|
50%
|
Now You See Me (2013)
|
" ...the plot of Queen Latifah and Katie Holmes' 'Mad Money' is more doable."
|
Dave White
|
|
73%
|
The Kings of Summer (2013)
|
"The filmmakers... opt for a mostly witty Sundance-branded coming-of-age sitcom featuring lucky good looks, accelerated maturity, sexual ease, quick wits, cooperative facial hair and a distinct lack of teenage awkwardness."
|
Dave White
|
|
71%
|
The East (2013)
|
"[Its] tidiness lets audiences off the hook the same way a kill-the-bad-guy B-movie would, throwing cold water on provocation..."
|
Dave White
|
|
11%
|
After Earth (2013)
|
"This movie... is about nobody's pleasure or deep vision. It is, instead, about positioning two actors in the power structure of the film industry. "
|
Dave White
|
|
38%
|
The Purge (2013)
|
"...quickly forgets its fake concern because there's too much awesome stalking, stabbing and shrieking demanding camera time, too many luxury objects that cry out to be righteously smashed by bad guy skulls. "
|
Dave White
|
|
84%
|
Much Ado About Nothing (2013)
|
"All the play's barbed retorts and quickly shifting allegiances move more like friendly, sarcastic game of badminton. Sometimes that fast-paced TV work ethic is just what you need."
|
Dave White
|
|
34%
|
The Internship (2013)
|
"...prison never felt this much like a bouncy-house."
|
Dave White
|
|
85%
|
This Is the End (2013)
|
"They've tapped into the inherent psychedelia of Revelation and enhanced it with absurdity, scatology, Ecstasy, weed and a contemporary secular ignorance informed by Terminator movies."
|
Dave White
|
|
55%
|
Man of Steel (2013)
|
"It's the pointed focus on science fiction that elevates Man of Steel beyond that of "just another Superman movie.""
|
Scott Weinberg
|
|
55%
|
Man of Steel (2013)
|
"This is the right Superman at the right time, the return that feels most welcome."
|
Dave White
|
|
55%
|
Man of Steel (2013)
|
"Where Man of Steel really succeeds is in its power to connect, emotionally and spiritually, with its audience. "
|
Erik Davis
|
|
20%
|
The Hangover Part III (2013)
|
"You chase Ken Jeong around and you crash into stuff with your cars and Zach Galifianakis falls off things. All jokes recycled, lifelessly. Radical."
|
Dave White
|
|
87%
|
Star Trek Into Darkness (2013)
|
"Remember, this is the summer movie season, where spectacle trumps all, and boy does this movie know how to show off its more spectacular moments. Trust me, you'll have a good time."
|
Erik Davis
|
|
88%
|
Upstream Color (2013)
|
"It's not designed to stump or baffle but to beckon you into its wondrously chilly gray world. If it takes a few viewings to unlock (most of) its secrets then lucky you; you spent high-quality time you might have wasted on Pain & Gain."
|
Dave White
|
|
54%
|
The Reluctant Fundamentalist (2013)
|
"...the movie goes full-tilt sledgehammer with parallels between the corporate culture of greed where quotidian terrorism involves ruining workers' lives and the more clear-cut brand of blowing-up-everybody terror."
|
Dave White
|
|
55%
|
Oblivion (2013)
|
"Kosinki is no hack. He's made a gorgeous-looking experience, the kind they invented IMAX to accommodate. He's a pastiche artist, cribbing stylishness and building his own beautiful ice sculpture..."
|
Dave White
|
|
47%
|
The Lords of Salem (2013)
|
"Zombie loves taking his beloved spouse and turning her into a demonic witch-Madonna while The Velvet Underground drones "All Tomorrow's Parties." As horror it's not horrifying, but as a valentine to creepshow romance it's almost heartwarming"
|
Dave White
|
|
45%
|
Pain & Gain (2013)
|
"[Casts] the fictional approximations of the real-life victims as somehow deserving their fate in an effort to create sympathy for its three bumbling anti-heroes. In other words it's an insult to true stories."
|
Dave White
|
|
7%
|
The Big Wedding (2013)
|
"I'm... pleased?... not sure if that's the right word... surprised or relieved, maybe, like finding out you get to be the front part of the human centipede... to report that this not-very-good wedding farce is also not the worst film of all time."
|
Dave White
|
|
99%
|
Mud (2013)
|
"...a respectful, storyteller's approach to rural America. No mockery, no Hollywood-knows-better, no nonsense. That kind of thing is in shorter supply than the universe's collective desire for McConaughey to return to rom-coms."
|
Dave White
|
|
77%
|
42 (2013)
|
"It's flamboyantly square and corny. It starts big and gets even bigger, demanding that you get on board. It offers zero surprises and a palatable historical glossiness, but also terrific David-slays-Goliath pleasures."
|
Dave White
|
|
4%
|
Scary Movie 5 (2013)
|
"yap yap yap yap yap..."
|
Dave White
|
|
62%
|
Evil Dead (2013)
|
"The very satisfying result is a lovingly crafted, chaotically loud noise-symphony conducted in honor of evisceration, agony, vomit and other gnarly delights."
|
Dave White
|
|
56%
|
The Company You Keep (2013)
|
"Redford decided we needed a non-thrilling political thriller... where the worst of what '60s radicalism had to offer is given a platform to chirp, "Gee, we thought we were doing the right thing.""
|
Dave White
|
|
9%
|
The Host (2013)
|
"Space-Ronan kisses a boy and her inner human screams "NO!," slaps the confused male, then runs off to brood by a rock, staring into space. It will make sense to some of you."
|
Dave White
|
|
16%
|
Temptation (2013)
|
"[Perry's] characters, if they could speak outside of his universe, would do nothing but scream in agony as life crushes them in its God-shaped vise of moral consequence. And that is awesome to watch."
|
Dave White
|
|
94%
|
Room 237 (2013)
|
""Anything you say, Lloyd. Anything you say.""
|
Dave White
|
|
28%
|
G.I. Joe: Retaliation (2013)
|
"Enjoy the stupid; I kind of did."
|
Dave White
|
|
29%
|
Upside Down (2013)
|
"What if I told you that the film also includes scenes of upward urination and consumption of flying pink pancakes? Now will you help it break the $30,000 [box office] mark?"
|
Dave White
|
|
38%
|
Admission (2013)
|
"So both Liz Lemon and Tina Fey got their wish. Except Liz's costs you nothing: the Grizz sitcom isn't real or asking for 100 minutes of your life. Fey's wish resulted in this movie, this dull, terrible, lifeless movie. The one where she talks to a cow."
|
Dave White
|
|
47%
|
Olympus Has Fallen (2013)
|
"If nothing else it means, for the moment at least, that our long national Gerard Butler rom-com nightmare is over."
|
Dave White
|
|
69%
|
The Croods (2013)
|
"It's the Ice Age that isn't terrible and Cage, as the voice of papa caveman Grug, delivers his most interesting, energized, mainstream performance since... well, since I forget."
|
Dave White
|
|
47%
|
Olympus Has Fallen (2013)
|
"Because it mirrors Die Hard instead of desperately trying to one-up the first masterpiece, it succeeds as being the most entertaining Die Hard sequel we've seen in years."
|
Sean O'Connell
|
|
45%
|
On the Road (2012)
|
"They did what they wanted, even if it wasn't always that much, and they did it stylishly. While on drugs."
|
Dave White
|
|
81%
|
The Impossible (2012)
|
"...come for the drama, just be ready to leave your nagging questions outside the theater."
|
Dave White
|
|
47%
|
Cirque Du Soleil: Worlds Away (2012)
|
"...it's a tourism brochure, a very long, very sparkly infomercial for one-handed pushups..."
|
Dave White
|
|
41%
|
The Call (2013)
|
"...off the rails it flies in a final act that throws everything these characters should know out the window, grabbing at chunks of Silence of the Lambs, Taken, I Spit on Your Grave and anything else it can get its suddenly-dumb little hands on."
|
Dave White
|
|
65%
|
Spring Breakers (2013)
|
"... it isn't so much a movie about freedom or rule-breaking as it is about every generation's conformity to overwhelming pressure, about how human behavior is learned from repeated exposure to really dumb, low-level stuff..."
|
Dave White
|
|
88%
|
Django Unchained (2012)
|
"It's exactly what you expect from Tarantino, so if this movie finds itself challenged in any way, it's in being expected."
|
Dave White
|
|
69%
|
Les Misérables (2012)
|
"Within the first six numbers (in a musical containing 666 of them)... Fantine... has lost her job, her teeth, her hair, her prostitute-trainee badge and her life, but not before she sings the weepiest, most maddeningly catchy Susan Boyle song in the world"
|
Dave White
|
|
51%
|
Promised Land (2013)
|
"Its quiet nature may give it longer legs over time, slipping its way into cable viewing, but it'll have to reach way beyond the typically urban Gus Van Sant audience to make the impact it wants."
|
Dave White
|
|
93%
|
Zero Dark Thirty (2013)
|
" Kathryn Bigelow takes the procedural model and brushes away every unnecessary detail, leaving behind a heavy, blunt object of a film that is also hugely watchable, engrossing and, best of all... highly suspenseful."
|
Dave White
|
|
90%
|
Beyond The Hills (2013)
|
"...quiet, but also quietly devastating, with detours down the roads of intolerance, mercilessness, cold rejection of outsiders' experiences, mystical and subjective interpretation of "signs," overt woman-on-woman misogyny and brutally strict penance..."
|
Dave White
|
|
32%
|
Gangster Squad (2013)
|
"Do not try to fight off the running "this is the City of Angels" commentary; you will lose. Here, the good guys win, the bad guys earn their comeuppance, the dames look pretty and the dopey dialogue shoves a grapefruit in your face and shuts you up."
|
Dave White
|
|
12%
|
A Haunted House (2013)
|
"I thought coming down with the flu would be the worst thing to happen to me this week. But that was a few days ago when I was still sweating it out in bed and coughing up my lungs... before my immune system was further compromised by A Haunted House."
|
Dave White
|
|
66%
|
Mama (2013)
|
"[Andy Muschietti, Neil Cross, Barbara Muschietti and Guillermo del Toro] have an intuitive understanding of internalized chaos... and, best of all, the pleasures of a really cool, skinny-limbed death-entity living in the closet."
|
Dave White
|
|
60%
|
The Last Stand (2013)
|
"Director Jee-woon Kim (I Saw the Devil) knows how to fill up the screen, surround his megastar with economy-sized murders, car chases, billowing blood-clouds and goofiness."
|
Dave White
|
|
30%
|
Broken City (2013)
|
"Welcome to the broken city... where honorable anti-heroes with dark pasts can get double-crossed and mixed up with good guys who're really bad guys... where doing the right thing will put you IN TOO DEEP. It's a drag to be here."
|
Dave White
|
|
4%
|
Movie 43 (2013)
|
"To fully enjoy yourself from start to finish, it will help if you've got the sense of humor of a middle-school-aged sociopath... For the rest of you, I suggest eventually watching it on your phone."
|
Dave White
|
|
60%
|
John Dies at the End (2013)
|
"I'm not saying this film will make more sense if you're high. But it will make more sense if you're high."
|
Dave White
|
72%
76%
61%
52%
26%
4%
