange Days(1995)

Fairly interesting, but it drags a bit, and sometimes the L.A. future hellscape where gasoline is over $3 a gallon is downright silly.

Old School
Old School(2003)
½

I am generally not a fan of anything with Will Ferrell in it. This however is quite funny.

Alice in Wonderland

Great eye candy, but the Tim Burtonyness grows tiresome.

The Tao of Steve
½

It seems that they began to make an interesting movie, then the budget ran out, so they just spliced in the second half of some other nondescript romantic comedy. If it weren't for Donal Logue's inherent likability, it would be unwatchable.

Brooklyn's Finest
½

A very fine multifaceted police drama for the most part. I found the last ten or so minutes more than a little disappointing.

Terminator Salvation
½

Yeah, there are plot holes and cheesy lines, but I liked it. The action sequences are ample and excellent.

Minority Report
½

Visually intriguing and a fun watch.

The Boondock Saints II: All Saints Day
½

It's as if someone took every element of every bad sequel and threw them into a blender.

The Boondock Saints

The saints are most entertaining vigilante duo I've encountered.

Bulletproof Salesman
½

Fascinating subject matter and some interesting footage, but the editing is markedly annoying.

Thank You for Smoking

Clever and funny with a wide assortment of amusing, well-acted characters.

Reservoir Dogs
½

It's the film that realized the full potential of Stealers Wheel.

Sin City
Sin City(2005)

Amazing cinematography and the coolest, most stylish violence I have ever seen. Oh, and there's a narrative as well.

Altered States
½

Flat-out weird. Which I suppose is appropriate, as Lilly was completely bonkers. Visually fascinating, but the plot is nonsense.

The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy
½

It's not perfect - a lot of nuance and a good chunk of the story is missing, but I think they did a great job with what they had to work with, capturing as much of the book's essence as possible while remaining somewhat accessible to those who haven't read it. And, they kept the line about "the late Dentarthurdent."

Lord of War
Lord of War(2005)
½

Fascinating and amusing, Lord of War strikes a good balance between drama and humor.

Titanic Town
Titanic Town(2000)

A very serious film, but with bits of humor and no melodrama.

The Losers
The Losers(2010)

Not terrible, but not memorable either.

To Die For
To Die For(1995)

Hilariously dark and twisted.

The Texas Chainsaw Massacre

It's a slasher film. There, now you know the entire plot. I haven't seen the original, so can't compare, but I enjoyed this slightly more than I thought I would. There are a few laugh out loud moments, though R. Lee Ermey should have been far more comedic than he was.

Devil
Devil(2010)

Predictable plot, painful dialogue, and not particularly scary.

The Killing Fields
½

Teetering on the edge of being 5-star.

RocknRolla
RocknRolla(2008)
½

Ritchie doing what Ritchie does best.

Let's Go to Prison
½

Easily enough funny material to warrant a watch.

The Collector

It's good torture porn.

Saint John of Las Vegas

It has the raw materials of a funny movie, but is shoddily designed and assembled.

Wild Things
Wild Things(1998)

It takes a while to get moving, then it's wonderfully dark and twisted.

The Joneses
The Joneses(2010)
½

A chick flick through and through, but pretty entertaining.

The Devil's Own

What strength the story has is offset by saturation with melodrama and Irish folksiness. Basically any scene backed by Celtic music is superfluous, and that's half the movie.

The Skeptic
The Skeptic(2009)

You could find more depth and intelligence in your average Petri dish than in this script. There were several moments that gave me the heebie-jeebies, but even those were mundane.

Right at Your Door
½

For the first 10 minutes I hated the protagonist, figured the film would be rubbish, and fully expected having to turn it off. It improved in a hurry. Consistently tense and sometimes downright scary, it's not without flaw, but well worth watching.

Bones
Bones(2001)

Snoop is in it. It's gotta be somewhat cool, right? Wrong.

The Deep End
The Deep End(2001)

Well-produced, but I kept getting the sense that everything was moving in slow-motion.

Employee of the Month

I like Jessica Simpson just as much as any rational person, that is to say not at all, but her performance here is second only to that of Proactiv commercials. Seriously though, despite all the cutsieness, this is quite an amusing movie.

The Ghost Writer

Quite possibly Ewan McGregor's best performance.

Predator 2
Predator 2(1990)

Let me be clear, this is a terrible movie. However, I didn't hate it, probably because I anticipated hating it.

The Invention of Lying
½

There's a substantial amount of brilliant humor here, but finding it all requires wading through a glut of mushy sappy drippy goo.

Team America: World Police
½

I laughed so hard the first time I watched Team America, I bought the DVD. It doesn't stand up quite as well the second time around, and it has some of the same push-it-so-far-it-isn't-funny that South Park had even when it was still funny, but it's still hilarious.

Drag Me to Hell
½

The first time I tried to watch Drag Me to Hell I became more disgusted than interested, and turned it off after about 20 minutes. Another movie buff then encouraged me to see it through, so I did. It ended up being a decent film.

Cradle 2 the Grave

This takes the prize for most predictable movie I've ever seen. No exaggeration, all of the plot "twists" aren't so much foreshadowed, but spelled out in the first 10 minutes. There are two positive-but-nowhere-near-redeeming aspects: 1. Jet Li's hands-in-pockets fighting is pretty cool. 2. Mark Dacascos, aka. the Chairman of Iron Chef America, plays the villain exactly as he plays the Chairman, so is good for a laugh.

Plunkett & Macleane
½

I'm generally not fond of movies set prior to the twentieth century, and this one did not change that. It certainly has its moments, but there's plenty of boredom in between. With half the cast of Trainspotting and a decent modern soundtrack, they should have done better.

Gone Baby Gone

Very well-written and acted, though the drama is often laid on a bit thick. The best movie to broach the subject of moral consequentialism I've seen.

Code 46
Code 46(2004)
½

The film's stylishness just about makes up for the tectonic pace and weak plot.

Starship Troopers

Not a stellar production, and a significant divergence from the book, but fun, fun, fun.

The Crazies
The Crazies(2010)
½

Among the top tier of zombie flicks. (Yeah, I know they're not really zombies. Close enough.)

Green Zone
Green Zone(2010)

A solid thriller, I didn't attempt to read into anything more, and came away happy.

A Scanner Darkly
½

Not only visually fascinating, but also an intriguing story (though I can't speak as to how it compares to the book).

Zack and Miri Make a Porno
½

Much better than I expected, though I could do without seeing Jason Mewes' junk.

Session 9
Session 9(2001)

The atmosphere makes the film.

The Book of Eli
½

The ultra-badassedry of Denzel's character shifts this film from "not disagreeable" to "worth watching."

Criminal
Criminal(2004)

A relatively ho-hum story with a predictable twist ending. I prefer Reilly much more as Dr. Steve Brule.

District 9
District 9(2009)

A Disney film with a veneer of gore.

State of Play
½

For years I could only see Ben Affleck as the asshole from Fashionable Male, but recently it appears as if he's been making good movies. State of Play is constantly tense and in motion.

Paranormal Activity 2
½

Same as the first, now with extra scary.

Paranormal Activity
½

The 5% genuinely skin-crawling scary parts make it worth drifting through the sea of self-harm-ideation-inducing drivel. Just thinking about this film makes me want to perform a cranial reconstruction on the main characters with a crowbar.

Pontypool
Pontypool(2009)
½

An interesting concept, and well executed, especially with the constraint of the budget, up to a point, but fails to realize its full potential.

Contact
Contact(1997)
½

A fantastic film if you follow this advice: Stop watching at the 2-hour mark. Then, go do something satisfying, like bashing your head against a wall. Or you could do something exciting, like watching your lawn grow.

The Lodger
The Lodger(2009)
½

A bit bland, but not as awful as the critics would have you believe.

Push
Push(2009)

Convoluted perhaps, but visually dazzling and thoroughly entertaining.

The Men Who Stare at Goats

A phenomenal cast is a terrible thing to waste.

Saw
Saw(2004)
½

Transcends mere torture porn.

K-19: The Widowmaker

A well-done submarine movie, but as formulaic as a film based on real events can be.

The Taking of Pelham 1 2 3

An agreeable but not phenomenal thriller.

War, Inc.
War, Inc.(2008)
½

I love the absurdity, but miss the cohesion.

The Limey
The Limey(1999)
½

Terence Stamp's character is so awesome, he could have just stared at the camera for an hour and a half and I would have loved this film.

Hunter Prey
Hunter Prey(2009)
½

I liked the lack of overdone effects, but found Hunter Prey thoroughly boring.

Pandorum
Pandorum(2009)
½

Had potential, but fell flat.

The Hangover
The Hangover(2009)

I love Ed Helms, but I fully expected this film to be unwatchably stupid. On the contrary, it was hilariously lunatical.

The Others
The Others(2001)

At first The Others seems like something you'd catch your grandparents watching on Masterpiece Theater - not my cup of tea, as it were. Then, it gets interesting. Then, it gets exciting. Then, it all comes together and leads me to describe it as brilliant.

The Hurt Locker
½

I can't speak as to the accuracy in its portrayal of the combat action in Iraq, but it's a great war movie.

Changing Lanes

I like movies that keep me uncertain to which character to side with, and this is one. A satisfying thrill.

The Fourth Kind

I like the gimmicky cinematography better than that in most mocumentaries, and there were a few heart-thumping moments, but the film is mediocre on the whole.

The Clearing
The Clearing(2004)

A star-studded snooze-fest.

Religulous
Religulous(2008)
½

I'm not particularly a fan of Bill Maher, and indeed he is at times a bit crass here, but Religulous is absolutely brilliant. Not a good film for the abdomen, I was alternately nauseous and doubled over with laughter.

2 Fast 2 Furious
½

Slightly better than the first, in that they add a new and exciting element to racing called "turns."

The Fast and the Furious
½

Not as fast or furious as one would be led to believe.

Seven (Se7en)
½

Brilliant on all fronts.

Knowing
Knowing(2009)

Bad, but well worth your time if you have nothing better to watch.

Armored
Armored(2009)

Reasonably brainlessly entertaining.

2012
2012(2009)

Predictable and silly, yet with reasonably cool disaster scenes.

Valkyrie
Valkyrie(2008)
½

Cruise plays Stauffenberg exactly as he plays every other character. Despite that staleness, Valkyrie remains a tense, epic thriller.

The Minus Man
½

I liked the story, and Cox's performance was excellent. I can't get past Owen Wilson. He very well may be the perfect actor for the role, but I loathe seeing him on screen.

Unknown
Unknown(2006)
½

The story isn't brilliantly assembled, but an amusing watch.

Requiem for a Dream
½

Not exactly the feel-good movie of the year. Intense, dark, powerful, brilliantly constructed and performed.

The Sum of All Fears

As much as it pains me to say, Affleck is a better Jack Ryan than Ford. An outlandish plot, but a solidly entertaining thriller.

Videodrome
Videodrome(1983)
½

Absolutely bizarre - in a good way.

Whiteout
Whiteout(2009)

Some nice visual effects, but not nearly enough to make up for the dreadful plot.

Dune
Dune(1984)
½

I have not read the book, and found the film significantly confusing, but somehow fascinating at the same time.

Hard Candy
Hard Candy(2006)
½

As if I needed another reason to dislike teenage girls, Hard Candy is really, really, really, really disturbing. Engrossing. But really, really, really, really disturbing.

Predators
Predators(2010)

Is Predators a good movie? No. But it is pretty much exactly what I expected, so I was not disappointed.

Pi
Pi(1998)
½

Probably the most visually and intellectually intense film I've ever experienced, I scarcely blinked the first time I watched.

May
May(2003)

I like the fact that I was kept unsettled the entire length of the film, not sure whether to be sympathetic toward or horrified by the main character.

Manhunter
Manhunter(1986)
½

Though it diverged somewhat from the plot of the novel, I believe Manhunter to be a much more stylish and gripping adaptation than Red Dragon.

Alien
Alien(1979)
½

Another classic that I didn't first watch until decades after the fact. I expected Alien to be agreeable, but I ended up being absolutely blown away. It's fantastic on all fronts and has withstood the test of time.

Highlander
Highlander(1986)
½

Yeah, it's epic and everything, but I guess I don't really see what all the hype was about. The premise is very cool, but the film is mediocre.

Salt
Salt(2010)
½

The plot is simply ludicrous, but Salt is a marvelous thrill ride.

Moon
Moon(2009)

Intelligent and engaging.

Cabin Fever
Cabin Fever(2002)

Delightfully bloody and hilarious.

Diary of the Dead

If you can get past the preaching, quite an entertaining little film.

Solaris
Solaris(2002)

Almost painfully slow, but thoughtful enough to hold my attention.

Formula 51
Formula 51(2002)

Showed promise but didn't deliver. Robert Carlyle's character is the only thing making this film remotely worth watching.

Repo Men
Repo Men(2010)
½

Simply over the top. I don't regret watching, but I could have done without.

Law Abiding Citizen

I love finding out that those who you least suspect are actually capable of acting, and such is the case with Jamie Foxx here. Gerard Butler's vigilante super-badassedry made this a solidly entertaining film.

Unthinkable
Unthinkable(2014)
½

A failed attempt at being though-provoking, but not unwatchable.

Bad Boys II
Bad Boys II(2003)

Not the most terrible movie ever, but terrible. There are two things in its favor however: car chases and Peter Stormare with a cheesy mustache.

Felon
Felon(2008)

Stands out somewhat above other prison films in that the protagonist is an average guy.

It Might Get Loud

I could care less about Jack White, but nothing could be bad about having Jimmy Page and The Edge in the same room.

Takers
Takers(2010)
½

Banal though reasonably entertaining, and has Idris Elba.

Scott Pilgrim vs. the World
½

I'm not a fan of Michael Cera. I am however a big fan of the Scott Pilgrim books. I couldn't imagine how they could be translated to screen, but they were, and quite masterfully.

Chopper
Chopper(2001)
½

Chopper is a fascinating character. Of course, I do have a hetero man-crush on Eric Bana.

Bad Company
Bad Company(2002)

Bad Company demonstrated that no matter what terrible atrocities Anthony Hopkins perpetrates, I will always come back. Quite possibly the worst movie I have ever seen in its entirety.

Anamorph
Anamorph(2008)

I'm reminded a bit of Se7en with a dash of Red Dragon thrown in, although Anamorph isn't on par with either of those.

A Serbian Film

I cannot formulate words to describe this film, so I will use those of Scott Weinberg at Fearnet.com: "There are those who will be unable (or unwilling) to decipher even the most basic of 'messages' buried within A Serbian Film, but I believe it's one of the most legitimately fascinating films I've ever seen. I admire and detest it at the same time. And I will never watch it again. Ever."

Look
Look(2007)

This film lacks what I despise about the mockumentary genre: some annoying moron holding the camera and talking. The interwoven stories are interesting, and for the most part the camerawork does make it seem as if one could be watching real events.

Subject Two
Subject Two(2006)

In this version of Frankenstein, he gives his monster funny contact lenses instead of neck bolts. There's a certain depth lacking, and the pace is mind-numbingly slow.

Adaptation
Adaptation(2002)
½

A bit too sappy at times, but genuinely brilliant.

Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull

I had heard substantial negative feedback about the film, but when I started watching I wondered why, as it was genuinely good, worthy of the franchise. Then I saw the ending.

Turistas (Paradise Lost)

If you like movies with beautiful scenery and a beautiful cast, but don't like to get bogged down with things such as plot or dialogue, this film is for you.

Open Water 2: Adrift
½

I didn't expect a great movie, and it wasn't, but was watchable and a decent thrill. The ending was terrible however, in that even after researching it, I don't know how it ended.