Alone in the Dark (2005)
Critic Consensus: Inept on almost every level, Alone in the Dark may not work as a thriller, but it's good for some head-slapping, incredulous laughter.
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as Edward Carnby
as Aline Cedrac
as Commander Richards
as Professor Hudgens
as Agent Miles
as Captain Chernick
as Sister Clara
as '80s Sheriff
as '80s Sheriff
as Deputy Adams
as Young Edward
as Agent Yoneck
as Crewman Barnes
as Beat Cop
as Agent Barr
as Agent Marko
as Delivery Guy
as Agent Cheung
as Agent Turner
as Professor Hudgens
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Critic Reviews for Alone in the Dark
Christian Slater and Stephen Dorff, the reigning princes of Hollywood schlock, join forces in this brain-dead adaptation of a popular video game.
Any chance for suspense is thwarted by gratuitous violence, heavy-metal-propelled action sequences and laughably flat dialogue between characters who are barely more developed than in the Atari version.
Lame monster movies like this adaptation of the popular Atari video game are scary for all the wrong reasons.
The late Gene Siskel once devised a simple method of measuring a film's worth: 'Is this film more interesting than a documentary of the same actors having lunch?' 'Alone in the Dark' doesn't come close to matching that standard.
Audience Reviews for Alone in the Dark
Alone in the Dark is Uwe Boll's worst, if that's even possible. Alone in the Dark is very bad, with bad acting, story and directing. The film stumbles around trying to find a purpose, but it never elevates to anything remotely good or creative. Action scenes are sloppy, too noisy and not well done. Equally bad is Tara Reid. This is a film that fails to hit the mark on so many levels, it's not even possible to salvage even if you'd remove all the crap scenes with Tara Reid. Alone in the Dark is a misguided attempt at creating an action Horror film, and it fails. This is one film that just doesn't deliver. You end up wondering why this film wasf8inanced in the first place and you're astounded at how Boll could pull something like this off. Alone in the Dark is the prime example as to why Video game to screen adaptations are horrible ideas for films, and they rarely work. Alone in the Dark is a poorly made film and you realize that Uwe Boll doesn't care about directing a good film that he's only in the business for the money. His films sell, so there's no reason for him to direct a good film, although he's managed to make three good flick s out of the fifteen or so he's made. This might have been an interesting idea for a film if it would have been handled properly. There were signs of potential, but it quickly became apparent that it was a pure joke fest. Everything that might have been interesting is wasted from the poorly conceived script, which feels rushed, with no heart put into its story to the washed up actors; this film was set to fail right before the cameras were set to roll. Avoid this horror flick, as it a mess from start to finish, and there's nothing good to come out of it aside from the heavy metal soundtrack.
This is really bad, nothing like the games at all. Has some well known faces and the opening 10mins are pretty good with some cool SFX. After that though it becomes an Aliens rip off that is no where near as good!
Alone in the Dark Quotes
|Edward Carnby:||My name is Edward Carnby, and I'm here to protect you from the things you don't believe.|
|Aline Cedrac:||[slaps Edward] I thought you were dead, *sshole!|
|Aline Cedrac:||Some doors are meant to stay shut.|
|Aline Cedrac:||[points to Native American text on a cave wall] It's a warning! It says, 'Once you make it down here alive, you're already dead.'|
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