Witney Seibold

Witney Seibold

Agrees with the Tomatometer 71% of the time.

Publications:
CraveOnline
Total Reviews:
61

Listing Of All Reviews & Articles

Showing 1 - 50 of 61
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Rating T-Meter Title | Year Add Date
8/10 98% Mud (2013) " It's rare that films manage to capture the actual experience of what it is like to be a child, but 'Mud' seems to nail the ethos. " — CraveOnline
Posted Apr 27, 2013
5.5/10 46% Pain & Gain (2013) " For the first time in a hugely successful career, he showed a sliver of something more sophisticated, and for that, I applaud the man for the first time." — CraveOnline
Posted Apr 26, 2013
6.5/10 56% Oblivion (2013) " 'Oblivion' is atmospheric and good-looking and nigh thrilling enough." — CraveOnline
Posted Apr 17, 2013
9/10 42% To The Wonder (2013) " Even a supposedly "lesser" Terrence Malick film like "To the Wonder" touches on some large and ultimately hopeful themes, despite its overall opaqueness." — CraveOnline
Posted Apr 11, 2013
8/10 81% The Place Beyond The Pines (2013) " An immensely thoughtful and well-constructed evolutionary analysis of the origins of crime, and how it subtly perpetuates throughout generations." — CraveOnline
Posted Mar 28, 2013
8.5/10 66% Spring Breakers (2013) " ...Harmony Korine's Spring Breakers will leave you simultaneously cold, afraid, aroused, filthy, bemused, and wholly unsettled, bleeding and masturbating, half-conscious, at the bottom of a pit full of Bud Light and marijuana residue." — CraveOnline
Posted Mar 22, 2013
6.5/10 39% The Call (2013) " Even when 'The Call' takes a hard left turn into implausible stupidity, it's still kinda fun." — CraveOnline
Posted Mar 15, 2013
7/10 29% Upside Down (2013) " 'Upside Down,' in terms of its visuals, is gorgeous and clever and creative." — CraveOnline
Posted Mar 14, 2013
6/10 38% The Incredible Burt Wonderstone (2013) " Sweet and good-natured and periodically chuckle-worthy." — CraveOnline
Posted Mar 14, 2013
5.5/10 47% The Sweeney (2013) " The film is just stylized enough to register as above average, but on the whole it's pretty forgettable - the kind of film you describe with a noncommittal "interesting," while walking out of the theater. " — CraveOnline
Posted Mar 2, 2013
2/10 —— A Talking Cat!?! () " It's not quite crazy or energetic enough to be a proper Bad Movie Night kind of movie... indeed the film is pretty effing boring." — CraveOnline
Posted Feb 20, 2013
6.5/10 85% Side Effects (2013) " Most certainly not a trumpet blast of the Steven Soderbergh's energies... but it's a pretty good thriller from an interesting director." — CraveOnline
Posted Feb 7, 2013
5/10 4% Movie 43 (2013) " If testicles and poop... are enough for you, maybe "Movie 43" will be your cup of (*ulp*) tea." — CraveOnline
Posted Jan 25, 2013
7.5/10 65% Mama (2013) " Fun ghost story, awesome monster, and Jessica Chastain dressed as Joan Jett. What more could you want? " — CraveOnline
Posted Jan 18, 2013
6.5/10 98% The Loved Ones (2012) " I kinda dug the flick." — CraveOnline
Posted Jan 8, 2013
9.5/10 90% Holy Motors (2012) " Weird, baffling, and the lunatic work of a powerfully ambitious filmmaker, 'Holy Motors' is one of the best films of the year. " — CraveOnline
Posted Nov 16, 2012
8.5/10 49% The Man With the Iron Fists (2012) " It occupies a middle ground between the '70s-obsessed eye of Tarantino, and the bold magical silliness of 'Big Trouble in Little China'" — CraveOnline
Posted Nov 1, 2012
7/10 —— Werewolf: The Beast Among Us (Unrated) (2012) " Resemble[s] a second-tier badass action flick from the mid-1980s." — CraveOnline
Posted Oct 24, 2012
8.5/10 96% Argo (2012) " Its politics are subtle, its performances are good, and its script is amazing." — CraveOnline
Posted Oct 24, 2012
7.5/10 25% Paranormal Activity 4 (2012) " A sweet scary little night at the movies. " — CraveOnline
Posted Oct 24, 2012
3.5/10 51% Trouble with the Curve (2012) " To call this film corny would be an insult to corn." — CraveOnline
Posted Sep 21, 2012
8/10 85% End of Watch (2012) " End of Watch was a surprise. I liked it a lot. " — CraveOnline
Posted Sep 21, 2012
6.5/10 50% The Tall Man (2012) " A spooky and atmospheric little thriller that contains some actual and unexpected surprises." — CraveOnline
Posted Sep 1, 2012
7.5/10 78% The Ambassador (2012) " Full of incredulous guffaws at the open and expected corruption in this part of the world. But don't expect to be tickled. This film is making a point." — CraveOnline
Posted Sep 1, 2012
7/10 58% Red State (2011) " It's an often-funny, sometimes precious, but always kind-of-scary little flick worth a note. If this was Smith's first film, he would be touted as a new talent to watch out for." — CraveOnline
Posted Aug 25, 2012
8/10 85% The Ides of March (2011) " The entire first two thirds of the film have the calm idiosyncratic qualities of a mellowed-out Mamet." — CraveOnline
Posted Aug 25, 2012
8.5/10 63% Young Goethe In Love (2011) " It's just as gorgeously shot, just as clever, just as frothy and dynamic as the period pieces of 15-20 years ago." — CraveOnline
Posted Aug 25, 2012
4/10 —— Pete Smalls is Dead (2011) " "Pete Smalls is Dead" nearly kills itself with an overdose of cutesy mainlined hipsterism." — CraveOnline
Posted Aug 25, 2012
6.5/10 —— Showgirls 2: Penny's from Heaven () " The film itself is a daunting and swirling phantasmagoria of storylines, weird back-and-forths, and just as much bizarro character vacillation as its predecessor." — CraveOnline
Posted Aug 25, 2012
7.5/10 95% Knuckle (2011) " A dark, brutal, black hole world of casual physical violence." — CraveOnline
Posted Aug 25, 2012
8/10 74% Rampart (2012) " No thrills, no secret plots, and no obvious politics, "Rampart" is a powerful and moving look into an empty person. " — CraveOnline
Posted Aug 25, 2012
3/10 54% Dr Seuss' The Lorax (2012) " Three minutes of substance, 91 minutes of shrill filler." — CraveOnline
Posted Aug 25, 2012
7.5/10 86% Sound of Noise (2012) " The premise is so delightfully strange, it almost sounds like an Etgar Keret short story, or maybe even a playful exercise by Gabriel García Márquez." — CraveOnline
Posted Aug 25, 2012
8/10 75% Surviving Progress (2012) " But this is not a film interested in partisan finger-wagging, nor is it looking to place blame directly on one specific group or another (despite some pretty heavy glances toward [some] politicians). No. "Surviving Progress" is more philosophical." — CraveOnline
Posted Aug 25, 2012
8.5/10 86% The Pirates! Band of Misfits (2012) " Yes, the film feels childish, but in the best possible way." — CraveOnline
Posted Aug 25, 2012
8/10 80% Get the Gringo (2012) " It could have been too quirky for its own good, [but] as it stands... "Get the Gringo" is surprisingly good, coming out of left field the way it did. " — CraveOnline
Posted Aug 25, 2012
6.5/10 23% The Raven (2012) " Entertaining and fun to be sure, despite it's goofy premise. But it's not nearly as chilling as reading Poe's stories for yourself." — CraveOnline
Posted Aug 25, 2012
4.5/10 13% Meeting Evil (2012) " A cheap slasher flick with some talented actors masking the banality with clever dialogue..." — CraveOnline
Posted Aug 25, 2012
5/10 93% Indie Game: The Movie (2012) " Watching [a programmer] reboot a computer at a trade show over and over again was hardly what I'd call stirring cinema." — CraveOnline
Posted Aug 25, 2012
6/10 81% A Cat in Paris (2012) " Come for the film, stay for the urban-mural visuals, leave vaguely satisfied." — CraveOnline
Posted Aug 25, 2012
6.5/10 27% High School (2012) " Surprisingly solid and funny... It's rare for a stoner comedy to have so much ambition." — CraveOnline
Posted Aug 25, 2012
7/10 —— Fuzz Track City () " Rewards the rock snob... Casts an old-timey light on a genre that often only banks on updated gimmicks." — CraveOnline
Posted Aug 25, 2012
8.5/10 67% The Pact (2012) " Quite easily, one of the scariest films I've seen in a long while... It's a corker." — CraveOnline
Posted Aug 25, 2012
2/10 29% Peace, Love, & Misunderstanding (2012) " Somewhere Alison Bechdel is screaming." — CraveOnline
Posted Aug 25, 2012
8/10 54% Wallander: The Revenge (2012) " A cop movie for grown ups. Or at least sophisticated teenagers... It's just great filmmaking." — CraveOnline
Posted Aug 25, 2012
8/10 82% Nobody Else But You (2012) " You will watch this film with a baffled smirk on your face. At least I did." — CraveOnline
Posted Aug 25, 2012
5/10 22% 6 Month Rule (2012) " Budget indie-house comfort food for the '90s-romcom-besotted soul." — CraveOnline
Posted Aug 25, 2012
1/10 21% That's My Boy (2012) " As a whole, the film is startlingly ugly." — CraveOnline
Posted Aug 25, 2012
9/10 46% Beyond The Black Rainbow (2012) " The product of a fevered mad auteur... May prove to be one of the more rewarding and disturbing film experiences in many a year." — CraveOnline
Posted Aug 25, 2012
Showing 1 - 50 of 61
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