It's low-brow entertainment with high-tech execution, and while it's anything but scary, it IS cheesy, corny, gimmicky, gory fun.
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12/17/09
My Bloody Valentine 3D (2009)
55
%
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Reviews Counted:78
Fresh:43
Rotten:35
Average Rating:5.7/10
Consensus: This gory, senses-assaulting slasher film is an unpretentious, effective mix of old-school horror stylings and modern 3D technology.
Theatrical Release:Jan 16, 2009 Wide
Box Office: $51,527,787
Synopsis: Bloodthirsty fans of the classic slashers of yesteryear should be sated by MY BLOODY VALENTINE (2009), a gory trip that’s not just a remake but a retro-amalgam of the greatest hits from the 1970s,... [More]
Starring: Jensen Ackles, Jaime King, Kerr Smith, Betsey Rue
Director: Patrick Lussier
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Reviews for My Bloody Valentine 3D
...a consistently underwhelming horror endeavor that seems to exist for no reason other than to serve the current 3D fad...
11/06/09
If a movie like My Bloody Valentine plays like a dime-store slasher picture, then adding 3D to the proceedings will only make it look like a 3D dime-store slasher picture.
10/22/09
Yes, it's stupid, ridiculously gory and you might lose brain cells with each passing second -- but you might have some fun watching!
06/10/09
Though it stands as one of the better horror remakes to come along in recent memory, 2009's My Bloody Valentine still only just passes for competent watchability.
05/29/09
Unfortunately for the victims, that maladjusted miner will grab your heart. While My Bloody Valentine takes gore in a few inventive directions, and it's not just the living room 3-D.
05/15/09
It's Scream before Scream, minus the deconstructive verve.
04/23/09
This one-trick, entirely derivative exercise in old-school slasher tropes doesn't stretch very far.
04/07/09
Meu desejo era o de que o Mineiro realmente aproveitasse a tecnologia tridimensional e, acabando com meu sofrimento, rasgasse a tela com sua picareta, libertando-me da tortura de acompanhar suas aventuras.
03/13/09
Valentine is not attempting to appeal to highbrows, but its general lack of ambition in the face of both a potentially exciting new technology and a script that suggests a potential emphasis on characterization is rather dispiriting.
02/15/09
It will appeal to slasher fans (though it's by no means a standout example of the genre) and those with a black sense of humour who will no doubt think the in-bred, mean, cheating folks in this town are getting the devil they deserve.
02/13/09
If you've got a strong stomach, My Bloody Valentine 3D is a definite pleasure...albeit a guilty one, in the perversely stupid tradition of all good gore films.
02/13/09
Blending ample serves of gore and nudity with a dash of self-awareness, Lussier skilfully uses the 3D format to simulate the perspectives of both predator and victim...
02/13/09
Though the script is flat and the acting perhaps intentionally stilted, Lussier's trump card is a distinctive blend of new technology and old-fashioned prosthetic effects.
02/13/09
In a packed auditorium in 3D, the film is a true thrill ride -- a communal experience of shared screams and relieved laughter.
02/10/09
If you like a bloody laugh and you relish the idea of body parts hurtling at you threatening to shower your popcorn with blood, this might be the film for you. Greeted by more guffaws than screams, My Bloody Valentine wears its heart on its pickaxe
02/09/09
One ultimately settles into the usual slasher movie viewing pattern of not so much really watching than simply waiting for the next kill.
02/06/09
undeniably hokey, but also giddily effective, with the 3-D turning what might otherwise be a routine slash-and-hack job into a ridiculously gory theme park ride
02/04/09
It manages a few surprises -- and in a genre as worn-out as this one, a few surprises are all it takes.
01/29/09
It's a lousy movie all around, but I had a great time watching it.
01/29/09
Latest News for My Bloody Valentine 3D
September 08, 2009:
Patrick Lussier in Talks for Halloween 3-D 
Having decided not to partner up with Rob Zombie for the next "Halloween" sequel, Dimension has entered into talks with Patrick Lussier ("My Bloody Valentine 3D"). More...
May 09, 2009:
Exclusive: The Art of Coraline with Henry Selick
Henry Selick, the animation mastermind behind such Certified Fresh classics as The Nightmare Before Christmas and James and the Giant Peach adds another gong to his cabinet with... More...
January 19, 2009:
Box Office Guru Wrapup: Paul Blart Segways Ahead of the Competition
This weekend the North American box office was on fire once again as four new releases all scored muscular debuts helping to drive the marketplace to the biggest January weekend... More...
January 16, 2009:
UK Critics Consensus: The Wrestler Pile-drives The Critics, But Don’t Waste any £s on Seven Pounds
With critical success for Slumdog Millionaire last week (94%), we have more award-friendly fare in the UK cinemas this Friday in Darren Aronofsky's spandex-tastic The Wrestler.... More...
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