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Edward Champion

Edward Champion

Agrees with the Tomatometer 73% of the time.

Biography:
As part of a multimillion-dollar laboratory experiment financed through government pork and shady corporate subsidies, the idiosyncratic gestalt entity Edward Champion (referred to lovingly by professionals in the field as Gadzooks Toast VIII) came into being sometime in the mid-1970's. He discovered a variety of things during the ensuing stage of Pavlovian self-awareness: (1) He was fond of images that flickered at 24 frames per second; (2) he was more devoted to coffee and Kit-Kats as a form of cinematic sustenance over popcorn; and (3) he proved exceptionally finicky when it came to certain titles. Accordingly, after stints as a filmmaker, writer, college radio DJ, public access television producer and one-time front man of possibly the worst garage band of all time, he stumbled upon the role of film critic, which he continues to practice when not immersed in other creative endeavors.
Publications:
rec.arts.movies.reviews
Total Reviews:
83
Total QuickRatings:
83

Movie Reviews Only

Showing 1 - 50 of 83
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Rating T-Meter Title | Year Add Date
— 78% My Son the Fanatic (1999) " But I suspect that Om Puri will be lost in the long history of forgotten great performers." — 24 Frames Per Second
Posted Apr 3, 2001
— 38% Mystery, Alaska (1999) " Jay Roach certainly picked a bad script with which to stretch himself beyond film comedy into the realm of the Uplifting Sports Movie." — 24 Frames Per Second
Posted Apr 3, 2001
— 69% My Life so Far (1999) " My Life So Far is a smug movie that, at 93 minutes, feels interminable. It has more asphyxiating helium than a hot air balloon show." — 24 Frames Per Second
Posted Apr 3, 2001
— 12% My Favorite Martian (1999) " I suppose it was inevitable that it would be turned into a vapid feature film." — 24 Frames Per Second
Posted Apr 3, 2001
— 52% The Muse (1999) " It certainly doesn't help that the film deals with a milieu (the movie business) that has been mined to death for material over the past five years. " — 24 Frames Per Second
Posted Apr 3, 2001
— 56% Mumford (1999) " Mumford marks a return of the touchy-feely, sentimental nonsense that has infiltrated Kasdan's latter films like cockroaches invading a low-income housing unit." — 24 Frames Per Second
Posted Apr 3, 2001
— 60% The Minus Man (1999) " Wilson has a quality that can best be described as a disturbing variation on a slightly metaphysical Joe Sixpack." — 24 Frames Per Second
Posted Apr 3, 2001
— 19% Love Stinks (1999) " Pity poor French Stewart, the latest television actor trying to leap into the larger canvas of cinema." — 24 Frames Per Second
Posted Apr 3, 2001
— 83% Le Petit Voleur (The Little Thief) (1999) " a hell of a lot more visceral than being blown out of the waters by a deafening sound mix" — 24 Frames Per Second
Posted Apr 3, 2001
— 93% The Limey (1999) " I suspect Steven Soderbergh is a closet Godard worshipper." — 24 Frames Per Second
Posted Apr 3, 2001
— 84% Last Night (1998) " Any flick that can achieve poignancy with the unlikeliest of musical sources -- in this case, Pete Seger's "Guantanamera" -- has my perpetual admiration." — 24 Frames Per Second
Posted Apr 3, 2001
— 39% Lake Placid (1999) " I don't care how many television awards David E. Kelley has won; the man cannot write a feature film." — 24 Frames Per Second
Posted Apr 3, 2001
— 29% Jakob the Liar (1999) " ...a film that is as honest in its depiction of the Holocaust as Krakatoa is East of Java." — 24 Frames Per Second
Posted Apr 3, 2001
— 86% Seul Contre Tous (I Stand Alone) (One Against All) (1998) " The French can do a lot. But they cannot remake Taxi Driver." — 24 Frames Per Second
Posted Apr 3, 2001
— 73% The Inheritors (1998) " ...an effective movie that deals with some meaty issues for a simple movie telling a simple story" — 24 Frames Per Second
Posted Apr 3, 2001
— 22% In Dreams (1999) " These two talents have put their heads together and come up with such lovely dialogue as "You can call the fucking police and tell them my husband's being eaten by a dog!"" — 24 Frames Per Second
Posted Apr 3, 2001
— 86% An Ideal Husband (1999) " It's another thing to chop up what was admittedly a flawed play, as if Wilde was no more talented than John Grisham or Akvita Goldman. " — 24 Frames Per Second
Posted Apr 3, 2001
— 84% Hands on a Hard Body (1998) " Bindler transcends what could have been a mere cinematic novelty and creates a parable of human endurance and determination. " — 24 Frames Per Second
Posted Apr 3, 2001
— 17% The Haunting (1999) " The Haunting is no more based on Shirley Jackson's notable novella, The Haunting of Hill House, than descended from the 1963 film by Robert Wise." — 24 Frames Per Second
Posted Apr 3, 2001
— 86% Guinevere (1999) " To some degree, Guinevere's poetic realism feels like something Balzac could have created if he had foreseen the invention of the motion picture." — 24 Frames Per Second
Posted Apr 3, 2001
— 92% Go (1999) " Go! is one fine show for a movie that could have been another disposable Tarantino knockoff." — 24 Frames Per Second
Posted Apr 3, 2001
— 43% The Adventures of Sebastian Cole (2000) " Sebastian Cole, however, is a can of tuna gone wrong, to which one can only reply, "Sorry, Charlie."" — 24 Frames Per Second
Posted Apr 3, 2001
— 45% The Acid House (1998) " If you're up for a masochistic film experience, it would be difficult to find worse" — 24 Frames Per Second
Posted Apr 3, 2001
87% The Blair Witch Project (1999) " All that's needed is a voiceover from John Larroquette." — 24 Frames Per Second
Posted Mar 19, 2001
5/10 32% All the Pretty Horses (2000) " The editors have assembled it as if they were attempting to create a soufflĂ© using a Cuisinart." — 24 Frames Per Second
Posted Feb 7, 2001
6/10 56% The Gift (2000) " Raimi fails to deliver a snappy visual worthy of the outlandish angles that hallmarked his early efforts." — 24 Frames Per Second
Posted Feb 7, 2001
13% Book of Shadows - Blair Witch 2 (2000) " Suggests that the words 'A Joe Berlinger Film' should be uttered in the same context as mass murderers, neo-Nazis and born again Christians." — 24 Frames Per Second
Posted Feb 7, 2001
9/10 57% Dr. T & The Women (2000) " Altman has demonstrated that he is a master of tailoring a star's persona to fit within his vision as neatly as a locomotive jetting through a tunnel." — 24 Frames Per Second
Posted Feb 7, 2001
5/10 63% The Broken Hearts Club (2000) " A wooden (though somewhat entertaining) endurance test of a movie." — 24 Frames Per Second
Posted Feb 7, 2001
8/10 95% Best in Show (2000) " Has enough laughs to offset its slow spots." — 24 Frames Per Second
Posted Feb 7, 2001
7/10 88% Exorcist: The Version You've Never Seen (2000) " Friedkin ... could not decide whether The Exorcist was an artistic film that explored the cosmic yin-yang of humanity or simply a two-bit horror film." — 24 Frames Per Second
Posted Feb 7, 2001
3/4 75% Nixon (1995) — rec.arts.movies.reviews
Posted Jan 1, 2000
6/10 19% The Beach (2000) " Too few cinematic bon mots scattered about to give this film even a dubious cult audience." — 24 Frames Per Second
Posted Jan 1, 2000
3.5/4 97% Good Will Hunting (1997) — rec.arts.movies.reviews
Posted Jan 1, 2000
— 88% American Beauty (1999) — 24 Frames Per Second
Posted Jan 1, 2000
— 44% Very Bad Things (1998) — 24 Frames Per Second
Posted Jan 1, 2000
44% Flawless (1999) " A sin for which Schumacher can never be forgiven." — 24 Frames Per Second
Posted Jan 1, 2000
—— Les Bonnes Femmes (The Good Girls) (1960) " Claude Chabrol is the French New Wave director that got away." — 24 Frames Per Second
Posted Jan 1, 2000
47% Detroit Rock City (1999) " Seems just as fascinated with irresponsibility and rampant destruction as the savages who destroyed the Great Library of Alexandria." — 24 Frames Per Second
Posted Jan 1, 2000
77% Eyes Wide Shut (1999) " A Voltairean parable of circumstance disguised as a commercial film." — 24 Frames Per Second
Posted Jan 1, 2000
— 65% Nil by Mouth (1998) — rec.arts.movies.reviews
Posted Jan 1, 2000
8/10 67% Sleepy Hollow (1999) — 24 Frames Per Second
Posted Jan 1, 2000
4/10 41% Agnes Browne (1999) " Ah, aintcha charmin' now, Missie Angelica Houston, getting a bit of that ol' Irish spirit." — 24 Frames Per Second
Posted Jan 1, 2000
1.5/4 39% Fear (1996) — rec.arts.movies.reviews
Posted Jan 1, 2000
3/4 14% Canadian Bacon (1995) — rec.arts.movies.reviews
Posted Jan 1, 2000
6/10 22% The General's Daughter (1999) " The film is weighed down by such ludicrous moments as a major character committing suicide to (yet again) Carl Orff's Carmina Burana." — 24 Frames Per Second
Posted Jan 1, 2000
80% Bowfinger (1999) " Consider the other side of comedy's quick descent into the mire -- top talents compromising their comedic strengths to appeal to the broadest possible audience." — 24 Frames Per Second
Posted Jan 1, 2000
— 76% Amistad (1997) — rec.arts.movies.reviews
Posted Jan 1, 2000
— 43% Mr. Nice Guy (Yat goh hiu yan) (1997) — rec.arts.movies.reviews
Posted Jan 1, 2000
28% Drive Me Crazy (1999) " Four score and ten minutes was the length of the flick." — 24 Frames Per Second
Posted Jan 1, 2000
Showing 1 - 50 of 83
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