Joe Neumaier

Joe Neumaier

Agrees with the Tomatometer 73% of the time.

Biography:
New York Daily News film critic.
Publications:
New York Daily News
Total Reviews:
842
Total QuickRatings:
842

Movie Reviews Only

Showing 1 - 50 of 842
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Rating T-Meter Title | Year Add Date
2/5 0% Once Upon a Time in Brooklyn (2013) " Cathy Moriarty and other Scorsese alums pop up, but these mean streets feel too derivative to thrill." — New York Daily News
Posted May 2, 2013
1/5 18% 1st Night (2013) " The movie may appeal to theater aficionados and Juilliard undergrads, but to the average moviegoer, it's a trudge." — New York Daily News
Posted May 2, 2013
2/5 0% Generation Um... (2013) " "Um" winds up as empty as its mean streets are phony." — New York Daily News
Posted May 2, 2013
4/5 67% The Iceman (2013) " Michael Shannon moves through "The Iceman" like a shark." — New York Daily News
Posted May 2, 2013
4/5 78% Iron Man 3 (2013) " It sharply fuses the humor and heart of the earlier films with a satisfyingly heavy-metal strength - and a darkness that's more than earned." — New York Daily News
Posted May 2, 2013
3/5 46% Pain & Gain (2013) " Wahlberg and Johnson are the saving graces of an in-your-face movie about weightlifters who kidnap, extort and dismember their victims." — New York Daily News
Posted Apr 25, 2013
1/5 8% The Big Wedding (2013) " Movie-family weddings are like real ones. Some faces are welcome, some you dread and others have had work done. But they all get tiresome quickly." — New York Daily News
Posted Apr 25, 2013
3/5 79% An Oversimplification Of Her Beauty (2013) " This musical, elliptical, personal, poetical, sensual indie produced by Jay-Z has a seductive DIY feel and a lineage that's part early Spike Lee and late Charles Bukowski." — New York Daily News
Posted Apr 25, 2013
4/5 76% Kon Tiki (2013) " The top-notch adventure tale "Kon-Tiki" is an old-fashioned entertainment, complete with a lead who physically recalls Peter O'Toole in "Lawrence of Arabia."" — New York Daily News
Posted Apr 25, 2013
3/5 47% The Lords of Salem (2013) " Atmosphere is three-fourths of the game in a horror film, and "The Lords of Salem" has it in spades." — New York Daily News
Posted Apr 18, 2013
2/5 56% Oblivion (2013) " As its palpable sense of dread -- well-sustained in a gently cascading first hour -- gives way to dead ends, this Omega Movie shoots itself in the foot." — New York Daily News
Posted Apr 17, 2013
1/5 4% Scary Movie 5 (2013) " Like so much of this whole series, the mere mention of a familiar pop culture figure or title is supposed to be hilarious." — New York Daily News
Posted Apr 12, 2013
2/5 42% To The Wonder (2013) " It feels like a high-end perfume ad." — New York Daily News
Posted Apr 11, 2013
2/5 60% American Meat (2013) " The problem is that this rah-rah chronicle never addresses the dangerous, distressing disparity between non-organic farms, which are still the norm, and the ones focused on here." — New York Daily News
Posted Apr 11, 2013
5/5 77% 42 (2013) " It's a sports film nonsports fans can love; it's a family film that never preaches; it's a biopic that also takes in the world and people around its subject." — New York Daily News
Posted Apr 11, 2013
1/5 74% Simon Killer (2013) " Sort of "An American Psycho's European Vacation," this indie dramatic thriller mixes sex and violence and still winds up dull." — New York Daily News
Posted Apr 4, 2013
3/5 87% Upstream Color (2013) " "Upstream Color" is weird, but it's worth the time." — New York Daily News
Posted Apr 4, 2013
4/5 68% Trance (2013) " A frisky, feisty heist flick with brains and charisma, the movie may make a few errors, but they're forgotten in the blink of an eye thanks to all the twists, turns and close shaves." — New York Daily News
Posted Apr 4, 2013
3/5 81% The Place Beyond The Pines (2013) " This emotionally ambitious mess has faults to spare, but there's also something fuzzily honest about it." — New York Daily News
Posted Mar 28, 2013
2/5 28% G.I. Joe: Retaliation (2013) " The G.I. Joe team is back, and most of their sophomore movie adventure, G.I. Joe Retaliation, is as bland as their name and as subtle as an exploding tank." — New York Daily News
Posted Mar 27, 2013
1/5 13% Love And Honor (2013) " Hemsworth has presence, but he also represents this film's biggest problem: It feels like a bunch of good-looking kids putting on a show." — New York Daily News
Posted Mar 21, 2013
2/5 65% Starbuck (2013) " A high-concept goof that's hard-pressed to surmount its twee preposterousness." — New York Daily News
Posted Mar 21, 2013
1/5 43% Admission (2013) " This thin envelope of a comedy checks all the boxes for being a phoned-in, phony, padded rom-com." — New York Daily News
Posted Mar 21, 2013
1/5 8% K-11 (2013) " Points for niche audaciousness, but that's all." — New York Daily News
Posted Mar 14, 2013
3/5 81% From Up On Poppy Hill (2013) " Even with no wood sprites, witches or spells, there's plenty of magic in this coming-of-age charmer." — New York Daily News
Posted Mar 14, 2013
2/5 71% My Amityville Horror (2013) " [Feels] like an episode of "In Search Of" on steroids." — New York Daily News
Posted Mar 14, 2013
1/5 10% If I Were You (2012) " Bloody awful." — New York Daily News
Posted Mar 14, 2013
3/5 66% Spring Breakers (2013) " Korine manages to make much of the film into a "Natural Born Killers"-style pop patchwork with a videogame-influenced lack of morality." — New York Daily News
Posted Mar 14, 2013
3/5 31% Language of a Broken Heart (2013) " Nothing terribly special here, but perfectly played and a spiritual cousin to such early '90s indies as "Naked in New York" and "Ed's Next Move."" — New York Daily News
Posted Mar 7, 2013
4/5 90% Beyond The Hills (2013) " The deliberate pace Mungiu employs in this incredible work is so engrossing and quietly heartbreaking that its philosophical ending may come as a shock." — New York Daily News
Posted Mar 7, 2013
2/5 31% Emperor (2013) " A methodical but dull fact-based drama set just after World War II." — New York Daily News
Posted Mar 7, 2013
3/5 36% Dead Man Down (2013) " Before it devolves into typical American-style action, there's an intriguing, European-style complexity to Dead Man Down." — New York Daily News
Posted Mar 7, 2013
2/5 13% The Last Exorcism Part II (2013) " Now Bell can break out of the genre. She's served her time." — New York Daily News
Posted Mar 1, 2013
2/5 47% The Sweeney (2013) " Based on a '70s British program, this is a bombastic effort that, while not successful, is still as bracing as a cold pint." — New York Daily News
Posted Mar 1, 2013
3/5 86% Welcome To Pine Hill (2013) " Writer-director Keith Miller's existential tone and Harper's gentle approach and giant soul turn this New York story with a final twist into something special." — New York Daily News
Posted Mar 1, 2013
3/5 96% War Witch (2013) " This intense, gripping drama is utterly transporting." — New York Daily News
Posted Mar 1, 2013
5/5 89% A Place at the Table (2013) " As important and eye-opening a documentary as you'll see this year, "A Place at the Table" makes it impossible to think of hunger as merely another symptom of a shredded social safety net." — New York Daily News
Posted Feb 28, 2013
2/5 67% Stoker (2013) " Full of heavingly gorgeous images that envelop a viewer before smothering them, its maddening elements eventually become too much to bear." — New York Daily News
Posted Feb 28, 2013
2/5 60% Rubberneck (2013) " The film works better as an uncomfortable character drama than as a murky family mystery, which Karpovsky deepens with some psychobabble. Still, a nicely sinister and shuddersome effort." — New York Daily News
Posted Feb 21, 2013
3/5 78% Red Flag (2013) " Owing a debt to Albert Brooks' early comedies, "Red Flag" might be too much if it weren't just right." — New York Daily News
Posted Feb 21, 2013
1/5 19% Inescapable (2013) " Muddled and inert despite the best intentions, this inescapably dull thriller plays like a Middle Eastern take on Liam Neeson's "Taken."" — New York Daily News
Posted Feb 21, 2013
2/5 58% Snitch (2013) " Half crime thriller, half family drama, with a bit of legal and behind-prison-walls suspense thrown in, "Snitch" is like watching an elephant on ice: inelegant, but you admire the effort." — New York Daily News
Posted Feb 21, 2013
1/5 27% Saving Lincoln (2013) " Comes off like a View-Master version of a tale already told." — New York Daily News
Posted Feb 14, 2013
2/5 65% The Jeffrey Dahmer Files (2013) " [It feels] like a late-night cable-news hack job." — New York Daily News
Posted Feb 14, 2013
2/5 92% No (2013) " The story of it, while true to the moment, needed - ironically - much more dynamism." — New York Daily News
Posted Feb 14, 2013
1/5 15% A Good Day To Die Hard (2013) " This leaden flick is completely joyless." — New York Daily News
Posted Feb 13, 2013
2/5 64% Ferlinghetti A Rebirth of Wonder (2013) " Sadly, the film gets mired in traditionalism, something the man himself always railed against." — New York Daily News
Posted Feb 7, 2013
1/5 56% Would You Rather (2013) " With a bit less grisliness, it could have been a mystery dinner-theater performance." — New York Daily News
Posted Feb 7, 2013
3/5 92% Lore (2013) " A disconcerting and eerie film, made even more memorable since it's seen through the prism of childhood's end." — New York Daily News
Posted Feb 7, 2013
4/5 85% Side Effects (2013) " The movie respects a viewer's intelligence, which should also serve as a warning; don't be lulled into a stupor. Keeping sharp will allow all the fun and menace in this terrific thriller to seep into your head." — New York Daily News
Posted Feb 7, 2013
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