|
0/4
|
8%
|
Grind (2003) |
"
Director La Scala can't direct his way out of this can of half-baked beans."
—
Nitrate Online
Posted Aug 30, 2003
|
|
0/5
|
——
|
Solar Crisis (1993) |
—
Nitrate Online
Posted Nov 4, 2002
|
|
0/4
|
1%
|
The Master of Disguise (2002) |
"
The Master of Diguise is this year's first truly stillborn comedy."
—
Nitrate Online
Posted Aug 5, 2002
|
|
0/4
|
11%
|
Kung Pow! Enter the Fist (2002) |
"
...an early favorite on 2002 top ten "worst" lists. I think I laughed. Once. Maybe not."
—
Nitrate Online
Posted Jan 28, 2002
|
|
0/4
|
8%
|
Out Cold (2001) |
"
How appropriate this overcooked turkey opened over the Thanksgiving holiday weekend! And I'm here to give it a basting."
—
Nitrate Online
Posted Dec 3, 2001
|
|
0/4
|
14%
|
Company Man (2001) |
"
A lamentably incompetent spy send up...a lame period comedy stalled in neutral and filled with drop dreadful jokes rejected from Get Smart! and disbarred vaudeville routines."
—
Nitrate Online
Posted Mar 12, 2001
|
|
0/4
|
13%
|
Phantoms (1998) |
"
Phooey!"
—
Nitrate Online
Posted Jan 1, 2000
|
|
0/4
|
9%
|
Species II (1998) |
"
Species II is one sequel that screams...Yuck! It also conjures up...Why? Screenplay be damned. Acting? Throw it out the window."
—
Nitrate Online
Posted Jan 1, 2000
|
|
0/4
|
4%
|
The Mod Squad (1999) |
"
The Mod Squad is: 1. Sexy. 2. Cool. 3. Mod. 4. None of the above. 5. And then some!"
—
Nitrate Online
Posted Jan 1, 2000
|
|
0/4
|
54%
|
What Dreams May Come (1998) |
"
What Dreams May Come? If I were a betting man, I'd say none. Zilch. Nada. Bleech."
—
Nitrate Online
Posted Jan 1, 2000
|
|
0/4
|
32%
|
Disturbing Behavior (1998) |
"
boring and predictable"
—
Nitrate Online
Posted Jan 1, 2000
|
|
0/4
|
15%
|
Idle Hands (1999) |
"
Idle Hands is all thumbs. Ten of 'em, black and blue and bloodied, all pointed down in deference of the Siskel and Ebert rating system. Yuck."
—
Nitrate Online
Posted Jan 1, 2000
|
|
0/4
|
11%
|
Wing Commander (1999) |
"
Scientific fact: the universe is a big vacuum. Scientific corollary: Wing Commander sucks."
—
Nitrate Online
Posted Jan 1, 2000
|
|
0.5/5.5
|
23%
|
Case 39 (2010) |
"
Its time to put the nail in the otherworldly evil child genre until someone comes up with something original. The only thing supernatural about Case 39 is its ungodly presence on this planet."
—
Film Threat
Posted Oct 15, 2010
|
|
.5/5
|
30%
|
Survival of the Dead (2010) |
"
"A man dies, he gets stupid," someone observes in the film. Maybe if a man makes too many films about the dead, the same fate awaits him. Mr. Romero, you are on notice."
—
Film Threat
Posted Oct 15, 2010
|
|
.5/5
|
1%
|
Alone in the Dark (2005) |
"
horrific and horrible"
—
Film Threat
Posted Jan 29, 2005
|
|
.5/5
|
9%
|
White Noise (2005) |
"
If you're alive, please avoid White Noise. The dead will never forgive you for wasting your time, money, and psychic energy on it."
—
Film Threat
Posted Jan 8, 2005
|
|
.5/5
|
4%
|
Darkness (2004) |
"
Simply put: Darkness fails. It's about as chilling as an unplugged refrigerator."
—
Film Threat
Posted Jan 1, 2005
|
|
0.5/4
|
1%
|
Twisted (2004) |
"
San Francisco still belongs to 'Dirty' Harry Callahan. Twisted, this town ain't big enough for the two of you. Scram!"
—
Nitrate Online
Posted Mar 9, 2004
|
|
.5/4
|
10%
|
Dumb and Dumberer: When Harry Met Lloyd (2003) |
"
It's the dumberest movie I've ever seen!"
—
Nitrate Online
Posted Jun 25, 2003
|
|
.5/4
|
77%
|
Tape (2001) |
"
"Would you guys just figure out what the fuck you're talking about?" Actual line from the film. Actual way you might feel by the time that line is uttered."
—
Nitrate Online
Posted Nov 26, 2001
|
|
0.5/4
|
31%
|
Wet Hot American Summer (2001) |
"
I strongly suggest forgoing Wet Hot American Summer. That scent of sex in the air? It's one limp, cold American odor."
—
Nitrate Online
Posted Sep 8, 2001
|
|
0.5/4
|
14%
|
Driven (2001) |
"
Red flags (not checkered) abound in the banal script, silly dialogue, and the age-defying stretch marks on the face of Burt Reynold."
—
Nitrate Online
Posted May 17, 2001
|
|
0.5/4
|
13%
|
Town & Country (2000) |
"
This romantic dud is the kind of fowl weather friend everyone will want to pluck. As an affair or two or more to remember, Town & Country is better off Lost & Forgotten."
—
Nitrate Online
Posted May 4, 2001
|
|
0.5/4
|
10%
|
Supernova (2000) |
"
...a flatulent space bomb. There may not be air in outer space, but you can smell this one a galaxy away."
—
Nitrate Online
Posted Jan 1, 2000
|
|
0.5/4
|
51%
|
Meet Joe Black (1998) |
"
Brestian (adj.) Bloated, boring, and long-winded, as in "Meet Joe Black is Brestian in scope and to be avoided if you have a weak bladder.""
—
Nitrate Online
Posted Jan 1, 2000
|
|
.5/4
|
16%
|
Beautiful (2000) |
"
Beautiful ain't. Sally Field may be proclaiming "You like me! You really like me!" behind the camera, but don't be egged on."
—
Nitrate Online
Posted Jan 1, 2000
|
|
0.5/4
|
9%
|
The Postman (1997) |
"
The year is 2013. There is no order. There is no peace. Return to sender. Audience unknown."
—
Nitrate Online
Posted Jan 1, 2000
|
|
0.5/4
|
21%
|
A Dog of Flanders (1999) |
"
Step into the darkened theater and the familiar smell may not hit you immediately. Watch your step, though, because A Dog of Flanders is nothing but cinematic doggy poo."
—
Nitrate Online
Posted Jan 1, 2000
|
|
0.5/4
|
11%
|
Black Dog (1998) |
"
Hey, you like 18-wheelers (Have you driven a big Ford lately?), country-and-western music, and an All-American meal (as in meat loaf), then here's a film for you."
—
Nitrate Online
Posted Jan 1, 2000
|
|
0.5/4
|
14%
|
Pokemon the First Movie - Mewtwo vs. Mew (1999) |
"
I'm about forty years too old to take this movie seriously. Or even understand it."
—
Nitrate Online
Posted Jan 1, 2000
|
|
0.5/4
|
17%
|
Mercury Rising (1998) |
"
It doesn't work ... at all. Call it Witless or call it Die Hardly."
—
Nitrate Online
Posted Jan 1, 2000
|
|
0.5/4
|
23%
|
I'll Be Home for Christmas (1998) |
"
Family fare. Pure, sweet, and PG-rated."
—
Nitrate Online
Posted Jan 1, 2000
|
|
0.5/4
|
3%
|
Bless the Child (2000) |
"
There's an old saying: Bless the Child, spare the Audience. And you'd wished the producers thought about this before spending millions on this lame turkey."
—
Nitrate Online
Posted Jan 1, 2000
|
|
0.5/4
|
16%
|
The Avengers (1998) |
"
Scenes evaporate before your very eyes. Bad puns roll off the heroes and anti-hero's tongues and lay dead before your feet."
—
Nitrate Online
Posted Jan 1, 2000
|
|
0.5/4
|
47%
|
Deep Impact (1998) |
"
For all the money ($80 million) spent on this early mid-year entry, all you, the viewer, get is Dull Impact."
—
Nitrate Online
Posted Jan 1, 2000
|
|
0.5/4
|
30%
|
Deep Rising (1998) |
"
The South China Sea's answer to the Bermuda Triangle, but off-the-shelf acting and a hackneyed plot won't keep this oversized barge afloat."
—
Nitrate Online
Posted Jan 1, 2000
|
|
0.5/4
|
7%
|
Jawbreaker (1999) |
"
I'd rather suffer root canal that burden myself with another viewing of Jawbreaker, or as I call it: Battle of the High School Bimbo Bitches. Class dismissed!"
—
Nitrate Online
Posted Jan 1, 2000
|
|
0.5/4
|
11%
|
End of Days (1999) |
"
Ahnuld's latest action dud is one huge Millennium bug bomb, a sad, pyrotechnic rehashing of yet another The-Devil-Takes-a-Bride concept..."
—
Nitrate Online
Posted Jan 1, 2000
|
|
0.5/4
|
50%
|
Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas (1998) |
"
This big-screen adaptation of the 1971 cult classic is a sure candidate for many worst ten film lists."
—
Nitrate Online
Posted Jan 1, 2000
|
|
1/5
|
16%
|
Priest (2011) |
"
If you've watched any of the trailers, they make about as much sense as the full feature does."
—
Film Threat
Posted May 15, 2011
|
|
1/5
|
20%
|
Beastly (2011) |
"
I'm a half-century too old for such tween swill as that which is regurgitated in CBS Films' Beastly," another in the ever-expanding clones of Twilight wannabes..."
—
Film Threat
Posted Mar 3, 2011
|
|
1/5
|
30%
|
Sanctum (2011) |
"
James Cameron may be the king of the cinematic world, but plastering his name all over the trailers and posters promoting this film doesn't change one obvious thing about it: It stinks."
—
Film Threat
Posted Feb 4, 2011
|
|
1/5
|
18%
|
Princess Ka'iulani (2010) |
"
Looking more like a Hallmark Movie-of-the-Week and reading like a CliffNotes summary of the overthrow of the Kingdom of Hawaii in the 1890s, the $9-million historical romance Princess Kaiulani won't raise any eyebrows or ruffle feathers..."
—
Film Threat
Posted Oct 15, 2010
|
|
1/5
|
35%
|
Lottery Ticket (2010) |
"
If given the opportunity to see Lottery Ticket again (once was enough!), I'd break down... and buy some lottery tickets instead."
—
Film Threat
Posted Oct 15, 2010
|
|
1/5
|
7%
|
Whiteout (2009) |
"
Whiteout is a colorless wasteland. There's only one thing that could have helped cover this film up: A flashback that changed the script's name to Wite-Out."
—
Film Threat
Posted Oct 23, 2009
|
|
1/5
|
80%
|
Fame (1980) |
"
Sadly, everything is predictable, which is to the detriment of the mostly fine, young talent that appears in this ineffective retread. I hope that their fame, unlike this film, isn't fleeting."
—
Film Threat
Posted Oct 23, 2009
|
|
1/5
|
25%
|
Fame (2009) |
"
Everything is predictable, which is to the detriment of the mostly fine, young talent that appears in this ineffective retread."
—
Film Threat
Posted Oct 22, 2009
|
|
1/5
|
13%
|
Hide and Seek (2005) |
"
[Director John] Polson offers up a few chilling scares, but the underwritten screenplay really does show off [Hide and Seek's] weaknesses."
—
Film Threat
Posted Jan 30, 2005
|
|
1/5
|
13%
|
Oscar (1991) |
—
Nitrate Online
Posted Jan 4, 2004
|