Jordan Jenkins's Movie Ratings - Rotten Tomatoes

Movie Ratings and Reviews

Adam Sandler's Eight Crazy Nights

Whoever thought this movie was good for me to watch as a child must have been on something, because this was HORRIBLE!

Hotel Transylvania

Eh, I decided to watch this despite Adam Sandler being in it. It was okay. Nothing ground-breaking and all, but somewhat enjoyable to watch. I'm open to the concept of a family-man Dracula, and Adam Sandler does do a good job as the King of the Vampires, which is more than I can say for most of his other works.

Mary Poppins
Mary Poppins(1964)

Chim chimney, chim chimney, chim chim cher-ee, this film is as wondrous as wondrous can be! Chim chimney, chim chimney, chim chim cher-oo, good times will rub off when I watch this with you!

Looney Tunes: Back in Action

Well, this is it. This (almost) ruined the reputation of the Looney Tunes. Oh, sure, the Looney Tunes have comedy again, but this time, it's the lowest form of comedy. And what's worse, I don't even know half of what's going on. Most of the movie has something completely random and out of nowhere happening and the ending (also random) just leaves me about as disappointed as Porky was of not finishing his trademark ending line. I was almost happy to see Steve Martin in a Looney Tunes movie, but the result just left me frustrated that they didn't use him for what he is: a COMEDIAN!!! Did I mention Joe Dante made this to try and make up for the atrocity of Space Jam? Let that sink into your pissed-off minds.

Happily N'ever After

Why does this even exist? This has nothing on Shrek. And anything with Andy Dick as a main character feels... wrong...

All Dogs Go To Heaven 2

What the hell is this?! No Burt Reynolds?! Modern-day San Francisco?! Devil Pussy?! WHAT?!?! And you think you have the right to relace the sweetness of Anne-Marie with this douchebag kid?! SHAME!!!!!

The Pebble and the Penguin

Ah yes. The movie considered Don Bluth's worst, even by Don Bluth. I think this movie is bad, as well, but I don't think it's the worst. That medal of heinous-ity goes to A Troll In Central Park. Overall, this movie is harmless and actually has a good concept that wasn't executed well, until Happy Feet came along. I'll give this two stars, mainly because of Jim Belushi and Tim Curry's performances.

Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen

I'm starting to think Michael Bay hates childhood nastalgia. And John Turturro. As the tasteless jokes get worse, the story gets more convoluted, and more praise is given to Shia LaBeouf for no good reason. Michael Bay, I hope you drown in your explosion money.

Bartok the Magnificent

... I guess Bartok DID get a spin-off. Well, one thing's for sure. This is a first for Don Bluth. All I can say is, it's not good, but it's not bad, either. It's just disappointing.

Anastasia
Anastasia(1997)
½

What is there about this movie that is so beloved when it is clearly a Disney rip-off? Well, the songs are nice. I especially love the villain song when the back-up singers aren't bouncing purple bugs. Kelsey Grammer and Christopher Lloyd are excellent at what they do. And I guess the character of Anastasia is okay. I mean, my mother's middle name is Anastasia, so there has to be some merit to her. But what's with the side-focus on Bartok? It's not like he's getting a spin-off, is it? ... Is it?

The Secret of NIMH 2: Timmy to the Rescue

No. No.This does not exist. It should never exist. Moving on.

Freddie as F.R.O.7

... Um... This is... I think it's... WHAT THE HELL DID I JUST WATCH?! It feels more like a drug-induced fantasy dream than the next beloved animated romp. Seriously, the movie stars a prince of the Middle Ages who gets turned into a frog and apparently also a Highlander, since he now exists in 20th century England, as a "secret" agent. (Not so secret if your face is in the papers, genius.) I will say this, Brian Blessed is enjoyably over the top, so one star for you.

The Secret of NIMH

Where can you go wrong with this movie? As usual, the animation is brilliant, the story is amazing, and you will love every second of traveling with Mrs. Brisby.

An American Tail

I don't know why anyone would hate this movie. Maybe it's the new cover... Anyway, it definitely deserves more love than it gets. With amazing animation and an iconic character, An American Tail easily makes the Top 5 spot of Don Bluth's list of movies.

Beauty and the Beast

What can I say that others haven't? Get out there and buy this on DVD or Blu-Ray! Just skip over the shoe-horned musical number "Human Again". Trust me, it's absolutely unnecessary.

All Dogs Go To Heaven
½

The musical numbers are something to just skim over if you're not interested, but the character development and overall underlying message within the story make this movie worthwhile. Burt Reynolds and Dom DeLuise play off each other so well, and the story will leave you in suspense on what will happen next.

Transformers
Transformers(2007)

Ah, yes. A Transformers movie has finally been realized. Too bad it was directed by Michael Bay. Granted the action scenes are awesome, but every time something awesome happens, it's immediately followed by something stupid (i.e. Shia LaBeouf). I don't recommend this to anyone, as this movie turns the Transformers into piss-poor cheapshots (literally in Bumblebee's case).

Who Framed Roger Rabbit

Ah, yes. Now THIS is how you treat the Looney Tunes. And the Mickey Mouse gang... And... Droopy? What? Yep, this movie gets its groundbreaking status from not only successfully integrating "toons", as Eddie Valiant calls them, into reality, but also by successfully crossing them over to make some hilarious moments that keep the characters true to their characters. And Christopher Lloyd really made one of the most iconic villains ever (one that would give any viewer nightmares for weeks, maybe months...) If you're a fan of popular cartoon characters and mystery murder cases, this is definitely worth a watch.

Turtles Forever

I hate 4Kids with all of my heart, even if they did dub Pokemon. And even though I thought the 2003 Turtles were pretty cool, they had NO right to insult the 1987 Turtles! They were just as excellent fighters as their newer incarnations. (Don't believe me? Actually WATCH a few episodes, then come back.) And yet 4Kids portrays them as a bunch of dumbass babies! It's probably the real reason why the original cast didn't return for their roles! And FUCKING DAN GREEN AS LEONARDO?!?!?! I'm glad 4Kids is bankrupt! They don't deserve a single star!