Staunton Hill Reviews
If you watch a lot of horror movies, even if you don't, you come to the realization that when unsuspecting young people accept a ride from a stranger, you know things will get bad and boy, they really do get bad here as our young friends fall victim to Buddy, the Leatherface-like killer that has neither the face of leather, nor any of the eccentric charm of the Sawyer family's favorite chainsaw-wielding son.
Staunton Hill contains some particularly gory scenes some of which include "ewww"-worthy skinning/scalping scenes, a few scenes that feature some nice runny/dripping gore sprinkled in with a few nice squirts of blood erupting from arteries now and then.
But what scared me more than all of the above was that these vibrant young adults can't fight their way away from an elderly woman in a wheelchair, an obese lumberiing woman who can't take 10 steps without running out of breath, and her half wit son.
Every cliché you associate with the Crazy Redneck Slasher genre is here in this movie. The sexed-up hitchhikers, the broken down truck, the mentally challenged son, the meat hooks and the dirt-poor family who just might be having you for dinner.
There's some oddball subplot that I honestly never understood about the family harvesting skin for something, an operating room sequence that they keep flashing to, but I never understood what it all meant, and didn;t care enough to look it up for the purposes of this capsule review.
Pass, unless you're just morbidly curious about Romero's son and his (lack of) directing ability.
Orginally I wrote the "JUST HATE THIS FRICKIN FILM. it does nothing new. the "movie" blames it on a retarted person so he is not to blame. like i havent seen that before." now as insensitive as I was this "movie" deserves it and now it has become apparent to me this would simply be a nice towards the movie. As I look over to the the lastest reviews of the movie I noticed someone with a similar view as me giving it a 10% and saying " this is one of the worst freakin movies i've ever seen. what a total piece of crap."
Oh yes that is what I like to see some reblion directed at this movie. Now if you click on this movie's page you will notice it has a 10% like rate. Now what confuses me is how there is such a demigraphic.
I like to say a story when I write review but today is not for fun it is about revenge for scaring me. I do not need any assistance regarding this movie it has left such images in my head of hate that I can't bear it and this seems to be the only way to repel the thoughts of Stauton Hill.
Now that I have come back to see this monster face to face I looked at it's soul and lack there of. The director of the movie one G. Cameron Romero I would like to rant oboot him for making such a movie and thinking he is doing good in the world. When I can't. Why you may ask well he is film maker that has only made one movie it is more diffecult to see through his eyes with only this project. What I disappointment. So only because I hate this movie so much I am going to tell you his like in vivid detail.
G. Cameron Romero's day "I wake in bed of needles and as I grip my blanky that I still carry with me at all times. I proceed to take a shouwer and this would include wipping off my feetly PJs and running out side in the buff of course to the nearest water supply. This is a public fountain now let's just say I am famnous I find money in my fountain of lust. You know a quarter a nickel and a s*** tone of pennies. After this act I return to my huble abood my card board box. It is a the love of my life we have adopted my children together. After killing them I use the blood from them to have a real feel for my movie Staunton Hill. Then with all of the movie I collect from the fountain of lust I finance my supurb movie. Hope to make more in the future."
Ok there you go, the life of the director he is one hell of a guy. To bad he is going to recieve the Transformers 3 experance from me. :) I can't wait.
Now on to the movie itself..... yea enough said it is better just not to know.
Final verdict: 1% out of 100% why am I being so nice you wonder well I the movie does end.....