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Battleship (2012)

tomatometer

34

Average Rating: 4.6/10
Reviews Counted: 208
Fresh: 71 | Rotten: 137

It may offer energetic escapism for less demanding filmgoers, but Battleship is too loud, poorly written, and formulaic to justify its expense -- and a lot less fun than its source material.

29

Average Rating: 4.5/10
Critic Reviews: 41
Fresh: 12 | Rotten: 29

It may offer energetic escapism for less demanding filmgoers, but Battleship is too loud, poorly written, and formulaic to justify its expense -- and a lot less fun than its source material.

audience

55

liked it
Average Rating: 3.4/5
User Ratings: 454,259

My Rating

Movie Info

Peter Berg produces and directs Battleship, an epic-scaled action-adventure that unfolds across the seas, in the skies and over land as our planet fights for survival against a superior force. Inspired by Hasbro's classic naval combat game, Battleship stars Taylor Kitsch as Lt. Alex Hopper, a Naval officer assigned to the USS John Paul Jones; Brooklyn Decker as Sam Shane, a physical therapist and Hopper's fiancée; Alexander Skarsgård as Hopper's older brother, Stone, Commanding Officer of the

Aug 28, 2012

$65.2M

Universal - Official Site External Icon

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All Critics (208) | Top Critics (41) | Fresh (71) | Rotten (137) | DVD (4)

Once the special effects take over, Berg has little room to assert his personality (or tell a story, for that matter), and the movie feels like a chore.

May 24, 2012 Full Review Source: Chicago Reader | Comments (14)
Chicago Reader
Top Critic IconTop Critic

Battleship is substantially less awful than it could have been. And for me, that may have been the biggest disappointment of all.

May 18, 2012 Full Review Source: The Atlantic | Comments (10)
The Atlantic
Top Critic IconTop Critic

If the movie is anything like the game, I say stay at home and read a good book (or graphic novel). Or listen to an audiobook - In short, do anything else.

May 18, 2012 Full Review Source: Christian Science Monitor | Comments (9)
Christian Science Monitor
Top Critic IconTop Critic

Big loud stupid dopey shameless cliched overbearing and did I mention stupid?

May 18, 2012 Full Review Source: Richard Roeper.com | Comments (25)
Richard Roeper.com
Top Critic IconTop Critic

One can be sure that heroic characters get what they want, bond with enemies, and earn respect.

May 18, 2012 Full Review Source: Globe and Mail | Comments (2)
Globe and Mail
Top Critic IconTop Critic

"Battleship" doesn't sink, really. It just sits there booming endlessly as you look on aghast.

May 18, 2012 Full Review Source: Detroit News | Comments (22)
Detroit News
Top Critic IconTop Critic

Long, loud and pedestrian, this drama only gets exciting in its closing minutes.

June 30, 2013 Full Review Source: Big Hollywood
Big Hollywood

An assault on reason, logic and complex characterisation, but in an enjoyable way, like a slightly less camp dramatisation of the Village People's finest ship-based sing-song.

March 4, 2013 Full Review Source: Film4

Just like the board game, assuming the board game cost $200 million and was dumb.

March 4, 2013 Full Review Source: Concrete Playground
Concrete Playground

We should celebrate the explicit nature, the unabashed and unapologetic chutzpah of a film that dares to be stupid, yet does so with so much intelligence.

January 9, 2013 Full Review Source: Twitch
Twitch

This cheap-looking dung heap doesn't even bother hiding its contempt for paying audiences, and the lack of pretension almost justifies the cynicism on display.

November 5, 2012
Projection Booth

What starts out as a seriously tense naval war thriller ends up being Pearl Harbour II: Intergalactic Boogaloo.

October 25, 2012 Full Review Source: TheShiznit.co.uk | Comment (1)
TheShiznit.co.uk

Battleship is a movie that is enjoyable beyond expectation, but doesn't offer much more than the fast-food-style fun of a summer movie spectacle.

October 2, 2012 Full Review Source: ScreenRant
ScreenRant

It's not satire, it doesn't play on two levels like Starship Troopers, it's just s---... As a piece of miscalculated, American wankery, it is almost unparalleled.

September 27, 2012 Full Review Source: The Aristocrat | Comment (1)
The Aristocrat

Watch the movie for its spectacle and nothing else.

September 24, 2012 Full Review Source: 7M Pictures
7M Pictures

A silly summer popcorn flick that tries too hard to be witty and tongue-in-cheek while still embracing its deadly serious commitment to being the ultimate blow-em-up action extravaganza.

September 15, 2012 Full Review Source: We Got This Covered
We Got This Covered

It really should have been obvious to everyone involved that it was going to turn out like this.

September 14, 2012 Full Review Source: Examiner.com
Examiner.com

Believe it or not, no one ever says the game's signature line. So, lets say it here, all together and with enthusiasm, "You sunk my Battleship!"

September 13, 2012 Full Review Source: CinemaBlend.com
CinemaBlend.com

It appears a Hollywood boardroom has scraped the bottom of the barrel of originality to come up with a very long, very loud movie with almost nothing new to say.

September 10, 2012 Full Review Source: FoxNews.com
FoxNews.com

Direction is sharp, but the dull assembly line story damages this hokey action picture that's occasionally so bad it's good.

August 28, 2012 Full Review Source: IGN DVD
IGN DVD

Battleship is to chicken burritos what The Avengers was to shawarma.

August 22, 2012 Full Review Source: CraveOnline | Comments (3)
CraveOnline

Maybe it wasn't too smart to turn this Hasbro game into an alien-invasion movie.

July 13, 2012 Full Review Source: honeycuttshollywood.com | Comment (1)
honeycuttshollywood.com

For an action flick that starts to sink right out of port, 'Battleship' does take a clever turn. But, boy, do you have to wait a long time for it to smarten up.

June 23, 2012 Full Review Source: Quad City Times (Davenport, IA)
Quad City Times (Davenport, IA)

Any movie based on Battleship that doesn't at least throw in a PT boat isn't worthy of the name.

June 14, 2012 Full Review Source: Salt Lake Tribune
Salt Lake Tribune

... it sounds incredibly dumb -- and it is, but not without a little fun.

June 1, 2012 Full Review Source: Sacramento News & Review
Sacramento News & Review

I am a sucker for these kinds of big, dumb action movies (I liked "John Carter" and "The Green Lantern" too), particularly if they have a good deal of science fiction in them, and this one does.

May 30, 2012 Full Review Source: Laramie Movie Scope | Comments (22)
Laramie Movie Scope

Audience Reviews for Battleship

Surprisingly okay for a film based on a game as plotless as Battleship. My favourite part was when they actually played it.
February 24, 2014
vierasesine

Super Reviewer

Battleship is a cross between a US Navy Recruitment campaign and a film based on a board game. It is as odd as that sounds. The army message of 'Your life won't amass to anything without us' message is a bit sickening and the 'Those left disabled by war are still useful' message even more so. The acting is dreadful, the script is baffling, the story is laughable, the cast is a strange mix of could do better and couldn't do any better and the aliens are rubbish. And yet for some strange reason I quite enjoyed it. I don't understand it either!
February 25, 2013
SirPant

Super Reviewer

Sometimes you just want to turn your brain off and watch things getting blown up. This picture fits the bill perfectly. Don't try and think - don't notice the obvious plot contrivances, the cartoonish caricatures, the total implausibility - manage all that and you have a decent, fairly entertaining film... but we've come to bury Caesar, not to praise him - so....

In spite of some decent special effects and the glory of seeing the Mighty Mo pressed back into action, this film reeks of "been there, seen that". All the characters being in the right place at the right (or wrong, depending on your point of view) time - the obvious attempt at establishing a rivalry that of course ends up being a plot device where the two just have to get along for the good of the planet - the hackneyed love affair ... all are attempts to give this film more weight - and frankly, the film would have been just as good (and I use that term lightly) without them.

At the center of the film are those pretty cool aliens and their uber cool starships. Add to it the race against time as said aliens attempt to call in reinforcements, and you've got a nice action film that, for my money, does a much better and concise job of giving you that action than the Transformer films.

That the aliens have a weakness and that the weakness isn't something you want to think too hard about is typical - but when it keeps getting thrown in your face, over and over, makes it hard to ignore. You also try to ignore that the aliens have a device like the ultimate saws-all that can repeatedly cut through anything without ever dulling - and yet for some reason they didn't arm their ships with the same metal, making it easy to destroy them with regular (non nuke) firepower (although it is hilarious to see the US Navy shooting at these high tech battlewagons with machine guns - yeah, like that's gonna hurt em!). Then try to ignore that, as the alien ships are cruising through space, they somehow don't have the guidance capabilities to avoid hitting a satellite (hmm, they traveled across how many million parsecs of space and missed all kinds of meteors and other space garbage only to crash into a satellite when coming down the home stretch???)

I haven't mentioned the acting here, and really there is no need to - they all play their part, regurgitate the lines they are given without seeming too wooden, in spite of the cartoonish nature of the characters they are playing. But really, this film is about the alien ships and how the navy combats them. Nicely done in most regards and make this worth a watch if you just want to be entertained by mindless action.

I also want to mention that the synopsis for the film that came up on DirecTV mentioned that this film is based on the Hasbro game of the same name. I looked twice and said, "WTF" - no way... but yes, it's true - there is a segment of the film that is like playing the children's game Battleship. Wow - wonder how much Hasbro donated to make that happen.
February 11, 2013
maxthesax
paul sandberg

Super Reviewer

I was pleasantly surprised at this, fearing another alien film closer to Skyline, this was a lot more like Independence Day at sea!! The SFX are really great and certainly has a impressive feel to it. There is plenty of action and a mix of humour as well with a well chosen cast. Yep it seems to skip a bit of the story early on in the film, unless I missed a 1 year later text pop up? At times it could almost be an advert for the American Navy, past and present. It manages to pay homage to the Battleship game as well in one scene, and Brooklyn Decker is great eye candy. If you enjoy a no-brainer, fun action film....like Independence day, then you'll have a blast!
November 30, 2012
Deano78

Super Reviewer

    1. Alex Hopper: I want you to know that I am in love with your daughter. And I am asking permission to marry your daughter.
    2. Admiral Shane: No.
    3. Alex Hopper: Sir, I saved the world.
    4. Admiral Shane: Saving the world is one thing, Hopper. My daughter is quite another. If you'll excuse me, I'm late for lunch. I think I'll have a chicken burrito. Come along Hopper. We'll discuss the terms of your surrender over a meal.
    – Submitted by George P (7 months ago)
    1. Chief Engineer Hiroki: Your mother named you Beast?
    2. Chief Petty Officer Walter "The Beast" Lynch: Don't worry about my mother.
    – Submitted by Joji Y (8 months ago)
    1. Admiral Shane: Saving the world is one thing; marrying my daughter is something else.
    – Submitted by Denise M (11 months ago)
    1. Lieutenant Alex Hopper: We need to find a way to destroy that communications relay.
    2. Petty Officer Cora "Weps" Raikes: Our last ship was just sunk, and we barely got off it. And we are compeltly cut off from the rest of the fleet. We don't have anything else.
    3. Lieutenant Alex Hopper: Yes, we do. [stares at the battleship Mississippi anchored in the harbor] We have a battleship.
    – Submitted by Stephan V (18 months ago)
    1. Captain Yugi Nagata: [on the bridge with Hopper discussing how to track the aliens] What if we could see them without seeing them?
    2. Lieutenant Alex Hopper: Don't tell me you're talking about the Art of War. I've read that book six times, and it still dosen't make any sense to me. How do you fight the enemy where they are not?
    3. Captain Yugi Nagata: That is a Chinese book. Display NOAA data on the bridge monitor. [all NOAA data from buoys is displayed] Now, set grid formation. [a square grid appears on the monitor, and each buoy is in the center of a square] There's one right over there. [a square shows a large displacement of water from the buoy's measurements]
    – Submitted by Stephan V (18 months ago)
    1. Petty Officer Cora "Weps" Raikes: Mahalo motherfucker.
    – Submitted by Typhon Q (19 months ago)
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