The Ice Pirates Reviews

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Super Reviewer
February 10, 2009
Bizarre flick frankly, swings from kids adventure in some places to quite adult material in others. Its a full mix of 'Mad Max' 'Star Wars' 'Krull' and 'Star Trek' with 'Pirates of the Caribbean' character types at the helm. Completely hokey to the max with idea rip off's left right and centre plus a casual made for TV look.

The cast is epic (check an early Ron Perlman) but they are all let down by this weird plot that makes no real sense.
Its almost fun but a little too off the wall too I'm afraid, it tries to fit in way too much into one film and the effects are pretty dodgy as well, dodgy now and dodgy back then. I liked it as a kid but now it just seems rather stupid and cheesy, and shouldn't it be called 'The Water Pirates'?
Super Reviewer
May 28, 2011
This movie has some charm, but for the most part it's very uncertain of itself. Is it a parody or spoof? Is it a serious sci-fi movie? Should the jokes be adult or kiddie? Well, it's got a little of everything, sci-fi, comedy, action, adventure, romance, and a strange ending. I couldn't make up my mind whether I liked it or not, so I'll just say it was okay. There are some really funny scenes, though, and that's what I liked the most about it.
Super Reviewer
July 19, 2009
An utterly terrible, bumbling mess of camp and sci-fi. And, for that reason, thoroughly enjoyable for its ridiculousness. Buxom space amazons riding unicorns? Space herpes? Conveyor-belt assembly-line castration devices? Bumbling chippendale battle robots?

An overlooked B-Film that delivers an endless amount of confusing, ridiculous throw-away plot elements. While it won't earn it high scores, to its credit, it never becomes tedious or boring.

A hasty, tongue-in-cheek madcap adventure that fails to impress, but succeeds in keeping your attention.
Super Reviewer
½ July 11, 2007
Corny and fun; not as bad as I thought it would be. Almost as goofy as Monty Python and the Holy Grail in space. It's a silly runaround on a space ship and a planet though. Bruce Vilanch is a weird thing.
Super Reviewer
March 9, 2007
HAHA - This makes the Campy/Corny 80's flicks list for sure. Actual smart ass space pirates (with swords even) trying to rid the evil bad guys of their extra water, which has become the most valuable substance in the universe. I know, I know - they can build spaceships and laser guns, faster than light travel and cool, funky, jive turkey, kung fu knowing, break dancing robots and they can't figure out how to combine hydrogen and oxygen.

Robert Urich plays the enigmatic, charming pirate with the heart of gold. You also have John Matusak from Caveman (also Sloth from Goonies), Ron Perlman, and John Carradine. Oh and Michael D. Roberts as the typical 1980s Token funny black guy. And he was a kick! My favorite character asides from the Karate Robot.

Short, Not serious, goofy and funny with some campy space action. Still decent to watch today. Yes Joby, It was on HBO ALL the time when we were kids!
Super Reviewer
December 25, 2007
½ December 21, 2012
It's really, really dumb and fun in a Family Guy kind of way. A parody of 80's pop sci-fi the film is able to make some contemporary comments on the 1980's and is just silly for 90 minutes.
September 5, 2009
Super cheesy fantasy/apocalypse film in outerspace. Water is a commodity and controlled by the ruling class. Some captured pirates are sold to a princess whose father has gone missing. She enlists their help to locate him in this odd adventure. Space herpes, a rape joke, and Bruce Vilanch betray this as a comedy.
June 9, 2009
Never said I understood this cheesy and silly science fiction pirates movie. It's funny in its own way.
May 17, 2009
I liked it when I was a kid. I seen it again not to long ago ,and thought it was actually lame. But still if you want to watch something different....
November 21, 2008
Absolutely and fantastically odd, I loved every minute of this movie. Did any of it make sense? Not really. Did they intend it too? Definitely not. And therein lies its greatness. A shining example of 80s cinema at its best.
August 5, 2008
In another part of the galaxy, water is so scarce it's like diamonds and gold, and so scurvy 'ice pirates' roam the space ways searching to steal ice from passing ships! Stewart Raffill directs a cast that would later be in well known movies and series, like Ron Pearman(Beauty and the Beast, Hellboy), and, Angelic Huston, (Addams Family) Robert Urich (Vegas) and John Carridine. When Mary Crospy's character, the Princess Corinna, is napped on a pirate run, the Templar authorities are after them, while a barter is reached, to find the mythical seventh planet, where there is plenty of water. Cheesy sets, fog machines, goofy characters, crazy machines, and wacky sets make for a cult hit in the making, way ahead of it's time, and funnier than later Spaceballs. Done on a cheap budget, but still extremely satircal and funny. Not such much a riff on Star Wars as the 70s Buck Rodgers, Battlestar Galactica, Mad Max, and Time Bandits. Space Eunochs, crazy battles, painted set backdrops, and suggestive situations make for a trip back into time. Beware the dreaded Space Herpees! This is clearly meant for teenage guys, or adult guys who saw it 26 years ago.
December 23, 2007
Classically strange and good/bad B movie. Mary Crosby is...just the hottest thing in space. So yummy. Funny moment, strange ideas, funny one liners, and Bruce Vilanch make this a pretty sweet deal. Oh, and did I mention really young Ron Perlman? Because yeah, really young Ron Perlman. As a pirate. Who OH! and Angelica Houston being stangely attractive as well. Its a good flick for people who like bad flicks.
July 16, 2007
As stupid as it might apear, it is in its own way a cult classic. You would never find another space movie like this.
June 24, 2007
Robert Urich's finest performance. Three stars does not do this movie justice ... but it is more than it deserves. Space herpes!
June 18, 2007
Science Fiction fun at its best with a young (and demonstrably hot) Anjelica Huston and the sizable Ron Pearlman. The plot is silly but captivating and the world itself is simple but well made. Also any movie with Space Herpes is just too good not to see.
½ May 10, 2007
A great cult classic film from 1984. A very entertaining film with a lot of good humor and a great cast.
May 9, 2007
I still love this movie. It's so freaking silly that you can't help but enjoy it. The scenes with the Space Herpy is especially messed up.
½ May 1, 2007
Soooo stupid and so cheesy it can be considered a cult classic. This film is so bad and cheesy it has to be seen to be believed!
½ April 30, 2007
Robert Urich as a space pirate. If you loved Pirates of the Caribbean, this is the same sort of movie, only it's in space. There's time travel, space herpies, stupid robots, sword fights, road warrior car chases, and hot holographic sex. Ron Pearlman and Anjelica Houston costar.
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