Magic in the Water Reviews
Simply put, this is the worst movie I've ever had the displeasure of watching.
This promising yet dismal premise finds young Ashley (played by a charmingly cute Sarah Wayne in her only film to date) joining her brother and father on a vacation to a lake near British Columbia where legend has it that a sea creature named "Orky" inhabits the water. The young girl becomes officially convinced this legend is true when she leaves some cookies on a doc and they are magically eaten the next day. Coincidence???
Whether this premise may be considered fascinating or entirely too corny will depend on the viewer's tolerance for straight up absurdity. Yes it is a fantasy, but this seemingly is just a copycat job of earlier (and better) Steven Spielberg movies. Some viewers may look deeper into the fact that the father and daughter relationship factor seems to be the prime focus, but the job does not quite get done here. An appealing cast does its best, but they've all surely done better projects before and after (save for Wayne).
Though some sentimental viewers may remember this one fondly (if they were a VERY undemanding youngster), few will argue that there is nothing here that has not been done better in other family/fantasy films. One would think that a film with a good cast, attractive filming locations and overall good intentions would produce better results. Don't get your hopes up, folks!
1st: The lines are ridiculously LONG!! over hour wait for ONE slow slide!!
2nd:The lifeguards have no idea what they are doing.
3rd: Over 3 times the wave pool and roller-coaster water ride had "technical difficulties" and had to be shut down!
I drove an hour to get there and got to go on ONE ride and in the wave pool for 20mins, I waited an hour in a half in LINE to get onto the coaster ride and right when I was about to get on it broke down AGAIN then they said the park was closing!!! They would not refund my money this place SUCKS!!!!!!! DONT GO HERE!!!
Let's imagine there's a hobo outside a movie theater during the coldest part of winter. You give him a movie ticket and tell him to enjoy the comfortable theater and an entertaining film. 19 minutes later he emerges saying the previews were good, but he'd rather freeze to death than watch that movie.
If this ever happened, it may have happened during a screening of Magic in the Water.
I was invited to a sneak preview of this when I was at the impressionable age of 12. The impression I got was that this was the lousiest movie I had ever seen. I don't actually know what the worst movie of all time is, but this is the worst I've ever sat through.
If someday you find yourself in a sickly hot room, tied to a chair and being told you're going to have to watch Magic in the Water forever with the Clockwork Orange device holding your eyes open, let there be no doubt that you are in Hell. In that way, and in that way only, Magic in the Water made me want to be a better person, because I just have a feeling that Satan has this in his library, unless of course not even he can watch it.
I also would like to advise anyone who has children not to give this as a Christmas gift (or a gift of any kind). They will not only think it means they are bad, but they will believe they are unloved. Hated even. They may take it as a notice that you are about to give them away. I wouldn't even give this to my worst enemy. I'm sure that person would probably rather just be killed.
You may think this review funny or unfunny. You may think it a complete waste of time. You may be mad at yourself for reading it, but it is still better than this movie, as is just about everything else.