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Joonatan Itkonen

Tomatometer-approved critic
Biography:

Joonatan is a queer freelance writer with AuDHD from Helsinki, Finland. He writes about pop-culture from a neurodivergent viewpoint, and has an affinity for puns, Japanese cinema, and kind movies.

Reviews

Movies TV Shows
Project Hail Mary (2026) 94% 5/5 EDIT “It's the kind of film you want to see over and over again, from one year to the next, and then generationally into the far future.” – Region Free Mar 13, 2026 Full Review Your Attention Please (2026) 5/5 EDIT “... An instrument of change that encapsulates a moment in time so astutely that it captures the urgency and anger needed to turn the tide. Your Attention Please is one of the most vitally important films of the decade. ” – Region Free Mar 12, 2026 Full Review Haunters of the Silence (2025) 3/5 EDIT “It's not a film for everyone... But those invested in alternative cinema will find a lot to love, especially in its poignant observations of our collective dreams.” – Region Free Mar 10, 2026 Full Review War Machine (2026) 70% 1/5 EDIT “War Machine is the worst kind of bad movie: It's too dour to have any fun, and just on the wrong side of competent to elicit any laughs, intentional or otherwise.” – Region Free Mar 6, 2026 Full Review THE BRIDE! (2026) 57% 2/5 EDIT “Showy and all over the place, The Bride! isn't a good movie, but it's certainly the most movie you'll see this year.” – Region Free Mar 4, 2026 Full Review The Bluff (2026) 57% 1/5 EDIT “Usually these kinds of films have at least one or two great one-liners. Something that makes the journey worth the effort. Not here. This is a by-the-numbers script written with such disinterest it doesn't even register as cynical.” – Region Free Feb 23, 2026 Full Review Blades of the Guardians (2026) 96% 5/5 EDIT “A triumph of wuxia cinema, Blades of the Guardians is gorgeous filmmaking on an epic scale that makes the heart soar. ” – Region Free Feb 17, 2026 Full Review Crime 101 (2026) 88% 3/5 EDIT “Crime 101 is just fine, which is as much of a compliment as it isn't. It has the basics down to science, everything else is a little loose. Yet there are worse Heat imitations to watch, and that's not nothing.” – Region Free Feb 11, 2026 Full Review Wuthering Heights (2026) 57% 1/5 EDIT “It is possible to make a bad adaptation that is still interesting and rewarding in its own way. By contrast, it is something else entirely to make a bad adaptation that is also dull as dishwater.” – Region Free Feb 9, 2026 Full Review Seeds (2025) 97% 5/5 EDIT “Filmed in gorgeous black and white, Shyne evokes grand imagery of the south that is loving but pointedly not romanticized. Seeds is a thoughtful, beautiful, and immensely timely film that everyone should see.” – Region Free Feb 6, 2026 Full Review Ghost Elephants (2025) 100% 4/5 EDIT “For those who love his narrative style, Ghost Elephants delivers plenty to admire.” – Region Free Feb 6, 2026 Full Review Blame (2025) 5/5 EDIT “Frei's empathetic and smartly constructed documentary should be mandatory viewing not just to understand the origins of the pandemic, but for everyone to gain perspective on the nature of lies and fear, and how easily they can devour us all.” – Region Free Feb 6, 2026 Full Review Agatha's Almanac (2025) 4/5 EDIT “This lovingly constructed portrait of director Amalie Atkins' 90-year-old aunt, Agatha Bock, is tender and melancholy but so full of life it never feels anything less than joyous.” – Region Free Feb 6, 2026 Full Review Greenland 2: Migration (2026) 49% 1/5 EDIT “Greenland 2: Migration is a lousy sequel to an equally lousy film that didn't need one. It's a soporific way to spend two hours, and lord knows there are far better and cheaper ways to sneak in a nap these days.” – Region Free Feb 6, 2026 Full Review Good Luck, Have Fun, Don't Die (2025) 83% 5/5 EDIT “You know that whatever you're seeing is the work of a singular vision. There's no committee in sight. For better and for worse, this is unfiltered insanity right from the source.” – Region Free Jan 28, 2026 Full Review 28 Years Later: The Bone Temple (2026) 92% 5/5 EDIT “As The Bone Temple barrels towards the inevitable climax, DaCosta builds up one of the most fascinating and intellectually satisfying finales in horror history.” – Region Free Jan 28, 2026 Full Review Send Help (2026) 93% 2/5 EDIT “There is an inkling of a great film buried within Send Help... Sadly, the timid script is hellbent on taking every lazy and unimaginative way out of the tantalizing setup, which leads to an unsatisfying ride held together by the luminous Rachel McAdams.” – Region Free Jan 26, 2026 Full Review Mercy (2026) 25% 1/5 EDIT “It must be Thanksgiving in January, there's no other way to explain a turkey of this magnitude.” – Region Free Jan 21, 2026 Full Review All You Need Is Kill (2025) 83% 3/5 EDIT “As a visual feast, All You Need Is Kill is a satisfying thrill that should satisfy sci-fi fans everywhere.” – Region Free Jan 16, 2026 Full Review The Rip (2026) 79% 4/5 EDIT “Two things can be true at once: The Rip is a great film and it is released at the absolute wrong time.” – Region Free Jan 16, 2026 Full Review Primate (2025) 78% 1/5 EDIT “Primate is a short and brutal experiment in stuffing as many kills into a single location as possible. But in its haste to get to the gore, it overlooks any semblance of character or setup necessary to make us care about the slaughter.” – Region Free Jan 8, 2026 Full Review Marty Supreme (2025) 93% 1/5 EDIT “There's nothing to chew on here, no lines that stick with the viewer once the film ends. It's like being stuck in an elevator with a loudmouth braggart who believes shouting others into silence is the same as winning an argument.” – Region Free Dec 26, 2025 Full Review Anaconda (2025) 48% 1/5 EDIT “Anaconda isn't just a bad film; it's the kind of disaster that in the past would have rightfully ended careers.” – Region Free Dec 23, 2025 Full Review Dead of Winter (2025) 76% 2/5 EDIT “Like an airport novel, it has passages that surprise with occasional eloquence that are lost in a sea of tired tropes and aimless twists.” – Region Free Dec 22, 2025 Full Review Avatar: Fire and Ash (2025) 66% 1/5 EDIT “Bloated beyond belief, the third Avatar is an exercise in tedious plotting, ugly stereotypes, and dull action.” – Region Free Dec 16, 2025 Full Review
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