Opening

91% Dawn Of The Planet Of The Apes Jul 11
100% Boyhood Jul 11
15% Rage Jul 11
21% A Long Way Down Jul 11
—— The Class Of '92 Jul 08

Top Box Office

17% Transformers: Age of Extinction $37.1M
23% Tammy $21.6M
85% 22 Jump Street $9.8M
30% Deliver Us from Evil $9.7M
92% How to Train Your Dragon 2 $9.0M
47% Earth to Echo $8.4M
49% Maleficent $6.2M
53% Jersey Boys $5.2M
24% Think Like a Man Too $4.9M
90% Edge of Tomorrow $3.7M

Coming Soon

—— The Purge: Anarchy Jul 18
—— Sex Tape Jul 18
42% Wish I Was Here Jul 18
—— Hercules Jul 25
—— Lucy Jul 25

Premieres Tonight

100% Masters of Sex: Season 2
60% Ray Donovan: Season 2
79% The Strain: Season 1

New Episodes Tonight

—— Devious Maids: Season 2
—— Endeavour: Season 2
100% Falling Skies: Season 4
79% Halt and Catch Fire: Season 1
64% The Last Ship: Season 1
100% Last Tango in Halifax: Season 2
69% The Leftovers: Season 1
50% The Musketeers: Season 1
46% Reckless: Season 1
54% Salem: Season 1
50% True Blood: Season 7
—— Unforgettable: Season 2
80% Vicious: Season 1
—— Witches of East End: Season 2

Certified Fresh TV

—— 24: Live Another Day: Season 9
84% Extant: Season 1
79% Halt and Catch Fire: Season 1
73% Murder in the First: Season 1
97% Orange is the New Black: Season 2
97% Orphan Black: Season 2
79% Penny Dreadful: Season 1
84% Welcome to Sweden: Season 1

Vampires Suck Reviews

Rafer Guzman
Newsday
Top Critic IconTop Critic

It's almost as cynical as the actual Twilight, and not nearly as funny.

Full Review Source: Newsday

June 3, 2013
Elizabeth Weitzman
New York Daily News
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All but the most die-hard fans can agree that the Twilight movies are spoof-worthy. So it's too bad they don't get a worthy spoof.

Full Review Source: New York Daily News | Original Score: 2/5

June 3, 2013
Tom Huddleston
Time Out
Top Critic IconTop Critic

A few broader references might have made this punishing one-note trawl through the eminently spoofable tween-vamp saga slightly more watchable.

Full Review Source: Time Out | Original Score: 1/5

October 13, 2010
Peter Travers
Rolling Stone
Top Critic IconTop Critic

This movie sucks more.

Full Review Source: Rolling Stone | Original Score: 0/4

August 26, 2010
Nick Schager
Time Out New York
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Below bottom-of-the-barrel.

Full Review Source: Time Out New York | Original Score: 0/5

August 23, 2010
Michael Ordoņa
Los Angeles Times
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Plenty of gags fall flat, but writer-directors Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer... have tapped the vein more effectively than their norm, with enjoyable details and on-the-mark senseless brutality.

Full Review Source: Los Angeles Times

August 19, 2010
Nick Pinkerton
L.A. Weekly
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If you've ever read a single book -- we'll include Stephenie Meyer -- you're probably better than this.

Full Review Source: L.A. Weekly

August 19, 2010
Natalie Southwick
Boston Globe
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With Vampires Suck, the film is just as guilty as the vampires.

Full Review Source: Boston Globe | Original Score: 1/4

August 19, 2010
Adam Markovitz
Entertainment Weekly
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The Twilight Saga, with its operatic gloom and straight-faced fantasy, is undoubtedly ripe for a smart, good-natured ribbing. This isn't it.

Full Review Source: Entertainment Weekly | Original Score: C-

August 19, 2010
Jen Chaney
Washington Post
Top Critic IconTop Critic

Perhaps the filmmakers deserve credit for their one show of restraint: No jokes in this movie have been made at the expense of Justin Bieber.

| Original Score: 0.5/4

August 18, 2010
Bruce Demara
Toronto Star
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Parodies can be hilarious. This one sucks.

Full Review Source: Toronto Star | Original Score: 1/4

August 18, 2010
Jeannette Catsoulis
New York Times
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Aside from the difficulty of spoofing a saga that has always been winkingly aware of its own angsty excesses, there is the inadvisability of angering a tweeniverse whose emotional investment in the originals borders on pathological.

Full Review Source: New York Times | Original Score: .5/5

August 18, 2010
Frank Scheck
Hollywood Reporter
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There's a joke or broad sight gag every 15 seconds or so, but the ratio of hits to misses is nearly nonexistent.

Full Review Source: Hollywood Reporter

August 18, 2010
Nathan Rabin
AV Club
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Vampires Suck finds Friedberg-Seltzer evolving ever so slightly, but adequacy remains out of their grasp, and mediocrity might just be an impossible goal.

Full Review Source: AV Club | Original Score: D

August 18, 2010
Peter Hartlaub
San Francisco Chronicle
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The running time is a merciful 80 minutes. That's the one reliably great thing about reviewing bad movies: Almost all of the biggest losers are less than an hour and a half long.

Full Review Source: San Francisco Chronicle | Original Score: 1/4

August 18, 2010
Randy Cordova
Arizona Republic
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Two very important things to note about Vampires Suck: The film is a spoof of the Twilight movies, and the title is a good indication of where the level of wit lies.

Full Review Source: Arizona Republic | Original Score: 1.5/5

August 18, 2010
Roger Moore
Orlando Sentinel
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It's the sort of movie where "finger food" is offered at a party. And it's fingers. Haw.

Full Review Source: Orlando Sentinel | Original Score: 1/4

August 18, 2010
Joe Leydon
Variety
Top Critic IconTop Critic

This instantly forgettable trifle is fairly close to worthless.

Full Review Source: Variety

August 18, 2010
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