10,000 B.C. Reviews
This is by no means a good movie, but if you come in with absolutely no expectation, suspend your logic, and just pretend the whole story took place 10,000 b.c, in a galaxy far far away, you might be slightly entertained like i did.
It makes no literal sense! First it starts with a moron of a caveman hunting mammoths and running from inaccurate size smilodons then it shows the Egyptians building pyramids with Mammoths. This movie should be renamed to the adventures of the Inaccurate caveman.
my positive review of the film "Quest for Fire" has led me here, just to this worst of all Emmerich crappy films.
My time is too precious to more than just briefly refer to the film-defects that make me downright angry. Angry because a truely great film like "Quest for Fire" is less well known and less profitable than Swabian-Spielbergs "kunterbunte mammoth sause". (untranslateable)
The shortcomings are mentionened sufficiently in the 1-stars. Nevertheless, the most important aspect:
Emmerich charcters are generally so stereotyped, one-dimensional, bloodless and fake, that they do not actually touch me at all. So as much as 0.0. They only serve as extras, as a human dummy for CGI bombastic overkill effects. As a spectator one should at least care for certain characters, hope for them or fear. Emmerich has the "talent" that I do not care about all his characters.
Whether someone dies or not, I simply don't care at all. And I had this feeling even stronger than in other films here of R.E.
Because due to the setting in 10,000 bc, it is even more obvious, that the assembled troop of pop-batches here act in sheer mummery like a bunch of carnival astray - hilarious.
Nothing seems authentic, just fake in every way.
Sorry, but a director who refuses to take his characters seriously or cannot even make them lovable, "wastes" all his technical FX.
Rating = Aaaarrrgggggggggghhhh 15%