No Such Thing (2002)



Critic Consensus: No consensus yet.

No Such Thing Videos & Photos

Movie Info

Disgusted with human evolution and a society driven by instant gratification and voyeuristic sensationalism, a foul-mouthed Monster kills anyone who crosses his path. When a news crew sent to investigate the Monster disappears, their ratings-obsessed boss sends a guileless young woman to follow up on the story. This young journalist forges an unlikely friendship with the Monster.

Rating: R (for language and brief violence)
Genre: Drama, Science Fiction & Fantasy, Comedy
Directed By:
Written By: Hal Hartley
In Theaters:
On DVD: Jul 9, 2002
United Artists Films/ MGM - Official Site

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as Beatrice

as The Boss

as Dr. Artaud

as Fred

as Carlo

as Berger

as Beautician

as Karlsdottir

as Journalist

as Beautician

as Scientist

as Concierge

as Journalist

as Monster
Show More Cast

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Critic Reviews for No Such Thing

All Critics (45) | Top Critics (17)

I watched the brainless insanity of No Such Thing with mounting disbelief.

Full Review… | April 10, 2002
New York Observer
Top Critic

No Such Thing may be far from perfect, but those small, odd Hartley touches help you warm to it.

Full Review… | April 5, 2002
Top Critic

Everything's serious, poetic, earnest and -- sadly -- dull.

March 29, 2002
Washington Post
Top Critic

By the end of No Such Thing the audience, like Beatrice, has a watchful affection for the monster.

March 29, 2002
Washington Post
Top Critic

Hartley never gets a firm grasp on this material.

Full Review… | March 29, 2002
San Francisco Chronicle
Top Critic

What [Hartley] wants, and gets, is a fablish mood.

Full Review… | March 29, 2002
Top Critic

Audience Reviews for No Such Thing


Robert Burke is brilliant as the monster as is his makeup; Sarah Polley plays against him very nicely; director/composer Hal Hartley's score is a masterpiece; the rest of the film however is a frustrating mess of worthless subplots and underused castmates all rolled up into a lackluster film with a (anti)climax that most will feel cheated by.

A.D. Villarreal

Super Reviewer

This is a well written story made on a shoe string budget. All the character are well developed and there are some beautiful shots of Iceland. The story is about of an immortal rock like creature who has lived since the world was formed. He watched animals evolve to the current period in time. He lives in isolation to avoid the human race, he had a bad run ?in with them several hundred years ago. He meets a naďve and beautiful reporter and she convinces him to come back to society. It all goes wrong through the middle of the movie. Helen Merrin plays her exploitive editor. The Movie start and finishes good , but the middle is a little slowly paced and predictable. The shoe string BBC production value can only be compared to the final days of the 70?s era ?Doctor Who? I would only recommend this to hard core sci-fi or movie buffs.

Bill Cavros

Super Reviewer

I found the main characters inconsistent. A lot of things in the film seem to be have no point. I just didn't get it.

Marion Ravenwood

Super Reviewer

No Such Thing Quotes

– Submitted by Frances H (16 months ago)
– Submitted by Christian P (4 years ago)

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