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Disaster Movie Reviews

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TheDudeLebowski65
TheDudeLebowski65

Super Reviewer

August 19, 2011
Aptly titled film, this is an awful mess from start to finish that isn't funny whatsoever. The jokes are awful, stale, and above all stupid. To me, it's shocking to see these two hacks making garbage, as they have no talent whatsoever in making enjoyable films for an audience. If you're expecting something funny, you won't find it here, this is a pointless film, with no care at trying to make genuinely funny jokes, instead opting for the lazy, gross out humor as pop culture reference that these two talentless filmmakers seem to enjoy so much. I hope one day that they'll stop making films, they should not be allowed near a camera. To me, these two are the worst filmmakers alive. At least on occasion, Uwe Boll has made decent flicks, but man Friedberg and Seltzer are far worse in my book, but that's my opinion. Their filmography is pure garbage, with nothing that stands out At least Boll, made Rampage, Seed, and Assault on Wall Street all interesting in their way, but these guys simply are beyond awful and they should just give up at making "films". Disaster Movie is not interesting, entertaining, funny or memorable. This is one of those films that you want to forget and you ask yourself why you watched this. This film scraps the bottom of the barrel of bad ideas, and nothing gels together, and everything falls flat into a big train wreck, or should I say disaster? Avoid this film at all costs; it's not worth the celluloid it's filmed on. Disaster Movie ranks as one of the worst films I've ever seen, and it's an exercise in bad filmmaking. Like I said, these two make Uwe Boll look good.
boxman
boxman

Super Reviewer

August 30, 2008
Writers/directors Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer couldn't leave well enough alone. I had become accustomed to these two talentless hacks tainting the beginning of a new year with their deeply unfunny "spoof" movies. In February 2006, they released Date Movie, in January 2007, they released Epic Movie, and in January 2008, they released Meet the Spartans; all abysmal comedies that prove how absolutely clueless Friedberg and Seltzer are as writers. But one cinematic blight wasn't enough for these two jackasses and so, on the third anniversary of Hurricane Katrina striking the Gulf Coast, these sultans of suck have unleashed the appropriately titled Disaster Movie.

I won't even dignify this movie with a plot synopsis. To do so would acknowledge there was at any point a script.

By pacing their horrible abortions of comedy a year apart, Friedberg and Seltzer at least have time to gauge what movies have become popular and what pop culture events have stuck in the public consciousness. But Disaster Movie was put on the fast track and was in production before many of the movies it deems worthy of attack were even released. As a result, it seems that the fail twins were watching trailers for upcoming movies and hedging their bets on what would be popular. This explains why they mention movies that made no cultural impact and flopped at the box-office, like Speed Racer and The Love Guru. Seriously, a "funny" reference to a bad Mike Myers movie months after it has opened and closed is, in itself, kind of humorous in how ridiculous and embarrassing this all is. Once again, Friedberg and Seltzer have assembled a highly disposable pop-culture yearbook except this time they took bets on what would be meaningful. Is anyone going to even get a reference to Jumper? How about in a few more months? Yet again Friedberg and Seltzer have assembled a movie that has a built-in expiration date.

As expected, Friedberg and Seltzer apply their shallow level of comedy to the movies caught in their crosshairs. These guys simply don't understand the difference between reference and parody, and once again they deluge an audience with cheap references to other movies and the reference is designed to be the joke. Just having a character appear as the Hulk isn't funny. Having a character appear as the Amy Adams character from Enchanted isn't funny. Friedberg and Seltzer don't even mock the disaster movies befitting its title, like The Towering Inferno, The Poseidon Adventure, or the more recent Day After Tomorrow. The only partially relevant movie they make reference to is Twister because it affords them the opportunity to drop cows on characters (if it's not funny once it's not funny the thousandth time). Disaster Movie cycles through a mix of movies from the fall of 2007 to last summer, including Juno, 10,000 B.C. (a film worthy of parody by smarter people), No Country for Old Men, Sex and the City, Superbad, Beowulf, Wanted, Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, Prince Caspian (another movie that faded quickly), and others. Friedberg and Seltzer mix in attacks on pop culture figures like Jessica Simpson and Amy Winehouse, simplifying each to a one-joke premise (Amy Winehouse is drunk, never heard that one before). But wait; to prove how in touch they are, Friedberg and Seltzer have used their SECOND SPOOF MOVIE OF THIS YEAR to include jokes about Michael Jackson being a pedophile. Oh my good graces, how do these guys come up with such cutting-edge and timely material in the year 2008?

You want to know how truly terrible Friedberg and Seltzer are as filmmakers? Disaster Movie is the (non-sex) film debut of socialite and tabloid queen Kim Kardashian. This woman is known for one thing and that thing is her thang, namely her colossally round posterior. She has officially taken the booty torch from Jennifer Lopez. Friedberg and Seltzer fail to make even a single joke about Kardashian's notable assets. Not only that, from a pure exploitation angle, they even fail to take advantage of Kardashian as a sex object. These two nimrods hired a woman who is only known for her anatomy and they do nothing. A wrestling match between Kardashian and Carmen Electra sounds like it might be pleasing to the eyes but Friedberg and Seltzer find a way to even screw this up. Their level of failure in every aspect of filmmaking is stunning.

To honor Friedberg and Seltzer recycling the same garbage and calling it by a different name, I will stop writing about their newest example of cinematic ineptitude and simply copy and paste sections of my review for this year's Meet the Spartans. Enjoy my attempt at Mad Libs style film criticism. These two clowns don't even deserve the added effort.

"Writer/directors Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer are, and I do not say this lightly, the worst filmmakers of all time. They are the definition of the term hacks. If there were a revolution, a violent overthrow by angry fans of good cinema, these two jackasses would be the first two against the wall. They are worse than Ed Wood, they are worse than Uwe Boll, they are worse than Harold P. Warren, who wrote and directed the worst movie of all time, Manos: The Hands of Fate, because of a bet that he couldn't make a movie (I'm fairly certain he still lost). Friedberg and Seltzer are the antithesis to funny. They mock funny, they spit at funny, they gang rape the notion of funny. [DISASTER MOVIE] is their [FOURTH] spoof in three years, or, as I see it, their [FOURTH] miscarriage of comedy.

[DISASTER MOVIE] would be hard-pressed to fit the definition of a movie, no matter how generous you are with the term. True, it is a collection of moving pictures, but surely we must have greater stipulations for our movie going entertainment. The actual flick is only [75] minutes long, barely a little over an hour, and then it's crammed with 15 minutes of outtakes and needless extra scenes to be strewn over the credits [INCLUDING AN ALREADY PAINFULLY DATED PARODY OF SARAH SILVERMAN'S SONG "I'M F***ING MATT DMAON," ALTERED TO PG-13 FRIENDLY LYRICS ABOUT "DATING" MATT DAMON]. I should be more upset by the total transparent laziness to even construct a film of suitable length, but every minute I was spared more of this junk was an act of divine mercy.

Friedberg and Seltzer are not filmmakers but regurgiatators, wildly lampooning anything that they feel approaches their young teen male demographic. [DISASTER MOVIE], like Epic Movie and Date Movie, cannot be classified as a "spoof" because all the film is doing is setting up references and the references are supposed to be the joke. The film is like a meaningless and random scrapbook for the year in pop culture; the film's only function to pacify total idiots with attention-deprivation issues. If this is someone's idea of comedy in the 21st century, then I will slit my wrists now.

And yet, astoundingly, the movie still feels like it needs to set up its dumb, obvious gags. The film has one [PERSON] point off screen and say, "Look, it's [HANNAH MONTANA]," and then we cut to [HANNAH MONTANA CRUSHED BY A ROCK]. Why did Friedberg and Seltzer feel the need to name check? It happens again when [A CHARACTER POINTS AND SAYS, "HEY, IT'S ALVIN AND THE CHIPMUNKS"]. I don't need a handicap for non-obscure pop culture bon mots.

From a production standpoint, this movie sucks. It looks really cheap. The sets and costumes and props look horrible, like something a high school production would ditch. Just because it reuses the same camera setups as [ANY MOVIE] doesn't mean it gets any closer to parody. For God's sake, they couldn't even come up with puns on character names.

The actors all seem mildly embarrassed and they do nothing with their roles. It's not their fault the material sucks so deeply, however, it is Electra's fault for appearing in her [FOURTH!] straight Friedberg-Seltzer spoof fest. The key to a good spoof is to play the damn thing straight. It's annoying and redundant if the film keeps winking back at the audience.

[DISASTER MOVIE] is pop culture vomit. No, this is worse, this is cinematic diarrhea. It's watery pop culture discharge masquerading as entertainment. This movie if offensive to anyone that appreciates laughter. This film and its ilk are offensive to mankind. And plus, it's just not funny people, not in the slightest. There's no wit here, no comedic payoffs, no running gags (besides gay jokes [AND COWS FALLING ON PEOPLE, HE HE HE]), no thought or upheaval of convention; instead, this movie is a lazy, cheap catalogue of pop culture events. Even at [90] minutes (really it's [75]) this thing drags and feels exhausted long before it bows out. Just as I said in my review of Epic Movie, Friedberg and Seltzer must be stopped at all costs if comedy is to survive."[/I]

Nate's Grade: F
Sophie B

Super Reviewer

November 2, 2012
Some slightly funny moments, but mostly because it's so stupid but they think it's brilliant. It's better to laugh at how rubbish it is than complain.
3niR
3niR

Super Reviewer

November 12, 2011
I did laughed... maybe once? I think the bloopers at the end is funnier than the movie.
Phil H

Super Reviewer

September 9, 2008
Is it possible that this is worse than 'Meet the Spartans'?? I think it could be. Probably the worst spoof in the series and ever frankly, its just shit from start to finish, nonsense, and not funny.
Only 1 point cos you have to give it something on here and the reasonably amusing 'Sex in the City' rip plus the 'Carrie' rip was actually pretty good.
Christopher H

Super Reviewer

July 23, 2011
An absolute disaster in comedy writing. This movie is un-watchable.
murphmann93
murphmann93

Super Reviewer

June 24, 2011
It was a disaster!
Sajin P

Super Reviewer

May 21, 2011
The kind of movie that you check out against your better judgement, just to see how horrible it can be.
Dean !

Super Reviewer

September 4, 2008
Yes this a really bad film and a bad spoof. Apart from Twister it only really spoofs other films out that year and not disaster films which was odd? From the same director as the nearly as bad date movie! Stick to scary movie, naked gun and Airplane for decent spoof films!
DreamExtractor
DreamExtractor

Super Reviewer

March 16, 2011
Dumbest spoof movie ever next to Meet the Spartans
Matt G

Super Reviewer

February 12, 2011
They got the title right, I'll tell you that. This movie was a full-blown disaster. I didn't want to see this, but my friends said it would be good. I kept telling them it wouldn't, but they ended up liking it. I walked out of the theater and I wanted to blurt this out: "You have the shittiest taste in film that was the worst f*cking movie I've ever seen." But I have manners. This movie has everything you want to stay away from: Carmen Electra, Matt Lanter, and worst of all, Kim Kardashian! Were these directors on crack or something? I can understand Electra and Lanter, but Kim Kardashian? C'mon, America! We've given her enough spotlight. All this really does is spoof movies that the directors are jealous of.

Grade: F
KJ P

Super Reviewer

January 25, 2010
Has it's few laughs, just like ever spoof movie! But the problem is that it is solely just like every other spoof movie! Horrible!
TheGame90
TheGame90

Super Reviewer

January 18, 2010
Are you fucking kidding me?......no let me get that right. Are you fucking.....kidding me? This fucking useless piece of crap of cinema experience is a complete spit in the face of the intelligence of mankind. My first though was "what kind of sick human being reads the script to this and decides that the what to direct this?" Then I learned that it was directed by the same assholes who wrote it. So that was a reliefe. But then I think about everybody else the actors....who reads this and think that this movie will have a possitive affect on that persons carrer in any way? How the hell is it possible for this movie to go through all parts of film making without someone noticing what a pile of unnamed substance it is. I can't believe it....just thinking about it makes me angry. I'm not even gonna use the cheap pop by calling it a "disaster movie".....well looks like I did anyway.....fuck it
ScoopOnline
ScoopOnline

Super Reviewer

December 1, 2009
Destroying one movie at a time.
Inthebakset
Lafe F

Super Reviewer

August 14, 2009
Not enough Disaster-Movie gags! They jabbed at superhero blockbuster hits instead. Most of the jokes were groan-worthy or offensive sexual humour. The story was sucky. I liked the song at the end with the entire cast, but not much else. This is coming from someone who thought Meet the Spartans was a masterpiece.
Thomas J

Super Reviewer

January 31, 2009
No one should watch this type movie expecting anything other than silly, crude humor. This movie delivers that!! hehe It is good as a spoof movie can be I guess!
Nicki M

Super Reviewer

December 4, 2008
Ridiculous, but what else would it be?! The kind of thing you can only watch once, and even then in the background while doing something else. The Juno send up was funny, though, and the Sarah Jessica Parker in drag guy was creepily like her.
Brian D

Super Reviewer

March 5, 2009
Title sums this movie up well.its a pile of dog poo....!!
Roy G

Super Reviewer

January 2, 2009
The "jokes" are limp and pathetic, It's not even value for money
Luke B

Super Reviewer

December 22, 2008
The title is Disaster Movie. Apt. The first word in the film is "Shit". Just abouts sums it all up. Worse than Meet the Spartans and Epic Movie. All the same disgustingly lazy references. It's not a spoof, it just references stuff. Doesn't even have enough faith in it's "look-a-likes" so everybody has to declare who they are supposed to be. Once again jokes go on and on. Apparently 3 super-heroes getting hit by cows is going to be funnier than just 1. It's the painful rape of cinema. The laziest film ever made. Only a couple of attractive women have anything to offer. May Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer be tortured, raped, along with their children and their children's children.
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