The Calcium Kid - Movie Reviews - Rotten Tomatoes

The Calcium Kid Reviews

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½ October 19, 2013
A very funny mockumentary with Orlando Bloom (he's so young I wouldnt doubt if it were actually made years earlier). A guy working out in a gym gets picked to be a sparring partner for the champion, said champion breaks his hand on guy's head days before big bout. Guy is now in big bout. Thats basically the set-up for this story that follows this unlikely boxer for a week as he prepares for the big international belt fight. A mockumentary done RIGHT!
½ November 18, 2011
a funny "mockumentary" that keeps you chuckling all the way through; that is, if you don't take it too seriously!
½ March 4, 2009
Pretty decent little flick's a mockumentary that follows a milk man/amateur boxer that got thrown into a heavyweight fight. The movie was actually quite funny and actually pretty good. Orlando Bloom was alright in it...I could tolerate him anyways. A movie many should check out and give a chance.
½ November 15, 2008
It was okay. Not Orlando's best performance. Omid Djalili was good. Not a movie I need to see ever again.
September 3, 2007
I haven't even seen the whole thing and yet I completely love it! Flipping through the channels one morning, I stopped when I saw Orli on Comedy Central. And I'm glad I did! It is so amazingly funny!
½ November 3, 2007
A silly movie but good. It amused and entertained me through out. Orlando was adorable so that helps. :)
June 10, 2007
Very little known gem. Fantastic Orlando Bloom performance and possibly my favorite Omid Djailli role.
May 16, 2007
I think Orlando should do more comedy. I was laughing my you know what off. He was so naive and sweet. The supporting cast was really good too.
January 22, 2007
i sawt his it was petty good. i like movies nobody eses. the guy is a boxer. he has probles. its like a mockumentary u see it like its true. i like a lot of ppl who r not important. ull remembre the neigbhor!! i will watch it again.
½ October 4, 2006
I saw it on the tv so it had poor quality ... all of the scenes were cut up but it was a 'documentary'..bloom fans should not see it... just don't
October 6, 2013
It starts as a bad movie then goes downhill for a wee while. Eventually it gets its act together because of the acting standard of Orlando. Supporting cast start popping up and this movie eventually becomes a well organized silliness. The photography is of the steady cam style, it is just unfortunate that it shakes a lot. Nibbles: Full Cream Guernsey Milk.
½ February 20, 2012
Orlando Bloom's movies have made over 240 million pounds combined. This films makes you wonder how he gets cast. One of the worst brit flicks ever committed to cinema.
September 30, 2011
An excellent movie, a good laugh. Worth a watch
July 20, 2011
A Fun Film To Pass The Time, Nothing Special, But It Does Provide The Laughs It Promises. In My Opinion Didn't Like The Ending.
½ May 30, 2011
An average mockumentary.
May 27, 2011
This was actually pretty funny, I liked it at the time, dunno about now though.
½ December 11, 2009
Completely weak. That is what you get with a lead actor like Orlando.
I only watched this because of Orlando, but he isn't funny and really isn't an actor - so got what I paid for.
Couldn't get through the whole thing - returned it 1 hour later saying it was the wrong one. Wasn't even worth the free viewing.
½ June 7, 2005
Basically a spoof of the Rocky films.

Amusing in parts.
½ September 7, 2004
Apolagies, apolagies. I haven't written for soooo long. I've had friends over and I've been on the new forum Cass made. Oh and Saturday night I stayed up until 6am looking at all the Venice Film Festival pictures :D The birds were chirping, I thought it best to turn in. Now I am veeeeery tired, but not really. Weird...I go in and out of phases.

So Saturday...what did I do? Hmm...I remember giggling alot. Oh yes! We ended up in Woolworths looking for Arizona Dream (I'd just bought it, but I saw it for 1 cheaper on the internet at Woolies) and we discovered the MOTHER of freebies. KINDER CHOCOLATE - ALL FREE!!! These little mini Buenos and Kinder Maxi's in a box with a not saying "[i]Please take[/i]" - giving no specification of how many. So we went 4 times and got 4 big fistfulls each time. :D Looooads of chocolate for me!! Hopefully they'll make this freebie thing a regular occurance.

Claire then came over on Sunday night so I could watch THE CALCIUM KID (!!!) - the Orlando Bloom film that was made years ago and only just made it onto DVD. It was HILARIOUS, and I think it was meant to be!! We then watched Arizona Dream - weird, yet wonderful film. Don't quite understand some bits yet so I'm gonna watch it again.

Then on Monday we did nothing but watch TV...kinda boring, but alright I guess. We then attempted to watch Black Hawk Down but it is the dullest film ever. I think it's just too masculine for me to enjoy, even with Eric Bana in.

And today I had to go do my research for my Geography Coursework with Claire. Which involved me standing in Studley for 2 hours counting the cars. And bloody hell that village is congested! Proves my theory though :D

We then just wandered around Studley for like 4 is reallt boring, there is nowt to do and I didn't wanna go in any of the pubs because we'd already nearly been stopped by the Police as my school is the last to go back and they thought I was skipping it. Which I wasn't, I was doing it! That was alright, we had a laugh - or rather, Claire got herself a new laugh which was absolutely hilarious.

So yeah, the not so thrilling life of me over the past 3 days. Tomorrow I will work my arse off to try and get as much coursework done before school starts (oh and have a mass-pampering session so that I look my best for Thursday - I'm vain, too vain!) Go to be early (what?! Noooo!!) and then get up early still to go to that dirty building(s) called school. The new Sixth Formers better be fit...
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