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G.I. Joe: Rise of Cobra (2009)

tomatometer

33

Average Rating: 4.6/10
Reviews Counted: 157
Fresh: 52 | Rotten: 105

While fans of the Hasbro toy franchise may revel in a bit of nostalgia, G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra is largely a cartoonish, over-the-top action fest propelled by silly writing, inconsistent visual effects, and merely passable performances.

24

Average Rating: 3.8/10
Critic Reviews: 25
Fresh: 6 | Rotten: 19

While fans of the Hasbro toy franchise may revel in a bit of nostalgia, G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra is largely a cartoonish, over-the-top action fest propelled by silly writing, inconsistent visual effects, and merely passable performances.

audience

62

liked it
Average Rating: 3.3/5
User Ratings: 934,737

My Rating

Movie Info

Director Stephen Sommers (The Mummy, Van Helsing) adapts the beloved Hasbro G.I. Joe toy line with this Paramount Pictures production that pits the Global Integrated Joint Operating Entity against the evil forces of the organization known as Cobra. Dennis Quaid and Channing Tatum star as General Hawk and Duke Hauser, respectively, with Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Marlon Wayans leading the rest of the cast, including Sienna Miller, Ray Park, Rachel Nichols, Christopher Eccleston, Adewale

Nov 3, 2009

$150.2M

Paramount Pictures

Cast

All Critics (157) | Top Critics (25) | Fresh (52) | Rotten (106) | DVD (4)

Loud, shiny, and critic-proof, this franchise launcher is basically Transformers minus the humanity.

August 20, 2009 Full Review Source: Chicago Reader | Comments (9)
Chicago Reader
Top Critic IconTop Critic

[Director] Sommers did the first two chaotic Mummy remakes; those play like Tender Mercies compared to this one.

August 14, 2009 Full Review Source: Chicago Tribune | Comments (3)
Chicago Tribune
Top Critic IconTop Critic

After a first hour that plays like a bad TV show, Sommers hits his groove with an over-the-top Paris chase sequence that, in turn, leads to an underwater finale that's absurdly overproduced, momentarily diverting, and then instantly forgettable.

August 12, 2009 Full Review Source: Village Voice | Comment (1)
Village Voice
Top Critic IconTop Critic

Sometimes, a film defies conventional narrative and artistic standards so utterly that it seems unfair to judge it by them.... Consider this a tone poem in 40 scraps of dialogue.

August 11, 2009 Full Review Source: New Republic | Comments (9)
New Republic
Top Critic IconTop Critic

This pricey, juiceless pulp could never have been killed by critics, simply because it was already dead.

August 11, 2009 Comments (2)
New York Times
Top Critic IconTop Critic

OK, it's seriously deficient in plot or acting. But in this genre, those two ingredients are as superfluous as canoes in a desert.

August 11, 2009 Full Review Source: Philadelphia Inquirer | Comment
Philadelphia Inquirer
Top Critic IconTop Critic

Here comes GI Joe, a film so loud and dumb it makes Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen look like a Mike Leigh docudrama.

October 27, 2010 Full Review Source: Quickflix | Comment

As is usually the case, the seething bad guys make for far more "interesting" onscreen characters than the heroes.

August 9, 2010 Full Review Source: sbs.com.au | Comment
sbs.com.au

Joe is the latest bloated float in Sommers's sad parade of cinematic shame...a glorified Cannon Films production with a nasty case of ADD."

June 2, 2010 Full Review Source: BrianOrndorf.com | Comment
BrianOrndorf.com

G.I. Joe: Rise Of Cobra is a very throwaway experience, likely to be forgotten by the film world very quickly.

April 15, 2010 Full Review Source: Fan The Fire | Comment
Fan The Fire

G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra is like a term paper that fulfills the word count requirement and drops in key phrases to demonstrate some familiarity with the material but is largely filler.

January 31, 2010 Full Review Source: Reel Times: Reflections on Cinema | Comment
Reel Times: Reflections on Cinema

It's just as you would expect: poorly acted, conventionally written and occasionally fun.

December 12, 2009 Full Review Source: Oscar Guy | Comment
Oscar Guy

... it's actually better (again, the wrong word; "not nearly as awful" is closer to correct) than the recent Transformers sequel, and significantly shorter to boot.

December 6, 2009 Full Review Source: Seanax.com | Comment
Seanax.com

We're glad we didn't pay full price for our movie tickets.

November 14, 2009 Full Review Source: Sci-Fi Movie Page | Comment

Light entertainment with little to call memorable ... but at least therein exists some detectable evidence that the filmmakers had a soft spot for G.I. Joe and simply wanted to deliver its essence to the screen.

November 7, 2009 Full Review Source: Window to the Movies | Comment
Window to the Movies

expensively produced escapist fantasy designed to protect the delicate sensibilities of the kids while never for a moment taxing their budding critical thinking skills

October 31, 2009 Full Review Source: Killer Movie Reviews | Comment (1)
Killer Movie Reviews

Un film bâclé qui n'obéit à aucune logique physique ou narrative

October 12, 2009 Full Review Source: Panorama | Comment

A typically frenetic actioner from Stephen Sommers...

September 25, 2009 Full Review Source: Reel Film Reviews | Comment (1)
Reel Film Reviews

This is an action film highlight reel, with any sense of story or purpose shoved to the corners.

August 23, 2009 Full Review Source: eFilmCritic.com | Comment
eFilmCritic.com

There are bound to be some 10-year-olds who will shout a hearty "Yo Joe!" (the G.I. Joe battle cry). The rest of us will more likely be crying, "Say it ain't so, Joe!"

August 18, 2009 Full Review Source: Christianity Today | Comments (5)

Fans will be disappointed unless they're so desperate that they'll like anything that says it's a G.I. JOE movie.

August 16, 2009 Full Review Source: Sin Magazine | Comments (2)
Sin Magazine

The folks at Hasbro must be laughing all the way to the bank this summer.

August 16, 2009 Full Review | Comments (2)
Quad City Times (Davenport, IA)

This is my favorite bad movie of the summer. And yes, I realize that's a backhanded compliment. Yo Joe.

August 15, 2009 Full Review Source: The Scorecard Review | Comment
The Scorecard Review
More Critic Reviews

Audience Reviews for G.I. Joe: Rise of Cobra

Okay I watched it . . I cant help it but I liked it. I know its not PURE the comics and thank god not pure the movies. But omg i had fun watching this movie from start to finish. Pure action from start to finish. Eye candy is all this was as my brain didnt even need to engage for it. No thought needed. Much fun

August 10, 2009
jmanard52

Super Reviewer

three Stars

December 28, 2011
MizturY0da
MisterYoda ?

Super Reviewer

    1. Heavy Duty: [about handling the accelerator suits] Careful. They're worth millions of dollars each.
    2. Ripcord: [in a suit] Millions of dollars. Got it. [falls out of the van]
    3. Heavy Duty: Jesus...
    4. Ripcord: My bad. My bad. Won't happen again! [gets smacked by a car]
    – Submitted by Nick S (44 days ago)
    1. Ripcord: All right, ladies! Mount up!
    – Submitted by Chris P (9 months ago)
    1. General Hawk: Technically, G.I. Joe does not exist, but if it did, it'd be comprised of the top men and women from the top military units in the world, the alpha dog's. When all else fails, we don't.
    – Submitted by Chris P (9 months ago)

Movies Like G.I. Joe: Rise of Cobra

Latest News for G.I. Joe: Rise of Cobra

May 3, 2011:
Joseph Gordon-Levitt Won't Return for G.I. Joe 2
Whatever dastardly plot faces the real American heroes in "G.I. Joe 2," it won't involve Joseph...

March 4, 2011:
A Smaller Cast for the G.I. Joe Sequel?
Most big-budget sequels only get bigger, but according to Rachel Nichols, that won't apply to the...

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Foreign Titles

  • G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra (DE)
  • G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra (UK)
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